Dating coach Anwar White breaks down how men actually use dating apps: they like many profiles then message only those who reply. To stand out, use photos that signal you're serious, not just attractive. Smile with teeth, include black-and-white shots, skip the sunglasses, and keep skin covered.
Questions this video answers
13 years.
May 22, 2025.
107% more likes.
90% of the time.
They will like about 100 profiles in a sitting and typically get about 10–15 responses back.
Chapters
Your Instagram or whatever. Yeah. One of the first things I think is like, can I afford this girl's lifestyle? Oh, hey, girl. So this is 100% correct. When men are looking at your pictures, whether on social media or on dating apps, they are making an assessment. They're making two assessments, specifically. One, affordability, and two, seriousness. So affordability is can I afford this woman? Right. Whether she's going out on trips a lot or going to expensive restaurants or she's just going to your local Cheesecake Factory or Waffle House or whatever it may be. The other level is seriousness. Right. And is she a one night stand? Is she a potential girlfriend or is she a potential wife? And this is all based on pictures. So you want to make sure that you're curating your pictures. Well, the thing that I do and what I recommend for my clients, I'm a dating coach. My name is Anwar White. I've been a dating coach for 13 years. I help black and brown women get into the most amazing relationships. I always tell them, always smile with teeth. Warmth always trumps sexiness. Especially if you're a woman of color. You don't want to give that come hither face because you're going to attract things that are not going to fully serve you. Also, you always want to have a black and white pic. That is something that is going to differentiate you from everybody else. Black and white pics actually get 107% more likes. The other thing that I want to represent is you want to minimize skin. Right. And you want to not have the sunglasses because the eyes are the windows to the soul, apparently. So that is really important as we're talking about pictures. Okay. So many women out there will want to just show pictures of them traveling, and that's not really representing their full lives because ultimately men are looking at your pictures and trying to envision themselves in your life.
The other way that men are actually navigating dating apps. And this might be surprising to you because I think a lot of women think that men are really lazy on apps and they're actually not. They're just doing it differently. So most men will actually like a hundred, like, profiles in a sitting and see what comes back. And then whoever responds back, that's who they're going to engage with. Because men are very sensitive about rejection. They're getting rejected 90% of the time on these apps. So they want to figure out, okay, who's interested in me. So they'll give you the hey or hey, beautiful for a lot of messages. You want to respond to that and then see what comes of it. Because out of 100, they might get 10, maybe 15 people that will respond back, and then they'll start to really engage fully. So respond back to the hey or the hey, beautifuls and see what happens. I hope this helps. And if you want more help in terms of how to navigate online dating, book a call with me. I'd love to help.
