How To Look Extremely Confident (Even If You’re Quiet)

Keanu Reeves has become the Internet's crush, whether he knows it or not. And now you've been dubbed the Internet's boyfriend. How do we feel about that?

I've been what?

Normally on the channel, we cover extroverted.

Celebrities who charm in larger, obvious ways.

But what is amazing about Keanu, aside from the fact that he's 54 and looks 34, is that he is massively popular in spite of his reclusivity and more introverted nature. So in this video, we're going to explore why Keanu is so popular while you learn to exude incredible charisma as an introvert or even just someone who is quieter or a bit shy. First off, Keanu often directs and redirects praise towards others. When receiving awards, he spends a tremendous amount of time talking about the contributions of the people around him.

I am not here without working with such talented artists and people, Erwin. Without all of what you did for me, I would not be here. So thank you. I am forever grateful.

One reporter even jokes about how bad Keanu is at taking compliments, to which he immediately launches into spreading the praise. Again, you can't take a compliment, can you?

It was cool. I mean, to work with Angelica Houston and Halle Berry. Mark Dacasque.

Now, sometimes there's no one around to redirect praise towards. So when a question arises that implies some sort of admirable trait, Keanu tends to deflect with humor. Like in this case, what is your.

Secret for always staying down to earth? Well, I mean, gravity.

To be clear, there is no such.

Thing as being too humble.

But sometimes low self esteem can mask itself as humility, and that makes it impossible for someone to sit in pride at their accomplishments. As C.S. lewis said, true humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less. The most charismatic thing to do, if you'd rather not be in the limelight for praise isn't to duck compliments entirely or to clam up when you're in that position. Instead, give a heartfelt thank you, show the complimenter that you appreciate their words, and then redirect towards others that helped. In that case, it's not about lowering yourself. Instead, it's about elevating others. The second thing that you'll likely notice about Keanu is his Zen like presence. Like many introverts, he speaks in quiet, calming tones in parabellum.

Part of the way that we've expanded is it's multiple people, more multiple people.

Sometimes this more calm type will find it hard to hold the attention of a High energy group. The good news is that you can sometimes use this to your advantage without changing your style. And you can do that by making the content of what you are saying mismatch that laid back style. And you do this for humorous effect. So deliver a dramatic punchline in a really calm tone like this.

What does that mean?

To do your action as opposed to your stunt.

Okay, so I'll do some fight scenes and then John Wick will get hit by a car. And that's Jackson Spidell.

This calm attitude isn't going to exude charisma on its own though. As we saw with Sophie Turner, moments of punctuated enthusiasm are often incredibly captivating when coming from a more laidb introverted individual. A word or two in a louder tone can go a long way towards rehooking an audience that isn't paying full attention.

Watch how Keanu does it. Does that not make you nervous at all?

No, it's a movie, but the horse.

But perhaps Keanu's most effective tool for making his calm demeanor charismatic instead of wallflowery and one that you should definitely take are his enthusiastic hand motions. When he's interested in the topic he's speaking about, he gesticulates like crazy. He goes big, he goes small, and he sometimes rocks between the two.

It might have been a leaking passing something at a something something in Sydney. Great to see you. Nice to see you.

One particular motion that is a favorite of Keanu is this little hand rub. And he does this before going into a story that gives the impression that whatever's coming next is going to be really juicy. It's a nice little trick to get people to listen to stories. If you don't have that booming extroverted nature when you start. Now, I have to say, technically, from a pure public speaking perspective, not everything that Keanu does is ideal. For instance, check out clip where Keanu speaks without looking Steven in the eye.

You know, I worked with a second generation horse master, Ted Griffith and his.

Family, and long periods of unsustained eye contact tend to break rapport when you're in conversation. So I don't advise doing this purposely, but it was actually this clip that unlocked one of the most interesting things I saw in Keanu. As I looked back over other interviews, I saw that he sometimes goes into longer stretches without looking the interviewer in the eye. And when he does so, he usually looks down and to the right. Now I have to pause here to tell you little bit about nlp. According to nlp, there are three primary modalities in which we represent the world in our own heads. There's visual, like when you see an image in your head, audio, hearing, music and kinesthetic remembering the feel of the wind on your face, for instance. And people tend to prefer using one of these most of the time. So when you're in a visual mode, you may talk faster. You're seeing pictures, after all, communicate in imagery and say things like, I see your point rather than I hear you or I feel you. When you're in an audial mode, you tend to think in words. You'll be more likely to engage in prolonged conversation and will be more sensitive to loud or jarring noises. But when you watch Keanu tell stories, it's clear that he is demonstrating the more rare third modality kinesthetic. He's experiencing the story through how it felt more than how it looked or how it sounded. Now, it also matches kinesthetic types in that he speaks more slowly, gesticulates often, and often words don't quite communicate what he wants to say. Which brings us back to the last indicator of Keanu's type and the one that I mentioned. First, his eyes. According to nlp, the area that your eyes dart to when you're thinking is indicative of the mode that you are currently in. And down to the right is most commonly associated with, you guessed it, the kinesthetic modality. Now, I bring all of this up for two main reasons. First off, because a high level communicator can identify the style of the people around them and adjust their own to match that preferred style. So paying attention to indicators is critical. And if you're interested, we can cover it in depth in another video. But secondly, Keanu is so likable, partially because he embraces his kinesthetic nature, which leads him to spending time doing what he loves. He's passionate about motorcycles, he loves to do his own stunts, and even the feel of vinyl records is important to him.

There's so many things in life we're losing a kind of materiality, a haptic quality, a contact.

So if you're interested, we can make a whole video on identifying people's primary modality. But for the purpose of this video, when you see that someone is heavily kinesthetic, spend more one on one time with them while doing an activity. It's more effective than simply relying on conversation, even if fewer words are being exchanged. Likewise, if you're a kinesthetic type and you're looking to make more friends, avoid going to dinners or cocktail parties or bars or clubs. Instead, participate in Groups that make some kind of activity the focal point around which socializing can occur. Now, that's enough of a digression for now. We've arrived at what I think is the most important thing that makes Kian Keanu, and that is his character. I don't obviously know the guy, but by all accounts from his colleagues, he's a very generous person. For instance, he did this for the cast of the Matrix Reloaded. He managed to secure 12 custom Harley Davisons for each of the guys and kind of surprised the whole crew with that. That may not impress you because Keanu does have a lot of money, but what is certainly impressive is his generosity with his time. His interactions with fans appear unrushed.

Hello, Jackie. Good night.

She's nervous.

We are.

I'm so nervous.

Jackie. Come on. Oh, my God.

And he was the only person to.

Stop on the side of the road.

And help Octavia Spencer when her car broke down. He didn't know who she was. He just decided to pull over and push her broken down car as other people sped past.

My car broke down at the middle of the crazy intersection at Sunset and till Keanu Reeves. Oh, we did. I was gonna have him, you know, get in, and I was gonna push it, and he was like, no, no, I'm gonna push you. And I. He's gonna touch my car.

And that's not to mention all the other fun Internet anecdotes about Keanu, like the time that he hung out with a homeless guy or entertained passengers on a flight after they had to make an emergency landing and take a van to their destination through Bakersfield.

Its population is around 380,000, making it the 9th most populous city in California and the 52nd most populous city in the nation.

I think the reason that most people are not this open is not because they don't know how to be, but because they're scared. Connecting with strangers, especially those who want or need something from you, can be scary. But despite having more people that would love to absorb his time, money, and energy than almost anyone, Keanu has more compassion than almost anyone. Let's be real. Most people don't stop to help the person in the broken down car or to hang out with the homeless. And it's that willingness to give that makes him someone to admire, even when his charisma or public speaking isn't pitch perfect. So if you want to start developing character like this, if you want to be more giving, realize that Keanu is able to do this in large part because he has defined what doesn't matter. He doesn't have any social media, nor does he go to socialite parties, nor does he seem to worry about stuff. Puppies bite his shoes in this next clip and rather than protect his fancy things, he just goes with the flow.

Say hi, communicate. All right, we're good and you're eating my shoelace. Okay? Go ahead, eat my shoelace.

If you're interested in developing more of this kind of character, in being more compassionate, more generous, and generally happier when life throws you curveballs, you too will have to define what does not matter to you. You can't prioritize everything. The good news is that if you do decide to let go of caring about your name brand stacked wardrobe or your follower count or your income relative to your peers, you free up space for other things, for the things that tend to make people truly happy. Your relationships, the work that you are passionate about and giving back. Now if you do that, you of yourself less without thinking less of yourself. And then you too may start dropping Zen gems like Keanu.

What do you think happens when we die, Keanu Reeves?

I know that the ones who love us will miss us.

Now, as I was making this video.

I saw that PewDiePie also did one on Keanu and it ended like so.

In the spirit of Keanu Reeves and making this video, I wanted to donate all the profit that this video makes to the Leukemia Research Foundation.

And reflecting on that and spending all week researching Keanu's generosity and kindness, I was inspired to do something that I've been saving up for for a good while. The plan was for this to be a birthday event in October, but KEANU and then PewDiePie convinced me to not wait. So in honor of Keanu's generosity And to echo PewDiePie's donation, we are going to be donating $100,000 to Charity Water. And it would mean the world to us if you joined us in making a contribution as well. Now, to be clear, my donation is only possible due if you've watched our videos or joined Charisma University. You are the reason that Charisma on Command exists. Like Keanu says, we are not here at all without our fans. And it is 100% thanks to all of you that over 3,000 people will have their lives transformed by Getting Access to Clean Water's entire mission is to get clean water to people who don't have access to it. People who might be walking miles just to have drinking water for their day who are getting sick and even dying from contaminations in dirty water. So to make a den and to do something good, and I set up a campaign@charitywater.org Charisma the first hundred thousand dollars is already in there. And if you're feeling inspired by Keanu or PewDiePie or us or the people whose lives you will change, please consider donating. $30 gives one person access to clean water for roughly 10 years.

But truly, any amount makes a difference. And quite frankly, caring enough to give.

Anything is a sign that the world is in good hands. Again, thank you. I cannot believe that we have arrived at a point where a donation of this size is even fathomable for us. I never thought this would be possible, and we owe it all to you. We're very excited to pay it forward. I hope that you guys have enjoyed this video. I'll see you in the next one.