A psychologist tells Connor Beaton that power dynamics haven't shifted: women still hold more power in relationships because they have more backup options and social networks. Legal incentives like alimony also favor women in divorce.
Chapters
How have you seen power dynamics shift between men and women that are in relationships or dating?
I don't know if I've seen it shift. As a psychologist and a clinician and as an amateur psychologist, even before that, I've always seen that in the vast majority of relationships that women are the more powerful players. Most women have baseline better optionality than men, which is the sense that they don't really have to do anything. Most women, according to the research, have a plan B. If not a plan C, D, E, F and G. If plan A doesn't work out, they have the their fitness instructor. They have that guy that they soft nexted years ago who might be orbiting in the background. With men, it's much more difficult. The average man has a bevy of women who are like circulating around him, waiting for him to become single. So women have this higher passive optionality than men do and that gives them more power, especially under the terms of the marriage contract. Generally, we know that alimony flows from men to women in the separation and many women are incentivized to divorce for cash and prizes.