Short YouTube monologue by Connor Beaton advising men to stop seeking external validation (particularly from women) and to build internal mechanisms of self-appreciation and self-recognition. The speaker contrasts outsourcing validation (seeking feedback from others) with 'insourcing' self-worth and recommends creating a rigorous self-recognition practice in 2025.
Stop seeking validation from women from external sources. Now, I call this stop outsourcing validation and start insourcing validation. So what a lot of guys do, because we're very external, is they outsource validation, outsource the reinforcement of their own self worth. I'm not sure if I'm worthy. I'm not sure if I'm good enough. I'm not sure if I'm smart enough. I'm not sure if I'm attractive enough. And what they do is they try and deploy this mechanism of getting feedback from people at work, from friends, from family members, and they try and get validation to fill up their internal lack of I don't feel good enough. There's one thing that you can really start doing in 2025, it is to build a rigorous mechanism of self appreciation and self recognition. So stop outsourcing that validation and start insourcing that self recognition and appreciation.
How to Raise Strong, Unshakable Boys in Today's Culture, with Dr. Shefali Tsabary
