How To Never Be Boring In Conversation

Yeah. Do you blow the mouth organ? Do you blow the mouth organ? How'd you think I got this job?

He's so damn funny. Alright guys, welcome. Today we have one of the most charismatic people in the world that we're gonna be looking at. And that person is Craig Ferguson. He had the Late Late show before James Corden and he was exceptional because every other talk show host even today has this thing called a pre interview. They would sit down and they would plan out their questions and the jokes are often rehearsed and while there's some time for spont, it's minimal. Craig at the beginning of every show would rip up the pre interview questions and basically ad lib and his confidence to trust in his own ability to connect with anyone without knowing ton about them. It was legendary. And he would often make for some of the best interviews. So what we're gonna do today is look at that and what we can learn from him when bringing this sort of idea of spontaneity to our own conversations in our life.

Man, I hate lawyers. Fake and civil. I do, man. You're not a lawyer, are you? Before you were an actress, you didn't sneak in a bit of law, did you? What's in that? What's in this confidence?

I mean, that's everything. He's just got a very different agenda than most people do when they're interacting, which is to exchange information and look cool. His job out there, and he feels it clearly is to be playful, have fun and make the other person comfortable.

Is it there's. Yeah, pomegranate. They got one of them. There's one of them that speak. Oh, look at this is a little bit like your name. Kiwan. Oh, what's a kiwano? It's a very enigmatic fruit, man. People don't really know much about it. I mean it's very popular and the girls enjoy it, but nobody knows.

Dude, he's so good. One of the things that you'll see here, and you can apply this to your own life as well, is that he has an extremely low filter on what he says. So he often starts off what becomes a really funny joke with just some sort of sidelong thing that pops into his head. Oh, that's kind of like your name. Kiwi Kiwano. And then this is another principle which he applies so well. He is not literal with probably more than 50% of the questions that the guests might ask of him. So while he'll sometimes say, hey, where are you from? And they can exchange literal information, he recognizes that in these interviews and in a lot of the first impressions that you're going to be making on anyone in your life, literal information exchange is not the most important piece. What you're trying to do early in an interaction is enjoy yourself, is laugh. And by answering, not literally to a lot of the things that are asked, what kind of fruit is that? And instead talking about Keanu. It's. It's excellent. And then he goes on even further to compliment him while cracking a joke. So we've often talked about how I have so much to say about Craig. I can't handle it. We've often talked in our videos how you want the subtext of your jokes to be complimentary. And so he takes this and says, this is something that the girls like. Very popular. Not a lot of people know a ton about it. This is very, very kind of a subtext. And it's. It's. It's awesome.

What kind of doctors? Internal medicine. So all her work is done indoors. What does that mean? Internal medicine?

So this, this is actually a great joke format, which is just to purposely misinterpret what is being said. Purposefully. Misinterpreting oftentimes makes for incredible funny little moments like this.

I don't think I'd have made a good doctor, although I always would have liked it because I think I've got quite good hair, you know, for a doctor hair. Kind of like, can I help you?

I have no idea what you're doing.

Well, you know, I've got this. Yeah, yeah, I know. I think I've got good doctor hair. So I could come in and my hair inspires confidence in people so that they could.

There's nothing about you that would inspire.

That kind of confidence. Oh, come on.

So he doesn't bail on the joke either. This is important. He tells a joke, he doesn't get the laugh there. And without rushing it, he continues. So this is tough to emulate, but he is simultaneously not reaction seeking in the sense that he, oh, I didn't get my laugh. I have to push, push, push right now. But he doesn't bail on the joke. It's his level of comfort with whatever people say in response and his willingness to remain in the present moment, responding spontaneously. That is so attractive. It's tough to step into this, especially if you're in a situation where you're feeling a bit uncomfortable, but it is so damn attractive.

You have harmonicas. Yeah. Do you blow the mouth, Morgan? I do you blow the mouth, Morgan? How'd you think I Go this job.

So one thing we're not getting that he's very good at is callback humor. And so he manages to stay present with what's being said while having a seemingly sort of a Rolodex in the back of his head of beats and topics that they've touched on. If you watch the full and it's worth your time, him and Robin Williams is comedic masterclass, both of them. It's a little bit high energy for normal interaction, but the principles in there are amazing. If you want to check that out. Really, really cool.

Nice.

It's nice.

It is nice touch.

Ah, here he is on.

Thank you.

That's nice.

I work out. I work out. Yeah, a little bit. Only this arm though. But you know what? I like this side and I'm like, ah. You know what I like about what you just did is that. What? What? No, go to touch my arm. See what I'll do. You flexed a little bit. Yeah. You did not flex at all. Touch my stomach. Touch my stomach. You didn't care what this felt like. No. That's a man secure in his own manliness. Yeah. And also that was me flexing.

So one way to accept a compliment is with the gracious thank you. And that is a perfect way to accept the compliment. Another way is when somebody compliments you to playfully self deprecate. So you're not saying, no, I'm an idiot, actually, I'm really weak. You are making a joke of the compliment, which is exactly what he does here because clearly he doesn't work out just one arm. So that's one way you can just go with thank you sincerely. Totally works. Or you can accept the compliment but playfully disarm it. And this is, this is exactly what he's doing here.

Welcome, welcome, Moon. Welcome to the show. Hi. How very nice to meet you. And may I compliment you on your amazing shoes.

He's always complimentary and he says the same thing. He'll compliment either their dress or the way that they look. And he does it with guys too, that they've got a good sense of style, that they're looking great. He's very, very giving with compliments.

That's really something you got going on there. I notice a shoe from time to.

Time and it's enthusiastic, even if a bit over the top. His enthusiasm is what connects here.

That's an amazing shoe. Is that the Roman sandal they're calling that?

This is sort of dominatrix.

Yeah. Oh, I knew I'd seen it somewhere.

Hey, the technical damn he's quick. The funniest people, with rare exception, have certain joke types and joke principles that they lean on heavily and so it makes them look completely spontaneous. And even though there's only a handful, maybe a dozen of types of jokes that they just reference over and over and over again. What's up guys? Charlie from the future here. So I hope that you have enjoyed this video. If you would like a proper breakdown on Cray, go ahead, let me know in the comments. I know he's not super popular in the news right now, but he truly is a charismatic wonder. So I hope that you guys have enjoyed this video. If you would like more on this, you might want to check out our course, Charisma University. So Charisma University is a 30 day program that is all about maximizing your confidence and your charisma so that you can turn it on in the moments when you need it the most. Now, if you're like me during this lockdown period, you probably haven't been socializing too much. So this can be an excellent way to get back into the world on the right foot. This course covers lots of important things in your interactions, whether it's in the working world or with your friends. But it starts with first impressions, right? How do you make an impression on someone such that they remember you for a long time to come over all the other people that they might meet? We go into confidence. How do you feel confident around superiors, people who might make you nervous right now? Then we go into how to have a conversation so that it flows and you're not going going, oh my God, what do I say next? We go into body language. We go into how to be a leader. We cover all of these skills in 30 days with just 20 minutes a day. Because the course really is built around doing one small action every single day, such that you're building habits that become unthinking by the end of the course. So if you're interested in checking it out, you can do so with the link below. It does come with a 60 day money back guarantee and that means that you can actually go through this 30 day course twice before you decide. If it's not for you, you just let us know and we give you every single penny.

Make sure.

So if you're interested in Charisma University, you want to go deeper into this stuff and apply it in your own life, I highly recommend you click the link below. Now this is just one little addendum for those of you guys who have been asking where I have been. I have been allowing Ben to take over the breakdowns for a while. Creatively, I feel like I've said a lot of what I have to say, so I wanted to step away from the channel a little bit. I've also been really interested in this other course that we're working on, Emotional Mastery. I'm developing the content for that right now. But I'm alive, I'm well, I'm happy. I'm doing great. I appreciate the concern. And I will be back on the channel once I wrap up with this other project, which is basically filming everything for Emotional Mastery. Either way, hope that you guys are great. See you soon.

Sam.