How To Make Almost Anyone Like You

Jamie Foxx is insanely charismatic. Some people mistakenly think he's just an over the top comedian because of jokes like this one.

I did pass one time, and the next morning I got out of bed like, oh, my God.

While he does use physical comedy at times, Jamie is a magnetic storyteller and amazing conversationalist. He can even lead a conversation while spending most of it just listening and asking the right questions. So today we're going to break down a few of Jamie's habits and how you can use these habits to become funnier, more. More magnetic, and a more likable listener. If you can become even one of those three things, people will love being around you.

I mean. I mean, I'm taken aback by these stories, man. Honestly, I feel like I should pay you for sitting here listening to this.

The first thing Jamie does in most conversations is set a playful tone from the start. For example, most guests coming onto Jimmy Kimmel live just walk out, wave to the audience, and take a seat. Instead, Jamie comes in high energy and is immediately striking goofy poses, getting people to do the wave and joking with the audience.

The wave is, you love that the lady in the front said, come on, come on, J. Give me some of that.

This doesn't mean to try to get the wave started every time you enter a party, but most people enter meetings or social gatherings nervous, which causes them to be low energy, so they keep their voices quiet and their gestures small. Then they struggle when they suddenly see someone they want to make a good impression on. If instead you make a point to be a bit louder and higher energy from the moment you walk in, you'll find it's much easier to get social momentum and feel outgoing. If you want to start small, try building the habit of smiling every time you enter a new room. That said, don't force yourself to be goofy the whole time. Part of what makes Jamie charismatic is his ability to switch gears and be genuine when the moment calls for it.

How are you doing? How's your life going? How are you doing? I'm doing well, thank you. I'm doing very well. I know I'm breaking protocol, but I saw something about you and your kid. It was fantastic. I just got. I said when I see you in person. Oh, thank you. Thank you. He's doing very well.

Once Jamie sees that genuine moment is well received and Jimmy understands that he means it, he goes back to cracking jokes.

He's doing great, by the way. People keep. I feel weird because, you know, it makes you feel weird because when I did it, you Went, oh goodness. Yeah, I gotta be serious.

So to start, let's go over some quick, easy ways you can get people laughing. One of Jamie's go to ways to get a laugh is by teasing himself. As a quick example, watch his reaction after Ellen shows a clip of him doing pull ups and says his body is impressive.

You know, brothers don't do legs. Really? No, no, no. Like we're big at the top and sort of small at the bottom. Like, I could beat you up but I can't chase you because I'm like this.

It's worth noting while he is teasing himself that Byrne has no heat. No one cares if he has small legs. So it's not actually something that puts him down. Here's another example from when he met NBA player Draymond Green.

I ran into Draymond Green. Come on, man. Yeah, right in the back. Yeah, he was gonna be mad when he hears all of this. You mean like, why? For me? I said, what's up, Draymond? He said, what's up, Fox? How you feeling?

There's zero shame in being smaller than an NBA forward. So he's making fun of himself but not actually putting himself down. Again, a burn with no heat. What you can and can't tease about yourself is subjective. And it comes down to being honest with yourself about what areas you're comfortable and what areas you're a bit insecure. For instance, a lot of people are insecure about being out of shape. But even when he's not in top form, Jamie has no problem making a joke like this.

You got the body, right? You didn't do like me, like, I have a spank on, right? See, you didn't spank it out. See, this is all spank muscles.

Teasing yourself like that makes people laugh and it shows confidence. That said, even if you're the one that initiates the joke, if people are laughing at something you're insecure about, there's a risk it's going to bother you. Especially because it also invites other people to tease you for the same thing. So to start, only tease areas that aren't major insecurities. You can combine this with another habit Jamie does incredibly well, which is storytelling. Jamie is a magnetic storyteller. He's able to tell stories that make you laugh or that captivate you and hit you emotionally. One thing you'll notice about Jamie is the way he tells stories really takes you through the experience with him. Two things create that feeling. He tells present tense stories with a variety of voices. For example, listen to him Tell the story of his first audition with Tom Cruise.

Tom Cruise reads his line, but it was like this. So I thought he lost his place because I couldn't hear him. So I said, we right here. He says, I know I said the line. I'm waiting on you. I'm like, oh.

And again, you saw? He exaggerates to his detriment at the end to get a laugh. One other thing to notice as he gets into his stories, Jamie smiles with his eyes and speaks through a smile, which primes people to smile and laugh with him. If you've ever seen someone tell the same joke as you but get a bigger laugh. This or speaking louder was probably why. Here's another example. Watch for present tense. A variety of voices and smile priming.

Like, you know, I'm 49. So I was DJing at this club and these girls was about to DJ booth, and they were just so young. Like I said, well, how old are you? I'm 22. How old are you? I'm 23. And oh, my God, she's ancient. She's 27. I'm like, wow. Yeah.

Also notice he pauses at his punchline before continuing.

The girl asked me how old I was 49. Oh, my God, can't you die from 49? Come on, girls, let's pray he has 49.

Those five elements make up the bulk of Jamie's funny stories. The best part is you don't even have to master all five to become a magnetic storyteller. Pick one or two to focus on. To start, you'll notice your stories get a better reaction almost instantly. Jamie relies on the power of pauses even more when he's telling serious stories. He does this by using a special kind of pause, a cliffhanger pause. Sometimes it's only half a second, but it grabs your attention. Here's a quick because when we were nominated for the Oscars, most people pause at the end of their sentences. Instead, Jamie pauses at a point that's clearly mid sentence. This creates a moment of curiosity and triggers the human desire to know how things end. Here's a longer example. This is Jamie describing how powerful it was to watch Michael B. Jordan give his final speech in just mercy, you.

Finished that speech, and what you didn't see behind you was.

See, Aren't you at least a little curious what was behind him?

The extras in this courtroom gave you a standing ovation.

The fear people have with pausing is that they'll get cut off. But there's a solution to that potential problem. In this next clip, watch how Jamie uses his hand to show he isn't done speaking, Even through this incredibly long emotional pause for context, he's sharing his experience after his father was sentenced to jail for seven years.

I said, I told my pops I can't come see you.

By keeping your hand up in the gesture you were using while speaking, you make it clear you aren't finished.

But I wrote him. I wrote him a letter. I said, hey, you know, things have gotten good for me. When you get out, I save your life.

So if you're ever speaking and want to make sure you maintain people's attention while you pause, keep your hand gesture up until you continue. So far we've talked about how to be an amazing conversationalist while doing most of the talking. But there's another way to have people love speaking with you, which is by being a likable listener. Jamie follows the standard listening advice, like making eye contact and facing his body towards you. But he has another habit beyond that that makes him someone that people really enjoy talking to. He asks talk about questions. Here's an example.

In front of and behind the camera, you are absolutely amazing. Talk about the birth of just mercy. How did that come about?

Michael went on to answer that question for four minutes straight. There's a few good rules for getting people to enjoy talking to you. Get them talking about things they're excited about or are proud of, especially things that other people don't often ask about. The goal is to ask a question that someone is genuinely excited to answer, then use the phrase talk about to elicit a more thoughtful response. It's a phrase Jamie uses often.

Talk about what it means to be positive to everybody, but talk about the significance of the way.

Conversation can feel stilted or awkward if you ask a lot of questions that can be answered with one word. Instead, ask open ended questions. Specifically ones that allow people to speak at length about things they care about. Now, one thing I noticed in a few comments recently is that people aren't quite sure how to implement everything from our videos, which makes sense. It's a lot to work on at once. If becoming more charismatic is a goal of yours, you should check out Charisma University. It's a step by step 30 day program we made so you know exactly what to do and when. You're guaranteed to feel way more confident and charismatic and and if for whatever reason you don't, then you can get a full refund just by pushing a button inside the course. Thousands of people have gone through Charisma University so far and had great results. Here's what just a few of them have said. Thank you. You changed my life. It's so much easier for me to connect with people. All of my relationships have improved and I am able to make new friends anywhere in any situation. I never expected such remarkable outcomes from a simple online routine. This course completely changed my mindset on how to approach people and think about myself. It has undoubtedly made a significant impact on my life. Everything in my life has improved, from loving myself and others more to creating and developing amazing external relationships. There's so much joy in my life and CU has been a huge reason for it. If you're interested in a 30 day program to become more confident and more charismatic, you can click the link on screen now or in the description below. Either way, I hope you enjoyed today's video and I'll see you in the next one. Satisfaction.