Why Your Reputation Matters

Regardless of what your family, friends, society might tell you, your reputation as a man is absolutely vital. It's imperative, because your reputation as a man is almost like a business card, a calling card for people that tells them what to expect from you and also tells them who you are. So if you have a reputation for being late, for being lazy, if you have a reputation for being undisciplined, that tells people about who you are, are as a man, that's tied directly to how people will interact with you. It's tied directly to how people will view you and build a relationship with you. It's tied directly to whether or not they can trust you as a man. And so one of the best things that you can do is to look at your reputation, to analyze it very clearly and ask yourself the question, and ask the people around you the question, what do I have a reputation for? Both in a good way and a negative way, right? Because you certainly have some strengths and some attributes that people can rely on you for. Maybe you're somebody that has a reputation for being assertive, for being direct, for having really solid leadership skills. Right? For being able to influence the people around you. I just had Jason Wilson on the show, and that podcast will be coming out in a couple of weeks, but he talked about being on the Joe Rogan show, and he said, I can tell a really good leader, I can tell a really exceptional leader by the team that he has around them and the way that they treat clients and guests. And he said, the moment that I walked into that studio, all of his team were exceptional. They were kind, they were strong, they were assertive, they were direct, they were compassionate, they were really friendly, and they were really great to get along with. But I knew exactly what was expected of me. And he said, that quality of leadership builds a reputation, so you begin to have a reputation of that. And I think one of the interesting things that we see in our culture, in our society today is that when a man comes under attack socially, it's generally his reputation that gets attacked first. Right? It's generally his reputation that gets attacked first. Think about it. That's. That's how important it actually is. So his character and his behavior and what he does, those are the types of things that will get put out about a man when cancel culture comes for him, right? Oh, he's disrespectful or he talks about this way or whatever that might be. So they'll start to undermine his reputation first. So the best thing that you can do for yourself as a man is to begin to look at what is my reputation, what do I have a reputation for? You know, I had to get very clear in my life and my business. One of the hardest things I've had to do in my business was come to terms with the fact that I had a reputation for not, not finishing things in my business, for having a to do list and a task list that I would say, yeah, yeah, I'll get that done tomorrow, and then it wouldn't get done. And, you know, this was a byproduct of me growing up and having very poor education skills. You know, I did not learn the discipline, the skill set of being organized, of being disciplined in my work at school. And so that carried forward into my work, in my entrepreneurship, in my business that I run still to this day. And so I've had to work very hard to break that reputation of being somebody that doesn't follow through on their word because that has an impact on the people that work with me. It has an impact on the way that they perceive my leadership. It has an impact on my wife's ability to trust whether or not I'll follow through with what I, what I say I'm going to do. And so one of the hardest things that I had to do for myself was to ask people around me, what do I have a reputation for in terms of what strengths do I have and what do I have a reputation for never doing? Like, where, where is my reputation being diminished? And it's hard to hear that, right? Because in some ways it's pointing to your deficits, it's pointing to the parts of you where maybe you feel inferior or insecure or you lack strength or you lack certainty or you lack clarity. But it's in those areas that we can begin to focus, right? I mean, think about somebody like Conor McGregor, right? This guy is a prime example of a, of an individual whose reputation both made him and broke him, right? When you look at Conor McGregor, he wasn't, I mean, his nickname was the notorious Conor McGregor, right? He was notorious for shit talking, for getting in people's minds, for psychologically defeating them before he even showed up into the ring, right? Before he even walked in and got on the mat with his opponent, he had psychologically messed them so bad that he was, he had basically already won and that capacity when he started to lose that, right? When started to get knocked out and, you know, he took that fight with Floyd and he didn't beat Floyd and, you know, and then he started to take on other matches and, and you know, and, and started to lose and started to shit talk in, like, really negative, unhealthy ways. Suddenly he started to get a reputation of just being like a bully, you know, not being somebody that had a reputation for really good jovial smack talk and being able to get into people's heads psychologically. But, but then his reputation turned right and it turned for the negative. And that's impacting his career, it's impacting his fighting skills, it's impacting his capacity to psychologically confront the men that he's going to go to battle with. And so his reputation was imperative. It was a huge part of his success and his victories in his career. And for many men, what they don't want to acknowledge, what they don't want to realize is that their reputation in their marriage is what's making it or breaking it. Their reputation in their career, in their business is what's making it or breaking it. You know, if you have a reputation in your marriage, for example, of being lazy, of not following through on what you say you're going to do, your partner, your wife is going to feel that, your girlfriend's going to feel that, and she's going to call you on your shit all the time, and it's going to frustrate her and she's not going to be able to trust you. And slowly, over time, that's going to erode her perspective of who you are, whether or not you can be trusted, whether or not you're safe, whether or not you're a viable partner. And you'll know it, right? Friends won't be able to rely on you, et cetera. I mean, you just go down the list. So it is absolutely imperative for you to begin to have an honest and sort of ruthless perspective of what your reputation actually is as a man, as a husband, as a father, as a business leader. And to ask the question of the people around you, of what is my reputation and are there parts of my reputation that I need to clean up? And to start there, right, to take one aspect of your reputation that is diminishing your capacity to be seen as a leader, to be seen as someone who is responsible or reliable or trustworthy, and to choose an area that you fundamentally give a shit about that you know will better you as a man, that will cause you to have more discipline, that will challenge you and confront you, to grow in some fundamental way and to take on that task as something that is meaningful, because it will require you to confront aspects of your psychological, emotional, spiritual, physical nature that you probably otherwise.

Don'T want to confront that you don't want to come into contact with. So ask the people in your life if you dare, if you're brave enough, if you're courageous enough, if you want a challenge, ask people in your life what reputation do I have? What am I known for? Both good, like what's the good, the bad and the ugly of what I'm known for and write it down and choose some aspect of it that you want to work towards repairing. Because repairing your reputation in many ways is repairing who you are as a man. If you can repair your reputation as a husband, I almost guarantee you you will be in the process of repairing your relationship and mending the relationship that may have been damaged in some capacity because you had a reputation for not following through or for being unfaithful or whatever the case may be. So share this video with somebody that you know will enjoy it. Thanks for tuning in. Comment below and don't forget to send me your questions if you have something you would like me to tackle for next week. Until next week, this is Connor Beaton signing off.