Connor Beaton coaches men on how to respond when their partner is upset. Don't take it personally, don't rush to fix it. Most of the time she needs to vent and be heard. Being a harbor, not a fixer, is the skill that matters.
Stop taking her emotions so personally. Most men try and lead emotionally in relationship by solving your girlfriend's problems, your wife's issues by trying to fix it, by trying to make them feel better, by jumping through hoops to try and figure out how you can rectify the issue for them. I'm going to give you the 80, 20 to rule. 80% of the time it's the latter. 80% of the time she's going to want you to be that harbor, that place where she can bring some of her frustrations, her emotions to vent some of those things, talk about some of those things. And you might be of service to her by saying, hey, you know what? I think this is one of those things that you should definitely go talk to your girlfriend about. Even if she's angry with you, can you be okay with her being upset? Can you be okay with her being disappointed? Right. This is a very, very deep practice in a relationship. And what can be so powerful is you being okay with them not being okay.
How to Raise Strong, Unshakable Boys in Today's Culture, with Dr. Shefali Tsabary
