How To Get Your Shit Together and Take Back Control

All right guys, welcome back to the mantalk show. Today we're going to be talking about how to get your shit together and regain some sense of control in your life. I'm going to tell you a little bit about my past because I was a man for a long time who didn't have any sense of control, who didn't have any sense of hope or a vision or direction or clarity, who kind of felt like, you know, I kind of felt like my, my shit was a mess, like everything was a mess. My relationship, my finances. I didn't have direction in terms of what I wanted to do with my life. And so I want to start off by telling you a little bit about where I was and some of the pieces that I have leveraged and executed on to get to where I am today. Because what I can tell you is that when I think about my 20 year old self, you know, my, you know, 25 year old self, if he could see what I have done and what I've built today, he'd be shocked. Right? And sometimes I feel that way where I look at my life, I look at what I've built, I look at the success that I've had in my business, I've built incredibly successful companies, I've had an incredibly successful career when I worked in the tech space, when I worked with Apple, I've traveled the world, I've written a book, I failed grade 12 English.

When my younger self looks at what I've accomplished today.

It'S a stark contrast to where I was growing up. You know, And I was 15, I bought a, you know, $500 79 Mustang from a neighbor that was this brutal tan color and had this silver door and I was pumping gas at the gas station, sneaking out every single night to go to my girlfriend's house and go to parties and was, you know, not prioritizing academics, not prioritizing my health. Was, you know, I was in okay shape because I worked out a whole bunch, but I was eating garbage, I was misera, didn't have direction, didn't know what I was going to do with my life. And I'll never forget at this one moment and there was a, there was a couple of moments working at this job, I was working for this construction company in central Alberta in Canada and I, you know, I sort of grew up in, in Central Alberta which is, you know, I think in, in many ways it's a great place to grow up, but it's also a hard place, you know, like if you grow up in, I Think, you know, in Central America there's some beautiful aspects to it. There's some incredible pieces about growing up in the sort of like the quote unquote Rust belt. But it's also can be very hard, you know, it can be a hard place. And I remember getting out of high school, I had to go back and actually redo biology and English because I had failed them both. Because I was just out partying all the time. I had no idea what I was going to do, didn't know if I was going to go into college or university.

No real inclination about what I wanted to do for a vocation or a career. I didn't really have much going on. I was pretty average in every way, shape and form. You know, I, I never really committed to academics, I never really committed to, to sports, putting effort into anything. And so here I was, this like 20 something year old kid working construction. And when I got out of high school I started working construction in the gravel pits. And the gravel pits in Alberta are basically where all the aggregate material comes from for the foundations of, you know, underneath roads and buildings and whatnot. And so it's a very interesting place because it's, it's pretty lonely, it's pretty isolating. You don't, you're not working with a big crew of people. There's maybe like two or three, sometimes four other guys that you're working with. And those guys, the men that I was working with, were largely the miserable human beings. Like they hated themselves, they hated their lives, they hated their relationships. You know, they were drunk most of the time, smoking cigarettes, doing drugs, gambling, and just generally hated life. You know, felt like life had really been hard to them and that life was out to get them. And I remember being this young kid in this environment. I remember having this conversation once with one of the guys who'd been working construction, working with, you know, in this, in this industry, in this gravel pit for like 20 years. And he was just so miserable and he would just sit up in this tower and smoke cigarettes literally all day long. He was haggard, right? He was in his like early 50s, but he looked like he could have been 80. And I kind of had this moment where I remember like that could really seriously be me. You know, I could see myself in 20, 30 years being miserable, hating my life, not liking where I was, not feeling in control of anything, feeling overly domesticated, not feeling like there's any direction in my life, not feeling like I have any control over anything, that I can influence anything, and really feeling just Fucking stuck in this position, like I have no influence over it whatsoever. And the reality was is that the direction that my life was heading was. Was going to go down that path. You know, I could very clearly see it if I stayed in that town, if I stayed working that job, I would be the guy who, you know, got drunk on weekends, was basically drunk from Friday until Sunday night, maybe watched football or hockey, played some beer league, smoked cigarettes, ate junk food, and just checked out from life, you know, just kind of checked out. And the sad thing is, and I'm not saying that those industries are bad or wrong, there are some phenomenal people that work trades. You know, I went on to go and work with a different branch of the company and go and build sidewalks, and I got to work in the concrete, in the cement crew. And, you know, some of those guys were phenomenal. Some of them were just amazing. I'm not saying that the trades is, you know, a dead end or is a bad thing. There's. I love it. You know, just the other day I was outside doing landscaping in my yard and I was like, I love this, you know, using my body in this way and working this way. But anyway, I could see that there wasn't really a lot of direction in my life. And there was a lot of things that I felt out of control of. You know, I didn't have my finances in order, my health was not in order. I didn't take care of my body, I didn't take care of my relationships. And so there's a couple key things that I want to share with you that radically changed the trajectory of my life to where I am today. You know, having built incredibly successful companies, the one. The one that I run specifically right now, having traveled the world, have, you know, having a wonderful relationship with this beautiful house that we've built. So I want to share some of the things that altered the change. Altered the trajectory of my life. And the first one that really I needed to work on in order to kind of get my shit together and really put me on a different path was to create an internal environment of appreciation and gratitude, AKA to change the way. To better the way that I spoke to myself as a man. The reality is that if you could get into my thoughts and hear the way I talked to myself when I was in my early 20s, it was vicious, it was violent, it was harsh, it was abusive, it was degrading and shitty, shaming and judgmental. And it was a really brutal place to be because I had grown up in this environment being Taught that to be disciplined is to be punished. And so how I tried to get myself to do things, to get out of bed in the morning, to go to the gym, to eat healthy, was to literally berate and beat the living crap out of myself. I literally thought that, that if I could just beat the shit out of myself hard enough that I would get better results. And you know, you've probably heard me talk about this before in the past where I've talked about shame based motivation, but in reality, this dark motivation or the shame based motivation, it did not work because I always felt like there was something wrong with me. I never really appreciated or had gratitude for the things that I would do or the things that I would accomplish. There was no celebration, there was just, you need to do more, you need to do better. And so I was constantly pursuing this moving target, you know, that I could never celebrate. And I think the most damaging piece was that no one really knew how bad it was to be inside of me. And I think that's the case for most men, most guys that a lot of them. What I've learned over the last decade in working with men is that so many men's internal dialogue is so unhealthy and so violent and vicious and abusive and self deprecative that of course they're not getting the results that they want in work, right? If you're a man that's watching this and the way that you talk to yourself to try and get better results, to try and get you out of bed in the morning, or to go to the gym, or to get the six pack or to eat healthier, to put down the chips at night or not eat the ice cream or whatever it is, if the way that you talk to yourself is to try and beat the crap out of yourself, it might work short term, it might work once in a while. But as a long term plan, it will fail you every single time. As a long term plan, it will fail you. Imagine trying to get a child to do something by talking to them the way that you talk to yourself. Imagine trying to get the teenage version of you to do something the way that you talk to yourself. Now I'm not saying that it should be all rainbows and sunshine and self love. And I'm not saying that at all. I'm simply saying that the likelihood that if you created an internal ecosystem, an internal structure of appreciating yourself when you get your ass out of bed in the morning and you don't want to, of having gratitude for dragging your ass to the gym when all you wanted to do was sit on the couch and watch Netflix. When you can start to have gratitude and appreciation for the things that you are doing, you will start to reinforce that behavior. You will start to reinforce the benefit of that behavior. Your brain will start to release dopamine, you'll start to produce serotonin in response to that. And so your body and your mind will actually begin to shift when you have that system of gratitude and appreciation in place. Now here's the thing, here's the caveat and catch that I think everybody knows about. If you are still doing.

Stupid crap, if you're still making terrible decisions, it is hard to be grateful and appreciative when overwhelmingly what you are doing are the things that you don't want to be doing. Right? Eating the cheeseburger at 9:30 at night right from McDonald's, it's like, I don't want to be doing that. It's hard to have gratitude and appreciation when your actions aren't matching the direction that you're wanting to move as a man. And so I'm going to touch on that in a second. But one of the things that we, that, that I want to sort of get into next is use your body. Really use your body. The majority of men need to be able to use, use their body. And for me this is working out five, six days a week. And I have a bunch of different workouts. You know, I think one of the reasons why I gravitated towards construction was I really love the physicality of it. Shoveling, laying concrete, carrying around these giant forms for the sidewalk, running the bobcat, carrying motors. Like there was something about using the physicality in my body when I was working construction that was wonderfully fulfilling. Like I loved that. And I think for every man, a huge pillar that can shift his perspective in life is when he finds an avenue of working his body, whether it's Brazilian jiu jitsu or martial arts or going to the gym and lifting heavy, heavy weights. For me it's a combination of all of those things. I will lift heavy weights, I will do cardio, I'll do some rocking, I'll put on a weighted vest and go for a five kilometer hike. I do Muay Thai every single week. And so as I've over the years really doubled down on my physical health, on creating this relentless.

Commitment towards using my body right. Like even during the pandemic, I would go find boulders, big ass rocks out on the property that we were, that we were on. And I Would do squats and I would do overhead lifts with them, and I would do burpees with them. And, you know, I would do sprints outside. Like, I didn't let that stuff stop me, right? Gyms were closed, couldn't go to the gym. I didn't let it stop me. But being able to do that on a regular basis has reinforced a couple things. One, I can do hard things. It teaches me I can do hard things. And two, that I have a commitment to something, AKA my body, that I'm returning to on a regular basis. And for a lot of guys, this, like, inconsistency. And I did this for a long time, right? I was inconsistent. I would work out, you know, once a week and then four times the next week and then not for a couple weeks. And it was just all over the map. And I had a lot of frustration around it because I wanted. I knew that a big part of what was going to put me on the right path towards success was dedication and commitment to using my body in this way. And so that's another pillar. Prioritize it. Make it a priority. Because the reality is that our culture and our society today makes it very easy for you as a man to be wildly domesticated, right? I mean, society almost promotes sitting on the couch watching the Netflix or the Disney plus or the Amazon prime, like, whatever, you know, hbo, Max, like, no, they're not sponsoring me, right? But like, it almost promotes you sitting there being complacent, right? Sitting at your desk for eight hours a day, sitting there at night for a few hours, watching tv, eating the garbage food, pumping the pharmaceuticals into your body. The reality is that the system that we inhabit right now in our modern life, while there's some amazing things to it, is designed and set up to make you as a man, soft, weak and complacent, right? We can also see this in testosterone levels, right? I think between two, I think it was 2002 and 2020, we saw testosterone levels drop by like 60%. So the average man's T level testosterone levels, which are important for your energy, which are important for your bone structures, which are important for your sexual health, which are important for your levels of motivation and getting shit done, our T levels are down significantly. So if you're putting garbage into your body and garbage into your brain, right, by watching stupid content all the time, then your entire system is just being taxed and flushed. And with.

Psychological toxins, with physical, biological toxins that are going to repress your system and they are not going to set you up for success, for pursuing the goals, for building the business, for being the best father, for kicking ass in your relationship and really being grounded and being able to have meaningful friendships in your life. You're just not going to have energy or drive for any of that. So use your damn body. So that's the second one. The third one that I found to be really helpful and also extremely challenging was meditating or journaling every single day, one or the other. I. I don't. I don't think that you have to do one specifically. I usually oscillate back and forth between the two. Sometimes I'll meditate, sometimes I'll journal, and I'll kind of just, you know, tune into, like, whatever I need during that day. Or some days I just need to sit and close my eyes and breathe. I'll go outside into my, you know, into nature, and I'll just do a meditation or I'll journal. Here's why it changed the game for me. I know, unequivocally that the reason why most men are lonely but never take solitude, right? They're lonely, but they're on. They're playing computer games or video games, right? You're lonely, but you're watching TV all the time. You're lonely, but you're chatting with chicks on Instagram. And don't take solitude. The reason why meditation is actually so hard for the majority of people is that when you close your eyes and breathe and tune in internally, what you're left with is the reality of who you are and the reality of the thoughts about your life. And so the majority of men are running from meditation because they don't want to confront or be confronted by the truth of their internal state. Because that voice inside that I was talking about in the beginning, that shit talks, that is abusive. That's vicious and judgmental. It can be really, really loud. And I remember when I first started trying to meditate, probably 12 years ago, I hated it. I hated it. I was like, this is the stupidest thing. People just sit here and close their damn eyes and breathe. And what I realized was that meditation was bringing me into direct confrontation with the discomfort, the discomfort that I was carrying around and living with all the time. All the time. The discomfort of anxiety or anger or frustration or bitterness or confusion or loneliness. As soon as I would sit down to meditate, my brain, it was almost like the volume just got, like, turned straight up. And it was so loud. And that is exactly why it is a must, because being able to temper and build some kind of Tolerance towards that internal state, that internal sense of noise is a kind of superpower. Most people are so disconnected from what's happening internally within them that they're just reacting from it constantly. They're not free, right? They're not free men. They are constantly reacting to stimulus that's coming in externally with the experience that they're having in response to it. And then they're reacting from that place, right? Your girlfriend says something, you know, that you don't like or reminds you that you forgot to take out the garbage, and boom, you feel angry. And boom, you react from that anger. That meditation helps you to create some type of space between the external stimulus and your response to that stimulus. And this is what it means to be grounded and regulated as a man. And I guarantee you, I promise you this one thing, Grounding, meditation and journaling, right? Being able to get my thoughts out onto a page, being able to see those things, what I was thinking about, how I was feeling, what was going on in my life.

These two things radically altered the course of my life because I started to get a sense of who I actually was, what I was actually thinking, what I was actually feeling. And I could begin to work with it or question it. And the reality is that for most men, they are just a ball of reacting to external stimuli and internal sensations. And when you can begin to see the stimuli coming in and the internal sensations and reactivity in response to that, you can begin to have a choice about how you respond. And what I think, and what I fundamentally believe is that men who are grounded, men who are not just a massive bundle of reactivity reacting to comments on the Internet and dislikes and the bullshit on the news, men that are actually rooted and grounded and can slow down their internal narrative and dialogue and understand what they're experiencing and be able to navigate hard, conflict oriented conversations and situations are going to be so needed in the next decade. Like that in itself is going to be a kind of purpose that I think is under indexed and undervalued right now. Families are going to need it. Women are going to want it. I mean, they already do. They're already, you know, just flock towards men that are grounded and calm and peaceful internally, that have this type of experience. So start to develop that piece. It's something that was really super hard for me. I can expand on it at some point. The next pieces are pretty simple and straightforward. The next piece is Consume the better Content. Consume better fucking content. Like, for the love of God, just like what you put into your body matters. For how you feel energetically. What you put into your mind is so important. If you're sitting there watching Fresh and fit on YouTube or watching these channels that are just shit talking women and you know, talking about drama and getting into conspiracies and all this other type of nonsense. Not only are you wasting time, but you are caught in this again, this reactivity, this sort of toxic nonsense, this toxic polarization that has taken a stronghold over our culture. So read, read, read, read, read, read, read Books. I try and read between 50 and 70 books every single year now. I've taken breaks from that. Sometimes I will listen to the audiobooks, right? I'll listen to a book instead of reading it, but consume better content. Consume content that's interesting and fascinating and like, you know, I'll listen to a book about time or quantum mechanics or, you know, not that I understand quantum mechanics, but I find it fun, fascinating. I'll listen to a book, you know, from somebody like John o', Donohue, who is an Irish poet who will, you know, be writing blessings about marriage and life and fatherhood. You know, read outside of your field of interest. If you're somebody like me who's very interested in entrepreneurship and success and greatness and mastery, Read books that are outside of that. Consume content that's outside of that, right? Go into cars and astrophysics and art and music, like get into the things that you're curious about and consume content in those fields. Because when you begin to expand your horizon and consume content that piques curiosity, it will make you look at things in a different way. And if you're just stuck watching the same BS content and the same content that is polarizing and, you know, meant to get you to click on something and clickbait, then you're just gonna be stuck in this cycle of people feeding you information that is literally designed to try and hold your attention, right? Notice that this video now is like 24 minutes long. I've told you stories about myself, about my life. I'm not trying to do anything that's going to like, you know, there's no cutaway scenes, there's none of that kind of stuff. It's just if you want this, here it is, right? So start to consume better content and really tune into the content that you're watching. Because I see a lot of young men messaging me asking me about, you know, these platforms that, that are hyper polarizing, that are, you know, oftentimes degrading about women, that are, you know, news based stuff that's getting them Caught up into all types of like political nonsense and it's oftentimes a waste of time. You know, if you're, if you're a young man or if you're a man of any age and your life isn't in some way, shape or form in order like my, my life, you know, my desk is messy right now as I'm looking at it, but my life is in pretty good order. My business is in good order, my finances are in good order, my family is in good order, my health is in good order. Now I have some solid ground to stand on, to go and confront some of the nonsense that's out there, to go and talk about politics, to go and address those types of things. But if you don't have a solid foundation to stand on, right? If you don't feel like any of your house is in order, your health, your finances, your relationship, if all that's a mess and you feel out of control, part of the thing that's feeding it is that type of content, right? Where you can sit in the, you know, the YouTube chat and make comments and shit talk people, or go on Reddit and shit talk people. That type of stuff is just a waste of time. It is a distraction that is meant to domesticate you. There are so many distractions in our world today that feed into the over domestication of men. So consume better content. Next is replace coping mechanisms with generative habits. This is a huge one for me. Maybe you've heard me talk about it before. I'm going to keep this very simple. A coping mechanism is something that you feel like you need in order to feel better, in order to feel better about what you're experiencing. So a coping mechanism might be smoking weed, drinking porn, video games, ice cream at 10 o' clock at night, right? Popcorn at 11:30. Those are coping mechanisms, right? So begin to replace those coping mechanisms with habits that are more generative. Breath work, stretching, yoga, working out, reading, meditation, journaling, right? There's a number of them that we've been talking about. So begin to replace those coping mechanisms. Focus on one at a time. Don't try and replace five coping mechanisms all at once, focusing on one at a time. So for example, something like pornography, it took me years to actually quit. It actually took me years to stop watching it. I think this is the thing that most men don't talk about, is that there are certain coping mechanisms that you've likely been using for years and years and years and years and years. And it's become so ingrained that it's not going to be like, oh, I watched this one YouTube video and all of a sudden I was able to quit. It's like, no, you're probably going to have to work on letting go of that Covid mechanism for a long time. Next is work on your mission or your business or your purpose every single day. Every single day. Even if it's just for five minutes or 15 minutes, work on your mission, your vision, your purpose, or your business. Every single day. Every single day, I will sit down and I will do a little bit of writing about where my purpose is at, where my business is at, what I want to create, what I'm building next year, what I'm building into the future. What next big project do I want to take on? How do I want to push my edge? You know, I remember back in, I think it was 2018, I had this idea, or 2017, I had this idea to do this big conference with like 1500 people. And I wanted to have real talk in and around business and entrepreneurship. And so I set this big, hairy, audacious goal to hire Gary Vaynerchuk and have him come to Vancouver and speak at an event that I was going to speak on stage at. I set this really big, audacious goal that felt way out of my league. And in pursuing it, what I realized as I did that was that I had to work on my business and my vision every single day because otherwise it was going to cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars. Like, I was literally, I was putting everything on the line. If the event went well, then I was going to do well financially. If the event went poorly, I was going to go bust. I was going to go bankrupt for sure. I was going to lose a lot of money. And so it was one of those things where I started to talk about my business every day. I started to share with friends what I was doing. I started to, you know, emails, calls, that kind of stuff. Writing about what I wanted to talk about, what I wanted Gary Vaynerchuk to talk about, who else I wanted to have on stage. And it fueled this fire within me where I was like, oh, I really love building and creating every single day. And so now I work on my business, on my purpose, on my mission, every single day. And if you don't have a business, if you're not sure what your purpose is, that is okay. Let your quest, I think this is one of the things that most people don't talk about enough. Let your quest to find purpose be a purpose in and of itself, right? The adventure towards understanding what our purpose is, what our meaning for being here is, you know, what actually is meaningful in our life. That quest can act as a substitute purpose for some period of time. Also, your. Your development of self leadership, right? Developing the skills to lead yourself more effectively, that can also be a purpose for a period of time. That was my purpose, you know, after I bottomed out, after I lost my relationship and I slept in the back of my car, which I've talked about in my book Men's Work. My main purpose in life, my main mission in life was to get my shit together and was to heal and it was to understand how the abuses in my childhood led to some really poor maladaptive mechanisms and behaviors and choices in my adult life. And so in. In just allowing myself the space of, when it was a few years, I allowed myself a few years to say, I don't know what my purpose is, but I'm going to let myself, let my purpose and my mission for right now be my own development. I think that there is something inherently.

Masculine within that in the sense that for a lot of men, if you don't feel like you are the man that you want to be, if you don't feel like you've built the life that you want to have, or the relationship that you want, or the body that you want, the pursuit of that development can act as a purpose for a period of time, and that can be incredibly rewarding and fulfilling. And out of that can grow a much larger sense of purpose, a much larger sense of mission or meaning or vision. And I think this is something that is not talked about often enough, that for most men at some point in their life, their main purpose is going to be their development. Developing the leadership qualities, the skills of communication or setting boundaries or saying no or, you know, digging through the hard shit in their past, that will be a deep and meaningful sense of purpose that can open the door to a much larger sense of purpose and mission in your life. Last piece, and I'm going to wrap it up. Please don't forget to share this man it forward with somebody that you know will enjoy it. But last piece that I want to share is start to socialize with more people, people outside of your comfort zone, people that you disagree with, people that have different perspectives and life paths to offer you. You know, I think one of the things that I've really been grateful for over the years is that when I started Man Talks, it started as an event, as an event series where I would have men come in three Men per event, and they would share their greatest defining moments within 20 minutes as if they were going to die tomorrow. So the whole premise was, if you were going to die tomorrow.

What stories and what lessons would you want the world to know? And when I was doing these events, I traveled all over North America. We held events in Vancouver and Calgary and Edmonton, in Toronto and New York and LA and Miami, Seattle, all over North America. And I got to meet people from all walks of life, all backgrounds, all races, ethnicities, languages, religious preferences. And it was so fascinating to me to interact and learn from people and talk to people who I would normally not have a chance to hear from or connect to. And I think one of the things that I really loved when I worked at Apple was a very similar thing, you know, and, and over my life when I. I mean, another example is I went from working construction to singing classical music. You know, I was singing opera. And so I've been fortunate to be in some radically different fields where different types of people normally inhabit them. You know, the guy that's working construction is usually very different from the guy that has a subscription to go to his local opera, you know, every single week. Like, that's just the reality of it. And then that's a different person than, you know, who's. Who's got an MBA in business and is working at Apple. Right? So I've had the fortune to meet such a broad spectrum of people and has given me a much bigger vision or a much bigger lens to look through when it comes to interacting with people. And I think that this is something that more and more less men have the opportunity to engage in. And so whether you do this by traveling and taking in different cultures, whether you do this by going out, you know, spending three to six months and just looking at your city and saying, I'm going to go to all of these different events, even though they're not events that I have any interest in and they're not events that I would normally ever go to, just like, go to as many of them as possible, socialize with as many people as possible, and just stay open and curious, really, really curious to get to know the people that are there. That type of social skill, you know, when you look at the men that are successful in today's world and likely the men that you enjoy watching, you know, whether, whether it's the, the sort of Instagram YouTube sensations like the Andrew Tates or the Bedros K or the Tony Robbins or the Brendan Bouchards or, you know, whoever it is, right? The people that you like to watch and learn from, they likely have had exposure to so many different people that they're able to start to see the patterns that emerge within people. And they're also able to understand how different people think and make choices and decisions and engage. And regardless of what you want to do with your life, whether, you know, you want to work a 9 to 5 in a, you know, in a bank, or, you know, you want to run your own business or whatever it is, that skill set, that understanding of people is going to go a long way because the average man has missed out on that. The average man has lived a very solitary, isolated life where he doesn't have a broader perspective on culture and on people. And so when he's inundated with the polarization of our modern times, he can't oftentimes understand where those people are coming from. And if you can become a man who understands where most people are coming from, that is a certain type of skill and potency and power that, again, I think the world is going to need. And as on an individual level, it's incredibly. You know, you talk about a lot of men who are trying to build confidence. There is nothing more confidence inducing than knowing that you can walk into any room in almost any country with almost any type of person and be able to have a meaningful dialogue and conversation with them. I know almost unequivocally that if you put me in any space with almost any person, whether it's a guy that runs a hedge fund worth $5 billion or, or a janitor at a school, I can have a phenomenal conversation with that person because of my life experience, because I have pushed my edge in being able to expand myself socially. And this the last thing that I'll say, I'll just say don't do it for this reason. But the last thing that I'll say is that that is incredibly enticing and somewhat intoxicating for women because a lot of men don't know how to operate under different social circumstances. And a man who is comfortable within himself in any social situation is a huge draw and hugely appealing to a lot of women. I mean, think about, like, somebody like James Bond, right? James Bond can walk into any environment and, like, steal the show and be the star in the room. And that is confidence, right? It's the ability to be comfortable within yourself under any social circumstance or situation or environment. So get out, socialize with different people. You never know, you might meet some interesting men, some interesting women. Maybe a relationship will come out of it? I don't know. But anyway, thank you so much for tuning in. Comment below. If you're watching this on YouTube, don't forget to subscribe. If you are watching this on YouTube or if you're listening on Spotify or itunes, subscribe and man it forward so that somebody that you know will be able to dive into this conversation. And until next week, this is Connor Beaton signing off.