Two people discuss why we stay in situationships: we feel unworthy of better, believe love is scarce, or accept crumbs as normal. Planning a weekend trip signals you want a real partner. The pattern keeps you from finding someone who actually shows up.
Let me see what's going on. Kayla said how to bring up a.
Weekend trip idea with a slight situationship.
I think that.
You trying to do a weekend trip with a situationship is.
Respectfully speaking, delusional because weekend trips are for boyfriends. And so what that means is that you, in your head, you think that you are his girlfriend. And that is one of the biggest.
Things that happens in situationships.
They say a situationship is only a situationship to one person.
The other person just thinks that you're hanging out. Right.
And so one of the things that.
I think is important for you to.
Understand is why you are staying in a situationship.
Because a situationship could never fully fulfill.
All of your needs.
So that lets me know that there might be some deeper work for us to think about. And sometimes it's a worthiness issue.
I don't feel worthy of a full.
On relationship or I don't think I.
Can actually achieve it. That's a mindset issue.
The other thing is that we might.
Have what I call love scarcity mindset.
You have something and you think that that something is the best that you can do. So you'd rather have something, even if it's not fully, fully serving you, than.
Than have nothing at all. But I want to offer to you that having nothing at all is actually.
A better situation because when you are engaged with someone who is just giving you level 5, level 6 out of 10 treatment, you will, you will.
Really.
Trick yourself.
And normalize that as your.
What I call your upper limit of love.
And so you will only lean into and find guys that can give you that five or six.
Because in your head you think that.
That'S all that you can, that you deserve, right? When you have a, when you don't have anyone, it opens up the possibility.
Of you getting a 9 or a.
10 and like, doesn't give you an.
Upper limit of love, if that makes sense. Yeah, I hope that's helpful. And that is said with so much love and so much respect because it's not easy.
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Dating Pitfalls of the Smart and Successful Woman - Get Your Guy Podcast S1 E2
