Dating Q and A 02-06-24

Oh, my God. I'm already on.

Hello, hello, hello. Let's get this party started. Let's get this party started.

Hello, hello, hello, everyone. Hello, hello, hello. Good to see you all. Happy to see you all.

Yay. I'm on. I'm here. Queer. Ready to rock and roll.

Hello, hello, hello. For those of you that are just coming in.

For those of you that don't know me, my name is Anwar. Y people call me Coach Anwar. I am a dating coach for women of color, black and brown women who are ready to heal, who are ready to date with strategy, who are. Who's ready to get into the best relationship of their lives. It's actually really interesting. Was it yesterday? Yesterday, one of my clients who I worked with a year ago, a year and a half ago, let me know that she's 39 weeks pregnant, girl. And I was gagged. I told. You know what I told her, girl? I said.

Anwar is a very beautiful name for a girl. Don't you think, ladies? That. Why not name your child after me?

Totally joking, girl. I'm not that narcissistic. Anyway, I hope y' all are doing well. I. I come on here because I want to help you level up. I want to answer any questions that you may have about love, dating, relationships, men, women, anything in between. Hunty. Yes. So for those of you that are new, you put your question in the chat, and I will answer it when I get to it.

Be patient, because there may be up to a thousand people in this TikTok, and I have another, you know, probably up to 50 people on IG that will be there. Yeah. All right, let me see what y' all are talking about already, honey. Hello. Hello, hello. Hi, Esther. Hey, Nk. Hey, Joanne. Hey, Reyna. Hey, Laid by Oma. Hey, library. Hey, Augusta. Hi, Brianna. She said hello, my fairy godbrother. Hello. Hey, Tia. Hey, Dulce. Hey, Unicorn. Hey, Latrice. Good to see you, girl. Jordan said hi, and we're so happy to see you at this evening. Happy to be here. Yeah. Oh, my God. So much, so much happening. I had an ESSENCE.

Article come out today, which was really cool.

And also, you know, things have gotten a little bit crazy. You know, me and some of my controversial takes gotten a little bit of hate, a little bit of your evil. So I had to take some things down because I never want to trigger people. I never want people to feel like I am trying to hurt them in any way. So there are some things I had to take down.

Yeah, I guess it's part of just getting bigger and growing. But, yeah, that was a little bit tough. But we're moving on, we're moving forward, and we're going to do this work, honey. Yeah. Augusta said, listen to the podcast. Love it. Thank you. Laid by Oma Said. Where can I watch your podcast? So I have some episodes on my YouTube channel, but also anywhere that you listen to podcast episodes. So like Apple or Spotify, my podcast is there. It's called the getyourguy Coaching Podcast. Also.

If you go to the link in my bio, I have a link for my podcast, I have a link for free trainings, and I have a link if you want to book a call with me, if you want to work with me professionally. No pressure to do that, but if you do, great, I would love to work with you in the consultation call. We'll see if it's a good fit. If so, we'll get you in. If not, I'll give you resources to help you level up your love life. Yeah. If there's anything that I'm saying that resonates with you, definitely tap the screen. Double tap, triple tap. Girl. I want you tapping so much. We're getting carpal tunnel. We're getting. We're getting arthritis, girl. No shade. Yeah.

Hey, Mariana. KH said four months in updating and he hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend yet. Well, girl, if you want, if you want it to happen, girl, you're gonna have to bring it up. But four months and nothing, girl, lets me know he's not ready. Yeah. So if you bring it up, girl, and he says he needs more time, you need to cut him. And that's all T and no shade, girl. Yeah, Jaz. Hey, girl. Ari says, do you think it's okay to date with a guy who has a one year old baby? I think that. I think the first year to two years is very important when it comes to baby development. Now, I don't really care about the one year old baby. I actually am more interested in the actual relationship with the mother. Right. And what that looks like. Yeah. Were they together? How long were they together? Why did they leave all of. Why did they break up all of that stuff? So that's the information that I think that you need to get, girl. Yeah.

Jazz said, I started dating white men in Milwaukee. The gingers love me.

Yes, girl. Catch them all, honey. Like Pokemon, sweetie. Catch all of them, honey. I'm gonna call them Charizard.

Oh, Lord, I feel like I'm starting up, girl. Queen said, how should you approach a man who you let Be. And he just reappeared. I don't understand that, girl. How can you approach someone who is reappearing anyway? Can you clarify? I want to answer for you. Sabat said, amore, we love you. Thank you, girl. I appreciate that. I appreciate that so much. Jordan said, I'm ready to level up. I know that's right, girl. Get it, get it, honey. It's like a video game, honey.

Get it.

Catherine said, how to find non racist white men in Ohio. This is how you do it, girl.

You get out of Ohio.

Alicia, thank you so much for the heart meme. No, I mean, girl, here's the thing, right? When every presidential election, there are four blue dots. Toledo, Columbus and Cleveland. Hit it. Hit it, girl. Triangle of love, honey. Almost said, happy Tuesday. Happy Tuesday, girl. I call this the Tuesday tea, honey. We're going to be spilling a lot of tea, sweetie. Lots of it, honey. You know what I'm saying?

We gonna. Honey, we're gonna gag a little bit, girl. We're gonna just kiki a little bit. Chandler Face said, where are you located? Girl, why you want to know? You want to dox me, girl, why you want to know? I want to know where. Where I'm at, sweetie. Girls want to be in my business.

I'm in Canada, honey, and I. Girl, msb. Don't be telling her my location, girl. Don't be telling my location to people. It's like you telling them my government name, girl, don't do that. If you love me, you won't be telling my business.

You know, actually, today I just got my Canadian passport, so I'm full fledged Canadian, sweetie.

Remember those drinks called Clearly Canadian? When I was a kid, I thought they were, like, expensive. Like expensive shit, girl. So now I'm. I'm clearly Canadian, honey.

Anyway. Hi, Audrey. Hi, Natalia. Hey, Koa. Hey, Lena. Hey, Nikki. Okay, CEO Monroe said, should you date someone who has been trying to talk to you for a long time? Yeah, girl, why not? The gag is, why haven't you wanted to talk to them? That's the question. Laura Love said, yes. I caught another live yes, girl every Tuesday and Sunday. And sometimes I come on Fridays if I'm feeling like it. If I'm feeling frisky and I want to talk my ish, honey.

Hey, life with Casey. Hey, Char. Amazing. Hey, Toya. Baby girl said, what does it mean when someone in a relationship says, let's be cool? I'm confused. Well, it depends on the context, girl.

But it's sounding like he wants to downgrade the relationship potentially. Yeah. Tippy said Anwar. Hello, cutie tippy girl, keep it in your pants. You know I'm gay. Gay, gay, gay, gay, right? You know, I got a partner and kids, honey. And if you try to take me from my family, I won't do it. I won't do it. I won't, I won't. Maybe. I don't know. Girl, what you got going on? I'm kidding. I just said, skin looks so good. Thank you, girl.

Topo said, loves your hoodie. Thank you so much. I got that hoodie from the TikTok shop and I saw and I was like, I have to have it. Chai said, hello, fairy Godbrother. Hello, girl. Good to see you. Good to see you. Let's see what the girls are talking about on ig. Purge says I'm a trans trying to date in Philly. Any advice, suggestions? So here's the advice that I would have for anyone who has and will experience guys that may try to hide them. Now, you know, I'm going to keep it real with you. All right? So sometimes they will try to hide. Curvier women, trans women, darker skinned women. Don't let them hide. You never go to their house. Never go. Do you remember that Sex in the City episode where Carrie. That guy was taking Carrie to like, you know, the. The dark restaurants where they can't be seen. Don't go to the dark restaurants, girl. Don't go. And, you know, sometimes they'll be like, oh, let's go outside of the town to have a date. Don't do that, girl. You're going to have your dates in the center of town. And on the second and third date, you want to. You want to see if there's going to be some pda, hand holding, hugging, kissing. You got to see if he can handle it or not. Yeah. A lot of these guys can't. They want to hide you like a doll in the closet, girl.

You are a doll, girl. But you can't be stuck in the closet, sweetie. Okay.

So that's. That's the advice that I have. Right. Always public and PDA on the second or third date and see how he works that. Yeah.

Okay. Coco said, how do I receive the princess treatment I deserve? Well, here's the thing. I'm not the dating coach to help you get princess treatment because I help women get queen treatment. Yeah. There's a difference. Princess treatment is very much giving someone's daughter. Yeah.

And I want you to be someone's woman. Yeah. If you want to get princess treatment, that's on you, girl. And there's no shade there. But please understand that princess treatment means that there is a king that is telling you what to do at all times, because he's controlling you based on that treatment.

Yeah.

That'S important. Jasmine said, you ain't popping if you ain't got haters. I know that's right, girl. Natalia said, I love the black girl texting podcast episodes. They were great. Thank you, girl.

Mandy said, suggestions for dating in Atlanta. Girl.

One suggestion that I have for dating in Atlanta. It's like a movie, girl. And it's called get out too.

Yeah.

Jay said, can you explain the attractiveness video? Yeah, so I will explain it. Although it's triggered a lot of people, so I just want to honor that. The intention was not to trigger people, but a lot of people come to me and they say, anwar, like, like, how do I, like, rate myself in the actual dating market? Like, I get DMs all the time. Like, and most of the time they don't know, like, their physical. And the way that I think about dating is, like, everyone has, like, a mate value based on their physical. They're intellectual, they're emotional. And for men, it also includes their financial. And so the intention of that video was to say, hey, here is a way in which. Which has scientifically proven about how to determine that. But people were thinking I was patriarchal or trying to tell women that they were ugly. Not my intention at all. My intention was to let you know, if this is what you want to know.

That this is a way in which to. To see that. Yeah.

Circuit five. Does a woman still establishing career hinder her in dating?

Well, I guess the question is, what do you mean by hinder? Because obviously.

It will be attractive to certain guys, and those are the guys that you need to focus on. The majority of guys, if you got something going on, will be intimidated because you probably have more going on than they do. Yeah. So for my doctors, for my lawyers, for my consultants out there, Put that on your profile, girl. Don't downplay it. Don't erase it. Don't do anything. Just make sure that your boundaries are where they need to be so that he's not trying to look for some mama. Right. Because a lot of these guys will.

She is. Father said, those of us who know you understood you. Thank you, girl. Appreciate you. Yeah. You know, I never want to. I never want to offend anyone. That's not. That's not my mo. I'm here to empower black women. I want. I want us to come go into this dating situation with clear eyes. What did they say on Friday Night Lights? Girl, clear eyes, open hearts. Can't lose something like that. Honey, honey, we give in. Friday Night Lights up in here.

You're Montreal bestie. Love that girl. I'm Montreal too. Hi, Amy. I love your content. Thank you, girl. I appreciate it.

Let's see. IOA said, we love you. Thank you, girl. Alasia said, what are we talking about tonight? What we talk about every night, girl D. What are they? Girl, what of it?

They said, hi. Question. Why would one continually attract avoidant men? It's because you're avoidant. Like attracts like, girl. It's like magnets. Science class, fourth grade. Right. What does it mean? Well, first of all, let me just say this. Most of the guys that are single are probably going to be avoidant. Right? And. But here's the thing. If you are not emotionally available.

You will attract guys that are also not emotionally available because they will never have to actually engage in their emotions because you're not even engaging in your emotions. So it's easier for them to be with you. Right. And it's easier for you to be with them because they're not making you or inspiring you to be in your emotions.

Yeah. So that might be a reason why Primetime says, guy I'm starting to talk to said if he could afford it, he would date a 26 year old. I'm 45. Told him. Peace. Yeah, girl. Good, good. Glad you did that. Brandy said, hey, I'm our bestie. Hey, girl, Good to see you. Prime time. Thank you so much for the rose.

Cassie said, do you do rates the other day? You say you need to know what rate is? No, I don't rate women. That's why I was doing that video, so that y' all can rate yourself. It's not my mo. Vic said, love you. Thank you, girl.

Alicia said, how can I work on being more feminine? I literally just had a class with the ladies in my program about masculine and feminine energy tonight, so. Girl, you should have been in that class, girl. Right. But I will just say this. I. Asking for help instead of trying to be Miss independent will be a really great first step. Yeah. And thank you all so much for the 18,000 likes already. I appreciate it.

Josephine said, please tell me how to find a blue collar man. Here's what you do, girl. You go to your kitchen, you go under that sink and you break one of those pipes, girl. So you got a plumber coming in so he can plum some things.

Yeah.

You just talk to people, right? The thing about it is that there are a lot of guys that are blue collar guys. Oftentimes will drive pickup trucks, will be out and about. No shade. But will he literally will be out doing things?

Yes, honey. We want him to plummet all honey. No shade. Yeah. Frenchie said, how to deal with avoidance. The way that you deal with avoidance is by avoiding them.

Yeah. Marie said, you are a vibe. Thank you, girl. I appreciate that. Prime time. Thank you so much for the rose, girl. The two roses. I said I love you, listen every day. Thank you, girl. It's Nakia Said, why do people say men hate you if he asks you to give him money? Because he thinks of you as a bank and not as a human and not as a woman. He doesn't like you if he's asking for money.

Yeah.

Sid said, love your content. We're all in different places of dealing with the realities of dating. As a black woman, 100% totally get that. Yeah.

Rapid Fire said, what do you think about language barriers while dating? It depends on where that language barrier is, girl. Because Sometimes I'm watching 90 Day Fiance and they got to use a translator to talk to each other. That's a no go. That's a no for me, dog. Right. If y' all are. Are understanding or, you know the language levels, girl, they Gotta be a B1, girl, a 2 at the lowest. You got to be able to be conversational. Yeah.

Big P said, what are your thoughts on a girl texting you? So fine, you got me barking. Oh, this is a man talking.

What are my thoughts on that? I think she's shooting her shot, and I think that.

I don't think that she should do that. But.

The question is, what do you think as a man? Tell the women how when a woman is shooting her shot like that, how that makes you feel. Mimi said, after how many dates should we be exclusive? Good question. At least seven or eight. Here's the thing, guys don't really even think about exclusivity until physical dates. Sit six. Yeah.

KT said, I love your vibe. Thank you, girl. KO Said, love agenda. I know that's right. An acquired taste. Hi. Do you have any tips for dating in Baltimore?

So you want to make sure that you're dating in the entire DMV area. Yeah. So you got to expand your radius. First and foremost. That's going to be really important. I have to know you to understand what's happening in your dating life.

And give you more specific tea on Baltimore, but expand it for sure.

Cassandra said, hi, and we're hey, girl.

Alexa said, if you don't like his family, it's only right to end it, right?

Well, it depends. It depends. If you're talking if that guy's Asian or African, it's not going anywhere. Please understand, he's going to choose his family over you 98 of the time. If he is African American or like American in another way and he, he's been very protective over you, then.

It'S his responsibility to make sure that his family is respecting you and civil right. And if he's not doing that already and he hasn't like caught on to the fact that maybe the family is being shady to you because that would be the only reason why you wouldn't like them.

Then he can't protect you and he needs to protect and provide for you. Yeah.

Thank you, Latrice, for this paper crane girl.

Char said, fairy godbrother. Hello. You know, I started saying fairy godbrother because all of these black guys just kept on saying, well, you're gay. You don't know anything. I'm like, dude, I'm a dude who dates dudes. I feel like I know a lot, maybe too much. So I said, you know how like if like the Wyatt's are calling you the N word, you just start using the N word to take power over it? That's what I have to do with the, the fairy comments, honey. So now I'm everybody's fairy godbrother. That's how it goes, honey. That's how it goes.

Marina said, how can I find a walk a white collar man? Girl? Go to the financial district, wherever the tall buildings are, girl. That's where you need to be hanging out.

Yeah.

And some of the girls have side hustles at doordash and Uber and all that, girl. You might find them there too.

Sabbat said, hey, coach Anwar, when should we start paying for dates?

Girl? Far along, girl. They need to be making it happen for at least the first four to five, maybe even six days dates before you even consider anything like that. But that's something that I go through in my actual program. Like we literally go date by date. What you should be doing. Yeah. If you're interested, definitely book a consultation call. The link is in my bio for that. She cc the plugs that I need to book a call. Girl. Go to the link in my bio.

Do it, honey. Do it. Mahogany said, anwar, you are everything. Thank you, girl.

Jeremy, thank you so much for the four roses.

Curve. The J said, how do you deal with a man that's not up on his yet, But a great man. He can't be a great man and not on his. Girl, girl, make it make sense. Girl. You're giving one plus one equals three. Don't do that. He's not on his shit. He's not a great guy for you.

Well, here's what I want to offer to you. Potentially not a great boyfriend, but a good guy. Right? And it's important to make that differentiation.

Avery baby said, hi, amore. I want to start dating, but I'm waiting for sex until marriage. How do I date effectively? Girl, the gag is that. That's. Girl, that's. That's good. Like, the way that you date effectively is, you know, the same way that everybody else needs to date. But just being very clear about that early on in the courtship process so that you're not wasting his time if that's not something that he wants to do. Right. I generally say you want to disclose something like that or if there's herpes simplex for anyone that has it or around day three.

There'S a level of investment there. They can make a, you know, a determination about whether they want to be with you or not knowing that information.

Okay, let me see, girl. Let me scroll up, honey. Y' all are talking a lot of. Honey.

Rain said, there is a big trend of black women and African men. Yes, honey, I think I'm going to do a video about black about African men, But I need. I need a little bit of time. Honey. I can't. I can't go controversial again.

I need breaks between my controversial takes. But, yeah, there is a trend happening because there are more African men out there, and the way culturally, they will court you differently. So it's gonna feel like. It's gonna feel like a fairy tale, right? And so.

But there are, like, pitfalls that you have to, like.

Focus on to make sure that you don't get got. Honey.

See to. So Nola said, do you like the hinge app? Not anymore. During the pandemic, it was. It was. It was. It. Now it is shit.

Miss, girl, some of these names, girl, no shade Miss with Dallas said, do you think a month is too early to sleep with a man? I think that you are in control of your own body, and you get to do whatever the hell that you want to do. Now, if you're asking me as a dating coach, these names, girl, no shade Miss with Dallas said, do you think a month is too early to sleep with a man? I think that you are in control of your own body and you get to do whatever the hell that you want to do. Now, if you're asking me as a dating coach, I think that that will definitely like slow momentum down toward exclusivity.

Because those are girlfriend benefits. So if you're going to do that, there's literally no incentive for him to want to make you his girlfriend. I think sometimes the girls think, oh my gosh, if I put it on him, girl, he's gonna be. He's gonna want me, honey. He's gonna, he's gonna want to commit to me, sweetie. No, girl, he's not at all. And actually, chemically speaking, he's gonna want to separate himself from you. He's not going to feel bonded to you at all.

So that's what I think, girl. Yeah.

Jeremy said, why would a guy ghost then stalk your social media page? He wants to just see what you're up to. He wants to, he wants to still have access to you just in case he gets lonely, bored or horny, that he can reach back out to you and he'll be able to talk to you and know what's going on in your life. Do not put any credence into him stalking your social media, girl. Pay it no mind and block him.

Elijah said I'm in a new relationship. He says I'm always invited over, but I want personal invites. Am I crazy? No. But what I think has happened is we haven't clarified what it looks like to be in an exclusive relationship. So one of the things that I do in my program is I help them navigate with my six point framework how to conduct that exclusivity conversation. So. So things like this are very clear. Yeah. You're going to have to have a conversation with him to create expectations about what, what dates look like on a weekly bas.

Democratic party said we see swiftly deleted that attractiveness rating video. Yeah. A lot of people got triggered by that and that's not my intention. So I, I put it on private for sure. Latrice, thank you so much for the paper crane. Ms. Positive. Thank you so much for the Five Roses gurney. Thank you so much for the Three Roses.

Primavera accessories. Hey, Anwar. Can you touch base with anxious attachment and how to manage plan these things? I don't. That's something that I would really focus on in my program. So I don't, you know, I don't really think about like, I don't really focus on anxious or avoidant. Like that's not really the terminology that I use in my program. Right. I think that we all have Certain triggers based on our inner child wounds. And it's going to be really important for us to understand what those are. Dee Dee said, any advice in dating in a small town? Santa Paula, Ventura County, California. That's literally. I was born in Ventura County.

So you're gonna have to put your radius wide, girl. I mean, I'm talking about the Valley. From the Valley to Santa Barbara. Okay. Because Santa Paula is just too small. You're not going to get much of anything there.

Diana said, hello, friend. I'm such a fan of your advice. Thank you, girl. I appreciate it.

Tia said, hey, fairy godbrother, do you have any tips on talking to someone you like? Yeah. Talk to them like they are your younger cousin. Yeah. The fact that you're asking this question lets me know that you're already putting this guy on a pedestal. Men cannot be put on a pedestal.

They cannot.

Like. Because here's the thing. If you start with him on a pedestal, he will always be on a pedestal and he will always look down on you and you will always look up to him. And that gives daughter daddy energy. And that is not a dynamic that is going to be healthy in a relationship. Okay? Holy. See men with domestic violence record. What do you do when this happens?

I think that you walk away slowly. I don't think that you chance it. Yeah.

You are not somebody's rehabilitation. And so that's the advice that I would give to any family member, any sister, any friend.

He might be rehabilitated, but I don't think that you should be the one to test that out.

Kia Bonita said, why my Latino boss always stare and smile hard and when he shakes my hand, he holds it while eye contact, girl. Cuz he likes you. You know that.

You know it, girl.

Monique says, what do you think of a man? Kia Bonita said, why my Latino boss always stare and smile hard and when he shakes my hand, he holds it well. Eye contact, girl. Cuz he likes you. You know that.

You know it, girl.

Monique says, what do you think of a man that is too quick to be in love? After first few conversations, it's a turn off. That's love bombing. It's love bombing. Yeah. He doesn't know you. To be in love with you.

He has to have a certain that is too quick to be in love. After first few conversations, it's a turn up. That's love bombing. It's love bombing. Yeah. He amount of information about you to be in love. He might be in love with the idea of you. He doesn't know you to be in love with you.

He has to have a certain amount of information about you to be in love. He might be in love with the idea of you, but he's not in love with you. And if he can't make that determination and that differentiation out.

Chocolatey says, does black women plus white finance partner work?

I mean, anything can work. Finance guys are an interesting.

Interesting partners. Yeah, a lot of finance people.

Work really hard, but actually maybe aren't as smart as you think. The thing about a finance partner is that he might not have a lot of time for you and the way that it works when it comes to finance. And if he's a partner, he's going to be out and about trying to get business. And oftentimes that business means going to strip clubs, golf courses, and coca.

Queen. Beehin said, I think this is a recording. It's not a recording. It's just there's, like almost 900 of you here. And so I'm backed up. If you give me five or 10 minutes, hopefully I can get to your question.

Ifrada said, how to amicably end a relationship that's no longer serving you. You just gotta let him know, hey, it's been great getting to know you, but I'm not feeling a connection anymore, and I want to wish you the best of luck.

Koa said, indeed, Latrice amore is the brother I wish I had. Thank y'. All. Appreciate that. Love.

Joby said, what kind of men should a female comedian date?

Someone who gives you the spotlight. I was just watching the Grammys, and I was really intrigued by. There are a lot of men that would take a picture with their star girlfriends, wives, you know, make sure that the dress is really beautiful, laid out, and then.

Step away. Right. As a female comedian, you're gonna need to be with a guy that's able to do that. And oftentimes the nerds, the techies are able to do that, the engineers. So you might want to. You might want to, you know, engage with a guy like that.

Coley said, you are such a blessing. Thank you, girl. Lisa said, your advice is so cutthroat, but eye opening. I love it. Thank you.

Ty said, do hard wigs really work? I think the thing is, and I talked a little bit about this in my video about man pretty, but like, like, wealthier guys. Like, women with, like, messy hair, like that messy bun. Girl gets them every time. Girl gets them every time. So I think part of the hard wig is that.

I don't understand. Ken said, dates every week or Vacation every three months. I don't know what both.

Both and both and more.

Natax's dating question. Why would a guy spend all night talking to you, ask you to dinner and not text? Because he's living in the moment. Men are present. Nataxas dating question. Why would a guy spend all night talking to you, ask you to dinner and not text? Because he's living in the moment. Men are present minded creatures, so they're going to focus. If they're feeling good, they're going to say a lot of things in the moment. It doesn't necessarily mean that they're going to follow through with it. Yeah, minded creatures. So they're going to focus if they're feeling good, they're going to say a lot of things in the moment. It doesn't necessarily mean that they're going to follow through with it. Yeah. So take what they say as with a grain of salt.

Maya said, I can never get out of the talking stage. Maybe I'm just too much. Well, here's the gag, girl. There are some women that talk and have talking stages and there are some women that are being courted. Right.

Perhaps we need to learn how to be courted.

Which means that we can't be doing X, Y and Z and doing too much. I let these men come to us, honey.

Michelle, Cherise, thank you so much for the rose. Maya, thank you so much for the Ten roses. Michelle, thank you so much for the two ice cream cones.

Michelle, thank you so much for the ice cream cone. Nan, thank you so much for the Five Fires legacy. Thank you so much for the rose.

Ashley, thank you so much for the rose.

Okay, let me see what y' all are talking about.

La Chita said Oxnard in the house. I know that's right, girl. I used to live right by Oxnard College. No shade. Girl.

Let me see what's going on here.

L said, who is counseling men about dating? I don't know, girl, but I'm not. I barely like them. No shade.

Yeah, I'm focused on women because I love women and I'm focused on black women and brown women because I love them and I think they're amazing.

Ash said, how long is too long to not hear from him? As in left on red for four days. Lol. He apologized. But a here's the thing. He's not your boyfriend, so if he's not your boyfriend, he doesn't have to reach out to you every day. Yeah, that's number one.

Number two, you know, as you are evaluating these men, it's really important for you to figure out.

Would my future husband do this? Because here's the thing, here's the gag, girl.

When men like you, they like you and they, they put on a full court press and they do it in a sustained way. Oftentimes women are the ones that are kind of warming up to the idea. Right.

Brooke said, you're clearing me tonight. Oh, I'm saying it all with love, honey. All with love.

Rubbish. Said he doesn't want to buy me flowers like I requested, but wants to hang out. How should I view this? Well, I guess the question is why do you want flowers?

Let him know that you don't hang out, but that you're courted and that you and that you like dates.

That's it. Let them know what you like.

Vanessa said, is Amora Taurus? No, girl, I'm a cancer. Which means that I'm moody and I'm sensitive about my shit. Like Ms. Badu once said. Yeah.

Ty said, what to do if you're in a relationship with a man, you put on a pedestal, girl, you have to get on your own pedestal and be in line with him first and foremost. What does that mean? That means that you're going to have to be a bit more self centered and you're going to have to let that man serve you. Because when you put a man on a pedestal, you will serve him and you will do things for him because you're already censoring him. So you're going to have to censor yourself.

There are deeper things that you will need to do to allow yourself to do that. That's some of the work that we do in my program.

Yeah.

Holy see said I love the care that he answered with that. I love him. Thank you.

Felicia Said, if he says he is still married but separated, walk or give him a chance. We do not engage with separated men. I've been a dating coach for 14 years. It has never worked with a man that is separated.

Please understand that if a man is separated, what it means is. Well, let me just say this. I'm a dad. I have three kids and every morning my kids make their lunch and sometimes when they are making their sandwich, they will take the bread out of the sandwich loaf bag and they will forget to close the pantry door. And I will tell them.

When you start something, you need to complete it.

And things are not done until it is complete.

And I say all that to say that guys that are separated have not completed what they need to complete. And if they haven't completed this, there are probably other things that have not been completed. This is about follow through.

More than anything else.

The Juicy Apple style said, he wants to be my boyfriend. It's been five months. I'm not ready. Why aren't you ready, girl? Why aren't you ready? That's my question to you.

The reason I ask this is because some of us say that we're not ready, but some of us, our intuition is actually telling us that we shouldn't be with this guy.

Yeah. So I want to understand, is this something from your intuition or is it because.

We don't, you know, we have some intimacy, commitment issues?

Okay, let me see what else is going on here.

Juicy Applesauce says that's what it. It is. So should we stop dating? What is. I gave you two options, girl. Which one? Which option is your experience?

Rubbish. Duck. What do I do if I'm richer than the average guy around me? I always say that you want someone that's making at least 80% of what you make.

That's for people that make less than six figures, Right? If not, it probably won't work because he will often feel emasculated, intimidated, and want to humble you.

Millennial said, why do men flirt and seem interested but won't make a move? Because they don't want to be rejected. Guys are rejected like 90% of the time, and they're actually very sensitive about that. So they're testing the waters. The thing is, nowadays guys, they'll make the move on the second or third go around. Not on the first, the most part. Yeah. So talk to him a couple more times and then see if he makes the move. Depending on where you're at, if it's like at a gym or something where you guys are going to see each other often.

Li said, I've been on 16 dates since 2024 hit Babe. I'm sick of this. So, girl, let's. Let's look at this. So 16 dates and what, five weeks? Girl, that's like three dates a week. You going out with too many people. So what is your vetting, girl? You may not have a dating strategy if you going out.

With everybody. Girl. This is why in my program we focus on quality and not quantity. Because quantity, quantity will burn you out and you will hate dating in a month. And that's what's happening with my girl here. There has to be a significant dating analysis, vetting, filtering process so that you're only going out with relationship ready, high quality individuals. Yeah, if you're going out with everybody, Girl, you're going to get sick because 99 of the people that you meet are not going to be for you. By the way that she's doing it. Girl, Girlfriend's gonna have to go out with 100 guys before she meets her guy. I would be sick of it too. Honey. No shade Book by Brit says, hi, fairy Godbrother. Hey, girl.

Hey, girl.

Okay, let me see what's going on here.

Extra. Extra. I'm so diva. Should you go 5050 with a man or require him to pay for everything? We can't require men to do anything. Yeah. All we can do is sit back and see if he is, if. If he takes care of things. I think that 50, 50 men.

Are exhausting and will require you to do 5050 actually equals 8020 because.

Unfortunately women have to do invisible labor or generally do right. And so that's why I think that these guys should be taking care of all of the dates.

So you can share with him what you would prefer and he gets to choose whether he wants to do it or not.

Kala said, can friends with benefits become real love? I think that that rarely happens.

Like very rarely. Men put women into categories pretty quickly. And if you're a friends with benefit, then he already doesn't even think of you as a girlfriend.

Or you would be in the potential girlfriend category. There's like.

Jump offs. Friends with benefits, potential girlfriend. Let's see. Right. And sometimes that's public, sometimes that's private. That's why we get into so many situationships in that second category. And then the third category is wifey material where we are already playing house. Like Courtship is on 10. Yeah.

Vanessa said, what sign is your partner? My partner is a Virgo. I have two kids that are a Virgo and then another kid that's a cancer. What's your moon and rising? Girl, I don't know, girl.

Girl, where's my son? What's my moon? What's rising? What's going down? Girl, I don't know. I don't know if I'm coming or going. Girl, no shade.

Yeah.

Rubber said, for some reason I can't book a consultation. Girl, I might be booked. Girl. You might have to check tomorrow.

Yeah.

Let's see what's going on. Girl. Addie said, do you work with single moms? Yeah, I work with all women, girl.

All of them.

Let me see what's going on on IG Mr. Teddy Bay. How do I know if the man I'm dating is the one? I find myself having doubts all the time and I'M not sure if it's my fears or past traumas having an effect on my thoughts. I'd have to talk to you personally because I don't know your lived experience, I don't know your past. What's coming up for you? Yeah, these would be the things that I would we would have one on one conversations with in my VIP program to get a deeper understanding of what's really happening here. Okay. Salon said. Any advice on dating Jewish men? Five dates already. Well, sounds like things are going really well. I'd be interested like in the next month if things are going well. You all should probably be talking about exclusivity.

Renee Gustavna said, I just want to say hello. Hugs from Poland. Thank you girl. I appreciate it.

These are 494. Can you talk about African men? Are they different from black American men? Night and day, girl. Night and day.

Night and day. I'm going to do a video about it.

Nafisa said, it's complete theory by Amar Complete theory.

Honey. Girl, everything I say is a theory, girl. I guess, girl, I don't know. Cat said, Great analogy on where men who are separated have unfinished business. Leave them alone 100% because girl, the the gag is 50% of the time they go, they get back with the wife, girl.

You know what I mean? Jelly Bean book by Brits at Amore is cooking and clearing the table tonight. I'm trying my best. I'm doing what I can for God in my country. As my mother would say.

X estimates that you should write a book. I'm writing a book, girl. I'm in the process of writing a book. Someone said smokers question mark. Here's the gag.

Men are already going to live.

Or die younger than you are probably. If this guy is a smoker, you're probably gonna have to take care of him and be a caretaker later on in his life. Yeah.

Well, something to think.

NGXO said, why do some guys take forever to propose? Either they're not financially where they need to be or oftentimes it has to do with mommy issues because mom was so authoritarian that he needs to feel like he has control when it comes to being in a relationship with a woman.

Mellie says, do I need to be active on social media in order to start dating? No, not at all. Sinclair, thank you so much for the rose.

P said, how do I get past as a parents? If his appearance needs to get passed, then you literally need to pass him and his appearance. If it ain't working, it ain't working, girl. If you're not more attracted to him as you get to know him. You got to let him go.

Janelle said yes. And I find even when friends with benefits become serious, it's low effort relationship.

Okay. The bu ghetto bell says Hamworth. Hey girl.

P says is it good to play hard to get? I don't think that you should play anything. I think that you should be hard to get. That equals being the prize, right? If you have to play, then you're not really it.

What does that mean? It means be busy.

It means don't center men.

Yeah.

Ty said, thank you so much for your advice. Sounds like I need to sign up for your program. Yeah, girl, book that con. Book a consultation call. The link is in my bio and if all of the slots are already taken, email me Anwar, get your guy coaching.com and we'll. We'll find a slot for you. Yeah, things are quite busy these days with get your guy coaching which is a blessing for sure.

Queen AC sky said, what is a good third date idea? I think dinner. Dinner. If you haven't done anything like a fun activity, then do a fun activity. But if you have do dinner.

That you should be hard to get. That equals being the prize, right? If you have to play, then you're not really it.

Artsy gal said. Anwar, do you give discounts unemployed girly at the moment I don't generally give discounts. What does that mean? It means be busy.

It means don't center men.

Here's what I want to offer to you. If you're unemployed and you've been unemployed for a while, you're probably not ready to date. You want to be in a place where you're feeling stable, where you feel like you don't have to rely on anyone for money. Right? There are a lot of ladies that have either money wounds or are unemployed or underemployed that are dating to try to find a meal ticket because they're looking for someone to save them. Here's the gag. You need to save yourself. You need to be your own hero. You need to be your shero when it comes to your life. A man will not save you.

I repeat, a man will not save you. You will have to save yourself if you need saving. Yeah. I say that because some people are upset and want a soft life and want someone to change their entire life. It's not how it works. You have to be soft before you can have a soft life. And that happens before you meet the man. Right. Which means you have to have boundaries. You have to be doing things that bring you joy and pleasure.

So yeah.

Ty said, thank you so much for your advice. Sounds like I need to sign up for your program. Yeah girl book the con book a consultation call. The link is in my bio and if all of the wanted to offer that if it helps.

Cat says Is it love bombing when a guy says I'm his girl after the first date and how amazing I am? Yes.

Because you're not his girl.

But he's trying to skip he's trying to skip steps honey.

Right? It's low key or high key grooming.

Charmaine Said Hey Elmar, what do you think of an older woman who has never been married?

Well it depends. Sometimes those women are really smart and sometimes they might be judgmental bitches. No shade right. So it just like really depends.

And to the point where nobody wants to be in a relationship with them. So.

Who knows.

The slots are already taken. Email me Anwar get your guy coaching.com and we'll we'll find a slot for you. Yeah things are quite busy these days with get your guy coaching which is a blessing for sure.

Queen AC sky said, what is a good third date idea? I think that Christian Ting said Did you see the Drake drama? OMG yeah girl I saw Drake girl. Drake is toxic girl. And that that whatever that was is toxic too girl.

No shade but I think that he probably leaked that himself because he was he's not been in the news girl and he's a bit of a narcissist and he needs to be the center of attention.

And it said definitely purchasing the book. Yeah thanks girl. I appreciate that. I gotta finish this book first honey. Gotta finish it.

E. Bailey said, how do we have an exclusivity talk? That's something that I teach in my program right? So if you are interested in that definitely.

Come into the program. Also I also have a module in that in my dating strategy course right which is like a shorter canar dinner. If you haven't done anything like a fun activity then do a fun activity a course to teach you how to date.

How to but if you have do dinner.

Like date with strategy what to do on each date and also how to have the exclusivity conversation. Naveen said, I love this man. Thank you girl. I appreciate it.

Artsy gal said Anwar do you give discounts Unemployed girly at the moment I don't generally give discounts.

Let me see what y' all are talking about. Yoshi said MrB clearing am I? I'm just trying to give you my T Girl.

Commentary Said Think he got the D surgery to make bigger. So I've heard. Allegedly. Girl didn't look real to me.

Clonce Said, I'm new here but I love your content. Thank you girl welcome.

Char Said, if you have to play, you're not it. He is eating us down tonight. Lol. Love it. Thanks.

Said with love Honey, here's what I want to offer to you. If you're unemployed and you've been unemployed for a while, you're probably not ready to date. You want to be in a place where you're with love. Naveen thank you so much for the Five Roses. So six Six Roses Feeling stable where you feel like you don't have to rely on anyone for money, right? There are a lot of ladies that have either money Artsy Gal Said what do you think of the Luxy app? It's coming up. It's coming up in the ranks of I just recommended it to one of my clients just based on who she is and where she's at. So it's, it's, it's getting up there for sure.

Z for Zebra said, Do you coach 25 to 30 year old girlies? Yeah, 25, 26 is probably the youngest that I would coach just because the men are so wildly unserious at that age. Any wounds or are unemployed or underemployed that are dating to try to find a meal ticket, it really doesn't even matter. Like, lesser educated men will be ready to be married at 26, but if he is like educated, it's going to be 28 to 32 where they're going to be ready to to commit.

Because they're looking for someone to save them. Here's the gag. You need to save yourself. You need to be your own hero. You need to be your shero when it comes to your life. A man will not save you.

I repeat.

Ashlyn Said, what do you think about coffee dates? I like them. I recommend them for sure. A lot of people don't like them. I think it's a really great way to just understand do I like this person? Do I want to get to know more of him?

And actually I think some people think it's low effort. Guys that are more stable will actually lean into coffee dates versus trying to like impress you on a first date. They just, they want to know if you're worthy of being impressed first and foremost. So they'll be more apt to do a coffee date. The guys that will put out like all the stops are oftentimes Guys that are want to show things, right, have the BMW, but, you know.

Don'T have the money to really pay for it. Guys that are still renting and don't own property. Pete, a man will not save you. You will have to save yourself if you need saving. Yeah, I say that because some people are upset, right? Guys that do coffee dates oftentimes.

Are wealthier and want to understand it and want a soft life and want someone to change their entire life. It's not how it works. You have to be soft before you can have a soft life. If there's an roi to getting to know you more, if you're worth it, if you're worth it, I'm going to invest in you. But if not, we'll leave it where it is.

Ayan Nakai said, hi. Amor is an unmarried man without kids at age 40 of Red Flag. Well, I guess the question for you is, is an unmarried woman without kids at age 40 already a red flag? I don't think so.

1, 2, 3. Yep, it's me, Said Amore. What days do you go on live? Tuesdays and Sundays, for sure. Booked by Brit Said Amar. Your conversations are so therapeutic. Good. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. Allison Said in anore retreads. Thank you, girl. Appreciate that.

Candy said, I met a guy, super sweet, asked me to marry him after. And that happens before you meet the man, right? Which means you have to have boundaries. You have to be weak. He has six kids. No, girl, he wanted you to be a babysitter.

Doing things that bring you joy and pleasure.

So wanted to offer that if it helps.

No, ma'. Am. That ain't it, girl. That is not it.

Brit said it was big, though. We was all a little impressed.

Huh? Huh?

Don't be fooled, ladies. Don't be fooled if it. If this is. This is. This is a little. A little tea for y'. All. A lot of guys will.

Deposit, make it happen, and then record it shortly afterward to make it seem like it's bigger than it really is.

Normally.

We want.

Sandra said. The skin is skinning, by the way. Thank you, girl. I appreciate that. Jazz said, should I get my boy? Cat says, is it love bombing when a guy says I'm his girl after the first date and how amazing I am? Yes.

Cuz, you're not his girl.

But he's trying to skip. He's trying to skip step in a V day gift. Yes, girl, you should. I feel like he should be getting. Be getting me something. Yes, but you need to get Something that is low key and very thoughtful.

Clon said, size really doesn't matter.

If you say so, girl. If you say so.

I think there, there is a moment where size does.

Let me know in the comments, girls. Does it matter or does it not matter? I feel like there is a threshold here, girl. Some of these men, there ain't nothing you can do, girl. Some of these men aren't even knocking on the door, girl, let alone hitting the walls. So what are we to do with that? If he can't even knock on the door, how do I know that he's there?

End ups hunting.

Right? It's low key or high key anyway, girl. Anyway.

I don't know. Maybe I'm old school, honey. Maybe I need at least a knock. Eat grooming.

Charmaine said.

Who am I?

Books on nails said punches, baby. Yes. Hey, Anwar, what do you think of an older woman who has never been married?

Well, it depends. Sometimes those women are really smart and sometimes Journey said, I think it might matter if he's as a micro. I know a lot of people are saying, yes, it does matter. I know that's right, ladies. All right. That's why you my people, girl. Oh, Mel said, size doesn't matter.

Oh, girl, you might not be my people, girl.

Okay. Most of, most of y' all saying it matters. I think it does. Because also here's the thing. If it is smaller, sometimes they will have a complex about that and their manhood and their masculinity, girl.

Yeah, Some of these guys that are walking bow legged, quiet confidence, girl. Because they know they got it, they don't got to prove nothing. A lot of these remember that song Short Dick man, Girl. Some of these sdmn, honey.

Girl, they trying to compensate. They might be judgmental. No shade, right? So it just like really depends.

Girl. I don't need compensation unless it's workers comp.

And to the point where nobody wants to be in a relationship with them. So.

Who knows?

Unless it's short term disability.

Right?

Yeah. Ashlyn said, can't feel nothing, girl. You better doing it yourself, honey. No shade. Girl.

I'm so glad that we're all. Most of us are on the same page here. And here's the thing, here's the gag, girl. When you're. When you're with a guy that isn't. Doesn't really have much, then you gotta play the role, right? Then you gotta pretend like it's something and then you feel like a fool because you, you, you and him both know it's not anything, honey. And then you trying to, like, you know, it's like. You know those teachers that, like, really trying to find. You know there's a student that is like, just getting Fs and Ds and really trying to breathe life into that student that will never be an A student. No, Shade.

You plan yourself and you plan him.

Don't do it, girl. Don't do it.

It's gotta knock like that, girl. It's gotta knock like that at least. Honey, I gotta. I gotta hear something.

Yeah. Krishan Ting said, did you see the Drake drama? Omg. Yeah, girl, I saw Drake, girl. Drake is toxic, girl. And that. That. Whatever that some of the celibate girls are getting into this, honey. This is the most action they've had in years. No, Shade.

Yes, honey. Somebody said a Halle Berry actress. I know. That's right, Girl. Don't be that. Girl.

Don't be that. That's exhausting.

Shout out to my celibate girls that are getting their life right now.

Vanessa said, I used to lie so bad. I can't do that anymore. I know, right, honey? Because you know what happens, girl, when you lie, girl? Your nose becomes Pinocchio. And then when. If your nose is longer than his thing, girl. Girl, Girl. Becomes a very uncomfortable situation.

Yeah.

That was. Is toxic too, girl.

No, Shade. But I think that he probably leaked that himself because he was. He's not been in the news.

Yes, honey.

Like as he said, if it's a Vienna or pops out, girl, I can't do it, girl. And he's a bit of a narcissist and he needs to be the center of attention.

To. Sheba Khan said, all shade. No shade here, girl. All tea, girl. All tea, honey. We're having a meeting in the ladies room.

Be back real soon.

Honey. Book by Brit said, gotta knock like a Jehovah's Witness. I know that's right and wrong at the same time.

Let me see what y' all are talking about.

That's right, honey. No pretending.

I'm done with that, girl. I used to do that in the early 20s, girl. Not anymore. You know what happens if I. When I used to see something, honey, When I was older.

Put my hair back in, my.

Units are definitely purchasing the book. Yeah, thanks, girl. I appreciate that. I gotta finish this book first, honey. Gotta finish it, Bun. Honey, pick up my pocketbook and be on my way, honey. That's when I have my faux locs, sweetie.

I'm not doing it anymore.

E. Bailey said, how do we have an exclusivity top.

Not anymore. That's something that I teach in my program. Right. So if you are interested in that.

Sam said knock knock. But not a joke. I know that's right girl. I know that's right. User 6286 Girls do guys care about saggy boobs? Need me some input girl. They don't. Girl. They don't. No shade. Guys don't care about much of anything.

That's why when they're in the military and they're in the prison, girl, they'll do anything.

Anything. They don't care about it. They don't care.

Does she have said Sunny wants her question answered. For real? For real. Okay, let me see what's going on here. Where is Sunny? Girl, where is Sunny?

Met a 32 year old man he's been courting planning dates more than 10 years younger. What do you think?

I think that.

A lot of my clients have been getting success with guys that are six years definitely.

Come into the program. Also I also have a module in that in my dating strategy course. Right. Which is like a shorter quiz or younger. Ten years is quite a bit but if he's making it happen, girl.

See.

A course to teach you how to date.

How to like date with strategy, what to do on each date and also how to have the exclusivity conversation. Ms. Pearl said and he don't eat the kitty.

Honey, I'm glad we had this conversation so because.

This is, this is the real deal.

Right? Someone said rubbing together honey, if you want that girl, just go lesbian. No shade.

You know what I mean?

And no shade. Some of us have that fades girl.

Let me see what y' all are talking about.

Sunshine said, how can we book a session? Click the link in my bio if all the sessions are filled.

Naveen said, I love this man. Thank you girl. I appreciate it.

Send me an email. Anwar, get your guy coaching dot com.

Yeah.

Charmaine said, I think my trainer likes me. What are the signs? He's so sweet.

The signs are, does he talk to you outside of the training sessions and are the conversations more personal? Has he asked you out or wants to do things besides train you? Because trainers know how to sell and actually sometimes part of their shtick is to get you to really like them and to be like enamored with them. So what is he doing between the sessions? Is the question.

Natasha said, thanks for everything.

I think you meant you do.

Oh. Asha said, been thinking about it. All right girl. We do what we must. We do what we must, honey.

God. Oh my God. I'VE lost my place.

Let me see what y' all are talking about. Yoshi said, amor be clearing. Am I? I'm just trying to give you my tea, girl.

Commentary said, thank you. Let me find my place, ladies.

He got the d surgery to make bigger. So I've heard. Allegedly. Girl. Didn't look real to me.

Clonce said.

Kiwana said, celibacy here. All right, girl, we salute you.

Miss Nubian said, I need to learn how to pick the Mandingas because I always end up with the shrimps.

The Sheepicon said, anwar, stop. Why, girl?

Sugar on the FL said, ladies, do not settle for bad sex. I said it in one of my videos. Girl, love equals like plus lust. You got to make sure that that, that lust quotient is up there, honey. You know what I mean.

I'm new here, but I love your content. Thank you, girl. Welcome.

You gotta make sure that's right. Ashlyn said, you'll be unsatisfied and resentful.

Maritza said, I'm just here to heal.

Char said, if you have to play, you're not it. He is eating us down to hear you say no shade.

Chocolate. Luna said, I love it. Ladies room. That's right.

Kiwana said I used to lie and get extra mad when they cheat. Like, it's too small to try to cheat.

Here's the thing. The guys with the smallest things are oftentimes like the nicest guys. So they'll be able to get with a lot of different women because they just put on that nice charm because they're trying to compensate or over compensate.

Queen AC sky said, I am catnip to Nigerian guys and they are killing me. Help. I'm gonna do a video about African men. But y' all are gonna need to protect me, honey, because I don't. I don't want anybody. I don't want any of any of the African community coming for me. Now. African American men. I think I can handle my lol. Love it. Thanks.

Said with love, honey. Said with love. Naveen, thank you so much for the Five Roses. Six. Six Roses, the African community. I don't think I can handle.

Artsy gal. Said, what do you think of the Luxy app? It's coming up. It's coming up in the ranks. I just recommended it to one of my clients. Yeah.

To Sheba Concept. When did you get married? Oh, my God. Feels like almost 10 years ago.

So long. Feels like forever.

Coco. Mermaid Said. Hey, Amar. What are you doing up so late? Good question. What time is it?

Oh, okay, you know, here's the thing. I generally have my sessions.

My group calls tonight, and that really wakes me up. So I'm like, up, up, up. So actually these says, these lives bring me down. Yeah. JB said, we got you, Ruth. Thank you. Sabat said, us Africans got you good. Circuit said, as an African, I got you. Thank you, honey. Thank you so much.

Hs just based on who she is and where she's at. So it's, it's, it's getting up there for sure.

Books on nails. Does a man need to plan the dates? Yes.

Yes he does.

And see what else is going on here.

Karina, have you seen Drake's Glizzy? Yeah, I saw that dying honey.

Jade said, I found a white man from the inner city, Baltimore. Is it normal that I'm really nervous about him? Why are you nervous about him?

K said, I'm dating someone in the arts. Yay or nay? Is he high up in the arts or is he just getting started? That's the question.

Sandura said, if he wanted to, he would. Is that saying true? It's very much true.

It's very. That.

P Said guy keeps asking me to take me on a first date. How do I stop being shy and just go.

Z for zebra? Said, do you coach 25 to 30 year old girlies? Yeah, 25, 26 is probably the youngest that I would coach. Just because the men are so wildly unserious at that age on the day. Oftentimes we won't do that because we have, we, we have fear, we're scared. So the question for you is what are you scared of?

Yeah.

Francesca says, what does it mean when he says he's not ready for a relationship but doesn't want to lose you? It means he wants you in situationship, which means that he wants to use you for emotional support, probably intimacy, and you want someone to do things with, but he doesn't want to commit. He doesn't want to have emotional responsibility for you. You don't want those guys.

Tiffany said, I have put all my Mississippi friends on you. We love you. Thank you, girl. Well, you know, I got people in South Haven, Mississippi. That's where my, a lot of my family is, honey. So hopefully I'm a.

I'm a Mississippian.

It really doesn't even matter. Like.

Lesser educated men will be ready to be.

Name Said, Any advice on British guys coming from a black British woman? You want to get the guys that can speak, that can share their feelings. Most British guys can't. Culturally speaking, they're not really used to sharing their feelings. So married at 26, but if he is like educated, it's going to be 28 to 32 where they're going to. You're going to have to really look out for that. When you're evaluating these guys, be ready to, to commit.

I am. Briona said, I can't seem to stop attracting men who want only want friends with benefits. I make it clear that I'm not interested, but it happens time after time. It might be how you're dressed, it might be.

That they're not having. They're not feeling an emotional connection to you because you're maybe not being vulnerable. So they're just thinking they're trying to connect in other ways, like physically or intellectually. Right. Something to think about.

Sam said, I love your content. Thank you, girl.

Jazzy said, why do guys follow IG models? And is it a red flag? No, it's entertainment. Just like many of you all are, are following gossip, you know, profiles, right? To be entertained. This is how men are entertained.

Extra, extra.

Ashlyn said, what do you think about I'm so diva. Can a single mom, one child still get a good guy? 100%. 100%.

Copy dates. I like them. I recommend them for sure. A lot of people don't like them. I think it's a really great way to just understand.

Manny Max said, hi. Can you say happy birthday to my mate Jason? Happy birthday, Jason.

Sam Arise said, tomboy advice.

Well, girl, give me on a scale from 0 to 10, what level are you at when it comes to tomboy? Because that will directly affect the advice that I give you.

Let me see what you're talking about.

Hard to do. I like this person. Do I want to get to know more of him?

And actually I think some people think it's low effort. Guys that are more stable will actually lean into coffee dates versus trying to like impress you on a first date. They just, they want to know if you're worthy of being impressed first and foremost. So they'll be more apt to do a coffee date. The guys that will put out like all the stops are oftentimes guys that are want to show things, right, have the BMW but, you know.

Don'T have the money to really pay for it and love to dance. Want to see where things can go with a guy I reconnected with. Should I initiate this conversation? No.

No. I mean, are you guys already talking? I guess that's the question more than anything else.

Nicole G. Said, you're so smart. Thank you, girl. Stacy Guys that are still renting and don't own property. Right.

Guys that do coffee dates oftentimes.

Are wealthier and want to understand if you're. If there's an ROI to getting to know you more. So even if he was married and he's looking for a second wife, if that is something that you're into, girl, rock out.

Harris said, do you believe in the treatment like trash concept? No, I don't. But I do think it's important if you're worth it. If you're worth it, I'm going to invest in in you. But if not for you to have very clear and healthy boundaries.

Fairy Charm said advice for German men.

I lived in Germany for a couple of years in Berlin and Hamburg, and in that time, I think I was proposed to about three times. We'll leave it where it is.

Hi. Amar is an unmarried man without kids at age 40 of Red Flag. Well, I guess the question for you is, is an unmarried woman without kids at age 40 a red flag? I don't think.

1, 2, 3. Yep, it's me. German men are hard exterior, but very soft interior. Once you can penetrate that hard shell, you will have them forever. What that looks like in terms of, like, you know, being with them is actually being vulnerable. It sounds funny, but actually being emotional. Amor. What days do you go on life? Tuesdays and Sundays, for sure. Book by Brit said, animal. Your conversations are so therapeutic. Good. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. Allison said in Animal Retreat allows and inspires them to actually express their emotions because culturally speaking, you know, that's something that's frowned upon. You're supposed to be very stoic as a German. So the fact that you're able to be emotional and let them know, you know, I'm feeling really stupid sad right now. I'm upset. It will actually inspire them to want to do that and they will feel actually miss. Thank you, girl. Appreciate that.

Candy said, I met a guy, super sweet, asked me to marry him after a week. He has six kids. No, girl. He wanted you to be a babysitter.

No, ma'. Am. That ain't it, girl. Much more connected to you.

Swaggy. The chow Chow. Thank you so much for the rose.

Louis, that is not it.

Brit said it was big, though. We was all he said. What if he has mental disorders and keeps blocking and unblocking me because of misunderstandings? Girl, that sounds like a lot. You want to do that for the rest of your life?

I don't think you do.

This, like, relationship Thing should be easy.

A little impressed.

Huh? Huh?

Don't be fooled, ladies. Don't be fooled.

Stem toy said, I'm a plus size, girly. Where can I find the gamer bros? Like, do I need to start playing Call of Duty? Yeah, girl. Get on, Twitch, honey, Get on. If it. If this is. This is. This is a little. A little tea for y'. All. A lot of guys will.

Deposit, make it happen, and then.

You know, go to tech conferences, go to Comic Con.

Go to Renaissance fairs, Dungeons and Dragons, girl. Pokemon, go, honey. When you go in place and record it shortly afterward to make it seem. Seem like it's bigger than it really is.

You're welcome. Invite me to the wedding normally.

We want. Janelle said, your lives are my favorite. Thank you, girl.

Sandra said, the skin is skinning, by the way. Thank you, girl. I appreciate that. Jaz said, should I get my boyfriend.

And a V Day gift? Yes, girl, you should. I feel like he should be getting. Be getting me something. Yes, but you need to get something that is lowkey and very thoughtful.

Clon said, size really doesn't matter.

If you say so, girl. If you say so.

All right, my loves. I think I'm going to go.

Don't wait. D said, you say to watch out for. When dating men in the military. What about veterans?

I think that.

I think there. There is a moment where size does.

Let me know in the comments, girls, does it matter or does it not matter? I feel like there is a threshold. The PTSD is still there.

Right?

So. And that's the thing that you have to be aware of the most.

So something that you're going to need to consider, girl. Some of these men, there ain't nothing you can do, girl. Consider and observe.

As you get to know the veteran. Some of these men aren't even knocking on the door, girl, let alone hitting the walls. So what are we to do with that? If he can't even knock on the door, how do I know that he's there?

Yeah.

Good. All right, ladies. Anyway, girl, anyway.

I don't know. Maybe I'm old school, honey. Maybe I need at least a knock.

Who am I?

Books on nail said punches, baby. Yes. I'm gonna hit it. I'm gonna hit it. Hit it, hit it. I hope that this was informative and beneficial for you. And if you want to learn more, go to the link in my bio. I have lots of free offerings. Check out the podcast. Keep on coming to these lives. And if you want to work professionally with me, definitely book a call and we'll Journey said, I think it might matter if he's has a micro. I know a lot of people are saying, yes, it does matter. I know that's right, ladies. All right. That's why you my people, girl. Oh, Melissa, size doesn't matter.

Oh, girl, you might not be my people, girl. See if it's a good fit. No pressure though. Alrighty. Hope this was helpful for you and that you learned something. Have a good night. I'll talk with you soon. Bye. Bye.

Okay, most of. Most of y' all saying it matters. I think it does. Because also here's the thing. If it is smaller, sometimes they will have a complex about that and their manhood and their masculinity, girl.

Yeah, some of these guys that are walking bow legged, quiet confidence, girl. Because they know they got it, they don't gotta prove nothing. A lot of these remember that song, Short Dick man, girl. Some of these SDM men, honey.

Girl, they trying to compensate.

Girl. I don't need compensation unless it's workers comp.

Unless it's short term disability.

Right?

Yeah. Ashton said can't feel nothing. Girl. You better doing it yourself, honey. No shade. Girl.

I'm so glad that we're all. Most of us are on the same page here. And here's the thing, here's the gag, girl. When you're. When you're with a guy that isn't. Doesn't really have much, then you gotta play the role right. Then you gotta pretend like it's something. And then you feel like a fool because you, You. You and him both know it's not anything, honey. And then you trying to like, you know, it's like. You know those teachers that like really trying to find, you know there's a student that is like just getting Fs and Ds and really trying to breathe life into that student that will never be an A student. No, shade.

You plan yourself and you plan him.

Don't do it, girl. Don't do it.

It's gotta knock like that. Girl. It's gotta knock like that at least. Honey, I gotta. I gotta hear something.

Yeah.

Some of the celibate girls are getting into this. Honey. This is the most action they've had in years. No shade.

Yes, honey. Somebody said a Halle Berry actress. I know that's right. Girl, don't be that. Girl.

Don't be that. That's exhausting.

Shout out to my celibate girls that are getting their life right now.

Vanessa said, I used to lie so bad. I can't do that anymore. I know. Right, honey? Because you know what happens, girl, when you lie, girl, Your nose becomes Pinocchio. And then when. If your nose is longer than his thang, girl. Girl. Becomes a very uncomfortable situation.

Yeah.

Yes, honey.

Legacy said, if it's a Vienna or pops out, girl, I can't do it.

To Sheba Khan. Said all shade. No shade here, girl. All tea, girl. All tea, honey, we're having a meeting in the ladies room.

Be back real soon.

Honey. Book by Brit said, gotta knock like a Jehovah's Witness. I know that's right and wrong at the same time.

Let me see what y' all are talking about.

That's right, honey. No pretending.

I'm done with that, girl. I used to do that in the early 20s, girl. Not anymore. You know what happens if. If I. When I used to see something, honey, when I was older.

Put my hair back in my bun, honey, pick up my pocketbook and be on my way, honey. That's when I have my faux locs, sweetie.

I'm not doing it anymore.

Not anymore.

Sam said, knock knock. But not a joke. I know that's right, girl. I know that's right. User6286 Girls, do guys care about saggy boobs? Need me some input, girl. They don't. Girl. They don't. No, shade. Guys don't care about much of anything.

That's why when they're in the military and they're in the prison, girl, they'll do anything.

Anything. They don't care about it. They don't care.

Deia said Sunny wants her question answered. For real? For real. Okay, let me see what's going on here. Where is Sunny? Girl, where is Sunny?

Met a 32 year old man. He's been courting, planning dates more than 10 years younger. What do you think?

I think that.

A lot of my clients have been getting success with guys that are six years or younger. Ten years is quite a bit. But if he's making it happen, girl.

See?

Ms. Pearl said, and he don't eat the kitty.

Honey, I'm glad we had this conversation so. Because.

This is. This is the real deal.

Right? Someone said rubbing together. Honey, if you want that girl, just go lesbian. No shade.

You know what I mean?

And no shade. Some of us have that fade. Squirrel.

Let me see what y' all are talking about.

Sunshine said, how can we book a session? Click the link in my bio. If all the sessions are filled, send me an email. Anwar, get your guy coaching dot com.

Yeah.

Charmaine said, I think my trainer likes me. What are the signs. He's so sweet.

The signs are, does he talk to you outside of the training sessions? And are the conversations more personal? Has he asked you out or wants to do things besides train you? Because trainers know how to sell and actually, sometimes part of their shtick is to get you to really like them and to be, like, enamored with them. So what is he doing between the sessions is the question.