Dating coach Anwar White lays out specific timelines for relationships: ask someone out within a week, go exclusive in 2.5 to 3 months, get engaged within 2 years. He lists red flags to leave over, like silent treatment and repeated unmet requests, and gives three safe ways to end things with sample scripts.
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Girl, the biggest regret that women have in dating is not leaving a relationship or a guy soon enough. And the reason is because most women are conditioned and programmed to be ride or dies. And let me tell you right now, girl, if you're a ride or die, you're gonna die in love and relationships and dating. So I want you to think of dating like this. Just like poker. The best poker players fold most of their hands as quickly as possible to get to the best hand. And this is how I want you to date. If you don't do that, you will lose all of your money, all of your heart, very quickly. As a dating coach for 14 years and as your fairy godbrother, I wanted to share with you when, why and how you should leave a guy in dating and relationships. So, girl, my clients call me the love umpire because I'm either telling them that these guys are out or that they should be out. So if I say out, this means you should be out. So let's start with the when. If a guy has not asked you out in a week, when you first get to know him, you're out. Get out of there. If he's not setting up a date once a week, you're out of there. If you're dating a good guy but you're not attracted to him and attraction hasn't increased within two to three weeks, you're out of there. If after two and a half to three months, you all are not in an exclusive relationship, you're out of there. If at two years you are not engaged or married, you're out of there. Okay? So those are some time boundaries to give you an understanding of when you should leave a guy. Okay. And if he's not ready, because a lot of these guys are not relationship ready. Now let's talk about the why. Because that is also very important. Girl, if you've made a pros and cons list, it's a con. You're out of there. Yeah. If you are not able to express your feelings and you're scared that that's going to create conflict, you gotta leave. Okay? If you feel like a broken record and you continue to repeat yourself over and over and over again and nothing is changing, you're out of there. If you're giving your guys timelines already, you need to be out of there. If you are making excuses for him and why you're still in the relationship. My family likes him. I'm bored. I don't want to get back on the dating scene. You need to go. If he's creating silent treatments or cannot resolve conflict calmly, you're out of there. If you're always asking yourself on a weekly basis or a monthly basis if I should break up with him, you need to be out of there. Now. I know this is really hard. Most women don't want to feel like a bitch, don't want to feel rude, don't want to feel guilty. But I want you to understand that these men are grown as men and they can handle themselves. And oftentimes women think, oh, my God, because I have been in that situation, I don't want to put someone else in that situation. Men will actually think about these situations differently and it will affect them differently, especially early on in the courtship. He's going to be happy that you're telling him that he doesn't need to spend money, time, and energy on you because you're not feeling it at the end of the day. So please understand that when you're sharing these things, oftentimes it's a win win. Now, how should you leave a guy three ways? Via text, via phone call, or in person in a public place? The last thing that you want to do is have this conversation in a private setting, because some guys can react very differently and oddly. And I want to make sure that you're safe at the end of the day. Now, if you haven't engaged with a guy for a long time, just give him three sentences. Hey, thanks so much for the date. I'm not feeling a connection and I want to wish you the best of luck. Now, if you're in a relationship with him, you might want to extend that a little bit. But these conversations should not last more than one to two minutes. You want to keep it short and brief. I hope this helps you. If you need help with these boundaries, with speaking up and finding your voice and dating and relationships, definitely book a call with me.
