🔴LIVE: Charisma On Command - Q&A

Many memes going live. I think we're live. Yes. It worked Just in time for two o'. Clock. What's up, guys? I hope there's not too many of you that have been waiting. I've been trying to get this thumbnail thing to work out. Hello, Hello. What's up everybody? If you guys have questions, I'm going to be answering your questions. Is there a description? Man, I did not do a good job on this, technology wise. Hello, everybody. So I'm here. I'm going to be answering your questions. I'm sure that they will start to come in pretty. What's up everybody? Yo, yo. Let me know where y' all are from. I'm gonna go back and read these. I promise right now they're gonna roll in pretty quick. 568 people. Holy cow. Greetings from Germany. So if you guys have any questions for me, I have a fake smile faking it the whole time. If you guys want to ask any questions, let me know. I'm gonna go through this couple things that I wanted to say and I will try. I have. I'm here with Jess. Jess be is gonna going to help me with the questions. I noticed you. Please notice me. So number one, first thing, so what's going on with Charisma on Command Right now? We're going to be doing more Vlog style videos if this goes well and if you guys like this, more Q&As that are live. We also. Game of Thrones is coming back. I'm super excited for that. Going to be doing lots of Game of Thrones breakdowns. Tywin Lannister. Whatever goes on in the new season I am excited for. We've got our animator who is currently working on a video that I just sent to him. So hopefully we can do that. And also one thing that I've never done in the past is meetups. So I'm going to VidCon this year, which is going to be June 21st to 25th in Anaheim, if you haven't already seen it. And I put in for an officially sponsored meetup there. So I'm actually going to turn the comments. I'll let them roll in. So I'm putting in for an officially sponsored meetup there and if we get that, that's what we're going to do. So if you guys want to come out to VidCon, I'll let you know on the channel if they do do it. Either way, I'm going to be there hanging out. If you guys want to just say hi or get a bite to eat or whatever it is that people do at Vidcon. I've never been. So let me know. So can you help me? I'm here with Jess. Just. You can say hi.

Hi.

Hi. Let me know what questions are good. Can you go through those and just let me know if there's any good ones coming in? I saw one as I was doing it that was about my background. Do I speak Portuguese? Portuguesh Espanol. Portugal. Holy crap.

So the way that you do this is you click and you can scroll through here.

Ah, very nice.

Yes. And you can go back and see all these different comments.

I'm learning the tech side of things, guys. Sorry for covering the camera. Cool. Alright. So I saw that somebody had asked El falo Portuguese. So first off, how do you accept a compliment? I think the simplest way is to say thank you. When a lot of people are complimented, one of the first things that they do is they want to act like it happens to them all the time. So they tend to be, ah, it's no big deal. People tend to appreciate if you go over the top with expressing that it's nice when you are complimented. So you can say thank you. That's so kind of you. What tends to bother people is when you go over humble and allow it to look like the compliment has fallen on deaf ears. So I tend to. I tend to say thanks very much. That means a lot to me, if it truly does. Paraguay, we got everybody coming in here. This is amazing, guys. Right now I'm just stunned by how many comments are rolling in from all over the world. How to be convincing and persuasive. Kian. So I saw that one of you. Greetings from Denmark. Hold on. I don't want to ban you. Cancel. This is so difficult. Cancel.

Oh, here we go.

Here we go. How can I be more proactive? Germany. All right. Game of Thrones video. Better. You guys are all over. Play the guitar behind me. So my background story, which a lot of you guys don't know, I grew up and I was very shy throughout high school. Ben, who was going to be on these live streams with me, was my best friend in high school. And he and I. Too much of me on these screens. He and I were very good buddies in high school and we actually became friends because we were dating two girls who were friends with one another and we did not have relationships work out with those two women. But he and I remained best friends. He went to one college, I went to another. But we wound up speaking to each other the whole time. And one of the most common things that we would talk about was what was going on with friends, what was going on with girls that we were seeing. And we sort of started comparing notes on the people around us that were successful and the things that we wanted to be successful with. Ben, in particular, had one friend who was just vibrantly charismatic. I remember him. I wrote about him in the book, we'll call him Dustin. And he was the type of guy that everybody wanted to be around. And Ben became very good friends with him. I was friends with Ben, so I was kind of exposed to him. And I remember just being stunned that I would crack a joke, nobody would laugh, and this guy Dustin would crack a joke, and everybody in the room would laugh. So that was really kind of what started me getting interested on what is it that makes the difference between what makes one person more charismatic and another less so? Fast forward. I'm in college. I go abroad a couple times, and while I'm in Costa Rica, I have a chance to kind of reinvent myself. Because when I first got to college, I was very shy. I played a lot of FIFA. I hung out in a room. I had some good friends, but it was a very, very small social circle. So when I got to college, when I got to Costa Rica rather, I took the time to put myself outside of my own little box. And the way that I did that was by just playing dumb. I asked everybody for directions everywhere that I was going, even when I kind of knew my way around. And one of the things that that did was was get people talking to me, curious about where I was from, and got me into conversation in Spanish and in English. And that was really where I stepped outside of my shell, where I started talking to more strangers than I ever had before. And because it wasn't in my native language, I had to pay special attention to body language, to what made someone listen to someone else, even when I couldn't understand what they were saying. So I was listening to tonality. I was listening to body language or watching body language, rather than, you gonna play with this?

Turning up the volume.

I'll get the volume up. Cool. I don't know that that makes the microphone. I'll just speak louder. So anyways, graduate college, come back to work. I go first to grad school in the University of Virginia and then to work as a consultant in Washington, D.C. and I wasn't crazy in love with the job. It was a ton of nice people in the business, but just waking up and doing Microsoft Excel, PowerPoint and Access every day was not for me. So I was talking to Ben. Ben had gone into investment banking. He's the best friend, the other guy who runs Charisma on Command with me. And he said, why don't you just come up here? I kept trying to find a job in New York City, but I couldn't find one. It was really tough while I was living in Washington, D.C. to make something work in New York City. So after applying to a bunch of jobs, even taking one or two interviews, I couldn't make it happen. And I talked to a buddy. He's like, what you need to do now is just quit your job. You need to talk to your boss and say that you're not going to stay. So I remember thinking that that was kind of crazy, but also exactly what I wanted to do. So I went in, talked to the president of my company and said, listen, I'm really happy with how everyone is treating me, but quite frankly, the exact kind of work and the fact that I'm not surrounded by friends here in Washington D.C. and my best friend is in New York, makes me feel like the right thing for me to do is going to be to leave. So I understand if that means that you want to fire me, but if you don't, I'm happy to stay on. And I got really lucky. He wound up giving me a remote work arrangement in New York City. So I got to move in with my best friend Ben. And that was where we started doing this charisma on command. At the time was called Kick Ass Academy. And the first thing that we ever did was we took a couple of guys out, we went to a park, and we had a How to speak to women in a park class. Live with 10 guys. That was our first class. And then from there I wrote articles on the blog. And YouTube came years later. There's a much longer story and I can do it later, but I want to answer some more questions. So you got a good question for me. What is it?

Social anxiety.

What is the question about how to deal with social anxiety? Yes. Okay, so we got a question rolling. Let me know if you can the name next time and I'll shout them out. Question on how to deal with social anxiety. I just made a video on this and I think I'll quickly run you through it. And again, a lot of people pointed out that it was Tony Robbins who came up with this stuff. And I don't mean to take credit for his stuff. I just want to popularize it. It's the most effective technique to deal with any negative emotion. I'll run through really quickly what it is. First off, if you have social anxiety, it's because you associate more difficulty and pain to socializing than to not socializing. And somebody who doesn't have social anxiety associates more pleasure to going and socializing. What's up, Ev? Yeah, it's going to be on live, and I got my first super chat. That's Evan Carmichael, guys. He's got a great channel. He's an awesome dude, and he actually inspired me to do this. So shout out to you, Ev. Social anxiety. Anyway, back to where I was. If you're dealing with social anxiety, the best thing that you can do is go through a list. Write down, first, what is the benefit of having social anxiety? And it might sound crazy, but there is a benefit. The anxiety probably stops you from risking rejection. It probably stops you from getting turned down by other people. So write this on a piece of paper, the benefit that I get of social anxiety, and spend a minute on that. Second thing, go in and write the cost to me if I continue to let social anxiety drive my life and my decisions. Now take five minutes on that and really write in vivid detail how it's going to screw up your job prospects, how it's going to mess up your. Your dating life, how it's going to screw with your own mind and make you feel like you're not a valuable human. Like, make it hurt, right? This is really, really important. Third thing you want to do is write. If I can change my social anxiety to go back to be more excited to speak to people, what is the benefit that I'm going to get? What's the pleasure I'm going to see? Well, I might get a guy or a girl that I really like to be my boyfriend or girlfriend. I might get a new business opportunity that was previously closed off to. I'm going to feel like a king of the world because I'm stepping outside of myself and pushing myself to do things I'd never done before. Then what you do is you got your benefit, you've got your cost, and you've got your pleasure and all. I promise you, if you make this vivid, that cost hurt in your soul, and you make that pleasure really exciting to you, and you just go over it, you're going to find that in situations where you feel that social anxiety, all you have to do is come back to thinking about, what's the cost of this and what's the benefit if I shift my behavior here and you will Be motivated to change your emotion and your actions. So that's the most powerful way that I did a. I'm going to do more on this in the future.

Awesome.

We got a question.

Say thank you to Faisal Said.

Faisal Said. I don't know how to say your name, but thank you for that question. Any other cues?

We got more questions from Andrew. Can you make a video on how.

Money affects social interactions in various cultures? Actually, I'm not quite sure. So, Andrew. What's his last name? Andrew Jutta.

Andrew Jute.

Andrew Jute. How money affects social interactions in various cultures. I haven't done a ton of thinking about this, quite frankly. I know what I can say is people in positions of status and power certainly have an advantage and one of the things that it does if you are in a position of status and power is it skews the way that people respond to you. So they're going to be more forgiving of lack of charismatic conviction, tonality, body language. All those things will be obviously forgiven if you're in a position of power. So one thing to be happy with and one positive reframe if you don't have a lot of money or position of status is that you are getting honest feedback from the people around you in terms of your social skills because they're not trying to butter you up, they're not trying to. What's up from Spain? I want to give you a shout out. I saw that, that super chat in there. They're not trying to butter you up, they're not trying to make. They're not trying to get anything from you. They are truly concerned with your personality. So going to scroll through, hold on, I see a question here. How do you have friends if you were introverted and did not enjoy going out? So how to make friends if you're introverted? What I recommend, you don't necessarily have to go to a bar into any super loud place. But what you can do is meetup.com and this is still going to require you to step outside of yourself a little bit. But what it can give you is a group of people who have a similar interest to you. So I really Recommend going to meetup.com say you're an introvert, you like video games or whatever it is. Go ahead, check that out because that's going to give you people that have similar interests and easy conversational threads so that you don't have to feel like you're stuck without anything to say. Let me see.

How to earn.

Yo, what's up Derek.

How to earn the respect of people.

How to earn the respect of people.

Yeah, here we go.

Right here. Hold on.

Sorry, guys, for saying your names wrong.

Oh, ex girlfriend, yo. I want to do this for you guys real quick. Speaking of ex girlfriends, so what's the best way to start to stop thinking of my ex girlfriend? It's been six months, I'm still thinking about her all the time. Great question. I'm going to go back to what I said. I don't want to. This is, this is such a broad spanning tool that I want to go over it a couple times so that you can apply it to whatever it is in your life. I won't focus on this for the entire time. So the plain, the pain and pleasure principle with an ex girlfriend, if you missed it briefly, everything you do in your life is because of pain and pleasure. This is a Tony Robbins thing that I got. I don't mean to crib his stuff, but it's so, it's so, so powerful. So what I want you to do when you think about your ex girlfriend, write down what benefit do you get from being stuck about your ex girlfriend? And probably the benefit that you get is that you feel like there's still a chance that you feel like as long as you're thinking about her and don't let her go, she's not actually gone forever. Maybe you can make it come back to you. So go ahead, write that down. Second thing that you're going to do. Let me see. So the second thing that I want you to do is, is go ahead and write the cost of what is happening when you focus on your ex girlfriend. And chances are it's shutting you off from other people. It's making you feel pathetic, it's making you, your friends get tired of hearing about the same old stuff over and over again. Go in and make this part hurt. Write the cost down of dealing with your ex, of being obsessed with getting back with your ex girlfriend even after six months. And I want you to make it hurt, feel pathetic. That's that this is one time where it's okay to feel bad. Then what I want you to do is go and write the benefit that you'll get if you can shift your mindset to not being angry at your girlfriend, not spiting her, but just moving on, being excited. So if you're excited about what's to come in your life, well, you might meet someone that you like even more. Your friends are probably going to be proud of you for finally stepping through this difficult period in your life, you're going to feel not as pathetic anymore. You're going to feel excited for what stands to come and you're going to feel proud of yourself for overcoming a difficult challenge. So go through those things, focus on the difficult cost that you're dealing with. And then the positive thing that can come if you shift your mindset. And that's going to make your emotions change. It just takes a little bit, probably a couple of days maybe, honestly a week or two of repetition. And this will help, I promise you. How to make conversations not awkward with new people. You guys. So the more specific the question, I can help more, but I will try to answer these. How do you make conversations not awkward with new people? One of the things that I would recommend, generally speaking, is leaving more conversational ammunition out there. And this is something we talk about in our online courses. But everything that you, that you do when you're in conversation gives the other person something to say. Conversations do not evolve in a very direct fashion. They're often like trees and they grow out. And you mention that you grew up in Oklahoma and they say, oh, I grew up in Oklahoma, I was a Sooners fan. And all of a sudden you're talking about football. So what you want to do to not make conversation awkward is give more information about yourself than you probably think you ought to. And the reason is not because we're self centered. The reason is because we want to give that other person something to latch onto so we can, so that they can respond to it. And that conversation can go. For instance, I'm just going to give you a quick thing. If somebody asks you where you're from or what do you do, do not simply say, I'm from Philadelphia and I'm an accountant. What I would like you to do instead is elaborate on that. Alright, say I'm from Philadelphia. I actually grew up in the suburbs outside the city. But I love this city because there's just so much energy and it actually has one of my favorite sports teams right near my house that gives the other person so many things to latch onto, right? What is the sports team you like? What's the sport that you love? What is it about the vibrant city that you like better than the suburbs? If you do that with those early getting to know you questions, you're going to find that, sorry, I'm just reading these as I go. You're going to find that the other person has more to talk about and you guys can connect better. So that's just one tip to make conversations not so awkward. How do you deal with negative aspects of your personality and social short temper and be arrogance. Well, do you have a better question over here? Yeah, I'm taking. I'm trying to read this as they go.

Old nations. Hey, I'm living in a foreign country and learning the language. What's the best way to deal with the language barrier when trying to get to know people?

Sure. Language barrier when trying to get to know people. So old nations. Old nations, language barrier real quick. I've done this many times. I've lived in Spanish speaking countries, Portuguese speaking countries, and then I've traveled a little bit to Asia. I find that the best way to deal with the language barrier is to depending on your level one, if you speak none, start in English because the people who want to learn English will. Will be the ones that are most forgiving of your inability to speak. I tend to find that if I start in English and switch to that second language, it actually finds more of the people that are willing to work with me after that. I think the big thing is not to hold yourself to a high standard of getting everything right and try to expand your vocabulary. Try to say things that you don't know how to say and fail. If you stay inside the box of the vocabulary that you learned in the book, your conversations will be boring because you can only ask where the bathroom is and where the library is. But if you push yourself to share more complex things that you would like to say, right, that's going to give you a chance to actually one, expand your vocabulary and your language skills as well as connect with them on a deeper level.

Coffeegirl4258 what are some ways you can make yourself more interesting to others?

Ways you can make yourself more interesting to others? Great question. These are broad questions. So what is a way that you can make yourself more interesting to other people? I think it's really by focusing first on yourself and what is most interesting to you. If I were to tell you one way to be more interesting to others is to play a musical instrument and you don't care about that. Sure, you might go out and learn the piano and be really good and people might be interested, but that's not going to connect you with the type of people that you want, I would really come back to what are the things that you are interested in. We live in a big enough, connected enough world now that there is a community for every single interest. So come back to what is it that you like and I will tell you all of my friends that I've met in the last several years. Most of them have come through this business Charisma on command. And it's because I put it out there first on my blog and then on the YouTube channel that I'm interested in social interactions. What is it that makes one person likable and another person not as likable? So start with what you find interesting, double down on that and start a club, start a blog, a YouTube channel around it. You want to be the hub of a social circle rather than a spoke. And if you can do that, you're going to find that people that are interested in what you're interested in will gravitate towards you. And you might wind up with 1300 people asking questions, which is incredible. I'm blown away that this is happening right now.

Good question. Active predator.

Active predator.

What to do do when a bunch of people don't agree with you or your idea or what would you do?

What would I do when a bunch of people don't agree with me or my idea? I guess it would depend. I'd have to ask you a follow up to that question. In what sort of context are you in a group? Certainly a lot of people did not agree with me when I started Charisma on command. And I think I made a video, how to Deal with Negativity that talks about that at length. But the real thing is I didn't try to convince them. I think generally speaking your convictions should be internal. You don't need to convince the entire world that your business plan is going to work. You need to convince a handful of customers. And if you try to become a evangelist for a cause and you need to convince everybody that disagrees with you, you actually it shows in a lack of belief because you need other people to agree with you. But if you really have strong conviction in whatever it is that you're saying, you'll just let other people feel differently. And that's totally fine because you know that you're going to find a tribe that is into what you're into.

Yusuf Hussain how to deal with people who are verbally or sarcastically attacking you.

Attacking you. So I've talked about this in videos, but quickly Yousef how to deal with people who are attacking you. The thing that I would recommend doing first off is the most power. We're looking at kind of training people. And I know that it sounds crazy, but the way that people work with animals, for instance a dog, is they give positive reinforcement and they give negative reinforcements. Positive reinforcement being a treat. Negative reinforcement Typically can just be ignoring them. So in the case of a human who is doing something that you don't like, one of the most powerful things you can do is ignore them. So if you're in a group conversation and somebody starts sarcastically attacking you, if you just focus your attention on someone else and continue conversation and let them become the outsider, that is a very. It's a non aggressive, negative feeling that you're creating in them. And they will quickly learn not to do that. If they do continue. If for whatever reason they take control of that group and it becomes them just making fun of you. One of the things that you can do that's going to make it better is to separately, I recommend not doing this in a group because that'll make them tend to dig in their heels, take them aside and say, hey, man, just wanted to let you know, when you said this, it made me feel this. If you put it in that when you said this, they can't deny it. They said that it made me feel. As opposed to you were being a jerk. It made me feel. Puts it on you, makes it so that it's not something they can deny. Because if you say you were being a jerk, then they might go, no, I wasn't. But it made me feel like you were attacking me. Most people at that point will stop. So that's what I'd recommend to do in that sort of situation. Situation.

Kuwo Tuff.

Hold on, let me see. I just. I think I might have seen one. Oh yeah.

This one's actually pretty awesome.

Oh, you got a good one. Okay. Yeah.

Help. I'm playing the violin in front of a huge audience tomorrow for the first time and I'm insanely stressed out. Advice.

Okay, so you're insanely stressed out. You're playing the violin in front of a lot of people.

Amazing.

Cool. So what I would recommend again, I find myself coming back to the same thing is you are stressed out because you are thinking about it in a particular way. You're probably thinking about, what if I mess up? What if it goes terribly? I would encourage you one to go through and actually get your practice done, which I'm sure you have at this point. You need to have a core level of competency before the confidence. Second is to go through and visualize it going well for you. Right? You hitting the right notes, playing it right and then getting the applause and the cheering of all your friends and family. Family who are proud of you. The last thing that I would do is when you get there, you're going to want to control your breathing and your nervous system because the way that you hold your body is going to send signals to your brain that says freak out or not. So before you go, force yourself to take slow, deep breaths. Your heart is probably going to start racing and it's going to fight you on this. And if you let it run away from you, you will get that adrenaline spike and it will make you feel play worse. But if you breathe deep and low into your belly and make yourself do that for five to 10 breaths, that's going to be hugely helpful to you right before you go. And you'll find that it actually steadies your hands as well. So that's what I recommend.

Someone actually earlier asked about any breathing techniques that you do.

I have. So I have a couple breathing techniques that I've been playing with. Some are for singing. I've recently started doing the Wim Hof and I can't comment enough on it to tell you, you if it's good or bad. But it's. If you haven't seen it, he goes. What does he go through the mouth? He goes. He goes bigger in, then he goes out. So he charges himself up with oxygen and lets out the CO2 and then is able to hold his breath for a really long time. That's awesome. But that's what I've been doing. How to focus. So let me see this one. How to really focus on the things that matter and are important to you instead of worrying about every little thing that may happen but most likely won't. So Splat. Splat Blaster. How to not focus on the little things.

Great name.

I think what I'd recommend here is actually taking a step back and going to your mindset. It sounds like you think that these little things might come in and knock you off your game. And the most important charismatic mindset that I've ever come across in my life, I think, is that no matter what happens, I will be okay. And what I would say is it's not so much that the people who don't sweat the small stuff don't. It doesn't occur to them. It's that it occurs to them and it so quickly is dismissed as if that happens. Whatever, it's going to be fine. It's not going to kill me that it doesn't bother them. So how do you focus on the big things? It's really by making. By training yourself that everything will be okay no matter what happens. Right. If the situation goes wrong and you walk into a room and people laugh at you, or you speak to a girl and she doesn't like you, or you give a presentation and it doesn't go over well, you're gonna get another chance. You're not gonna be. You're not gonna be executed for it. And if you can come back to the sense that every single time you extend yourself and you don't get what you want, that's just one more notch in your belt, that's one more failure that takes you closer to where you want to be. That is gonna help you to not sweat the small stuff. And naturally those bigger things will come come into focus.

Dragon176 how do you socialize in places that are really loud, like clubs or concerts?

Cool. So I see. Let me come back to that one. I see one that I've seen a couple times now. My question. How do you make negative people positive? This is from D. Manek. Because I am a musician who is surrounded by negative people making it difficult to collaborate. Great question. There's a couple of ways. So first off, what you want to do is not feed it. And again, I mentioned this before, people are. We are animals and we respond to positive and negative reinforcement. So if somebody gets attention when they complain, which is what happens in most groups of people, that's going to train them that when I want commiseration or I want to feel good, what I need to do is complain. So don't feed it by not giving it attention. When somebody complains, you don't need to necessarily tell them to stop or shut up or that they shouldn't do that, but just refocus on somebody else in that group or a different topic. If you're with one person, that is going to move the conversation in a different direction. If they come back to complaining again, just again, gently move it to something else. And that will teach them that they do not get connection when they complain to you. The second thing is be a positive force yourself, right? Oftentimes in very negative groups, what they lack is one person who will stand up and just see the bright side of things. And even in the most negative, cynical of groups, there are people who, when they find that one person who is looking on the bright side, who is excited about things, who can reframe a situation, and they're saying, man, that guy's music sucks, or that isn't good enough, and you're like, you know what? I really liked the chorus of his song. I thought it sounded amazing. And I just want. And you see the guy and you give him a high five. That is going to inspire at least 50% of the complainers to. To shift immediately. And the last thing that you're going to have to do, and this is hard, is that the people that don't change, you're going to have to start to move away from. Not every single musician is a complainer. I can promise you that the ones that are are not going to be good for your life or probably your career, even if they're very talented people. So when someone is complaining all the time, you can give them, hey, just a heads up. You don't even have to do. What I tend to do is just move away from them if they're not close to me. But if they are close to you, say, hey, I wanted to talk to you because I think that I've noticed that you tend to see the negative side of most things in life. And I totally get it. I get that there's songs that stink. I get that there's classes that aren't that good. But for me, I want to focus on the positive. So if we can do that when we're talking, awesome, I would just appreciate that. And if they don't shift, you might have to move away from them.

This is a great one, Marissa. Deal. Thank you for the video about your dad. I really relate and it helped me improve myself dramatically. How can I help my mom, whom I have trouble with, improve as well?

Okay, so made a video about my dad and how we have fought in the past. How can you help your mom? I wish I knew more about what you're dealing with with your mother. Yes. So, Marissa, if you can write more about that, that would be helpful. And I can come back to your question. How to accept things that are frustrating without becoming angry. Let me see if this. Okay. How do I never run out of things to say? Cool. So how to never run out of things to say again? I came back to this at the beginning. It's not so much about having a stockpile of things in your head. There's a couple of things that you can do very quickly that, that I'll go over. First off, improv comedy classes are great to go to because they force you to think spontaneously on your feet. So one thing that you're going to learn to do in improv comedy is how to free associate. So somebody says Philadelphia, that they're from Philadelphia. Right. And you don't know what to say. You've never been to Philadelphia. Someone who has experience in improv or has practiced. We cover this in the course Charisma University Shameless plug is we're going to talk about how to free associate. So you think about Philadelphia, you think about immediately I go to Will Smith, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, and so they say, I grew up in Philadelphia, say, oh my God, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, I love that. Is there any 90s TV shows that you were crazy about like that, and all of a sudden you're able to take one topic that looks like it's a dead end and transform it into an interesting piece of conversation. So that's one is learning how to free associate and make these diagonal leaps to different topics. Another is by really going through and just kind of split testing the things about you that are interesting to other people. For instance, depending on what I say, I do, and I've said in the past that I'm an entrepreneur, I run an Internet business, I'm a writer, I'm a YouTuber. People ask different kinds of follow up questions and the one that tends to get people Most interested is YouTube. Can you make a living on that? What is your channel about? What do you do? When I say I'm a writer, people go, oh. So split test different ways of answering those most common questions for you. Right. This is going to help you get onto conversational threads that are stronger. Because the truth is, when you run out of things to say with a girl, it's typically because you've asked those most basic questions. Where are you from? What do you do? What classes do you take? And you've all answered them really briefly. If you take a little bit more time to elaborate on them, and again, split test the interesting things that you have to say, you're likely going to escape the small talk portion of conversation into something more interesting. So I hope that helps.

We've had a lot of questions on like, what books are you currently reading right now? And then what are your top three books that you've recommended?

Okay, sure. So I love this question. Top three books, I would have to say the Four Hour Work Week I think gets number one. That's the reason that I'm here in front of you guys right now. So four Hour Work Week. For anyone who is interested in not working at the job that they're working at right now, I'd really highly recommend the second top book. I'm a big Tony Robbins fan. I actually like his video programs better than his books. But if you want to read Awaken the Giant within, go ahead and do that. And third, I'm gonna shift this a little bit. I know that this hasn't been a historical top book for me, but it's the one that I'm thinking of right now is essentialism. And essentialism basically talks about the little things in your life that make the biggest difference. Oh, my gosh. Do you have that piece of paper?

Yeah, I do.

I have to show you guys this. This is incredible. So people always ask about business. What is it that made you guys break through? How come? Oh, you just were successful overnight. I want to show you this piece of paper. That is my game plan for how I was going to grow the business. Ready? I'll show you this real quick. This was back at the beginning of 2015. So I don't know if you can see it. Number one thing that I'm going to do is LinkedIn and Facebook ads. Right. The second thing that I'm going to do is Twitter and Periscope. And the third thing that I'm going to do is YouTube, which is. And I'm going to pick zero competition keywords. And my point here with regards to essentialism is that you don't always know what things in your life are going to lead to the biggest breakthroughs. So, one, keep an open mind, Dabble in different things. I thought this YouTube thing was the third most important thing I could do. And then once you do find that thing, when YouTube starts going well for you, when you find a group of friends that you really connect with, when you're in an industry that you find awesome, double down on that and do it over and over and over again. That's really the core message, I think, of essentialism. And it made the business go crazy. So how did I find the motivation to start Charisma on command? Sure. So one thing I didn't mention when I was telling my I'm doing a draw my life later, the first business that I ever did, I read the four Hour Work Week and I started a parkour business with my friend Ben. And we knew that we were interested in learning parkour and we wanted to make a DVD to teach other people how to do it. So we got a guy in New York, we filmed this thing, we started selling it, and what we learned very quickly is that while there was interest in this park dvd, we actually weren't that interested. It hurts your fingers. It's really cool to look at, but it actually takes a lot of slog in terms of work and it's great. I recommend it if you're interested, but it wasn't for us. And what that meant is that we were unwilling and unmotivated when it came to putting in the time to making that business grow, unfortunately. So we probably put six, eight months in that had this product. It was selling well, and then just the gas ran out. So the way that I found the motivation to come back to your question for charisma on command is that I sat down, I was in Brazil, and my buddy came up to me, and I didn't know what I was gonna do. I've been. I'd left my job at this point. I'm hanging out in Brazil for a couple weeks with my friend after getting let go of my consulting job. And my friend says, man, why don't you just go talk about relationships, social skills? Because you have. By the way, you can moderate comments. If you see any mean ones, you get in there. Okay. Yeah, Actually, no, you can't. You're not on my computer. I'll let you do it. No, you can leave it. It's fine. So. So anyway, I'm in Brazil. My friend says, why don't. Why don't you talk about relationships? Just. Just let. Yeah, here. I'm gonna. I'm. I'm gonna let you take care of this. You can do it on my computer. Okay, we're getting in the comments. Sorry, guys, we're coming after you. Here you go. Just don't yank this out.

Okay, perfect.

You can get on my video and take care of that. So my friend said, why don't you talk about relationships and social skills? And that was the click breakthrough for me because, one, it was something that I was really passionate about. I spent a lot of time in Brazil trying to make new friends. I was constantly curious about what made it one person. Go see if you can go in and find the person who's just leaving huge, big comments. Spamming. Can you get rid of them? Thanks for the heads up, guys. I'm on it. I'm gonna wrap this up because now I've been so frazzled with this spamming stuff. I know. So the important thing that this story is meant to tell is that I found the motivation to do it, because I started with something that I already cared about tremendously. And in doing that. Hold on. I'm gonna get this guy right here. Here we go. How do I block you? I don't know what this weird thing is. Here we go. Block. I got it. He's good. We're taken care of. I think I got him. Sorry, guys. I'm learning this tech stuff. Anyway, we got him. The point is, you stay motivated. I think by starting with something that you actually care about. And that was charisma on command for me. It was not parkour for me, even though that had a great market niche. So I'm gonna take a quick break because I. Not a break. I'm gonna go to the super chats because I appreciate that you guys don't have to do this, by the way, but I do want to give some shout outs to the people who have super chatted. So Ethan, Yeah, I saw your message. Ethan, I will respond to you via email. Simon Sinek. Start with why. What do I think? Fantastic. Love that talk one. It's extremely well executed if you want a blueprint for how to do a presentation and I actually might do a breakdown of this. His start with why talk is awesome. Second, from a business perspective, I think it's great. I started this business from a certain, certainly an interest perspective, but it was selfish. It was something that I was interested in. But I am lucky in that by focusing on what I found important in the world because I think that relationships are the most important thing. Your friends, your co workers, whoever you marry or date, that determines the quality of your life. I think without necessarily watching, starting with why or codifying it, that has come through in what we have done with charisma on command. So I love that stuff. I think that start with why is a fantastic talk. I've heard it's better even than the book, though I've not read it. Oobza1234 find your video super ultra useful to me and to help my friend. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Of course I'm happy. This is blowing me away. We'll have to do these more often. Odd Reality is not banned. Is there someone else that I need to ban in here? Is he back? I'll pay attention. I'm going down to the bottom. If I see people spam and I'll try to get them, give signs we know this isn't a vod. What do I think of Mark Manson? I spoke to Mark years ago. Mark is a cool guy. The first time that I read his book I thought that it had. I read Models and I thought that it had a bit too much focus on immediately excluding women who you did not connect with quickly. And I thought that that one piece was something we disagreed on because I feel that we. When you go out to a bar or club, you can expect women to kind of have a shield up to be aware that they're going to get hit on a lot of times and they're not always as Friendly as they might be, but with the exception of that one point, I think Models is great and Mark is a fantastic writer. I'm 29 years old. Any tips on starting online conversations? I don't really know. Have I seen any Jordan Peterson? Yes, I have. You know what, I'm going to go off topic here. I was watching Jordan Peterson the other day. Really interesting stuff. I think that he. It's so fascinating to me to see how popular he's gotten so quickly. I will say the one piece that I have disagreed with that I saw is his. His sense that the mythological readings. And I think I listened to him talk to Sam Harris, but briefly. I think that when I hear people talk about the hero's journey and how all these stories tend to have the same sort of elements in them that highlights the hero's journey, that it's confirmation bias. We're starting to look for these types of elements and we make the story fit the arc that we'd like to see it. And Sam Harris kind of illustrates this point in going through. He opens up a cookbook and he reads a cookbook and he applies a hero's journey to making the eggs and all this kind of stuff. So if you don't know that, I'm gonna get back to charisma right now. But I do like Jordan Harris. He's a really great speaker and I agree with much of what he says. But I tend to focus on the things sometimes where I disagree with someone because that's how my mind works. I look for flaws in what they say. Mike Tyson. Someone will be rejected. Recommend starting. Okay. Brother in law crossed my life. I can't seem to get over it. Ah, so Dr. Kendo commentaries. This is really interesting. My brother in law crossed the line by verbally lambasting my wife two years ago. And I just can't seem to get over it. I don't feel I adequately stood up for myself during the conflict. This is good. So I think what you've. Whoops, I hope I didn't block anyone there. I think what you're highlighting in yourself is that yes, this is probably not about your brother in law, but about your feeling to yourself. You don't feel that you handled it well. So what I would recommend are two steps. First off, go in, write a letter to your brother in law. You don't have to give it to him. So be completely honest. Everything that you wish you'd said, I think that this was inappropriate. This was this second. And this is by the way, they've done I don't know who it was. I hate randomly quoting studies, but I did read that there was a study that this helped people get over feelings that they couldn't get past. Second, write your response from him, trying to step into his shoes, seeing what he felt, and probably feeling apologetic about it. When you're done with that, get rid of it. See if that has been cathartic to you if you're done with it. If you're not, what I recommend then is going and writing a letter to yourself because it sounds like you're more angry at yourself than you are at him. Write through why you forgive or are angry at yourself for not standing up, and then write why you forgive yourself for it. If that doesn't work, sit down with him and talk to him. And you might want to say, hey, this is completely random. But. But I realize it's been something I've been hanging onto and I know I probably shouldn't, but I wanted to say two years ago you had a conversation with my wife and it made me feel one, like you were attacking her. But two, I was upset that I didn't stand up for her more. And just so we can clear the air and have a better relationship than I think we do right now, I just wanted to bring it up and clear the air and say I didn't like that, I didn't like how I handled it. I'm glad it hasn't happened since and I'd like to have a better relationship with you and I think that will go far. How to Deal with Fear do you have a good one? Yeah.

Sam Dell what is the best postures and body language tips for short people, especially in presentations? I have that tomorrow in my community would appreciate your tips, bro.

Sure. I don't think that I can't think of a specific one for a shirt person. The only thing, if you wanted to come across as taller, is to wear shoes with a heel or a platform, but Body Language Tips for presentation 1. Concentrate on open body language. When you are nervous, it is natural to shut down for most people. You can close your arms, you keep your chin down, you might even put your hands over your groin kind of like that. What I'd like you to do is when you step into this, turn your palms out, face the audience like this and when you're standing, if you notice. What I do is I try to make sure that I'm showing my palms at the beginning of the video because that puts me into a specific mindset where I'm going to be more Expressive, that's the most important thing. If you keep your chin up, you show your throat, inner elbows, wrists, palms. That tends to open up your body language and make you feel much more comfortable. So that's the biggest thing that I would do in terms of being short. I don't think that it's any different. Also, you can talk with your hands. That's something that I do quite often. How do I handle? So I'm going to go for a little bit longer here. We'll try to within an hour talk about oxytocin drug in your head. I'm not a neuroscientist. I know that it makes people bond. That's really it though, that I am familiar. And hugging makes it come through. That's an interesting thing. If you want to feel love, feelings, hug a bunch of people, go out, do that stranger hug thing. It's incredible. Can you teach me to be arrogant? Charisma on command. Sure. Highly effective. People, same mood. How do you speak through a smile without looking creepy? I've never thought about the looking creepy. So one of the things that I encourage people to do is to speak through a smile. It's the difference between me talking like this as I go and I'm sharing with you and it's. And it's the difference between me talking like this and you can watch two things happen. One, I smile, but my eyes shift as well. It's not if you think about the body language stuff too much. Right. Like I said, good. Think open body language for the beginning of a presentation. But if you start to try to squint you over, squint your eyes like I did when I was learning this stuff, or smile a certain amount, you're going to come across as creepy. So what I recommend is just holding in your head the single thought of. I want to be more positive and smiley when I speak. Don't worry about what happens with your eyes or your smile. But if you start a conversation I'm just thinking that it tends to come through a little bit better. And again, you get out of your head so much what's going on in my eyes? What is going on with my lips? And the creepiness goes away. It is when you talk like this and you're thinking, what are my eyes doing? That it becomes creepy.

I love the open eye one.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

I have a problem with being totally drained after a night out. I want to see if I left any of these.

I was looking at that one too.

Okay. So I see a. I'm Going to hop in. I saw a super chat from Sarah. How do I stop rambling when I'm nervous? Good question. I mean, the simple answer is to stop, but I think we should probably go deeper than that. It sounds like what I'd have to think of the rambling. Because quite frankly, this isn't a topic that I've thought about before. But I'm thinking to the people I know who sometimes ramble, and it seems like what they're doing is they're going until they get the response that they're hoping to see see from the other person. Because they're afraid that if they just let the silence sit that something not good would happen. So they go and they go and they go and they go and they go and they hope that the other person will say yes. I love what you said. So what I'd recommend in terms of dealing with that is just set. This is basic, but set yourself a small challenge, and when you feel yourself start to ramble, stop, take a deep breath, count to three, and see if the other person jumps in. Because my guess is that there's a subconscious fear that if you were to stop, that the other person would run away or not understand what you're saying or not ask you to clarify. And I think that what you're going to find is people will appreciate it if you know that you're rambling. They will appreciate it when you stop and just allow that silence to sit to give them a chance to jump in somehow.

First year of high school, do this again.

Oh. So I'm thinking, yeah, I'm thinking every Thursday, if this works for you guys, I might just hop on randomly. There's between a thousand people here. This is. This is fun for me. I'm enjoying this. But I don't want to necessarily overdo it or create a type of video that nobody's interested in watching on the channel. So mostly I'm gonna see how you guys respond. I'm also trying to. I realize I've been very frazzled by these comments coming in because they're right next to the camera that I'm looking at and I've been distracted. So I need to practice focus. This is really good for me. This is going to teach me to deal with distraction while I'm answering questions. So I would like to do this again for sure. And I'm thinking at the latest next Thursday, maybe I'll hop on. Before first year of high school started my life as a pretty much only school. My life feels meaningless. And now I feel Lonely. Can I give you some advice? Yeah. So I know this is again when I get these general questions. I'm sorry that I don't have a more specific answer. But if you feel like your life is meaningless because you're only doing school, simple thing to say would be to find a way to incorporate one either people into your schooling if you can hang out for study sessions after school or to pull back the amount of time that you're putting into school and find create space to connect with friends, join a sports team with your school. There's tons of after school clubs that you have the easiest way and I know high school can be weird in terms of socializing if you're struggling is to find a common interest. And that's why I recommend meetup.com but schools clubs at the end of school are a great way to start song on a guitar. Maybe another day. Yeah.

How to Deal with Fear of Success Specifically with relationships. I only have the problem when flirting with girls I'm attracted to. I keep reaching a point in which I choke or I freeze.

So you're fearing success in a relationship? Sure. It sounds. And again, so those are two questions that I think are different. I'm not sure that what you're describing is the fear of success. Hitting a point where you choke your freeze is maybe it could be for a ton of reasons. But in terms of fear of success in relationships, again, the fear that is there is that the unknown getting to an area. It's typically that you're going to get to an area in a relationship where you don't know and something horrible could happen or that you're going to get so close to someone you're going to get everything that you want and it's going to somehow disappoint you or that you're going to lose it. And then once it's gone, it's gone and that's going to hurt even worse. So the technique that I've described technically Tony Robbins thing I found really good for shifting feelings. Write down the benefit you get from fearing success, the cost that it's creating. Make it hurt. And then the benefit of shifting your mindset to going for success. That's the number one thing I can recommend.

Evan Jacobson Ex girlfriend Ex girlfriend wants to talk again. But I don't know if she's trying to use me or get to another guy.

Me neither. I mean she wants to. I don't know. So what I would say is if you want to talk to her, go ahead and do it. But it Sounds like you're aware that she might have a different motive, so keep your eyes for that.

Are you interested in taking questions on how to grow other people's channels?

I love Elliot Hulse. Sure. I'll do a YouTube question before we go. What's the question?

So Eddie Live is asking how can I expand my cover YouTube channel? How do I expand it in general? I want to get an audience at the moment of right now, and then when I get bigger, I want to release my own music for people.

Got it. So it sounds like there's a good person who's got a cover channel on YouTube and they want to grow it bigger. Correct? Yeah. Okay. So number one thing, I'll tell you how we got big, and I'll tell you how this can translate to you finally super happy. One of the things that we did was we rode popular things. Now, that might seem obvious, but one of the biggest videos we had at the beginning were Conor McGregor, Donald Trump, game of Thrones, and that exploded our channel. So for you, you need to hop on those big songs as soon as they come out. So, for instance, what I'd recommend you do is you know that another Ed Sheeran song is going to be a number one hit, something off of that new album of Divide. You need to know how to play. I think the next big one is probably going to be perfect. You need to know how to play that and sing that. Excellent. So that as soon as that single goes live, you are the COVID on YouTube. And again, you wanted to say perfect by Ed Sheeran. Cover by you title is going to be hugely important. Second thumbnail, if you can get Ed Sheeran's. You don't necessarily want Ed Sheeran's photo in a thumbnail. But we did that obviously, when we were doing some of the breakdowns, and that immediately got recognition. But that's the biggest thing I can recommend. And then secondly, ed with YouTube, covers are crowded, man. YouTube is crowded. So you're gonna need to bring people in from off platform. So I don't know where, but you're gonna have to go to the Internet, find a soundcloud, find a forum, find something else where people are interested in cover specifically, and you want to link them to your video when it comes up. So be active on a music forum. We did this in some subreddits right when we were starting our videos, and then we'd share ours. And that was where our first effect thousand to ten thousand people came from, was really these subreddits. And then the YouTube algorithm takes over and helps. Plus, you gotta be good. I haven't seen your stuff, obviously, but that's important. And I'm sure that you're practicing your craft as well.

Oh, this is a good one from high school. Got a good one, channel number one. Dad dad Rap 27.

Dad dad Rap 27. Love it.

I'm in high school and I want to ask this girl out, but I only see her in the hall for a short time.

Oh, man, this was me. So I never figured it out in high school. I'm going to be honest with you. So you're in high school, you'd like to ask this girl out, but you only ever see her in the hall for a short time. So this might not be. Because it's been a long time since I've been in high school. This might not be the highest percentage. She says yes. But what it is going to be is the highest chance that you don't do what I did, which is go through high school without asking her out. So what I'm gonna recommend is first off, if you can get her at the end of the day or if you know that you're gonna see her somewhere, take that time. Because going through the hall where she's walking, I agree, is tough. But if you know she's stopped, she's at her locker, you walk up there and say, hey, I know this is random, but I think that you're really cute or that I like you or that you seem like you're really smart. Whatever it is that you like about it, right? Pay her a compliment. And then say, and I was wondering if you wanted to do specific thing with me. Don't say, be my girlfriend, but say, I was wondering if you wanted to go see a movie this weekend. Or I was wondering if you wanted to come to such and such event. So find her a time where she's still say, hey, I know this is random. Pay her a compliment, but would you like to do a specific thing with me and see how it goes from there? She'll say yes, she'll say no, we don't know. But if. If you can get some time with her out of there, that's where you can start to go out. But if you jump right into, will you be my girlfriend? It's probably not going to happen.

We've gotten this question a few times from Momchill.

Momchill, Momchil.

How do I find mentors and people to look up to or involve yourself with people who you can.

What is it? Mentors? Yeah.

Mentors.

So I'll be honest, I've not been a big mentor guy. I haven't jumped on. I wish I had. I think it's something that would have helped us a lot. I have read books quite frankly, and that's been my path. I wish I could tell you more because I know people who have gotten in with somebody who was, who was blowing up. But that's not, that's never been what I did. So I don't want to speak where I don't have experience. So I'm not exactly. Yeah, Tai Lopez talks a lot about mentors so you can, you can watch his stuff. Books are my books are my mentor for voice wise. Sorry guys. Oh, I like this question. I'm going to do this light informs Comparing myself to others is destroying me and has completely crippled me. I feel useless, empty, lonely and completely hold on. Oh, and then a cut. But anyway, I feel it's comparing yourself is not helpful here and completely lost. How do you reverse comparing yourself to others? Great question. So I'm going to give you more than this but I am going to come back to what I've said now several times, which is there is something that your brain likes about this belief and if you can go through recognize the benefit. And I will tell you as someone who has done this in the past, comparing yourself to others, probably you feel like you need to do that and be able to stay on top. So you compare yourself and sometimes you find that you're superior and that feels good and sometimes you feel that you're inferior and that feels bad and it motivates you. So at one level, this comparing yourself is creating a positive thing in your life but clearly it's not overall good for you. So recognize the benefit, the pain it sounds like you've got, but you need to make it sting. I've said this three times now. I don't want to belabor this point but think about how inferior, pathetic, how it's ruining your friendships. Whatever it is that's going to get you, write that down and make them big and then bold the one that is most painful. And then the benefit that you get from completely reversing that mindset, which I recommend, which is going to be to being proud of the ways in which other people excel in life. Not comparing themselves to you, comparing yourself only to as to your best effort, for instance, that's a much more powerful mindset. And so when you see someone that is better than you, worse than you, whatever, and you get that feeling of where do we Rank on this social hierarchy. Step one is chastise yourself, which it sounds like you're already doing. Go. This is a destructive mindset. I refuse to do this. And second is find something in them if they're beneath you, that you can be proud of them for that you can elevate them. Right? You can go, wow, that guy is not really strong, but he seems like a friendly dude. Or that dude's really. He's completely huge at the gym. And you know what? He must have put in a lot of work to get that way. And who knows if he's smart or dumb, but he clearly has worked hard. If you can find, find a way to feel happy for them that they have achieved some kind of success in your life. That is where you begin to free yourself right where you can. I talked about this in a video. Why you don't feel good enough if you want more on this. So that's 20 minutes. That really does go into this at a deeper level. Public speaking individuals. So sorry. Who are the people that have touched my life in terms of public speaking? George Carlin? Alan Watts? Anyone? Yes. So Tony Robbins, which I've mentioned before. Who are the other people that have really watched on stage and thought they've been amazing? It's not so much public speaking. Chris Pratt, when I did that video on him, I love doing these charisma breakdowns because I get so deep into these videos of these people that it starts to become the way that I behave. And I, for a week or two after, was so much funnier just from doing the Chris Pratt thing. So I love watching Chris Pratt. Russell Brand, so sharp. When I do videos on him, I find that I am much more eloquent. Who are other people? Those guys are top. Will Smith in terms of just infectious positivity. God, I love his stuff. So those are the main guys. I'm gonna do one or two more, and then we'll stop. I'm loving this, by the way, guys. I just. I realized we're hitting an hour now, so we'll wind it down after this.

So we've got a few different ones. I've got one about a leader, one about confidence, and I have another one about anxiety.

Which one do you want to do? Whatever.

Okay. Natik Kumar Baru. So, New York City. What's up? Love your work. Whenever I try to be confident and funny, I end up being unmanly and cocky. Is the way of Super Superior man still the best book on being a man? Question mark, or does your book work on that?

So way of a superior man. I like parts of. I don't like all of. I recommend people read it. I'm not totally enamored with every point he makes, but it's a good start. So books for confidence. What I would actually check out is our Conor McGregor video that talks about confidence. It's got a lot on visualizing. It's got a lot on that confidence piece. There's another one that I did called the Core of Self Confidence, which is only four minutes long. And I think that really gets to it. So that's what I'd recommend there. How to stay positive. Again, I'm going to start recommending videos just to get through these faster. We did one on Chris Pratt that covers that. Check that out. Conor McGarr is cocky at times. I agree.

There was a guy earlier who asked about, he's going to a festival.

Yeah.

And he's staying sober. How does he have fun. Have fun.

Oh, man. So if you're going to a festival or anywhere and you stay sober, your drug is your body.

You did a video on that, too.

So what you're going to want to do is everyone else is going to be getting that state kick from whatever they're taking. Right. You're going to want to get it. You've got the music, you've got stuff going on. You can start to feel positive by the way that you move and dance. So when you're talking to people and get those hands moving, maybe not as rapidly as I just did, but more speak in a louder voice and dance like crazy, the more that you can rev yourself up with your body speaking, all that kind of stuff, that. That will be like a drug. And if you do it right, I get this all the time. People are going to ask you if they can have what you're on and they will be shocked that it is literally just dancing. So check that out. So I see one. I want to get the super chat in before we. We got the rambling. How to be charismatic when managing people at work. This is a big question for sure. This is a big question. Yeah. I might have to do a video on this. I'm gonna try to answer you as quickly as am I. Connor Murphy from H3H3. So how to be charismatic when dealing with people at work. I'm gonna give you a couple tips. This is a great question that deserves its own video. One, when you're in charge of people, I find, and I'm guilty of this, when you write an email, don't tell people what to do ask them. And this seems small because they're going to say yes every time. But it feels very differently if you say, hey, would you be able to take care of this? Versus do get these sheets back to me. That has a huge impact on morale. And thanks. Smiley face. In your workplace, you can determine how many emojis are appropriate. I try to keep them high on mine because again, the people beneath you are going to say yes. So you want to be. You want to be. You want to ask them permission. Other things that you can do. You want to tend to try to find what it is that motivates the people that are beneath you. There's such a wide range of motivations. Some people want to move ahead in this industry. Other people are just trying to make more money. Other people are in it. They don't care how much money they make, but they live for proof. And so if you can sit down and talk to them and just have in your head one word that you associate with all of these people, that is okay. He's in it. He loves praise. He's in it for a chance to rise in the company. This person's in it for X, Y and Z reasons. That is going to help you to motivate them and to speak to them in a way that communicates the benefit of what they're going to get if they do the things that you ask them to do. And that's going to make them feel much more intrinsically motivated and not like they're doing things just. Just because you say so. So I'll have to do another video on this. Great question, and I think we'll do it a different time. But, guys, this is awesome. I've had a blast. We've gone an hour here. Still got nearly a thousand people. I'm gonna do more of these for sure next week. Like I said, I'm thinking more blogs. I'm learning how to deal with all these chats coming in and how to ban spammers. So I hope that you guys have liked this video. I'm gonna see you in the next one, and there will be more soon. Take care, guys.