Anwar White argues you don't need to lose weight to start dating. Instead of self-criticism, practice daily affirmations and embodied confidence so you're not chasing validation from partners. When you meet your own emotional needs first, you attract people who actually match your baseline rather than those only interested in your body.
Chapters
Poison. I said not gonna lie. I feel like I need to lose a few pounds before I date. No, girl, you don't. That's the. That's. That's the tea.
You don't.
You don't have to lose anything except for the mindset that's not serving you.
Yeah, you gotta love that. You gotta love the body. You gotta. Every day, you gotta be like, so. 15 years ago, my sister would give me so much shit because I'd be in the mirror, be like, oh, my God, I'm just, like, so pretty. I can't even believe it. Like, oh, my God, look at me. It's. I'm amazing. Like, I would just talk all this shit to myself because that's what you need to do. Especially when you're about to go out for the day. When you're out in public, girl, you gotta let these hoes know, girl, you're it.
You are it. And you have to remind yourself of that.
That's what it looks like.
Yeah.
In. In the privacy of your own home. Until. Until you believe it, girl. Fake it till you make it. Because if you hear something enough, you will believe it. Every morning while you getting ready, please understand that those times in the morning that you're getting ready, if you're putting on makeup or you're doing your hair, that's the time to be just giving. Giving yourself all that love, all that tea. Oh, my God, let me do my hair. Oh, my God, I'm so pretty. I'm so gorgeous. I'm, like, amazing.
Oh, my God. The Lord made a masterpiece. I am the masterpiece of Michelangelo. Like, just give your, like, talk all that, girl. Right, and just, like, crack yourself up. Yes, exactly. So. So Steph said, I say, lord, why did you make me so fine? Exactly. You see how I'm. I'm bringing the hair behind my ear, girl, and I have no hair. That's how beautiful I feel.
Yeah.
That's it, honey. Oh, my God, I'm so amazing. Like, I can't even believe it. Like.
That'S it. Why?
Because everything that you feel like you need, you are going to have to provide for yourself before you allow a man to provide it for you.
Why? Because if you don't and you have some of these voids or these needs that are unfulfilled, any little something that a guy gives you, you're going to, like, be so thirsty for because you're not able to provide it for yourself.
Yeah. So, like, especially for those smart girls that were always complimented based on how smart they were. What I often see is, like, the guys that are like, oh, my God, you're so beautiful. It hits them different because they're not told that enough when they were growing up, and so they're going to gag on that. And the guys that are telling you that shit, they're the lowest of the low because they're about the physicality. They're not about the totality of you as a woman.
So you got to give yourself the things that you're looking for from a man so that when you are with a man, he's going to have to meet what you're giving yourself or exceed it.
