Christine WongFounder, Zenshin Collective Pte Ltd · Trauma Informed Coach for Couple relationships, Careers and Business

Hey Christine! Series Ep 1: What is responsibility in a couple's relationship?

10 Oct 2022 · 2 min

Watch on YouTube

2:15

In this introductory episode of the "Hey Christine!" series, relationship coach Christine Wong discusses the concept of personal responsibility within romantic partnerships. Drawing on two decades of experience helping couples, she observes that many clients initially blame their partners for relationship problems, which places them in a victim mindset and relinquishes personal power. Christine explains that taking personal responsibility—rather than blaming—allows individuals to regain agency, recognize their own blind spots (including unconscious and intergenerational patterns), and influence the relationship positively. She invites viewers to conduct a self‑check: assess whether their thoughts, words, and actions serve or harm the partnership, and consider how family‑of‑origin dynamics may be playing out. The video concludes with a call‑to‑action, offering email contact and coaching sessions for those who want deeper guidance in uncovering blind spots and cultivating responsibility.

Chapters

Hello everyone, this is Christine. Today I would like to talk about responsibility in the couple relationship. You see, in the last 20 years I've supported many couples and I realized when they first come and see me, most of the time they will complain about their partner. You see, my partner is this and that and that's why the relationship is going nowhere. Or Christine, can you help me change my partner? My partner is this and that and this and that. And It sounds like you are blaming, yeah, blaming each other. You see, if you take responsibility, you won't be blaming. If you take personal responsibility, you will gain back the power to change. You cannot change the other person, you can only change yourself. And the problem with blaming is you give your power away. You enter into a victim state and you start to feel helpless, and you cannot see your own blind spots. And the distance between you and your partner will widen. It won't go anywhere. It will just spiral down. So today, maybe you'd like to take some time, do a self-check. Is what you are doing, saying, feeling serving the relationship, or is it hurting your partner? Is your relationship patterns maybe even similar with your parents' relationship patterns? And how is it really affecting you right now? I have many couples whom I've supported I help them to discover their blind spots so that they know exactly how they are affecting their relationship. Today, do you want to start taking responsibility for your life? Do you want to find out about your blind spots? Do you know what are the blind spots that you have? How about those that you are totally not aware about, like your unconscious blind spots? And if you really want to know, I can help you. So what you can do is to email to this email and book a session with me, and I'll support you to find some answers if you are curious. Thank you.