Anwar WhiteExpert dating coach Anwar helps women of color heal their hearts, date with strategy, and get their guy!

How to not want to be chosen?

Name: How to not want to be chosen?
Uploaded: 2025-01-17T13:00:45+00:00
Duration: 1 min 38 s
Channel: Anwar White
Description: A short single-speaker monologue (YouTube) arguing that to stop wanting to be chosen you must choose yourself. The speaker reframes feminine energy as…

17 Jan 2025 · 2 min

Watch on YouTube

1:38

A short single-speaker monologue (YouTube) arguing that to stop wanting to be chosen you must choose yourself. The speaker reframes feminine energy as centering personal pleasure and recommends prioritizing comfort and convenience (e.g., hiring help, buying things for pleasure) even when that challenges cultural expectations for Black and Brown women. Repetition and examples are used to emphasize self-love and independence.

Chapters

Someone said how to not want to be chosen.
The way that you stop wanting to be chosen is by choosing yourself.
That everything has got to be about you and your pleasure, which is really the essence of feminine energy. So everything's got to be about you.
And that these guys, like, you can take them or leave them.
That's what this is about. And not just these guys. You can take or leave anybody or anything.
Yeah.
That'S what this is about.
When you choose yourself, you're not waiting on anyone. No one.
You can't even see anyone. You're just, like, so in love with yourself.
That's what it looks like. It means prioritizing what you want and what you need. It means buying the things that you want that you need, not for just necessity, but for pleasure.
What does this mean? This means getting things like a housekeeper so you don't have to clean your house. And I know that's sacrilege to even talk about when it comes to black and brown women. That's what it looks like.
Choosing your comfort, your convenience, and your pleasure.
Over what others may think or feel about me.
Yeah.
Okay.