Dating Coach Anwar Tiktok Live (May 14)

It.

Hello. Hello. Hello, everyone.

I hope you're doing well.

Good morning.

Good morning. Good morning.

Good morning.

Excuse me.

Happy Sunday. Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there. Who's a mama?

Oops.

Who is a mama? Who's serving these kids, literally and figuratively.

For those of you that don't know me, my name is Anwar White. I am a dating coach for smart and successful women of color. And I come on here every Sunday and I answer your questions about love and dating and relationships and men or women. We're super inclusive here. So please, if you have any questions, please put them in the comments.

And for those of you that are interested in learning more about what I do, you can definitely click the link in my bio.

And.

You know, there's an opportunity for you to sign up for my international tours. There's a link to sign up for my Sunday newsletter that just came out this morning. There's a link to book a consultation call if you're interested in working with me. There's a link for my podcast that happens all the time, which is so awesome and so great. The last episode that I have on the podcast is all about how to manifest a partner. Yeah. So definitely check that episode out, as well as so many other episodes that I have going on. Alrighty.

Yeah. So for those of you that are interested and for those of you that are moms, please understand that the how we do one thing is how we do everything. So please understand, especially if you're a single mom, that the way that you're dating is probably the way in which you are engaging in your relationships. And so it's going to be important for you to learn how to do this potentially a different way. Okay. And, you know, one of the things that I love so much about my program is that it has the opportunity and the ability to affect a variety of different areas of your life, not just your romantic life. Okay? Awesome. Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome.

I am just.

It's been. I've gone pretty viral recently, so I've had a lot of consultations and a lot of new clients. So I'm just wrapping up a few new clients that just signed up for my VIP program, which is amazing, by the way. And I also just got word from my client in Denver. So all of the ladies that wanted to comment on my post about the worst dating these and said, denver's horrible.

Please understand that it's not that horrible.

Honey, if the girls are getting their.

Guys black men at that too. So it can happen for you. Doesn't matter if you're 50, doesn't matter if you're plus size, doesn't matter if you're dark skinned. This work can happen for you, honey.

Literally. It happens for all of my clients. So if you're interested in doing this work in a significant way, please, please, please, please, please don't act a fool.

Book that consultation call and start working with me. I have two, I have two programs. I got a VIP program that's a little bit more expensive but very intense and one on one time with me. And then I also have a membership that is self paced and a little bit lower in budget for those of us that are can't invest as much as we would like to in this area of our lives, but still want to do a little something something.

So, girl, we serving all the girls here. Okay. All right, I'm going to take you to my room, honey.

I think my partner's gonna give me something for Mother's Day, even though I'm not a mother.

He went grocery shopping as he does on Sundays, and.

So we're gonna do that. We're gonna chill out, we're gonna relax. I've been going really hard in the mornings. I had four consultations in the morning. I have two consultations in an hour, and I have another two tonight, and I have another six on on Monday, another six on Tuesday, another four on Wednesday. So the girls are needing help and I'm happy to be here to support them. Okay, so let's get into this. Girl, don't act shy. I'm only going to be on here for an hour. So if you do have questions, put them in the comments. If you like what I'm saying or you love me because I love you back, tap on the screen. Double tap, triple tap. Give me.

All of the life, honey. Okay, okay. Let me see what the girls are talking about. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Shanna. Cindy said thank you for having four kids. Girl, that's a lot of kids. I'm trying to get my four, too, but my partner won't let me. Girl, there's a difference between having three kids and four kids. The four kids is like lifestyle change. You probably gotta need. You need a new house, you probably need new cars. Girl, that's a lot, girl. And I, I applaud you, Madame Miyagi. Happy Mother's Day, Deanna. Good morning to you, Miss Lisa. Hey, girl. April, good morning from Mississippi. You know, my people are in Mississippi. They're in the Memphis and South Haven, Olive Branch area up north. Shannon said not A mama, but a teacher. I commend all the mothers out there 100%. Cassandra said, yeah, I've been lurking for a while. Girl, are you stalking, girl? What's the tea? Tamiko said, I'm usually laid back and I find men do things to get me upset to see if I care. Is that normal? No. But I think what we have to. They shouldn't be doing that. But what I do think is going to be important for you is to figure out why you're so laid back. And I want to offer to you that perhaps you shouldn't be laid back. And sometimes women who are laid back, it's because they believe that they can just go with the flow because their needs and wants never mattered. So they've just gotten accustomed to kind of riding the wave and going with the flow. Your work, girl, and I'm coming from a place of love and respect, is to actually give an F. To actually talk about what you want and what you don't want and actually put a, you know, put a stance on things. He's got to know that you're human. He's got to know your feelings. I tell my clients all the time, whether it's a potential client on a consultation or not. If you're not able to be emotionally available and emotionally vulnerable, you will never deeply connect with a man. Part of this is he's trying to deeply connect with you, and there are other ways to do that. He shouldn't try to purposely get you upset, though.

Empress said, I've been successfully dating. Your advice is confirming. Thank you for sharing truth. You're so welcome. Empress D said, hi, how are you doing? I'm good, girl. How are you? What's the tea?

What is the absolute tea, honey? Naomi said, I'm online dating. Can you tell me how quickly I should respond to messages? However you would normally respond to messages, you don't need to play games here. So if you. A girl like me who has to have 0 on her email inbox and on her messages, girl, do your immediate tea. But if you are someone who's like, I can, you know, I'm not really someone who's gonna reach back in real quick, do that too. Please realize, though, that you shouldn't be on these apps all day, every day. Do you know, five, ten minutes in the morning, five, ten minutes in the evening? Dating is a mar. Online dating is a marathon. It's not a sprint. So you don't want to go hard on that. Okay.

Cassandra said, lol. You're so funny, girl. I try my best. I'm just being me. Yo. Willie said, Beautiful rising beautiful. People love that.

Poison Ivy said. Hi, Anwar. Am I late to the show? Well, I don't know if it's a show, girl. It's just me just talking my tea. But I just got on. So happy that you're here. T. Moore said, Tips for dating in Toronto.

Obviously, you know you're going to have to open everything up. Honey, you got to date all men. Most of my clients in Toronto end up being with white men.

I don't know what it is. I'm not going to come for a certain kind of men in Toronto, but I'm just saying most of the most of my clients that I've worked with in Toronto have gotten with white men.

Cali Boyce says tips for a professional black gay man. Girl, if I can call you girl, Depends. Where are you located? Give me your location and then I'll give you the tea on how how you're going to date to get your love. Honey. Cassie, good morning. Ola Toya said you went viral this week on ig. I love that for you. I wish they would have tagged you. I know so many people don't tag me. It's totally fine though. It feels like every month I'm going viral for something, which is crazy because as someone who is black and gay, sometimes that can be really triggering because so often, historically, being put out, in out and being seen has always meant violence. So that is something that I worked through a lot in therapy last year so that this moment would come and I could, you know, sit on my throne as the king queen that I am.

Yes, honey, I've been getting some angry messages in my DMs from some of these men. Honey. Who cannot deal. Emily said, how do I maintain a boy roster without feeling bad about it? By not having a boy roster, but having a man roster.

You don't need to be feeling bad about it. Men and the patriarchy want you to feel bad about it. Because when you choose, instead of waiting to be chosen, you are in an empowered state and they are in a disempowered state. So please realize that men have been doing this for centuries and you get to do it too. Especially in 2023. Yeah. User331 said, Good morning. Do you offer guidance for queer women asking for a bestie? Girl, why are we asking for a bestie? We know you're asking for yourself. Girl.

Don't act out. I sure do. I. I want to say, but like, roughly only 5% of my women are the ladies that I work with are queer or lesbian or bisexual. Pan Poly girl. I'm catching up like everybody else is. So yeah, girl, if you want to work with me, please do. I will tell you though, that.

It'S funny. They I think people think that it's like significantly different. It's not. It's all energy, masculine, feminine energy and how you show up in relationships. And to be honest with you, it's actually no shade, but there are a lot more women that are ready to settle down than not. So.

Poison. I say happy Mother's Day to everybody. Yes, another happy Mother's Day to everyone as well. Diana said, love you from Houston. What's your experience with the dating pool here? Girl, it's horrible. I just did a video about how it's the second worst place to date outside of Atlanta. I know that when a client is working with me and she's in Houston. Although I've just gotten a client in an amazing relationship. She's a lawyer and this man is doing so much for her to the point where I'm getting uncomfortable. Like amazing flowers taking you soup and cooking you, you know meals and crackers and things like that when you sick. You know, some of these men are really showing up for my clients and I am fully gagged.

Girl.

This one client, this one client was, I was just talking to her yesterday or and she was talking about how her man basically had did some reservations for like a glamping trip because she had never really done that before and like how like he's already they're gonna go on a cruise at the end of June, girl. Like, these men are really showing up and it's based on the way that I'm teaching them how to date and the way that I am helping them vet these men so that they're only going out with the top, top, top men. So if you want to do that, definitely book a consultation call. This morning, one of my clients in Denver got her guy.

Very nice looking man.

Black man. Black man. Because I know some women in the comments were like in my viral video about worst cities. Like Denver's horrible. Doesn't have to be. Doesn't have to be. Good morning, my truly beautiful. Yo, Willie. Thank you so much for the hand heart scroll. Aaron. Ashley said, guys from dating apps who only want to text all day, let them do it. But if they're not asking you out within a week's time, you got to let them go get smaller. Said, I'm from Memphis trying to relocate because I Hate the dating here, girl. So you got to make sure that your radius is plus or minus 50 miles to 100 miles because it's. The dating in Memphis is not going to be in the city. No shade. And you already know what I mean. It's going to be in the outer suburbs, girl. Giving Germantown tea. Giving South Haven tea. Okay, so you can move if you want to, but I helped my sister get into a marriage, and she's married to an amazing man who works for the utility company. And super stable, super great. Shows up, so it's possible.

Yo, Willie, thank you so much for the heart me.

I appreciate it.

Ashmu said, single mom here having a tough time dating. What's going on, girl?

Emily says opinion on double texting. Don't do it. Don't do it. Say what you got to say once and then wait for him to respond. It has to be a give and take. Don't do too much.

Cassie. PK girl, thank you so much for the heart me. I appreciate it. Poison Ivy said, is it a good idea to meet guys at the gym? I also do jiu jitsu. Yes, girl. Yes, definitely. Please do. Please do. Love that.

Understand, though, in the gym, it's not a one and done. I think some people have the expectations as, oh, we're gonna talk, and then he's gonna get my number immediately. No, the gym tea is like, it's gonna take you two, three, four times of seeing each other and having conversations before he's gonna ask for your number. That's okay. It just means that you're gonna have to go to the gym. Same time, same place, same day consistently. Leslie said, should I give the super shy nerd guy a chance? He reaches out daily but doesn't initiate hanging out.

Yeah, but. So how long has this been? Girl, if it's been more than a week, just let them know, hey, are you. Are we. Am I gonna get a good for the rest of my life, or are you going to take me out? Do that to let him know that you're open to it. He's mostly just, like, really scared of rejection, which most men are. So. And then he can say yes or no. And if he's. If he's, you know, dilly dallying, girl, let it go.

Tia said, I love you, Anwar. I've been trying to schedule a consultation, but the time slots will not save. That's weird, girl. Well, email me@Anwar getyourguycoaching.com and we'll figure it out. I'm literally about to talk to somebody in Dubai because the scheduling's not working for her either at some point later on today. So that happens quite a bit.

Lei says how to date as a woman entrepreneur. The same way that you would date as a non entrepreneur. Right. What do you think is a different experience being an entrepreneur than not?

User 598 Morning. Is it okay normal to want to be or stay single? Girl? Yes, girl, do what makes you feel good. I just, I want to understand what's the context of it. Some people resign to that because they are. They think nobody's out there for them or that they're not lovable. Now if it's coming from that sort of energy, then I'm going to have to shake it up. But if you're like, yeah, I'm good, then girl, be good.

One Sarah said, any tips for dating other women? Same tips that I'm having now with straight women. Like we gotta connect by vulnerability. We gotta consistently set boundaries for things that don't roll with us. We gotta still do some of that healing of the inner child wounds. Right. We got to get clear on what we're looking for, what we want. Kristen said, happy Mother's Day, amore. Happy Mother's Day to you, Kristen. Kai said, any advice for ladies in their twenties trying to date high value men? Well, first of all, get the notion of a high value man out of your head. All men are created equal. Everyone is equal within love. There's no one that's high value or low value.

Yeah.

And the quicker that you can actually accept that and accept people for who they are and how they show up, the better for you. Right. Now, do I want somebody that's going to show up crazy and like acting a fool? No. But if they're going to do that, we have to accept that they're acting a fool and that they're crazy. And that means that we're going to step away from that because we're going to be touching base with how we feel, not what it looks like on the exterior. That's the advice I would give for you ladies that are in their 20s. Cassie said, how do I get a man who has issues displaying emotion to honor my emotions? You don't. You share your feelings. And if he can't show up for you, then you have to go. We can't make men be different than who they are. That's his own emotional journey that he's gonna have to go on and the work that he's gonna have to do. You're not his therapist to work that out for him. Yeah. So if he can't do it, we're gonna have to step away. I know it's probably not what you want to hear, but it's probably what you need to hear. What we're not going to do is be in these shitty relationships and marriages thinking that, oh, it's better that I have a man, even if he's not fully serving me, than to have nothing at all. No, it's better to not have anything at all. The longer that you stay in a relationship where you are with a partner that doesn't actually honor your emotions, the easier and the quicker it's going to be for you to just normalize that and think that it's part of love and it's not. What I want to offer to you and so many other people is that so many of us have been in relationships like that and we think it's, like, somewhat normal and that we think that we can change it because that's how our parents were. Especially if you're this.

They don't need to do that. It's not normal. It's toxic.

Faith said, it can be hard to know who to be vulnerable with. Be vulnerable with everyone. And whoever cannot hold your vulnerability and hold space for that, they're out. Please understand that you can be vulnerable with anybody and it's a superpower. But if you've got to have the boundaries to back it up and to keep yourself safe. So this is more of a boundary issue than it is a vulnerability issue. Tell Said, I've been told I'm complaining. What I'm really doing is telling him my wants and needs, then go, step away. I mean, you're not a client of mine, so I don't know what the language that you're using, but part of it can be your language, but the other part is he probably doesn't have the ability to hold that space for you and to really satisfy your needs.

Crystal said, I've dated men that say I'm wonderful, amazing, but don't want to commit. There's probably not an emotional connection happening. Then they're probably admiring you, but they don't relate to you. Naomi said, appreciate the advice. Thanks so much. You're so welcome.

Kay said, how can I open my mind to date other races? I want a strong black family so bad. I'm not here to make you date outside of your race. I'm here to share with you the statistics. Right, and the statistics are that it's going to be so significantly harder for you to find a black man that is going to be a partner for you than when you date and find just the best person that's going to treat you the best. Right? 13% of the male population in the US is black. So if you're just focused on black men, you're already eliminating almost 90% of the people out there. So difficult. Not to mention that black men.

Do not graduate college, do not get grad degrees.

Single black men are making less than single black women.

And they're settling down much older. Average age 33 versus 30 of other races.

So please understand that if you want that, you get to have it because it's your love life, girl, you're making it significantly harder for yourself. Do you want love or do you want. Do you want it to look a certain way? There's a difference.

Now for those that are interested in working with me, please, please, please, please, please book a consultation call. I'm pretty backed up. I think the earliest one will be on Thursday, but I might have availability if you email me on.

Monday and Tuesday, midday or in the morning.

Mel said, omg, your smile is beautiful. Thank you girl. I appreciate it. Alexandria said, what about dating in Sacramento? I've had no luck. What should I do?

You're gonna have to.

Half the time put yourself in Sacramento. Half the time put yourself in the bay.

Yeah, Sacramento is really small.

Callie said, Dating Tips for Single Black Women attorney in Atlanta I've actually worked with a couple of black women attorneys in Atlanta.

Atlanta is really difficult. It's gonna take a, it's gonna take a while because there are six.

Black women for every black man that's doing something for himself. So please understand that you just have to manage your expectations and know like every time I have a client that's from Atlanta, I know it's going to take a year. Most of my clients get their guy from months three through six. That's why I have a six month program, my VIP program, it's going to take 12 months. Even in my program, which is very effective and efficient. Why.

They don't have to settle. They got six women chasing them at all times. So they're not.

You may want to think about putting your app in other places like a Birmingham, like a Chattanooga. Just switch it up a little bit every now and then in a Charleston. Right?

Because Atlanta's not hidden.

Just. Jo said, hi, I'm in Hampton Roads area where there's nothing but military men here. Yeah girl. Military men are scary, girl. What do I say? Don't get with a military man. Don't get with a policeman, don't get with a fireman, don't get with a surgeon, don't get with a pilot, girl. These men are dangerous. They have a Many of them have a God complex. When you are in an opportunity in a job where you have someone's life in your hand at all times, it's hard not to have a God complex. So sometimes that translates into the home. I'm not saying every man with that career or profession is like that, but most of them are no shade yeah Dea chab Shab thank you for the finger heart girl Carly Said, do you have a podcast? How can we listen? Girl My podcast is called the getyourguy Coaching Podcast. It is on anywhere where you listen to podcasts. Apple Stitcher, Spotify, Wherever girl.

So take a listen to that. It's kind of blowing up right now, which is exciting. I wonder. I'm wondering. Usually I'm in the top 100 in relationship podcast, but that's only because I only post a new episode every other week. I'm sure that if I was posting every week, I probably would be in the top 20 or 30.

Marissa said, do you have any clients in Madison, Wisconsin? Not right now, and I haven't had any Wisconsin clients in a while. Or any experience with Midwest clients. Yeah, I have probably 10, 15 Midwest clients right now.

Jenny Said, When a man breaks up with you for needing time for himself, what does that mean? It means he needs time for himself. He says he's not a couple of things. Either he's not feeling fully connected with you or he's not ready for a relationship. Our job is just to honor that and to move on and to find somebody that is. Yeah, I know. It's easier said than done. So please, I don't want you to think I'm being flippant about it, but I do think it's important to just honor and accept. Accept what he's saying. You don't have to figure out the why, just honor the what. The what? Is he not ready? Cassie, thank you so much for the five finger hearts girl. I appreciate that.

Cindy said, single mom, 39 in New York only wanting to date Altime r girl do it. Do it. Have fun. Act a fool.

Act a swirling full girl user 331 said lol called me out. Thank you for answering. You're so welcome anytime.

Narina Said. Where to meet people if you don't drink girl Anywhere except except for a bar or a club girl. You can do sports, you can do hiking clubs, you can do book clubs, you can do charity, you can do a lot of different things. Up to you.

Mmm. Said I don't have lots of available time, so I think dating would be casual. Well then that's what it's going to be, girl. Yeah. If you are really truly ready to date ladies though, I want to tell you something.

You are going to have to carve out significant time for it. Just like you would take carve out time for a significant relationship. Same thing. And if you can't do that, you're not ready to date. Tamia said, baby, hi. Missed you. Missed you too girl. Hope you're doing well. Victoria said, do you have any clients in New Jersey? Yes girl. Probably have about five clients in New Jersey.

Cheyenne said, I want to be a client. I just live in a terrible place girl. What place do you live in? And I'm pretty sure that it's not terrible. I've gotten. Girl, I've gotten a dark skinned woman in Singapore, a man.

Now you already know. Briana said, good morning. Good morning girl. Tall chick said, omg. I was seeing a guy who said if he lived in a perfect world he'd date a Latina. Okay girl, I'm not even going to give any energy to that. Sienna said, what does your program entail? For my VIP program it has five parts to it. We have weekly group calls on Wednesdays where I'm teaching on a certain subject and then we do like interactive activities and work to solidify that learning. So for example, a couple weeks ago I was teaching my clients how to conduct a exclusivity conversation and this six point framework to do it and then I put them in breakout rooms and then they role played that. My program's a lot about doing learning by doing so. Weekly group calls on Wednesday nights they also get access to my online course which has 25 plus hours of content in it with modules on dating strategies. So I teach you how to actually date with a strategy, a module on vulnerability teach you how to be vulnerable because most, most of y' all don't know how to be vulnerable. No shade boundaries, right? How to set boundaries, how, what language to use, how to get comfortable setting boundaries in the moment because if you don't boundary well, you're not going to date well. I have modules on dating mindset. Getting clear on your relationship needs masculine and feminine energy and healing your inner child wounds. And each one of those modules has around two or three different worksheets to get even more clarity around those things.

So that's the second part the third part of my VIP program is that I do one on one weekly calls with my clients so that we're always leveling up when we either going through worksheets, talking about dates that you've gone on or you're about to go on and what your next step is sometimes. Like for example, I had a client on Friday where her mom was acting a fool and so we had to role play some boundaries that she's going to have to set with her mom in the next week.

Yeah. So third part, one on one calls. Fourth part. You get to be directly connected with me through a messaging app.

I don't have my phone on me now.

I think it's on my desk. But I generally respond within a minute or two. And so anytime you're confused, triggered, need help, I'm there to help you every step of the way. So you always know what you're doing in your dating life and you know that you're doing the right thing.

Right.

The thing that's going to get you closer to your actual goal. So that's the fourth part of my program. Then the fifth part is my private Facebook group with over 100 women in there, black and brown women, if you like my TikTok. My Facebook group is double, triple that. Right. I'm always teaching in there. I'm giving tips, tricks, techniques and actual tea, like how to do it. Not just this is what it is.

And then, you know, my ladies are sharing a lot of different wins that they're having every day. There's another, there's tons of wins that my clients are having, whether it's cutting off an ex, whether it's setting a boundary with her mom. Right. It's just really lovely and inspirational to see. I'm also every week sharing another woman that's gotten into the best relationship of her life because that's what happens every week. It's an expectation in my program. I truly believe that I'm one of the best date, one of the best, if not the best dating coach for women of color. So this is why there's so much support in the six month program. I've been doing it for 13 years and the work works, girl. It works.

So that's my program. If you're interested in it, definitely book a consultation call and we'll see if it's a good fit. Last night I was in a consult and a woman was really upset with me because I didn't think it was a good fit. She didn't know who she was. She was fighting me Every step of the way. And then when I told her I wasn't a good fit, she told me that she was really disappointed and that who I am is not who I portray myself to be. And she really wanted to come for me. Right. I've been doing this work for a while so I can read people and I know if they're ready or not or if I want to work with them. So don't book a call if you feel like you're not ready or that you might not be coachable. Right. Because I'm really in the business of helping women that want to be helped.

Yeah.

And I say all of that with love. It's no shade.

Diana said, can you go into the dynamic with single mothers? I understand the masculine aspect, but is there hope? There's tons of hope. And actually, I want you to believe and think that your children are a great filter for serious versus non serious men. Non serious men will not want to be with a single mother. The important thing that you're going to have to do is be very much on your feminine energy and really slow down the pace.

Because a lot of men, for single mothers, they're going to think, oh, she's so desperate. Like, let me just hook up with her and that's it. No, if you slow down the pace, all of those guys will fade away real quick. Real quick.

Okay. So you got to slow down that pace as well. I'm trying to think of any other things. You got to have your babysitter's club. You got to have three to four people that you can always go to like that. Because sometimes you're going to have same day dates. And that's not necessarily a problem because there should be a bit of spontaneity in the courtship. Yeah.

Yeah.

Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it. Okay.

Tolchick said, I'm still hurt about his comments. I'm tired. I think that there are a lot of men that are going to have certain preferences. But here's the thing. 97 of the guys out there are not going to be your guy. And that guy who wants a Latina man, Latina woman, that's not your guy, unfortunately. But also, fortunately, you don't want to. You. You don't want a guy that's like.

Okay, let me see what's going on here. I think.

Nicole Said met someone I like, but he's in a different state. Do you see success in dating long distance? Sure do. One of my clients lives in Texas. Her guys in Wisconsin. They're about to get in an exclusive relationship. It's working out quite well for them. Aishwarya said, what do you think of the Sprinkle Sprinkle lady? I think she's great. I'm glad that she is here and empowering the ladies. I think the only place where we kind of diverge is when she starts getting into using men for money. I think that that sort of energy is.

Part of the energy that makes a lot of men not trust women, but also the good guys. The good guys are often very giving, but when they get used like that, it turns them bad. And so you start to get more and more guys that want to just use women back. So I don't know if it's helpful for the dating scene in totality.

Alicia said, hi amore. How do I get over my ex when we're still friends and care a lot about each other? You shouldn't be friends with your ex. That's a boundary violation. You should, you should separate. You need space from your ex or you will never get over him.

TFA said, I went on my first date online. At the end of the day, he tried to kiss me twice. Should I drop him? Not necessarily. You just need to set a boundary and let him know I'm not comfortable with kisses on the first date.

Yeah.

Shandra said, is love language filter question too harsh if they say, if they don't say acts of service, I move on, girl. Everybody has their own love language which is based on their lived experience.

I don't think that, that, that should be a filter, girl.

I'm scared about my love language.

Kristen Said, don't forget to hit the screen and like, yes, tap, tap, tap, tap in.

Sandra said, you said Thursday. That's not backed up. That's booked and busy. I sure am, honey. I think I booked, I don't know.

10, 15 clients over the last three days. I've had a shit ton of consultations. It's good though. I'm excited. That's why I'm opening up my VIP program right now for a June cohort, because so many people have joined the program in the last four days. So if you're interested in joining, I know that there's some women that are like, I talked to them a few months ago and they're like, I'm not ready right now. You want to hop on it now?

Catch said, what is your opinion on dating someone that lives in a different country? As a girl who lived in California that's now living in Canada, I'm all for it. But you Got to learn how to do it girl. Right. He's got to be coming to you in the first four to six weeks. If he's not trying to do that, he's not serious.

Caddy said House dating in Miami and Hollywood, Florida. I put it as the fourth worst place to date and in Phoenix as the fifth worst place place to date.

User904 said My boyfriend of 4 years can't keep his eyes off his ex. When I mention it, he gets mad. Girl, he's not the one. He's not the one. And you know why I say that? Because a guy that wants to be with you would have already married you within two years.

You gotta let him go. And if he already has eyes on his ex, you're not the one. He's not the one and you're not the one. And I say this with love, I just don't want you wasting any more time. India said, have you ever worked with clients in PNW like Portland, Oregon? Yes, Portland and Seattle and they've all gotten their guys. Portland is a little bit harder than Seattle because it doesn't have that tech mix. Most of my girls in Seattle get their, get their their engineers.

Miss you said a dating coach basically said women shouldn't withhold intimacy. Should be soon if it feels right. I don't think so.

Was the dating coach a woman or a man?

Ms. Said, what about probation officers? Same. Same Tea.

Love365 said truth didn't know about the surgeons. Yes Girl.

Poison Said I'm not gonna lie, some police officers and firefighters are hot. Guess what girl. Guess what girl. The shade and the tea of it is that a lot of toxic and narcissistic people are going to be the hottest ones. That's God's joke girl. Hahaha. Not funny.

Yeah.

Nani Said, do you have any tips for a girl dating in Miami? I was born and raised here in no luck. You're going to have to. You're going to have to spread out the dating a little bit. Florida and Texas are the worst states to date in, especially as a woman of color. A black woman at that. So I'm going to say one week put your stuff in Miami. Another week put your put put your online profiles in a different city. Yeah. Make sure that that radius is pretty far and wide out there so that you're getting not just Miami but Fort Lauderdale and Hollywood as well.

Erica Said, Wait, what is the name again? The get your guy coaching podcast.

Ari says, I live in Orange county and I find it really hard to date as a black woman. For Southern California girls, you're going to have to put your radius really wide. Almost 100 to 200 miles radius this.

Honey.

The iPad said 10.

10% lap girl.

Thank you so much for the 16,000 likes, y'. All. I appreciate it. And if you're interested in working with me, book a consultation call.

Yeah, okay, I gotta hold it because it's all.

Trying to get through these. Oh my God, so many messages. But I love it. Bria said, do you have any clients in South Korea?

I had a.

A client in South Korea last year. How many of your clients got married? From your advice, I have marriages probably four times a year. For last year I had, I think I want to say around six.

So anywhere from four to six weddings or marriages. And then I have last year I had around six engagements and then I had four move ins and like 40 to 50 actual relationships created. But I only take on, you know, 50 to 60 relationships.

Or clients in a year.

Pretty brown. Thank you so much for the heart me.

Hold on.

Are you okay?

Sorry, girl.

Happy Mother's Day.

I thought my kid fell down the steps. It was just the, it was just the clothes hamper. Laura. Sometimes you gotta girl, boom, boom, boom. Okay, I'm back though.

Okay. I had to calm myself.

Morg said, can I ask a simple question? Yes, you can.

Noah said I was dating an African American passport bro as an African woman and I'm here to say I regret it. Yeah, girl, they're the lowest of the low. No shade, all shade.

Soon to be nerves. Where should we go to find different races of men? Everywhere, girl. They're everywhere. They're just not going to approach you. So you gotta, you gotta actually start conversations with them.

Soon to be nurse said. I'm hiring him. I need a new mindset, girl. Do it. Book a consultation call and we'll. I'm gonna help you get your guy. That's what I do. And I love doing.

Everything. Okay. Yes. I was freaking out. Just slide two steps. Okay. Okay, got it.

Demi the key said you're an amazing coach that actually practices. Thank you. I appreciate that. JB says, do you offer payment plans for your programs or is it up front? I have two options, but most of my clients will do monthly payment plans. I actually stretch it out. So like my VIP program is a six month program, but the, the payments actually stretch out to nine months because it's helped so many of my clients actually do the work. Yeah. So it's very doable. If you are interested in getting your guy. Okay.

BBB said, what if a guy did something you didn't like and you said you no longer want to know him, then block him.

Boundaries.

What is your Facebook group? Get your guy coaching. I have a private one that's for my clients and a public ones for those that want to be my client.

Do you do lesbian relationships? Boy, less personally, no. Professionally, yes.

Just being me. How do I sign up? Because dating in Brooklyn has been hard. Really? Girl, My. My ladies in Brooklyn are killing it. Book a consultation call with me. The link is in my bio. And girl, we'll get this all situated.

Behova's witness said, how do you know when you're ready? Well, first of all, the name is amazing. Secondly, you'll know you're ready when you're talking about.

An ex or past relationship and you're not feeling any sort of emotional tinge to it. Yeah. The other thing that I think is important is that I want you to do a relationship inventory. Friends, family, and for those relationships that are not fully serving you, you're going to have to let them go. Dating is about letting relationships go. And if you're holding on to relationships that don't serve you, you're going to have a tendency or be more apt to get into dating relationships that are not going to serve you.

Okay.

Cara says, is there an age minimum to work with you you work with? I generally work with women between the ages of 30 and 50. The youngest that I work with is probably 25, 26. 6.

Yo Willie said the GYG club seems to be a good fit for me. Not ready to date but want alone. Yeah, definitely. There's definitely. There's a link about the GYG club in the link in my bio, so definitely click on that to learn more.

There's so many comments, so.

When I scroll back up sometimes it skips because you can only scroll up to a certain amount. So if I do miss your question, I am. I apologize if you don't hear your question in five minutes. Put it back in there. Okay. And thank you so much for the 21,000likes. I so appreciate it. User 521 said. Best a dating app for women of color. Depends on the city. Girl, what city are you in?

MOIAC been talking for two months. How many dates has he taken you on? I don't care about the talking. All is great. But he hasn't asked to be official. Should I leave? No, not yet. But if that's happened in three months, you should step away.

Bar Said, yep, all my exes were fine as hell and we're all. Were all emotionally available. True, true. Tea girl.

Claudine Said may have missed this answer, but do you open consultations every two weeks? I was looking for June. No, it's only for like the next three to four days. I open my calendar for.

So if you're interested in having a consultation. I think girl, I think I have like a couple of spots available for Thursday.

Because I'm completely booked for the next three days today and the next three days. So you might want to check back in June. But I'm always of the mindset you want to do this sooner or later because I do first come first serve especially for my VIP program because I can only work with. I try to take on 15 to 20 clients per cohort and I do four cohorts a year but I'm doing a fifth one because I'm super viral right now.

Trinity said, do you have tips on how to reach out first or text first? Cuz child. Child what? Don't text a guy first. Please don't.

Please don't.

Sophia says, how do you get yourself stop focusing on looks? Well the apps are make you focus on looks. You have to get better in touch with your emotional side so that you can be giving yourself the time to emotionally connect with these mena. How do I make him understand that I am not trying to take advantage of him by not agreeing to 50 50. You don't need to convince a man or make him understand anything. You share your thoughts and your feelings and if he's not into it, you step away.

Living loving life. Just saw your post about how hard it is in Houston. Should I move? Not necessarily. I just think that you need to understand it's going to take longer than it would for other cities.

Jazz said just booked a consultation. Awesome girl. I look forward to it. Let's help you get your guy girl. Cuz we are getting men left and right up in here and you. Here's the thing ladies. You wanna. If you wanna get into my program, you wanna do it now because the spring and the summer are hot. Hot. There are some ladies that like start working with me in November, girl. It's cold girl. Not much is happening in November, December and January. No shade. This is the time to do it actually.

Yo yo Said, have you worked with women in the uk? Tons of them. Tons of them.

Yeah.

Did you adopt your kids? No, I had them via surrogacy. So they're all biologically. Two of them are biologically connected to me and one of them is biologically connected to my my partner. That's what I'm telling you all. I literally have manifested and done things that have been unimaginable because I believed it to be true. And I truly believe that each and every one of you can find your person. You have to believe in love to find and fall in love. Okay.

Be said, you dropped everything, period. I sure did. Girl. Was quick with it. Girl. It's that instinct, girl. There's that instinct. Unique said, I recently became a certified matchmaker. Good for you, girl.

Shannon Said, I also also this guy on Tinder from Germany is interested in me, but I've never even been out of the US Girl, I lived in Germany for.

A year and a half. The Germans love us. Girl. I was, I was proposed to three times there. They love us.

Soon to be Nurse Said, wait, why don't they approach us, they being non black men because they think that black women are only looking at black men. So instead of getting rejected by a black woman, they just don't engage. Lala Speak said, do you coach Black poly women? I haven't really in the past, but apparently I'm going to have to start to because it's a trend that's becoming more and more prevalent. But I want to offer something and that is that in these cities with the gender ratios off Atlanta, D.C. houston.

More and more people are getting into Bali relationships because they're settling because there are more available women than there are men. And when there are poly relationship, it generally means.

Like multiple women. One man.

Aluchi, thank you so much.

For the Four Roses girl.

Cat Bro said, how do you feel about biracial women in the dating scene? The same way I feel about black women, brown women, white women, girls. A woman is a woman, is a woman is a woman.

Kira said, and where's a comedian, y'? All? I don't know if I have a comedian. I'm just me girl. I'm just me.

Honeybee. Thank you so much for the hearts.

Girl.

Supreme Thunda Said, I'm dating an agent guy and was upfront that I was interested. You have to do that. These men are truly checking for you, but you have to let them know.

Hey boy, hey white boy, hey Asian boy, hey Hispanic boy. Hey Indian boy. I'm checking for you too.

You gotta let them know that.

Let me see what's going on.

Caddy Chat said, do you work with women 57 and older? Yeah, I just actually helped a woman in Chattanooga get her guidance. She's 505758.

And my 50 year olds are actually easier to get into amazing relationships than my other aged clients.

Anna Reli Said hi. Do you coach women for those that are interested in learning how to date but aren't ready for relationships? I do. But the hope and the the expectation is that as we continue to do the work you will become more and more ready for a relationship. You might not feel like you're in a ready for a relationship now, but as you become more healed and more confident you might one might change one's opinion. Yeah.

Poison Ivy said, should a 25 year old increase age limit from my current age limit is 25 to 29. Yeah I would just increase it to 32.

CD thank you so much for the heart me.

You're Will Said. Thank you for reading my comment. I try. I go through all of them and if I've answered the question already in this live I I don't answer it. But for those new questions I I I do want to answer them. A Said, when should you start dating again? Post breakup? Again? When you are healed? When it doesn't actually you don't get emotional about it.

Estad Said, Should I look at time and dating as the number of dates or number of weeks? You kind of have to look at both and it really is going to be dependent on the nature of the courtship. Yeah. So for example.

Most of the time I look at number of dates which normally coincides with weeks or months. But sometimes like one of my clients had this crazy weekend where she had like five dates in three days.

You can't look at weeks and months when it comes to that.

Moon river said, how should we deal with being with being? I think with people being intimidated by success, academic background, not being with them.

Troy said, from your experiences with clients, are there arching themes as to why it's changing to date in 2023? Totally.

Women are more masculine, men are more feminine these days. Women are making more money. Men are making less money than women these days. So the power dynamic has completely shifted in dating. Also with apps there's just more choice. So there's a paradox of choice. Also based on how we were all raised. There are more narcissists and trauma out there, so you have to navigate that as well. I think those are the major issues that are happening.

D. Brown said, during the courting phase, does a woman reach out via text or call? No, she does not. Because that would not be being courted. Yeah, that's talking phase. There are some women that talk. There are other Women that are being courted, you get to decide which one you want to be. In my program, I coach them to be courted.

Quiet please. That we have a wonderful family friend here in Dallas ready to find his wife. Can you coach him? I only coach women of color. I don't quote, I don't coach men.

Be classy as a woman. What's the hardest profession to match?

Are you talking about.

Like a man? I will say this.

Doctors probably the hardest. The hardest both for men and women.

Anna Riley said okay, I already answered that one.

Ray said, should I spend the block on my ex? Nope, nope nope. You should not. Never go back to your ex.

Your future partner will never be an ex. Trust that cd. Thank you so much for the hand Hearts.

Get smaller generally. How much is coaching? So I have one program that's in the lower four figures and then I have another program that's in the mid four figures.

Again with monthly payment plans. Sophisticated lady said, what are your thoughts on men wanting to split the bill? 50 50? I don't have any thoughts for those men. Those are not your men.

Tay said, X wants to send money but I've moved on. Don't accept any money. Do not be in communication with your ex.

I fit gets rough Said you're so sensible and sensitive it's mind blowing. I try my best honey. I try my best. Car said, I'm sipping on my wine getting emotional because Amar is so amazing and glad I found him. The power of social media yes girl, I'm so happy.

Jody said, I'm separated for over a year now. Do you think I should wait until after divorce to start dating?

Depends on when that divorce is going to be. Yeah I I recommend my clients never to get with a separated man.

Because you gotta, you gotta, you gotta close a chapter on one thing to start it a new for another.

Unless you're about to. The divorce is going to be finalized next month. Wait till it's finalized girl.

Julia, thank you so much for the heart me.

Remy said, Love your lifetime or thank you girl.

Let me see what's going on here.

One question. What's your favorite color? Turquoise.

Poison Ivy Said why do guys on Reddit say they'd like for a girl to ask them out sometimes? Because guys on Reddit are introverted, nerdy.

Many insecure guys who do not have the confidence to ask a woman out.

Majority of them are so it makes it easier for them. Like I was saying before, many men are more in their feminine energy these days. That's why many of them have been coddled by their mothers so they don't have to do as much as men used to do in the past. That's why. Doula, thank you so much for the rose, girl.

Doula, thank you so much for the m.

For all the ladies that are saying they're close to giving up on dating. Don't, girl. This is the hot season, girl. Give up on dating in the winter time, girl. Not now.

Poison Ivy said, Is it true what they say about machismo in Latin American culture? What do they say exactly, girl?

Yolanda said, GYG member and I'm 55. Anwar is amazing. Thank you yo Appreciate it. And girl, you are leveling up and I'm so happy and proud of the work that you're doing.

Too fresh.

Flying Money said, I'm too fresh out of a relationship, but I plan to join next year. Good 90s beauty set. Yours. You're always spot on. Thank you.

Sin said, what age range should I date at? 38. I'd say 30 plus 10 years, minus five years. So 33 to 48.

Maui said, how important are looks when dating and weight? I think they're important, but they're not everything. Yeah. So I always say, like, if you see a guy and he's on a scale from 0 to 10, you rate him a 5 or higher. Continue to engage with him.

Java said, do you support international dating? I sure do, girl. If I didn't, I wouldn't be married right now. I always knew that I would never marry an American man. Never. And for many of you women of color, black women specifically, that's probably your your destiny as well. If you open yourself up to.

And said going on a first date after my son. Any tips? Have fun. Don't think about your son. No shade.

Yeah, let let this man do for.

Thank you so much for the 31. Almost 32,000 likes, y'.

All.

I appreciate it. I think it's rough. Said 13. Black male. What percentage are Asian? I think roughly 5% are Asian.

Oh my God, y'. All. Can you tell me what time it is?

Because I don't. Sometimes when I go out of here, it disconnects. So let me know what the time is because I have consultations at 12 and I feel like I've been munching away.