Anwar White warns that early future pacing, when someone talks about honeymoons or engagement within weeks of dating, is a form of love bombing. He says to stay present because tomorrow isn't promised, citing 2020 as proof.
Chapters
The other thing that I want to talk about when it comes to Love Bombers is love Bombers will actually talk about things that are happening in the far distant future, right? So let's say you're talking to a guy and you've just been talking to him for a couple of weeks. You maybe have gone on one date with them and he's already talking about, oh, man, I want to take you to Paris, right? Like, you know, when we get engaged, like, our honeymoon is going to be in Hawaii and da, da, da, da. If he's starting to make plans in the distant, distant future, a red flag. You don't want anyone to do that again. He is perpetuating this fantasy. He's making you fall in love with this fantasy so that he can do whatever he wants. It works. That's why they do it. But I want you to be here to the game, girl. I want to make sure that you understand that.
Tomorrow is not even promised, girl. Like we saw that in 2020, like million, like million people died globally. So let's live in now, let's live in the present. Because here's the thing, he's so focused on the future.
That's also kind of a red flag because most men are very much living in the present moment. This is why there's a huge disconnect between when women and men are dating each other. Because women, right, and tell me if you are guilty of this, you'll go on a date or two and then you'll be thinking about so much about the future, like, oh my God, it would be so cool if we went here or if we were dating and we were going here or my mom would love him or all of that other stuff, right? That's some of the thoughts that would be in our mind, right? Men are not like that in general. They're very present minded. So that's why women really do set the pace of their relationship because they're able to understand what the future of it looks like.
So if he's giving distant future plans, red, red, red, red, red flag.
