What should you do when you hear this from a guy?

Someone said, what does it mean when a guy tells you, I really fucks with you? I really do.

I don't even think that's grammatically correct. So it doesn't mean anything.

Does he say that to his mother?

What?

Like, people.

Sometimes.

Like, we cannot let these things slide.

Like.

Okay, so one of the things that you have to think about.

Like, when you are dating is like, would I have a kid with this man? Like, do you want this man saying to your child, I really with you?

Never that, girl. Well, maybe for men, some of you, sometimes that. I don't know.

Here's what I know.

I know that sometimes, like, I don't. I am. I'm okay being.

Bitchy if it means I have standards.

And sometimes many of you don't.

Want to be that girl.

And there is. Because when we do that.

There'S like this. This feeling of stepping away from the tribe.

Yeah. When I say, oh, I'm not gonna. I'm not doing that.

Right.

It's really hard to say, I'm not going. I'm not going to. With you.

Oh, I can't. Like, I can't. You guys.

Sometimes these men grow, like, girl, they're. No, but in all seriousness, what happens when. In the black community, it's very much a community. It's very much a tribe. And so when you say, I'm not really, like, going to deal with hood guys or, you know, sometimes black guys, it can feel like you are literally leaving the tribe, that you are being banished from the tribe.

And that feels like abandonment, and it feels like death.

And if that's the case, girl, die.

Come back to life as a vampire girl, I don't care.

But we have to let that go.

I need us to stop dating the bad boys.

If you're a church girl, if you were a school girl and you are intrigued by a man that says, I with you.

Please understand that that man.

Here's what I know. I know that there is an attraction there, and there's an attraction there because y' all are talking shit about some of these questions. But there's. There's actually important information to know about these. These questions, and this is why I answer them.

When we lean into that. There are a couple of things that are happening here. One.

These men are dangerous, but it's because you feel unsafe in your life and you think that they are going to protect you, when in reality, they are scarier and more dangerous than the life that you are leading right now.

So your opportunity is finding safety within yourself.

Okay.

This is important.

So that happens.

I already talked about the tribal mentality.

I also understand and know that if you are a good girl.

Then you will get with a bad boy because you want to be bad. And he gives you permission to explore that part of yourself. But I'm here just to offer to you that you don't need a man to help you explore the totality of who you are. That's your job.

Okay. I hope this is helpful because.

Yeah.