Why are kids so emotional?

Frank, how. How much do you think you know about what your daughter's thoughts are and what she's thinking, what she's going through?

Yeah.

You know, like, I. I often wonder, you know, do I know enough? Do I? Do I? You know, my son's obviously almost 15 years old, so do I give him too much time to be, you know, doing God knows what on online and whatnot?

Yeah.

Is there. Is there more going on than I'm aware of? Am I naive? Am I the dad? Oh, he'll never get away with anything because, you know, I did it all, but, you know.

Oh, yeah, but you did it all when technology was not right now.

I did not have what he has.

Yeah. Honestly, I have no idea how much I know that goes on in my little girl's head, you know, I mean, and granted, for. For my situation, it's a little bit different because she's on the, like, the autistic spectrum, so she. She can't verbalize as much as. As like a kid her age right now. And then sometimes, like, when I ask her, like, specific questions, I feel like she's not grasping exactly, like, what I'm asking in those moments, but she knows. And I mean, honestly, I don't know. I don't know if I know what's going on in her mind, you know? And like you were saying, like, I wonder if that's the. That's the scary part is, like, I.

Mean, do you want to know?

Yeah, in some cases I want to know, but probably not in all of them.

I mean, I. There. I want to know that he's being honest with me.

Yeah.

I want to know that he's not, you know, interacting with people, you know, like strangers and things like that. So I've got to be cognizant of what, you know, he's doing online. And I am, for the most part. Yeah. You know, he doesn't realize it, but. And he won't ever watch this, I hope, but, you know, I. I've got my face recognition set up on his phone, so all I got to do is pick it up, look at it and.

Yeah, and you're golden.

Yeah, so. And I'm in. So, you know, I do check on, you know, and I'll look at the history and do that from time to time and make sure, you know, and when we're talking, ask questions like, you know, like I said before, like, he's made friends in the UK and in different states around the country that from gaming, I got to make sure that those people are who they say they are.

Yeah.

Uh, he's smarter than I thought because I come to find out he doesn't give his real name.

That's amazing. Street cred. Street smarts right there.

Yeah. So, yeah, he gets that from me.

Bro. But it's just so trippy to think, like, right now we. We're in a. We're in a time, right? And I think. I think Riley qualifies for Gen Z.

He does, right?

He's in Jen. He's a Gen Z. Er. But, like, we're in a time where we've never been more connected by technology, but we've also never been more disconnected, personally.

That's so true.

You know what I mean? So it's like, it's. It's really, really weird and I'm like.

An oxymoron, you know?

It's just literally like, bro, we're in a time where somebody would rather text you saying I love you than say it to you in person because it's too hard to say it in person or ask you out. You know what I mean? Like, sliding into the DMs is the number one way to, like, reach out to a girl right now, instead of approaching her, you're.

I. I don't know if. If you did this, but when I was in, like, I don't know, sixth grade or whatever, you know, hey, Cindy likes you. Do you like her? Check, yes or no? Yes. Yes.

I did the notes. Mine were paper balls because we were, like, in cubicles. Yeah. And so I would just wad it up and chunk it across the classroom when the teacher wasn't looking.

That's awesome. But so even then, without technology, in a way, we too did that just because, you know, as when you're just easier than, you know, you have the balls to go up to somebody when you're inexperienced and you haven't done it before. You know, of course it's easier to do that. But communication with us, I want them to talk.

Yeah.

I want him to talk to me and communicate because. And that's one thing that I'm aware of, that he's not good at communicating, generally speaking. And that's not good because, you know, if his first job, I mean, he. Maybe he won't be able to be in sales because he doesn't know how to talk to people.

Yeah.

You know, so that's something that, you know, I'm trying to work on and I just don't know how. I mean, there's certain, I guess when. When we're in a Social atmosphere, which isn't often, but when we are.

Yeah.

You know, I make sure that, you know, just out of courtesy and being polite that, you know, you. If anybody's talking about Fortnite or something that he's interested, oh, he's in it. Then bam. You know, he's. He's conversating like crazy. But if it's not something that they're.

Into, bro, maybe that. Maybe that shows you that he does know how to communicate. It just has to be on his terms.

That's right.

You know what I mean?

That's a good point.

And you're right, because it's true. Like, as soon as I started talking about Call of Duty with him, boy, he was. He was talking.

Yeah. So true.

But. But I see exactly what you're saying. Like, with me, with my little girl, man, it's like, a struggle right now to really know, like, what she's going through. And, you know, it's. When you're in, like, our situation, you kind of have to ask the, quote, unquote, tough questions, right? Like, hey, baby, how are you feeling? Like, you know, and then I'm about to have her for a month, and if she's being a little off, I have to ask the obvious question, like, hey, baby, do you. Do you miss Mommy?

Right.

You know what I mean? And. And I feel like normally, like, kids don't want to, like, open up about that stuff. And I know for. For my little girl, like, about a week ago, we had an experience because. So I was supposed to have her for the weekend on Mother's Day, right? And obviously, because it was Mother's Day, I didn't get her that weekend. And my little girl always looks forward to, like, the weekend. She's always like, papa, am I staying with you on Friday? Because that's when she knows that she's gonna be with me until Monday, you know what I mean? For, like, a long time. And I was like, no, baby. Like, you know, it's Mother's Day, so you're gonna be with Mommy and all that good stuff and, you know, trying to make it, like a celebration. Like, you're going to get to have fun with her. You're going to have to, you know, all that stuff. But it affected her that she didn't see me for two weekends straight, and she never said anything. But we were playing this game called Mousetrap. Have you played Mousetrap?

I haven't, but I've heard of it.

It is the absolute most difficult board game to set up. And then when they land on something, it's like this whole rig goes off. And so every time that you land on it and it goes off, you have to reset the whole thing. And it's just so inconvenient. But she loves it. And so we were playing it, and the little, like, rig wouldn't drop the ball where it was supposed to to trap me. And she was getting so mad, and she's never like that. Right. And she got to a point where she started crying. And so I just went and I held her, and I was like, baby, what's going on? And she was just like, the trap isn't working. But she wasn't saying, the trap isn't working. She was just sad because she probably felt distant because she hadn't seen me in a while. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. I was about to say there's probably more to it than what's going on with that game.

Exactly. And there was, you know, and I think, you know, some of it unfortunately plays part that, like, her mom is not encouraging us to, like, hey, call your dad. You know, and my little girl still doesn't quite know. Like, you know, sometimes I'll ask her, like, hey, baby, like, why didn't you FaceTime me? And she's like, I can't. That's all she says. I can't, I can't, I can't. You know? And I'm like, well, can you not? Because you don't know how to, because you've done it before? Or is something being said to you, like, I just don't know.

Yeah.

And I don't want to make assumptions, you know, I mean, so all I can go by is, like, her emotions in those moments. And like we were talking about on another episode, kids are very much like emotional beings, more than logical. That's why if you say, I have to go to work, they get sad. They don't understand if dad doesn't go to work, I will not eat or have a house. Like, they do not care about that. They just care about, like, they're.

They're. Their little bubble.

Yeah. And just being in that moment with them, which is honestly kind of like a huge, huge blessing because it means that you can mess up a thousand times, but if you're present the next day, you know what I mean? Like, they're going to feel that and they're going to absorb that.

Yeah. You know, speaking of assumptions, it's a good segue into this because I'll tell you a quick story. I actually even made A little video and posted it on Instagram because I was taking my son to school and I was actually talking to him about assumptions and how, you know, it's just not a good thing to do. Yeah, 99% of the time. I mean, sometimes it is, depending on the scenario or case, but for the most part, making assumptions and even worse, reacting to an assumption that you don't know is, you know what? You know what. What the reality is.

It's like when you were talking to that one chick forever ago, remember you told me that story and you were asleep or something, and she thought she made all these assumptions and so you were like, you're craz, lady.

Well, literally, I guess a quick story in the middle of this story, but I literally just. It was in the afternoon and I was dating this girl for, I don't know, it had been a couple of weeks and it was in the afternoon. I laid down and just took a power nap, man, for like an hour. And phone was on silent. I wake up and I had like 16 text messages and it was this girl having a conversation with herself, more or less like, why aren't you returning this? You're probably doing this and reacting to what I'm. She thinks I'm probably doing. And I didn't even read them all, man. I was just like, wacko Jacko, you're out. She assumed her way out of that relationship. Right out, man. But that was probably a good thing that I took that nap because it saved me some time, right? But yeah, so I'm taking my son to school and I'm talking about assumptions. And, you know, we all judge and we're all guilty of it, and it's just a matter of catching ourselves in the moment. And so I was talking to Riley and we were talking about that somebody on the radio. I don't remember what channel, but it was. What did he say? Like.

Never assume.

Never say. I can't remember what it is now. Never assume you'll be an ass for you and me or something.

Oh, you'll make. You'll make an ass out of you.

Yeah, yeah, you'll make an ass out of you and me if you assume that's what it was. So anyways, we pull up and there was a girl walking and she had like, part of her hair was dyed pink. And I made a comment like, she must like pink or nothing derogatory. But yeah. And he looks at me and he was like, dad, her mom has breast cancer. And I was like, gosh, you know, And I.

That.

That Just brings the whole. The whole point of all of everything I just said. It's like, you don't know what the hell's going on with 99.9% of the people. So when we make judgments about somebody, how they're acting or reacting. Yeah, man. You have no idea what they're dealing with. They're freaking parents could have just died or they just found out they had cancer. I mean, you just don't know.

You just don't know.

So, you know, when we get pissed off at people for the. The smallest minute, things that are just like, I catch myself and I'm like, I don't know what's going on with that person. So why am I, you know, getting. Saying what I'm saying or thinking what I'm thinking? Yeah. Who am I to be like that, you know?

Yeah.

Because when I'm in a bad mood, nobody. I'm sure people think, yeah, he's what?

He is a hole.

He is. And.

And what's cool about that moment, bro, is that in that moment, you invested into Riley. Yeah. Something priceless. You know, it's like. Like whenever my little girl was breaking down, me just hugging her and being there for her and telling her, baby, I love you. Like, if you. I literally told her. I was like, baby, if you want to cry, it's okay. Cry. You mean, like, keep crying? And I. Because most people are like, oh, stop from crying. But I was like, no, like, let it all out. Like, that's an investment that you make into your kids. Like, and as a single dad, you kind of have to be on top of your A game with investments. Like, what are you depositing into your kid? Like that. That scenario, like, it just. Riley Wilcock, the way it played out was just beautiful.

It was just perfect.

Yeah.

And it. And I guarantee that moment is something he'll remember forever, you know? You know how there's just, like. You have these, like, spotty memories of things, and you don't know why you remember them, but you just remember them. I think that will be one of those things.

Yeah.

Because I made it a point. And I'm like. And we even talked about it again after school. And that's why I decided to make a little video and share it with people, because it's just so true. Everybody needs to think about the fact that we just don't know what is going on in other people's lives. So if everyone was aware or treated people as though, I don't know what's going on. So I'm going To not say this about them that, you know, or whatever the case, this world would be so different.

Yeah. And this is probably a good place to wrap it up because I got to pick up my little girl from school. But those. Those everything that you just said, kids are watching us. And so I almost call it, like, unintentional investments, right? When. When we act out a certain way, whether it's emotionally or verbally or just in a certain mood. Because even silence is communication, right? Like, if something. They say something to you and you just ignore them, like, that's an unintentional investment, negative one that you just.

They grow up and become who they are based on things that we taught them that we don't. We're not aware that we're teaching them at the time. And that is a true fact. And that's something I think we all need to be aware of. And I think that's a great way to wrap this up and just know that it's the. It's the things that we're. We do that we're not aware of that we're teaching them.

That's how we raise our kids.

Yeah.

Oh, that's scary, man.

It is. It is, but it's true.

Yeah. Yeah, it is, man. Man, what a good. What a good, short, sweet, straight to the point episode, man. I really like this.

Yeah, I enjoyed it, man.

Yeah. Guys, remember, if. If you like the content, share it with someone that needs it. Also, like, just follow us. We love doing this. We're having a blast doing it. And we'll catch you guys on the next episode.