A short monologue advising someone (Paris) on overcoming people-pleasing behavior. The speaker explains that people-pleasing stems from valuing others' approval above self-worth—often rooted in parental influence—and recommends ‘rejection therapy’ (exposure to rejection) with concrete exercises (e.g., asking for discounts or money) to habituate surviving ‘no’. The speaker also frames people-pleasing as a form of inauthenticity and manipulation.
Chapters
Paris said, can you give me tips on stop being a people pleaser? Here's what I know. If you're a people pleaser, it is because you think that you value other people liking you more than you like yourself. And you feel like the only way that you are to be loved is if you do what other people say. And this oftentimes comes from your parents. And so respectfully, you're going to have to grow up and you're going to have to learn how to not be liked. And so, interestingly enough, one of the things that's really helpful is to go through what I call rejection therapy.
Two things that you can do. I know this sounds really scary, but it's super helpful because your fear is being judged and being rejected. So you're actually just gonna have to have exposure therapy to that. So go, go to. Well, maybe not Starbucks right now, but go to a store and ask for 10% off. Yeah. And be ready for them to say no. Or.
Be on the street and ask somebody for a dollar.
You're going to have to learn that it is okay for people to say no to you and that you will still survive. Like you. You literally have to prove that to your. To like your nervous system and your body. Yeah. Because here's the thing. You can't please everybody. And no shade but people pleasing is manipulation. Yeah. Because you're not really being your. Your true authentic self. You're doing, you're being someone so that someone different than who you naturally are for people to like you.
So it's kind of like the other side of manipulation.
