The Rise of Angry Male Internet Gurus

So it seems like some of you have noticed that there's this trend in rising terrible Internet male gurus. These guys that are, like, very combative, they seem to be angry all the damn time. Like, it doesn't seem to be any other emotion other than anger. And they seem to be telling young men, like, I'll teach you how to be rich and I'll teach you how to get more puss, and I'll teach you how to be a Sigma or an alpha male, or you two can drive a Bugatti and cruise around in your Audi, just like me, if only you follow my framework. This Internet male guru, for me is the quintessential rise that happens amongst young men when there are no elders present, when a type of mature masculinity has vacated the cultural conversation to such a detrimental degree that what rises to the top that as a male role model to teach men, is this kind of youthful, adolescent, angry, hostile version of what it means to be a man, lacking mostly in grounding, limitations, endings, boundaries, respect for others, most specifically women. And yet these guys seem to be getting a ton of attention. I can't tell you how many times I go through my comments on YouTube and see comments from you guys that are like, I can't believe your channel isn't bigger. And I, I hope that, you know, a million soon and stuff like that. And while I appreciate the love and respect and we just hit 80,000, which is incredible, what I've come to realize is that there, there's a real big gap in the market for very grounded conversations around what it means to be a man. And there's a gap because of a few things. Number one, it's not sexy and exciting. It's not inflammatory. It doesn't trigger you internally. It doesn't cause you to have some like, yeah, I gotta go to fight, I gotta go to battle. This is the definition of adolescent masculinity. Adolescent masculinity is trying to sort itself out through battle by going to war with another. And when you see some of these channels, like Fresh and Fit, they are constantly in a type of battle or war with other channels, with these other guys that they never meet in person, they never fight, they never throw down. I mean, it's absolutely ridiculous. You know, like, I grew up in Central Alberta, which is like the bar fighting capital of the world. Like, this is what you did on Friday and Saturday night. You would meet up with a buddy at his house, or yours, more likely an apartment or a condo, because nobody had any money. And you would Drink really terrible crappy beer or really terrible crappy rum or really terrible crappy whiskey. And you'd get half in the bag, and then you'd go to the bar, and you would decide on the way to the bar whether or not you were going to get into a fight. Literally, you would be talking about it in the car. Was like, okay, is tonight's mission to go and try and get laid and to try and pick up women? Or is tonight's mission we are going to go get into a fight? How are we actually feeling? How's the collective manosphere, we want to call it that actually feeling with the, like four or five dudes that were in the car or the taxi on the way to the bar. And then you would decide what you're going to do. This is the essence of. Of adolescent masculinity. Because adolescent masculinity, there's a certain type of virility to it. There's a certain type of energetic potency to it that is uncontained and unbridled and fierce and volat and powerful and potent. And it can be intoxicating. It can be intoxicating. And it's intoxicating specifically for those who haven't learned how to wield it, how to point it in a direction that is actually beneficial to themselves, their loved ones or their community and the world at large. And so what ends up happening is that when you are inundated with that type of energy or you're so disconnected from it that you've completely forgotten what it feels like to have a virility with within you, a type of potency within you as a man that feels fierce, that feels like. Without being too. Without being too descriptive, like, you could fuck the world up, that if you're so disconnected from that and no one's ever really allowed you to express that or feel that within yourself, but you know that it's there because you've connected to it before, you will seek out those who are trying to speak about it. And so what's happened in our culture and what I think is taking place within the masculine conversation is that there is such a. Such a vacancy of mature masculinity that young men are turning to what they think is mature masculinity. They're turning towards the men who are yelling the loudest from the top of the hill. They're turning towards the men who are pretending to. To have it together, it figured out. And the mark of really adolescent masculinity is reckless certainty. Reckless certainty. Because here's what any man will tell you. The masculine within you, right? That that masculine drive and force within you, that linear, logical, rational part of you desires and demands certainty, blind certainty. It wants to know at all costs. And that's what some of these guys are selling. It's a framework. It's a structure that provides you with the type of certainty as a man that lets you just rest, that lets you not have to really think about things or worry about things or be in awe of things, or enter into the territory of the unknown or the uncharted, or the territory that seems uncertain to you. You never have to go into that realm anymore because everything's packaged up in a nice little bow written in a book or a course or a program that has been sold to you for five or ten thousand dollars. And that what a beautiful gift that must be to just have that certainty served up to you. But this vacancy of male role models, of masculine role models that embodies a type of mature masculinity. And let me be clear, I'm not saying that I am that role model. I'm that I am that mature man. Yet I hope to be one day. I hope that I'm on that path. But what I can tell you is that I have sat with men over and over again that are truly elders, that embody a type of mature masculinity that has room for questions, that embraces the uncertainty that is present to the unknown in every single moment in relationship and conversation. And it's palatable, it is poignant, it is absolutely powerful. When you are around a mature, grounded man who isn't so whisked away into some battle, who isn't so quick to anger and be aggressive, who isn't so quick to promote violence in a fight at the drop of a hat. Because that man has been through battle. That man has seen hell in a lot of different ways. Psychologically, emotionally, physically, and maybe even spiritually. And that vacancy of mature masculinity opens the door for these type of men to come in and say, I've found the solution. Here's how you do the one thing that you're really wanting to do, which is find status, to gain status. Because let me be honest with you and be super, super truthful. If I was 19 today, I be tuning into these channels. I would be tuning into them. Because there's that vacancy. Because there's a lack of male role models, because there is a rising economic hardship, because there's a largely negative cultural outlook on men and masculinity. Unless it happens to be being embodied by a woman. I'd probably be down this path too. I would be an angry, disgruntled, lost young man going through young man syndrome, causing chaos, causing hardship, trying to figure my life out, trying to figure out what to do with the copious amounts of energy and aggression and volatility that lived within my body and my mind without really a guide to help me chart my course. And I would turn to people like this who'd say, direct it towards making as much money as you can, or getting with as many women as you can, or stockpiling as much money as you can to buy all the assets that you can. Because what you need as a man is status. What you need as a man is status. This is what so many of these men are preaching. It's behind every video that they create, it's behind every commentary that they create. And even when you watch, when you watch some of these things where it's like two guys and then 10 onlyfans, girls, you know, or like, there's eight only fans girls and two of them are in porn. And you're. These guys are like talking to these women about relationships and they're trying to espouse these sort of semi quasi conservative views that they're not really actually living. When you dig into their lives. I mean, you know, I won't even get into some of the drama that these guys have gotten themselves into. They don't live it, they're hypocritical. But they're espousing these sort of semi or quasi conservative views because they're trying to help men in some way develop a sense of status. But here's the catch. Real men who have a very high value set in our culture, real men who have a massive amount of status, they are not out there selling you on developing status. They're not doing that, right? I have worked with some of the top entrepreneurs, some of the top athletes, some of the top musicians, men that run hedge funds and are worth billions and billions of doll. Men that run real estate empires, men that have massive political sway, men that have real status in our culture. Guess what? They never talk about their fucking status. They never talk about it. Men that have real status don't talk about their status. They just don't do it. Because that's the beta thing to do, right? That's the immature thing to do. They're not talking about those things. They are out there building, they're out there creating. And yes, there's merit in helping young men who are lost the thing that gets me about what makes these guys so damn popular, the reason why these Internet, male Internet gurus that have all these women in their room and they're talking to them. The things that. That really makes them so popular is a couple things. One, they're constantly surrounded by beautiful women and fancy cars. And let's face it, we as, as young men, I don't know about you, but me as a young man, I loved that shit. I just loved it. You know, it's like something genetically in my DNA. Although I'm sure that there's people that are like, oh, it's purely a social construct. It's like, well, you've never lived with that much testosterone in your body then. But something in me loved fast cars, loud cars, fast motorcycles, beautiful women that was just baked and hardwired into me. And so, one, they're constantly surrounded by those things, which is appealing to other men, right? There's no beautiful women sitting around me in my room. Maybe that diminishes my status in some way. That's okay. But that's the one thing. And the second thing that they do is this very interesting trick that makes them very, very viral online. And I couldn't figure it out for a long time, and so I kind of studied it, and finally I figured out this sort of formula that all these guys use. It's a very, very simple formula, and you could use it, too, to go viral, although I don't know if you should or would want to. The formula is this. You take a very simple truth and you package it up in something that is incredibly inflammatory. You take a very simple truth and you package it up in something that is very inflammatory. You say something along the lines of, a man's life is very hard, simple truth. A lot of men that hear that say, yeah, my life's freaking hard. I'm trying to pay the bills. I'm a construction worker. I'm a laborer. I'm an electrician. I'm a executive. I'm a guy in finance. I'm trying to make life work. It's not easy. It's very hard. I'm trying to raise my family and be a good husband, or, you know, I'm trying to figure out dating. I can't get any attention from women. The majority of men hear that truth, and they say, yeah, that, that's true. And then they wrap it up in an inflammatory statement, like, and that's because of feminism. And boom, it just goes off. Because what ends up happening is you have the guys or the individuals, the men and women that hear the men's lives are hard and they agree with that truth, and they say, yeah, they've got a point. And then you've got all the other people that hear the. That's because of feminism, and they go wild about that. And so no matter who's listening to the message, you've got both of them. You've got the people that agree with you, and you've got the people that disagree with you, and both of them are talking about you. Both of them are spreading and sharing your message. This is the very toxic, unhealthy nature of our current social media climate is that when you say a truth couched in something inflammatory, it has such a viral nature that gets spread all the time. And this is what helps to elevate the status. This is what helps to elevate that person's perceived value within the social media marketplace. Because all of a sudden, you have so many people talking about one individual, right? Andrew Tate was the most Googled person on Earth for a period of time. That's insane. Right? This guy's a former kickboxer. That's pretty much it. He's a former kickboxer who ran an online cam site that hosted women who were cam girls. Right? Like, why is that guy the most Google person on the planet? Well, he figured out that if I say truthful things about men specifically and culture and society and the hardships that men are facing and couch it in inflammatory statements that piss a bunch of people off, everybody is talking about me. So we need to pull back the conversation. We as men need to take a step back and actually ask ourselves, who am I tuning into? Who am I giving my attention to? Who am I giving my time to? Is this helping me to actually mature as a man? And again, I'm not saying that nothing that these guys say has value or isn't true. Quite the contrary. I think that some of the things that these guys are saying are very true and are very helpful for some men. And I also think that some of the things that they're saying are incredibly unhelpful, incredibly unhealthy, and are leading a lot of men down a path of meaninglessness, of not actually having any substance or any real value or any real ethics or morals in their life. And that's not helpful. And again, I'm not saying that I have any of the specific answers. I'm not saying that I am some savior of men and that I have all the things. But what I do know is that the version of me at 19 that would have listened to these men and ate it up and just like with a silver spoon shoveled it into my consciousness, in my mind was the same version of me that needed an elder in my life, that needed a mature man in my life to offer a different perspective, to say, maybe that's not the way. Maybe the getting rich and getting so much ass and being super Sigma all the time, whatever the hell that might mean to any of you out there listening, maybe there's some limitations to being a man. Maybe slowing down and figuring out how to be grounded and not so reactive to every single thing that you hear, maybe learning how to think for yourself or being taught how to learn being taught how to think, which is what our university education and institutions used to do, but don't seem to do that very well anymore, maybe that version of me needed an elder to sit me down and say, you're going to be okay. You're going to go through some really hard times and I'll be here as you go through them. And I think in some ways to wrap this all up, that's what these guys are offering. They're sort of offering a brother like, father like archetype of an individual that so many of the men in our modern culture are missing and lacking. And to me, that's kind of heartbreaking. You know, I know that for me, I would have eaten it up as a young man because there was a vacancy of male role models in my life and my life just didn't get better. Honestly, it got really bad for a long time until I found a man who was quite a bit older and was willing to be a mentor to me, who was willing to.

Speak some sense into my adolescent mind, but also that I had been kind of tossed around by life to such a degree that I was willing to listen to him. And it's really hard if you are a young man who was betrayed or wounded by an older man. Maybe your father left you, maybe he was abusive, maybe he was never around, maybe that's just never been in your life, right? Maybe the man that you saw growing up was spineless, never stood up for himself, didn't have a voice, and so you don't even know what that looks like. And so when you tune into these guys that are hostile and hyper combative and super aggressive and in people's face in a way that isn't even really necessary, and you can be incredibly assertive without needing to be rude, it seems like that's the solution or the antidote to your problems when there is a level of depth and maturity that is beyond that. And so I hope, I hope that what begins to emerge are more mature masculine voices, are more mature men who are saying, this is a possibility, this is a way. I've tried that. I've gone through that adolescence. I've gone through that tumultuousness. It seems sexy. It's really flashy. But one day, you're going to realize it's pretty damn empty. Or if you don't realize that it's pretty damn empty, it's going to empty out you and your life. So share your comments below. If you're watching this on YouTube, man it forward and share this with another man that you think would enjoy this or have something to say about it. And as always, until next week, this is Connor Beaton signing off.