Connor Beaton and a co-speaker explore why people project childhood wounds onto unrelated situations. A man's unresolved pain with his father created trust issues that colored how he saw other men, until deep work on that relationship changed everything.
Why is it that women's nervous systems and brains are more interested in being alone in the woods with a bear than a man? Every dude would way rather be in the woods with another dude than a bear. My wife and I talked about this because I was like, what is the belief there? Like, have you just never been around a bear?
When we store a negative perception about something because something was harmful or painful, we project onto everything. So we're very unbiased about that projection. I think a lot of times it's very common for people to have mother wounds or father wounds. And if you had a father wound, I'll actually speak for myself. I was somebody who had a lot of challenges with my father growing up, did a lot of work on that relationship. It was one of the most healing things I ever did was really work through every little nook and cranny of that relationship and challenges and have a great relationship with my father today. But if you asked me circa like 16 years ago, I would've said like, oh, I don't trust any man because I had trust issues with my father. And that's my own version of the subconscious mind storing something and projecting it out. And then I think we are then inclined as people to overdramatize things when we have pain.
How to Raise Strong, Unshakable Boys in Today's Culture, with Dr. Shefali Tsabary
Anxious, needy, overthinking in love? That's a pattern, and it can change. Check the description 👇
