Connor Beaton (YouTube, "Take Control of Your Triggers") explains the three primary urges that drive many men’s porn use: boredom (time-of-day contexts), repetition/predictable habitual use, and negative emotional states (loneliness, depression, anxiety, anger). He frames these as central triggers that create strong urges and suggests tracking when boredom occurs and implementing alternative behaviors.
What's driving your urges? From what I've seen and the work that I've done with probably a couple thousand men now to quit porn, there are three very simple urges that drive a man's porn usage. Boredom is going to be a big trigger point for most of you guys that are out there. And for some of you, that boredom might be in the morning, it might be in the afternoon, it might be at night. But really taking stock of when am I actually bored throughout the day, is there something that I can implement to ensure that when I start to get bored, I have something else to do? Repetition. It's a predictable porn and porn usage. Watching it is a predictable and repeatable habit that alters your mood or alters your state when you are feeling something that you don't like. You're lonely, you're depressed, you're anxious, you're angry, you're in a low state that you're going to be very susceptible and having a big urge to watch porn. These are like the three horsemen that are really pushing forward the campaign to watch porn.
How to Raise Strong, Unshakable Boys in Today's Culture, with Dr. Shefali Tsabary
