Anwar White explains why first dates shouldn't go too long. Dragging them out leads to what he calls a 'flame out' pattern, where the spark dies before anything real starts.
Just a girl watching. TikTok said, I'm listening. Went on a date with a white gentleman on Saturday. Date lasted 10 hours. But I don't know, girl. Why are you slumber partying? These dates.
A first date should be like an hour and a half at most.
Other dates should be 2 to 3 hours. 10 hours is way too much. That's a boundary violation, girl.
Kiana said, why is 10 hours too much? I think so, but I want to hear why you say so. Because the first date is really about understanding. Do I want to learn more? Did I laugh and have fun?
Yeah.
These are boundary issues. He doesn't get to have access to you like that.
It's too much. When you slumber party, you actually you're giving too much. You're in charge of pacing the courtship in all of your relationships. And if you don't know how to do that, what will happen is you will create a dating pattern that I call a flame out. Have you ever gotten along well with a guy and then after a week or two, you feel like, oh my God, we don't have anything to talk about? That's the flame out dating pattern. And if you go hard and have a 10 hour date, just understand this. You could have one 10 hour date or you could have five two hour dates. What would you prefer?
Yeah.
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Dating Pitfalls of the Smart and Successful Woman - Get Your Guy Podcast S1 E2
