How to Build a Successful Coaching Business When You Don’t Know What You’re Doing Yet

I'll be honest, I think as a single mom of 3, you just keep going. Like, there's not room to not be okay. So I don't think I really even knew that. I just knew, like, there was a reason I was in that room because I wasn't happy with my J-O-B. So I knew that. I just didn't know what that meant.

Welcome back. I am Bunny Young, serial entrepreneur, mom of 4 beautiful kids, and your host of the Yes And Podcast. And I'm here to tell you that the voices inside your head that's saying you're bad at business are lying. There's no playbook. You get to build a life and a business that love you back and work for you, not the other way around. And you don't have to go faster. You actually will get further by going deeper. Not just into the strategy, but into the energetics that make you and your business a unique unicorn. So just for you today, I brought a guest who's going to help you understand what it actually looks like to rebuild your life and build a business at the same time. Lisa Miller is a relationship coach who 9 years ago was right where many of you might be right now. Her marriage had ended and she was facing an overwhelming uncertainty of rebuilding her life as a mom of 3 incredible boys. And I know because I have met each and every one of them. She shared that she felt lost, scared, desperate for clarity, and instead of waiting until she was healed to start, she transformed her pain into her power. Today, she has helped countless women and men take back their lives, heal their hearts, and step into their worth. She also has exploded her Instagram to almost 300,000 followers in a year's time with her message and her story. So I cannot wait to get into this with her. She's also somebody that I have the privilege of calling a friend, and we were— we're going to get into this, but I just want you guys to know you get like some real true behind the scenes of the power of being in the right place and your story and your past and your history, and it just, yeah, it gets to be so much better. So this conversation is about what has to happen inside of you for the business to actually work, and I cannot wait for you to hear it. So Lisa, welcome to the Yes and Podcast.

Thank you. I'm excited to be here. Oh my gosh. Yeah, Benny and I go way back. Um, she was actually my very, very first real business coach. So I owe a lot of my business success to Miss Bunny Young, who I love and adore.

We go even further back because we graduated high school from the same high school.

Yeah, I'm just way older.

And even further back than that because I actually played softball and practiced softball at your dad's business.

Yeah, the batting cages in Agoura Hills that are no longer there, but yes.

I know, and I was probably like 9 years old when I was doing that, so.

Oh my gosh, so what's crazy is it, it shut down when my middle son was a baby, like an infant, like he maybe was 6 months old. I have a picture of me holding him in my arms and he just turned 18 last week, so. Wild.

I know that makes me feel super old. So—

Me too. Don't worry, me too.

Yeah, you could have used those batting cages as well because all 3 of your boys play, uh, softball. They don't play softball, they play baseball.

Yeah, so my oldest didn't. My oldest played basketball in high school, but my, my 2 younger ones absolutely do. And my middle one is now going off to college to play, so super exciting.

Not to U of A though.

No, he's going to Northern Kentucky.

Okay. So I'm, I'm going to give you guys, like, as listeners, I'm going to give you all of the behind the scenes on the synergies with this. Okay. So Lisa's sons are going to the high school that we went to. And I went to University of Arizona. Her oldest son is going to Arizona State University. Lisa went to Arizona State University. So we had this moment where we were like, Um, oh, where'd you go to college? And she's like, Arizona. I was like, U of A? And she's like, no, ASU. And we're like, oh, you know, because it's total rivalries.

Yeah.

And just this, the synergies in our lives as well. And I, I want to go back to, I'm going to go kind of to the middle when we met, and then that goes into this story of the J-O-B that you had when we met. And then it's funny because you had just brought it up, like the day that we met when I was like, are you okay? And you're like, I'm really not. And kind of how everything fell. You used to want to say apart and it really fell aligned.

I love that.

So I want to set, I want to set the stage. We went into a 6-month, $25,000 mastermind. Not knowing each other. And Lisa converted cold into this mastermind from an Instagram ad, pretty much.

Yep.

She walked into this house and almost everybody else in the house had either gone through this like certification program or knew the coach that was running this in some way, shape, or form. And so you kind of already checked your energy out in that aspect of like, I'm here, but like, I just feel like I'm— I, how would you describe it walking into the house after you found out?

I, I was an outsider. Yeah. Every, like everyone had like, like a similar thread of some sort and I had none. And I was like, oh, like I didn't realize walking in there that there was this like prerequisite that like I didn't have until I got there.

Yes. You, but you still dropped $25K or you still dropped whatever like the investment was because we had talked about whether you were gonna do like the individual work Mm-hmm. Cold. What, what were you there for?

So I, I had done my own coaching certification program. Um, I was at the time working full-time still in the entertainment industry. I was miserable. Um, I had the certification. I was like, do I start my own business? I don't even know how. Someone had recommended, um, that coach to me. And so I was like, all right, like it came recommended. I, I was so fresh. I was like, if I could go back in time, I would've done it so differently. But I was so fresh. I was just like, yeah, like, all right, I might as well try it. I was just literally betting on myself. And I tell this to people all the time. I'm pretty sure I was kind of delusional. Like, Yeah. I like, and I think you almost have to be a little delusional to like completely go in on all, like go full all in on yourself. And I was just like, all right, like. This chick's gonna teach me how to run a business. This is what I was thinking, like, she's gonna teach me how to run a business cuz she has a successful business and it's all gonna make sense cuz like I have someone who's gonna teach it to me. So I, and I was gonna be surrounded by other like-minded people, which like excited me and it's gonna be great. And, and so I just did it. I just went for it.

So fast forward to you being there. You said you felt like an outsider and then you and I, for some way, shape, or form, got paired together.

Mm-hmm.

And there was like this breakout session, and I think, I don't even remember what the template was, but I asked you, we ended up in the coach's office, like in her home, in the office.

Yeah.

Um, with my service dog, I'm like sitting on the floor, right? And it's funny cuz I remember thinking, this is the office that I see her coach in, like virtually all the time.

Mm-hmm.

And now we're like—

And you know that.

Yeah, I know. But it was just interesting to like see, just be in the energy.

Mm-hmm.

And I, I told you, I was like, I, I know we're supposed to be doing something, but like, let me just, are you okay? And that's when you told me about the J-O-B that you have, which was this really high, not even like press pressure or stress, but it's like the things that you were doing, you were talking about them as if they were nothing and yet they're selling like multimillion dollar contracts. To these really big people and these names that if we started name-dropping, people would be like, oh my gosh, because you're talking about the music industry, the film industry, the TV shows, all this kind of stuff. And I remember you telling me like all the things you were doing, but there was no energy behind it. Like there was no fulfillment.

I was burnt out. I, I had been doing it for 20 years at that point. I mean, This was back, like, it was either during COVID or right after COVID. And like, I mean, I feel like everyone got sick from COVID on that, from that re— like little like retreat. Do you remember that?

Yes.

So it was like right in like the height of all that. So like we were working like crazy hours and I was just like, this isn't, this isn't for me anymore. I, I mean, it was a great, great experience. I learned so much from it. I got put in some amazing rooms, met amazing individuals, things that people dream about doing. I, did on a daily basis, um, visiting movie sets, all the things. It just didn't light me up anymore, and I knew that. I just didn't know what to do about it.

All right, I want to ask you a question that wasn't planned, because you showed up at that room and were the cheerleader and were bouncy and were smiley and social. And all of the things that you've shared through the beginning of this podcast, no one would have known, Lisa, because You hid it so well. So this is going on. Did anyone around you know how you actually felt? Did you share with anybody else prior to us sitting on the ground in that office that those words, I'm not okay?

I mean, I'll be honest. I think as a single mom of 3, you just keep going. Like there, there's not room to not be okay. So I don't think I, I really even knew that. I just knew like there was a reason I was in that room because I wasn't happy with my J-O-B. So I knew that. I just didn't know what that meant, like moving forward. Like, do I get another one? Do I go and like start my own business? That was like never a dream of mine. I was never like, I wanna be an entrepreneur. Like, I didn't know the first thing about that. Um, I just say, I think I was like in a, like a crossroads and I knew something had to change. I didn't, I didn't know how not okay. I was. Yeah.

And so we did our coaching session that in the middle of this retreat of this bigger mastermind, and Lisa comes to a pretty incredible conclusion during this mastermind. I need your help with this one because we talked about like the cost of leaving your J-O-B.

Mm-hmm.

We talked about what you were gonna lose if you left your J-O-B, and something pretty profound that I think a lot of the women that you work with come to the realization of is the cost of staying.

Oh yeah. I mean, what, what, what are you giving up if you stay?

Because you're talking about relationships, like, you know, a marriage or a relationship. You and I were talking about business.

Right. But internally, it's costing you. Right? Like what, like you're slowly dying inside in both situations if you're not actually happy.

Yes, absolutely. I think one of the biggest compliments that you ever have given me, and I receive so many, and I, I truly like mean that in my heart, is you said that I was supposed to be in this mastermind to meet you.

Mm-hmm. I, I truly believe that cuz the mastermind itself, and we've talked about this, like Did I get anything from it? Yes. Like, I, I, I think you get something from, from anything that you can do if you, if you want to. But did I really truly learn business and how to run a business?

No.

It, it triggered me in a lot of ways. I did a lot of other things, but to really take that leap of faith, I maybe would've done it, maybe wouldn't have if Bunny was in my life, but like having her support and her guidance. Completely transformed my life, not the mastermind.

And that's the mirror that I began to hold up for you that day is I know that you had shared with me, I don't know if I'm going to be an entrepreneur. And I said, well, here's what I know is I know you don't want to do this anymore. I know you don't want to do the J-O-B anymore. And so we started talking about what did light you up? What did you want to choose? What, what was the parts of your story that Made you feel fulfilled. And at that time you were in a relationship. It's so like looking back, oh my gosh, because you guys, there's a huge twist here that we're, we're definitely sharing in this on what life looks like now. But looking back at that, it's like everything, you know how we say like, oh, I'll be there at 1-ish, right? It's like, you know, around 1, not really 1, kind of ish. You were in like a relation-ish.

Mm-hmm.

And a job-ish.

Mm-hmm.

But no one really had like your 100%. And I, we talked about the fact that you weren't really showing up for yourself 100%. And you said right now, like as a single mom of 3, it's like you were making sure the boys were okay. Everybody else was okay. You were managing this relationship with your ex. Mm-hmm. You were trying to pour what you had left over into a relationship that you weren't really getting fulfilled by. Mm-hmm. And making sure that you could show up for your job to get a paycheck to keep a house. Over your family's head.

Yeah.

But there was no fulfillment.

Mm-mm. I mean, I guess as a mom I was fulfilled, but beyond that, no.

And like, even, even, and I know you share this with the women that you work with, is like, even being a parent though is not enough to really feel like—

Oh yeah. I mean, look, I, my kids are older now, so I have one in college, I have one going to college, and I have one starting high school. Like, You have to fulfill yourself in other ways because eventually they, if we do our good job, they leave, right? They, they go off and have their own life. And it's not just about making sure that they are happy, safe, protected, all the things. It's, it's okay. Like now they're off and doing their own thing. Who, who am I? And if you start when they're already gone, you're behind the ball. Like you gotta start living your life now, not a year from now, 2 years from now, 10 years from now. And what does that look like? And sometimes it is a lot and sometimes Mm-hmm. It gets overwhelming, but like, it's, it's all part of the journey.

So you decided job's not for me and you decided I'm going to go full in on myself and then everything was rainbows and butterflies after that, right?

Yeah. Oh yeah. That's what you want to call it. Sure. I mean, I clearly remember when I got my first client, I was like, oh my gosh, like, this is like, this is happening, right? And I will say, like, I would say the first year I actually like was doing pretty good for my first year of business, like not knowing what I was doing. But like anything, there's, there's highs and there's lows and there's, how do you, I mean, there was at one point where I was interviewing to have to just get another J-O-B cuz I was like, I don't know how to do this. Like I was like, I remember that conversation.

You were talking about going to Starbucks.

No, no, no. I, I, I know what you're talking about. No, like, like just to supplement like that. But I was talking about like, no, like, like a full, like full-time job. Like it was maybe like a year or two after the business kind of started and it was like, it was still such a rollercoaster of like some months where I was killing it and some months I'd get like no new clients and I was like, oh my gosh. And again, as a single mom, like not getting a dime from anywhere else. You're like, I need something that's consistent. Mm-hmm. Something that's like gonna, like, you know, so I'm not stressed, so I don't like have to worry about like, oh my gosh, am I gonna be able to pay this bill? 'Cause it's like so, so stressful. And so at one point I was just like, maybe I just need to go back and like put this on hold for now. Maybe this isn't the right time. And by the grace of God, thank God I didn't get the job. Like, and the way, like, that's like the universe had different plans for me for sure. And then my business, like once I was like, okay, just like completely focus your energy on like what you do want. And what I wanted was this business to explode. And like when I fully went all in energetically, physically, emotionally, mindfully, all of it, things started to, to really escalate and, and pretty quickly.

Yes. And there's 2 things that really contributed to that. If you, if you haven't put the pieces together from that mastermind that we were both in, We, Lisa ended up coming and working with me as a one-on-one business client. And I have the honor and the pleasure of being able to be her business coach. And we've had 2 kids together thus far. So, so as we were working together and as you're starting your business, that's the part we were joking about being rainbows and butterflies. And it, it wasn't like Lisa's being totally honest in the aspect that the amount of times that we had a conversation where she's like, tell me what I'm doing wrong. Tell me what to do.

Mm-hmm.

Like, and we put all of this strategy in place and I will tell you guys, like, she's one of the most exceptional clients because like, if, if you give her homework, she's going to do the homework or she's going to be honest with you about why she didn't do the homework. And here, like, here's where I want you to lean in and listen because these 2 things changed. So first off, we had this content strategy and these content pillars and all of this kind of stuff and nothing was really landing or making sense. Until this. So we had this plan. You didn't want to send out DMs. You didn't want to like go through your followers, all this kind of stuff. So you just started doing these masterclasses, whether one person showed up, zero people showed up, like you just started putting in the reps. And I will tell you, there was this session where you started to own the fact that, A, you were really good at this, which I think you knew, but it's like being able to Kind of see that reflected back from clients?

I'll say this, there's still moments where I'm like, oh wait, I am really good at this. Yeah. And I think that's really natural because like when you, when you're first starting out, you have no social proof, you have no physical proof. You're just like, I think I'd be good at this. Like, like a lot of people come to me for, for XYZ. I know I'm like doing it in my personal life, but like then to like have a client and like do it in that life. It seemed a little like strange. I mean, to this day now, I've been doing this a long time and I've had so many clients. There, there are times I get off a call, I'm like, damn, like I, I really don't know what I'm doing.

Yes. And that started to become more and more clear. And one of the reasons that we talked about the work that you do in order to coach individuals and help individuals, In loving others and having successful relationships? What did it need to start with? What does it need to start with with your clients?

Yourself.

Yeah. What do you think was the most powerful thing that you began to do on this entrepreneurial journey?

Loving myself, but all parts of me, not, not just like the parts that are easy to love. Like you have to love the not so pretty parts too, and accepting them and like truly owning your worth. Like in, in a real way.

Without proof.

Without proof. Yeah.

Without external proof. Like unconditionally. Yeah. That's the part that I really want people to hear.

Absolutely. And, and, and what's so interesting about what I do is so many people give their worth, their power to someone else. Like, you validate me, you tell me I'm worthy, then I'm gonna be enough. And like, the truth is when you feel it from within, that's the most powerful place it'll ever be. And that's when you're the most magnetic. That's the happiest you'll ever be is when it's, when it's coming from within, because no one can take it from you, but we so easily give it away.

So this starts to happen and, and wait, this, this is the best. Like, this is not the best part, but this is, I was in the drive-through at In-N-Out Burger in Santa Monica when I got this message from you is I would say for the, like, a month, you had really been consistent with the masterclasses. You had really been consistent with connecting with your clients. You'd really been consistent with the practices that were business practices, but it was about loving yourself and it was about owning your story and unconditional love. And, you know, you even like reframed some of the language around your ex in how you were thinking about and the power and the energy of kind of like taking it back instead of.

Mm-hmm.

blame, you were really owning how you had shown up and what you had done from like a mattress on the ground to like, I'm gonna figure this out. I'm gonna make this work. So you started to find your proof.

Yeah.

And I'm, I'm in this drive-through and I get this message and it's like, so Lisa's basically like, I left my job, right? Like no more job. I'm in this relationship. I start my business and I feel like I'm starting to get going and now I'm leaving my relationship. And it's like the second I start loving myself, the universe is like, okay, let me take away all the external distractions. Are you okay just being with you?

Mm-hmm. And I—

tell me, tell me about that moment.

I mean, it was scary. I mean, there was like, there was a lot of growth in like the first probably 3 years of my business of like growing and shedding and evolving and It's terr— I mean, it's terrifying, right? And, and to really love yourself through those moments of uncertainty.

Mm-hmm.

And of fear and of not knowing, you know, when you're in a relationship for a long time, there's a lot of consistencies and now all of a sudden all of that is gone and you're like, who am I on the other side of this? And how do I, how do I keep showing up when you're in deep heartbreak? Even though I was the one who ended it, it was still like, it was very heartbreaking. Yeah. Um, And there was a lot of healing that had to be done. And here I am like a relationship coach and like, I, I actually like know all the things on how to heal heartbreak and all this stuff, but like when it's you and yourself, it's really hard. You know, it's a whole different ballgame. So, um, but yeah, it, it, when you get to the other side, it's really powerful.

There's 2 parts of this that I want you to share because they were really powerful for you to own. And then I wanna go into how that impacted your social media. And your social media content, really owning these 2 parts. One is, how did you keep going even though your logical brain told you all the reasons that not to, right? And in, in your business and in life, right?

Okay.

Like, okay, because you, it's like the logical proof, right? It's like you didn't, you chose to love yourself even though clients were not Lining up the door with a waitlist. You chose to love yourself even though you chose to not be in a relationship anymore where somebody could love you back, right? Like, there's very logical pieces of the external in your brain that would be like, this isn't working out, go get a J-O-B. How did you choose something differently?

How did I keep going when, when everything looked like it was all falling apart?

With no proof. Exactly.

Yeah. So day by day, I'm gonna be honest. Like when you're, when you're really in that place, it's, it's a, it's almost an hour by hour. Like, okay, like I'm just gonna keep going. I'm gonna keep showing up. It's wild when you think about it. When I think back, it's like, slowly you're like, oh wait, like this is working in my favor. Like, okay, like I'm starting to get a few more people following me, a few more people reaching out. Oh wait, I'm starting to get more clients and like Little by little, like I, like the more I poured into my work, the better I felt. I'll be honest. Like I, I truly believe like my, my business saved me in so many ways because it was so healing to help other people.

Mm-hmm.

And to serve other people and to just be in that energy of like, oh, if I'm helping them, I like, for that hour or whatever, like I didn't have to think about my own drama and my own problems. And it felt so good. And. That really helped me, I think, keep going. Again, like I, I did look for another job and like by the grace of God, I didn't get it, right? I was like, I was a finalist for a job at Sony and I, and I didn't get the job. And I think about it all the time, like what would've happened if I would've gotten it? Would I have taken it? I don't know. But there, there are moments of doubt and moments of insecurity and you just gotta like keep believing that like there's a bigger purpose for me here. I know that, I believe that. I think I was a little delusional, and I just kind of kept pouring into myself in that way. I also think like there's like, there's so many amazing tools out there to help you when you're in that place, and like that's the time you really need to lean into that, into support, and into whoever's there and willing to guide you through that time. Doing it on your own, I wouldn't advise.

Well, I'm so glad that you trusted me during that time and didn't do it alone. And one of the things that we had worked on was this, like, what I would call like a wound to gift, is like being able to own the things that you may perceive as failures as the pieces and parts of you that are actually really special. And I love that. If it's okay to, to share, one of the things that we had talked about when your relationship ended was you had asked vulnerably, not asked me, but asked in a session of like, how, how am I going to do this with my clients when basically my own relationship failed? And I said, this is the part that you share from. Your clients, yes, they, they love a happy ending, right? They, they desire a happy ending. But if they just see somebody who's constantly living a happy ending, let them see the woman who, who made it through a divorce. Let them see a woman who is heartbroken and is pulling herself up still every single day.

Mm-hmm.

And you started to own those pieces and parts of you that you were hiding. Those pieces and parts of you that we talked about in the first day of the mastermind where it's like you started to let people see that you weren't okay.

I think that's like 100% why you become more relatable is when you show all parts of you. When you, when you stop just showing the highlight reel and you start to show every part of you, people are like, oh, she's real. And like that, like that's something I like. It, it makes you more magnetic for sure. Mm-hmm.

So you started to do this and 2 things happened. First is what happened to your social media?

It kind of blew up. It definitely, like, I mean, when I first started that mastermind, I didn't even have Instagram or Facebook. Um, so I, I started it right around the same time we started that mastermind. And when I went through my breakup is when it really started to gain some traction. I didn't, I don't, I didn't even have Facebook then cuz I just started Facebook about a year ago. And like, and, and both of 'em are just like, it's, I mean, it's, it's wild.

Hundreds of thousands of followers who love you.

Yeah.

For you.

Yeah. 'Cause I, I mean, I show it all.

Yeah. Not because you're in love, not because you're slaying it, not because building your business and learning to love yourself happen at the same time in my experience. And I want you to, to share your experience, but in, in my experience, it's like they are in direct relationship with each other. It's not one and then the other.

Mm-hmm.

They're in constant, direct relationship with each other.

That, I mean, that was my experience as well. Like when I fully started to accept myself and love myself and know my worth, know I am enough, cuz that's a lot of our core wounds is I'm not enough. I mean, I've had it, I been healing it for years. I still am healing it. Um, but truly knowing that in the inside, that's when my business started to really explode.

So the second thing that happened, actually, first, can I ask you what, what does self-love mean to you now? Not, not the Instagram version, but like, what is your real practice of self-love now?

Practice, or what does it mean? Because those are two different things to me.

Yes. And okay.

Okay. Okay. So I would say self-love is Accepting all parts of myself, right? Like looking in the mirror and being like, oh damn, like I'm proud of you. Like that, like that to me is like a very loving way to be with myself. It's a, it's about knowing how to make myself happy and knowing, knowing it's not anyone else's job to make me happy and like, and doing it unapologetically, right? So that, that, that's the act, I think.

Mm-hmm.

You know, I, it's funny, I always ask people like, how do you love yourself? And they say things like, oh, I go massage, I get like, and I'm like, well, those are, that's like self-care in my opinion, right? Self-love is like looking in the mirror and being like, I love you.

Mm-hmm.

Like, and actually meaning it. 'Cause I think a lot of us tell our kids we love our kids, we hug our kids, we tell our kids we're proud of 'em, but do we take time for ourself? To really pour into those parts of us that, that need love and attention. Most of us don't.

And your practice, I know you do the mirror work. Is there anything else?

So yeah, so I definitely like, I have conversations with myself in the mirror all the time. I'm like, oh, so proud of you. Like, oh my gosh. Um, something else I do, which it's probably not the norm, but I like do it literally every night before I go to bed. I'm I'm not very religious, but I'm very spiritual, but I'm not religious. I, I literally thank my, the angels, universe, everyone who's like guiding and protecting me. And I ask them to show me a sign every night on like how to do better and be better in my life.

Mm-hmm.

And for my clients and for my people. I believe we get signs and messages while we sleep. And, um, I never wake up and I'm like, oh, that's what I found. Like, that doesn't happen. But I do think my days are, um, very much Like things that I, I think I, my actions and my choices, like things happen because, because I've asked, I have that ask every night. Something else I do, which I believe is self-love, is I script. Do you script at all? Like, I really do think that's like a very loving thing to do for yourself, to put it out into the universe, to trust in yourself and like, like put it out there.

Yes.

Um, I do meditate. I think meditating's a beautiful way to, to be in touch with yourself. I don't do it often, but I do do it. Those are, that's probably it. Those are the highlights, I would say.

Was there a point in our work together where it stopped being homework and it stopped being the rolling of eyes and it stopped being like things that Bunny would tell you to do that it clicked?

Absolutely. I mean, I, I don't know if you remember, but like I would fight against you. I'd be like, I am not doing that. Like, like all this shit was so woo woo to me and like I was like not there. I was like, and you were like, Lisa, just trust me. And you, you would like do these meditations with me and I was like, I like, I'm like, as you start doing it, and, and I see this with my clients now too, and it's like this like soft, like spot in my heart where I'm just like, oh, it's clicking. Like I can see it clicking. Right. Um, but I clearly remember like at like some point you're like, journal on this, or like, you know, like think about this or whatever. And like there was the strategy, but there was the mindset and there was like the inner work. Right. And I was like, all right, I'm just gonna do it cuz like Benny says I should do it. And like at some point I was like, Oh, this is why we're doing it. Okay, I see. And the, and then the external follows, right? Then the clients start to come and the business starts to build and like you start to get this momentum and you're like, well, I'm gonna keep doing that because that, that's good.

Actually, I wanna, I wanna pause for a second because I'm trying to go back to this that you sent me. Can I read what you sent me?

Of course. I'm an open book, Bunny. Go for it.

So I get this text in March, right? We're recording this in May. I get this in March, and Lisa and I haven't been in like an official container for probably over 2 years. Like we've done drop-in sessions and obviously we've stayed connected and we haven't been in 2 years. And I, I'm telling you this because there were points, Lisa, I'm speaking to Lisa right now, but everybody is, can listen to this. I'm not going to tell you to close your ears. Is there pieces and parts when you were doing this that you were like, is this working? And I know you also said that you, yeah, you also have the sessions where you're like, I'm effing amazing, right?

It is.

That's not uncommon. And so 2, over 2 years after working together, out of the blue, I get this text at 7:30 at night and she says, was just thinking I wouldn't be where I am if it wasn't for you and your coaching. Thank you. Forever grateful. And then I was like, this is amazing. And, and I'm not amazing. I am amazing, but I'm not amazing. This is Lisa waking up to the work that she actually committed to and the work that she's done and the growth that she's had. And so the best thing that I could do is to get curious around it. And I said, what did you believe made the biggest difference? And she said, I mean, I literally didn't have one client when I started with you. I had no idea how to be a businesswoman. You taught me. You saw something in me that I didn't see yet. Are we gonna cry? You held me accountable when you pushed me. I could go on. And she said, you were exactly what I needed to get this business up and running. This is the part though. You helped me see— or so I said. I reflected back to her. I said, you, it's that you believed in your dream, trusted yourself, and because of that, there are hundreds of thousands of women who are now in your world trusting that they also deserve to be happy, find love, and live their dreams. And Lisa said, yes, but that's what I mean. I didn't at first. You helped me see that. You helped me trust myself.

Yeah.

And then this is the, the LOL. Life is wild. Just feeling deeply grateful our paths crossed. I called you Bonnie.

That's true.

And you ended up in my backyard. Actually, for another podcast episode, we'll talk about how Lisa and I ended up breaking up a high school party that happened in the backyard at my house. So, and how I just want to give you a second how it feels kind of me reading that and reflecting on that.

I mean, one, it's really powerful cuz like it just shows like one, how amazing Bunny is. Like truly, like she holds a mirror and she does it with such beauty and grace and effortlessly. Like it's, I've had a lot of coaches, um, I've been on a lot of containers and by far Bunny is like, she's amazing at what she does and she really like, sees in you things that maybe you don't see yourself and like helps you get to where you wanna go. Like, I, I truly don't think I would even be where I am today if it was not for her. I don't even know if I would've continued coaching, right? So like, that's, that's what's wild. Um, but hearing it, it's like, wow, like you, how does it make you feel? Like it's gotta, like, like you made such a difference, not just in my life, but because of what you did for me, you've helped thousands of people.

Yeah.

Like it's a domino effect. That's what's so cool.

It's the starfish, right? It's the starfish aspect. You didn't quit on yourself, and I didn't quit on me, right? And, and I, I know I've told you this a million times, probably more. I will hold the mirror until you can hold it for yourself.

Mm-hmm.

And what I want you to hear though, and I want everybody to hear, is you started to see it for yourself and everything changed around you, and then you would forget. And then you would text me, you would want to follow me. Oh yeah, I forget now. Yeah, I still, I still get— that's one of the things that I love as, as a coach is that you're investing in the container. And I also have told you, like, because of the few amount of individual clients that I take, like, I'm yours forever. You know, and so when you forget, I'll get a text, I'll get a message, I'll get a DM, and I'll hold the mirror again. And it's like you're tapping back into the frequency of who you became and who you're continuing to become. And you're tapping into the frequency of somebody who loves you to remind you what it feels like to love yourself and keep going.

Yeah. And it's so important cuz we, we all forget, no matter like what you're trying to do in your life, like there's always moments of like, there's always setbacks, right? Like that's what makes life beautiful. It's like if everything was like peachy keen all the time, like we wouldn't appreciate the really good stuff, right? Um, and like when things are going really well, like you just need someone to like humble you a little bit and be like, okay, like, like this also doesn't last forever.

Yeah.

Like nothing lasts forever. Like truly the good or the bad. Like it all, there's always like highs and lows, right? And it's so important to have people in your life that like, can remind you that like, okay, you're gonna get through this too.

Yeah.

And like, you're gonna, you're gonna rise above because like, look at all the evidence. 'Cause we, we forget as humans.

Exactly. We forget. 100%.

You know, I have a, you can't see it, but like there's a, there's a, a note on my, on my wall that actually, um, I believe Bunny actually told me to do, and it's, it has 10 things. It's From 2/22/22. Okay, it's dated. And it's 10 things that like I was manifesting that I wanted to have happen. And all of those things have happened some numerous times over. But I, I look at it all the time. I'm like, that's where, like, that's where I wanted to be in 2022. And now we're in 2026 and like, I'm like way exceeded a lot of those things. And it blows my mind. It's like, it's such a, like, it's such a crazy tool, um, to just like see where you wanna go and like be like, oh, I've been there. I did it. I actually did it. I made those things happen. And like, at the time they seemed so far away and like I would never be able to do half of those things. And I've done all of them a few times.

And we forget, we forget that the life that we have now, the version of us from 5, 10, 20 years ago, was praying for this?

Oh yeah. Oh, I think about that all the time.

Yeah.

I was like, like I think about just 'cause, you know, it's like from 2020 to now, it's 6 years later. It's like I could never have even imagined being where I am right now. It like, it still blows my mind. I'm like, wow. Like I have come so far and I, to me, 6 years isn't that long and There's no way I could have done that without the support of you. There's just no way.

Well, I fully receive that, and I believe other than your boys and maybe your parents that I have so much love for you. However, I have a little bit of competition now because something else happened other than your 300,000 followers when you fully— it's like you People talk about this all the time, and it's like, I guess the key to manifestation. I don't guess, it's the key to manifestation in the aspect that the unattachment is that you really showed up, loved yourself to the point that I get this message. I get this message of like, it doesn't even matter if I have somebody, like if I ever date again or I ever find someone again, I get this message.

Mm-hmm.

And then Less than a month later, I get another message. And granted, I already know something's up because I follow her and I'm stalking her on her stories. So I already know something's up. So the message that she pretty much sends me is very cryptic. And I'm like, do you have something that you wanna tell me? What was going on?

I maybe met someone. No, I did. I met an amazing man, um, who again exceeds everything I ever thought I would ever have in a relationship, in a, in a partner, probably the healthiest, most loving relationship I've ever been in. How old was I when I met him? I think 46, 47, I don't know. And like at that point, like I, I truly was, I was okay, like being alone. I was okay not being in a relationship. I was just I was okay just being me and a mom and a business owner and all the things. Like all of that was like, it was good. Like life was good, right? Um, and then he kind of swooped in and now we're getting married. Yes.

She's not just getting married. The dude proposed to her and I, I'm gonna go back a little bit. Like if you're like, oh, this doesn't actually happen, it does. On a lake in Italy. Lake Como.

On a boat.

Lake Como. Oh, George Clooney's lake. That's, that's fine. That's fine.

Yeah.

On, on this beautiful boat, like the wooden boat from the movies. And yet there's still like the same things that you described in your business. You and I, through the, the relationship, have talked about there's times where you're like, is this real? Like, is, is this, you know, and there's this aspect of Still committing to the internal and the inner work and the loving yourself and knowing that you deserve for this or something better.

Oh, 'cause I tried to self-sabotage it many times and I had to like go slow. I mean, I was still kind of like healing from the breakup too when I first met him. Um, but it like, I definitely, we, we laugh about it all the time. Like I tried to like kick him to the curb many times 'cause I didn't think I deserved him. And I had to go back to my own inner work to being like, oh wait, I I do deserve this. Like, this is, this is real and like I can trust it and I can trust myself and it all, it's all connected with business too. It's, it's wild.

Yes. And so I'm gonna ask you that question in a second, your version of the yes and, but right now what I know is that there's somebody that's listening to this podcast who is exactly where you were, either still in the job or still in the relationship, still managing everyone else's needs, still waiting for the right time. What do you wanna say to her? And I mean, like, actually speak it to her, not the cleaned up version, not the curated version, like through the speaker system.

So if I was speaking to myself, I'm gonna pretend I'm, I'm talking to, to Lisa of like 10 years ago, right? Really lost, really confused. We'll, we'll start with like, if I didn't know if I wanted to stay or go in my relationship, I was I was hurting. I was in a really bad place, 'cause I was the one who decided to end my marriage, just so we're all clear. Not from a place of like, I didn't love him. I just, I wasn't happy. And I actually truly didn't think I deserved to be happy. And I had to get really honest with myself of like, how do I wanna be loved for the rest of my life? Is this it? Is this— And every time I would ask myself that, I would look at myself and I'd be like, this isn't it. Like, this isn't it. And I, If I could give you one piece of advice, it's like that, that inner turmoil that you are feeling, get real curious about it. Like, what's it, what's it want you to know? What does your heart want you to know? And trust that because there is no, like, wait, the reason people get so stuck and they stay, and the reason I got so stuck and I stayed, there's so much noise. Society, your family, your friends, all of it.

Mm-hmm.

What, what you think about yourself, the judgment, all of it. If you let go of all of that and you just listen to your heart, she'll guide you in life, relationship, business, all of it. Just trust your heart and like, and go from there.

Okay. Chef's kiss. And final question. Lisa, for the time being, Miller, What is your definition of a yes and life?

Ooh. Yes to, to living a life that feels true and authentic to you and making a shit ton of money and being really happy.

Louder for the people at home.

Whatever that looks like to you.

Yes. We're 100%. We're 100% here for the F.U. money, the freedom, the permission. Yes, yes, yes.

I love it. Mm-hmm.

I love you. I know I'm gonna see you next weekend.

Yes, yes, yes, and.

Yes, and, you know, like just, just knowing that, well, I haven't gotten a wedding invite yet, but knowing that—

I haven't planned my wedding yet, so don't worry. It hasn't, that hasn't happened yet.

I didn't even get to, I don't think I've told anybody this. Um, I have a client that, you know, I'm not a therapist anymore, so I worked with both the, the The man and the woman in the couple. And they came on to one of our, our client sessions and they said, Bunny, we have something to ask you. And I was like, what, what is, what is this? Like, am I getting proposed to? And they did. They asked me to officiate their wedding.

Oh, I love that. Did you do it?

I, I'm doing it next year. I was like, can I do that?

Yeah. So yeah, you just gotta get like ordained on like the computer. It's like, I don't think it's very hard.

I know, I already, I got my little certification there, but I just—

I love that.

I felt like that was just such a, such a profound— getting your message, getting your text. Thank you for the courage and the bravery to send that because, you know, that's something that I save and hold close to my heart to remind me on—

You deserve it.

Thank you. I receive that. And to remind me on the days that don't feel like today. You know, absolutely.

100%. Yeah. 'Cause, 'cause we all have them. Even like we, when we know we're amazing and so good at what we do, we all have days where we're like, maybe I'm not. Right? Like, oh no. Like maybe, maybe it's all gonna fall apart. And like, that's not true. But we, like, we all have days like that.

Well, to have clients that invite you to their wedding is something that, like, even when I was a therapist, as a therapist, obviously I can't go, but like, It's like to be in a relationship that somebody feels that profound that they're gonna invite you to one of the most important parts, days of their lives. Yeah.

It's one of my favorite things.

Like your, your work matters.

Yeah. Yeah. I get, I get wedding invites. I get people like when they're, you know, um, have like another kid and they like, they send me pictures and I'm like, oh, like. Like that all happened because like they trusted me to, to go in deep with them to get them to a place that makes them happy. And it, oh, it's so good.

It's so good. That's so good. Okay. Because you're so good, individuals who are going to listen to this episode and then they 100% want to be a part of your world and want to follow you and want to connect with you. What's the best way to do that?

Um, well, you can find me on Instagram or Facebook. I'm @lisamiller.coach. Send me a DM, say hello, tell me you found me on here. You can check out my website. I don't, I think you can maybe send me an email from there. I don't know. Um, but I think the easiest way is just go to Instagram or Facebook and all the, all the links are right there.

We'll have an offline conversation about the website and all of that.

What do you mean?

You know, like my website, we're gonna business coach around that.

Oh, okay. Sorry. Should I tell them what my website is? I, I don't even know what it is. I think it's like clarity.lisamiller. relationshipcoach.com. It's really long and silly. It needs to change.

We're gonna say that it's in the show notes.

Okay.

We're not gonna edit this part out because this is real, real. Is like, I also want you guys to know, I'm not gonna give you the exact numbers cuz you don't need to know the exact numbers, but from zero clients and zero revenue to where she's at now, and she doesn't know her website. Like you, you don't have an excuse to not be successful, right? Like you don't have to have all of your shit together. You get to build it and scale it as it supports you. And so go to her Instagram, lisamella.coach, go to her bio, send her a message, you know, all of those things. And Lisa, thank you so much for being here and doing this episode.

I love you. I love you. I love you. All right.

We're going to continue this little love fest offline. However, everything that you need is in the show notes, the link to Lisa's Instagram, Maybe with a link to her website. Go check the show notes. We'll see. We want to thank you for being here and for staying for the whole entire episode. So because I know that you absolutely enjoyed this and what you learned from it, I want to hear from you. Lisa wants to hear from you. So make sure that you are subscribing to the show, that you are liking the show, leave a review. It means the world to us. And you'll also be the first one to get a notification when the new episode drops. Then do me a favor, go onto Instagram and tag me, tag Lisa with your takeaway, because that, like, those are just like little gifts for me and for Lisa, as well as just like her list of 10 individual or 10 things that she's manifesting. You're putting more energy into that takeaway. And of course, if you want to go deeper with Lisa, if something that she said today moved something in you, which I know it did, you can go find her on Instagram @lisamiller.coach. And the link to work with her is in the show notes, so go look at that. And wherever you took us, wherever this is landing for you, you are meant to be here. This is your version as you build your Yes And life and your Yes And business. This is just the beginning. Stay in touch. I'd love to hear from you, and I will see you on the next episode of the Yes And Podcast. Bye.