A short conversation in which Connor Beaton asks how men can support women who feel disconnected from their sexual desire. Speaker B explains that women often need to feel safe to explore sexuality, framing sexuality as an area that can feel dangerous and fear-inducing, and noting parallels with men’s relationship to danger and safety.
How can a man start to support a woman that he's with who maybe isn't as fully connected to her arousal, her desire? When I ask her what she wants to explore, what she wants to do or how she wants to feel, there's just blank stares and question marks. For a lot of guys that's very, very challenging. So I'd love to hear your take on some of that.
Women feel safer to uncover and explore and realize that they are not alone and that it's okay and it's safe to be a sexual being. And there's a hurdle that sometimes can't be jumped over inside of the male female relationship because she just actually doesn't feel safe enough within herself to even bring that to him yet. But I know that men can relate with the nice guy bad boy thing and their relationship to their danger, their savagery and the safety around that. The equivalent of that for women is sexuality. That's the part that has felt dangerous.
How to Raise Strong, Unshakable Boys in Today's Culture, with Dr. Shefali Tsabary
