How To Silence Your Inner Critic (Men's Work session)

There's two main things. So the first one is about that inner critic. This is a very common one for a lot of people, is when we don't express our anger, it becomes self directed. Right. So I'm just going to get you to write that. That part down. When I don't express my anger in a healthy way, it becomes self directed. So I want you to explore your inner critic by first and foremost understanding what it's saying and who it sounds like. What is my inner critic saying, and who does it sound like?

My.

Gut says that your inner critic is a version of your father that occupies a lot of space and territory in your head. 100. Yeah. So the second part of that is, is what would it sound like for me to set boundaries and stand up to my inner critic? Now, again, that's not throwing the baby out with the bathwater. That's not saying, my inner critic's a piece of garbage and I don't want to listen to it and I hate it and I'm going to try and kill it. That's not it. That's going to make it a hell of a lot worse because you're just going to go to war with this part of you. It's actually about doing the thing that you wanted to do with dad. It's setting a boundary with it and being able to say, okay, that's enough. That's enough. Like, no more shaming, no more regret. That's enough. Is there truth in what it's saying, and can I take anything from it, or do I just need to set a boundary? So that's what I want you to take. Is there a truth in what my inner critic is saying, or do I simply need to set a boundary? Because sometimes our inner critic is trying to help us, it's trying to protect us, it's trying to point us in the right direction. It's trying to remind us of how we want to operate. And other times, it's just a repetition of an abusive pattern or an unhelpful pattern or a maladaptive pattern.

And so just beginning to discern, like, is that even helpful? No, it's not helpful. All right, that's enough. That's good. And use that verbiage. Right? That's enough. So that's part one. Part two is I want you to practice daily.

Letting that potency occupy space in your body.

When you're driving, when you're walking through a grocery store, when you're interacting with your partner, when you are doing jiu jitsu.

Right? To Feel some of that energy in the body of your own aliveness and your own.

Capacity to take up space.

Okay, how does that sound? That sounds very doable. Yeah.

So even if you just set an alarm once or twice a day and it says.

Feel the energy take up space, or feel my potency, take up space.

And then breathe and let yourself feel it.

And see if you can transmit some of that. And when I say transmit, I mean you let other people.

In on the game, that you are connected to your own potency. One of the most attractive things to the feminine is a man who is connected to this part and know that he has a healthy relationship to it. It's one of the most attractive things. Women can feel it because a man who is disconnected from his anger is dangerous. And a man who's consumed and overrun by his anger is dangerous. So a man who has a healthy relationship to his anger and can feel that potency and that aliveness within himself is a man who is connected to his own fire. And that is beautifully attractive, Right. Women are like, oh, they get just. Something happens, right? Whenever I'm in that connection in my own body. And, you know, I'll come upstairs after work and I'm all. I'm, like, fired up, and I can feel that aliveness coursing through my body. And I walk into the kitchen or the living room, and my wife's there, and she looks at me, and she's just like, whoa. She notices it every time. Every time.