Will the pain ever end?

Hey, you're listening to the Single Dads podcast, a podcast for single dads by single dads. In this podcast, you're going to be encouraged and hopefully given some practical tools to be able to become the parent that you've always wanted to be and that you know you can be. Hopefully, this podcast encourages you. Make sure that you download the Single Dads podcast app to join our community. Hope you enjoy the show.

Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.

I don't care what you say, bro. I'm leaving that part in.

No, you're not, because I'm cursing. You can't leave that in, bro.

So many of our episodes are already explicit. Oh, there you go.

Oh, now it's erect. God.

Single Dad's podcast after hours. Yeah, I'll put the hand claps in there.

It's funny that the last episode when you, like, I don't know, played a bunch of, like, buttons, and you're like, I don't care. I'm leaving that in there. It wasn't in there.

Yeah, bro.

You just go, I'm leaving. Yeah, I'm leaving that in there. And there was nothing to leave.

Yeah, it's because I. I hadn't hit record yet. But all of this I got.

See, if I had that two turntables at a mic over here, I'd be playing like. Like all sorts of.

Well, we.

What do all those buttons do?

We can upload our own stuff. So, like, this one. I like this one. It's the hand clap. Look, put on your. You got to put on the headphones, man. See, that one's that Single Dad's podcast. See what I mean? And then. Yeah. For when we say something funny.

Yep. And then we have.

For when we say something not funny.

Bomb. Hey. Oh, gosh.

That sounds like a horror film. Single Dad's podcast after hours. Yeah.

So, Frank, what happened when you brought that chick up to your place after that date?

Oh, That's good, bro. Guys, welcome back to the podcast, man.

What's up?

We're obviously having some fun because we really enjoy this. We were just talking about the podcast, obviously, because that's what we do now on Mondays is we just focus about it. But we were downstairs just talking about it, and it's just. It's really weird. Like, I was going to the restroom right before we started filming, bro, and I was just thinking about, like, how cool it is that we're doing this and that we're almost. We're almost to a year of consistently doing this and showing up.

Father. I think Father's Day was our first episode.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. First episode.

Whenever that is. I think it's in June, right?

Yeah. And we don't even know when Father's Day is.

Whatever.

But. But, yeah, it's just. I'm just so. I don't know, man. I'm just so grateful in my life for, like, the things that we get to do to just help each other and help people. And I mean, you know, maybe this podcast blows up, maybe it doesn't blow up, but regardless, we're already helping people and we're already building the community. We were literally in the middle of what we once thought about, which is so cool. And it would. It just, like, hit me again. I've been doing this thing where I just keep reflecting on things that I love and that I'm, like, proud of. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

And it just, like. It hit me like a ton of bricks when I was going to the restroom, and I was just like, dang it, dude. Like, this is incredible. We've gotten to meet some incredible people, hear some very powerful stories. Our brother Tyler. Dude, that example that. That you gave last week, Scott, about what he does, like, for his kids, where he writes to him. I started doing that for my little girl that day. And that would have never happened, you know what I mean, had this never started.

And some of. I mean, some of the people that we've touched or impacted or the fact that we've had an impact on just like, hell, even a small handful of people is amazing to me. I love it. And I mean, just like you said, when we started this, it was like a. You know, who cares? We. We agreed to commit and stick to it. Even if we had 10 followers.

Yeah.

@ this point in.

Time.

Yeah. And, you know, it's cool. We got.

20. Well, no, just to. Just to let you guys know. Okay. Because you're a part of this as well. If you're tuning into this, you're a part of this. If you're in the support group, you're definitely a part of this. And you are. Yeah. You're a massive part of it. And the fact that we're going to be able to, you know, hopefully use those donations to. To just add more stuff to the podcast, to add more reach, that means that it doesn't just end with you. Like. Like, man, that's. That's what I don't think we realize sometimes, like, whenever it's. It's a ripple effect. It's a ripple effect that you're having Anybody who's listening right now, and especially if you're a donor, you're having a massive ripple effect. Even just listen. There's. There's some ads that are running on some of the podcast, so that really helps also. But. But, like, I want you to think about this. We started not even a year ago, and we have over 12,000 downloads already, which is. Which is just wild. And then you start looking into where we're reaching. We're reaching the United States, we're reaching Canada, Australia, United Kingdom, New Zealand, Sweden, Belgium, Germany. Like, we're reaching so many people. And it's all because of, you know, you who are tuning in right now, because if you weren't tuning in, we'd probably still be doing.

This. Honestly, we just would be saying what we're.

Saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We would just be saying different things. And so it's incredible that, you know, we all get to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. And I just had this idea, like, last week, and I just kind of spit it out to Scott just very briefly. But, you know, it could be something that we can ponder. And, you know, if you guys are interested in the support group, we can chat more about it. But it would be so cool. Some of the men that are in that group that have, like, specific talents, right? If we can, like, come together and, like, do something for single dads, we'll put it in the app, like, all that good stuff, but just like, activities, you know, that you could, like, for example, our brother believe it's Jay, who's a chef. It's like, imagine doing some sort of sick, cool dessert that you do, like a walk through of, you know what I'm saying? And it's like for single dads to do it with their kid on one of the. There's an activity that we can do. I know I would do it with my goose. You know, my goose is my little girl. You guys know that by now, you know what I'm.

Saying? But.

Absolutely. Just different stuff like that. And none of that would happen, bro, if. If. If this wasn't happening. And so I'm. I'm so extremely grateful for every single one of you that's listening in right now. I'm grateful for this podcast. I'm grateful for you, Scott, because without you, we would have never started this. And, you know, like, God brought us all together for a specific reason, man. And I just love that it's bigger than ourselves, you know what I'm.

Saying? Absolutely. And thank you for that. And, you know, What. It's been such a fun experience with the growth. And just to touch on what Frank was just talking about, we have some really cool plans for things that we're going to be doing moving forward. We're starting to schedule. I mean, kind of what we've been doing in the past is, you know, coming on. We, as you guys probably know, this is never scripted. We just come on and we talk about various topics, whether it's from a topic request or something that. An experience that has taken place in one of our lives or something like that. But we're going to start having guests on to cover some topics in different areas that are very broad, that everyone will be able to relate to in some form or.

Fashion.

Yeah. And some. Some really good guests. Not just, you know, random people, but we've got some really, like, I've. To be honest, some people have reached out to us, some pretty big names and that want to be guests on. And so we're going to start doing that at least once a month. And Frank was talking about different activities. So we're putting together some really cool things that will not just provide you something to listen to, but some things that you can take and kind of, I guess, put into action to make your relationship with your kids stronger and, you know, more, I guess, providing you with some good ideas for activities. Just things that you can take and, you know, prosper and grow your.

Relationships. Yeah. So it's awesome. It's just the beginning. Literally just the beginning. And so I'm excited to see where everything goes. Today we're going to talk about a subject that every. Every single single parent, especially like.

You know, every single single.

Parent. Yeah, every single single parent that's. That singly goes through single things. We all experience this. And it kind of hit me today because my mom sent me a picture. They're over there at my. At my land where I'm building my house finally. And it's just a mess. And I'm going to show you all some pictures. So if you're watching this on Spotify or on YouTube, you can. You can watch, you can see those pictures. But as. As you can see in these images, it just. It doesn't look very nice. It actually looks like a huge mess right now. And, you know, I'll show a picture of my house before, right. And then now what this is looking like. And later, once it's done, I'll show a picture of the finished product. But I started thinking about how life is so much like building a house. Okay. Especially what we're all going through. Because more than likely you did not volunteer to be a single parent right now. There is some people that have. And you know that's, that's cool too, but that's still part of rebuilding. But, but for a lot of us it was just an out of nowhere. And it feels a lot like those pictures that I just showed you. Like life is just messy. Like there is no end in sight. It's like, what the heck is this even going to be? If I told you come check my house out right now, and I took you to that, then you'd be like, this is not a house. This is a mess. This is a bunch of dirt. Concrete that's just everywhere. Right.

Right. So metaphorically speaking, Frank's current home is a pile of shit.

Dirt.

Rubbish. Rubbish. Tractors, rock. God only knows what's in that. Yeah. And so metaphorically speaking, that's kind of like our lives once we became single parents, just a pile of just rubbish that is now going to have to be rebuilt into a new life. Our new life. A new.

Season.

Yes. The beginning of a huge new season in our lives. And so when Frank's house is done in however long it's going to take. Six, nine months, I don't know, something like that. It's irrelevant really because our, our lives aren't going to be rebuilt in six, nine months, but they're going to kind of improve. Just like his house is going to be built in phases. Starts with, you know, moving all the rubbish away and creating a fresh new.

Foundation.

Yep. Starts with the foundation and then we build from.

There.

Yes. And that's kind of, you know, all the things like everything from, you know, like visitation and custody problems with your co parent difficulty juggling personal and work related responsibilities. The emotional impact of separate. That separation has divorce or.

Death.

Yeah. Or whatever the case could be, you know, struggles, stress due to financials. The list goes on and on and on. That's.

What.

Yeah. Frank goes home to right now he doesn't really go home.

To. But I just sleep in a.

Tent right outside next to all that dirt by the.

River. No, but it's true. That's what we come home.

To.

Exactly. We, we come home to all of that. And it goes hand in hand with the episode that we just released, which if you haven't listened to it, you should after this episode. And it's about the anxiety and the stress that we deal with. Right. It all stacks onto other. And what I want to encourage us is to not, not make a, a temporary Season, our permanent home. Like, I'm not going to go and set up camp where the construction site is right now for my home and be like this. This is where I'm going to live for the rest of my life. No, it's the excavation process. And after that comes the foundation, and after that, more and more and more. Right. And so it's. It's seasonal. And I know those seasons can seem like. Because right now I'm living with my parents, and good God, it feels like forever. I love my parents, by the way. You guys have heard me talk about them on here, but it feels like forever, man. And it can seem like that when we're going through these experiences. But I'm telling you, if there's one thing that you can hold on to, it's that hope and that assurance to know that this is nothing more than a season. So I am not going to make what's seasonal permanent. I will not allow myself to do that. Because we can do that. Right? Everybody says that. Oh, it just takes time. But just like building my house, let's say. Let's just say that I said I was going to build a house and that was going to take nine months, but there was no work being done. It would not take nine months. It's time with action. It's time with resources. It's time with momentum. Right. If you just stay there and you're like, things are going to get better, but you're not doing anything to progress, there's no action, then it's not going to get better over time. And there is living proof of this. Right. There's so many examples. I get. I get so many messages. And even personally, I know someone who's been stuck from a divorce for, like, seven years now. Man. Seven years. Just hurt still. Bitter still. And unable to, like, move past it. And it is because he's. He's made something that's temporary, permanent in his.

Life. That's. That's sad. And you know what? Let's talk about some things because it's sad because he's not the only person out there that's like.

That.

Yeah. And, you know, I hope that anyone that's. That's listening to us, you've at least taken a step to look for something to get you out of a rut.

Or. Well, if they're listening to this podcast, they.

Have.

Correct. Which is awesome.

Yeah. So they. They've at least done that. And that's something that. That. That we do.

Often. That's good right there, bro. Sorry, guys. I'm just getting a charge on my laptop so it doesn't.

Die. But that's something that we do often. And for example, I. I look for podcasts, books to read just last. A few days ago on Friday, Frank and I went to a. A really cool speaking event. Had Tony Robbins was headlining it. Yeah. But there were also our.

Dad. Our father, Tony.

Robinson. Yeah. Frank's man.

Crush. But besides the.

Rock. Yeah, he's all right. But whatever. There were some other really, really awesome speakers. And honestly, my. The one that I was looking forward to most was Molly Bloom. I don't know, for those of you who have seen the movie Molly's Game or read the book about Molly Bloom, I won't go into it, but I can't believe you haven't seen the movie, dude. But what an amazingly cool story this lady has. If you haven't seen that movie, I highly, highly recommend it. But anyway, there was just a lot of really cool speakers. We both signed up for something to. That we're parlaying what we did there into something even cooler. That's basically, you know, Frank's doing something that has to do with investing. I'm doing something when that has to do with kind of telling my story in a powerful, powerful.

Authentic.

Yes. You know, totally out of my comfort zone, which is why I did it. To continuously put ourselves in, I guess, situations or things that are outside of our comfort zone. That's how we grow as people. And that's kind of. My point is Frank and I are continuously doing things like that, whether it's through reading a book, whether it's through going to hear speakers, talk and motivate and offer perspective that we might not have gotten had we not.

Gone.

Yeah. So there are. If you're. If you're one of those people that are in a rut, that are better, that are in a situation where you think, God, it can't get worse. It can get worse. And it will get worse, if that's your attitude.

Because. Very.

True. It's just one of those things is like, that's one of the worst things I think somebody can tell me or tell. It just think is God, life cannot. Oh, it can't get any worse. It can. Yeah, it can get real worse. Real, real worse, real.

Quick.

Yeah. But anyway, back to what I was saying is just there are all. There's so many things you can do to constantly improve you. Your. You know, yourself and get yourself out of a rut and pivot from that negative mindset to a more positive mindset. And it just starts with you. You deciding that I want to change. I want. You know, I. I want this. If. Even if it right now, if it's just for your kids and not even for you, fine, start somewhere. But it does need to be for you. You need to change yourself for you, so it can be for your kids. And it just. Yeah. Gets better and. Gets better and gets.

Better. Exactly. And it's. I. I want to hit on this because I don't want you to think that you have to fix yourself, because.

You.

You. You. You don't.

What.

What? The process. What this whole process really is, this process of life is really awakening who you actually are deep down inside. And I. I've mentioned this before. When we go through hard, hard times, when we go through hardships, it's almost like a layer of pain gets added onto our personality and our being and our dreams, right? And we just keep adding those layers and those layers. And so when you start going through a process like this, where you're really investing into yourself, you're trying to figure out, like, man, what makes me tick, what. What triggers, what makes me passionate, what. What makes. What moves me, what makes me cry out of joy, what makes me cry out of passion, what makes me cry out of hurt, right? All these different things. What you're doing is you're awakening who you actually are, who God designed you to be on this earth so that you can live as that person fully and authentically. It's not you trying to change yourself and fix yourself. It's you revealing who you already were designed to be. But for some reason, the world is. And life came and tried to suppress that person, and that is not who you are. You are. This is why I. I started the whole, you know, 1% conquer like, apparel brand, because you're more than a conqueror. And I truly do believe that, because God spoke that over us. We are more than conquerors. And if you're right here, right now, listening to this podcast, you have a 100 survival rate of everything you've gone through, which means that you have the ability to conquer anything you go through, right? And so this season that you're in, this rebuilding season, you can see it as the end of your life, right? I could see it as, man, my old house is gone now. There's just nothing but a bunch of dirt and crap everywhere, right? And actual literal crap because of the sewage system. I'm like, or I can get excited about what's to come because change is here to stay, man. And I heard Steve Harvey say this. I've been on a Steve Harvey binge, bro. Like, that dude is wise. First of all, he's freaking funny. And then on top of that, he spits some wisdom because he's like self made. He came from absolutely nothing and he made things happen. But he was talking about how change is here to stay. Change is going to happen and we can either react to it, which if we react to it, it's a little bit late, or we can respond and we can be ahead of it, knowing that change is coming. And I'm going to initiate change in my life so that change has to catch up. I'm not catching up to change. Right, exactly. And I think that is so key in the season that you're in where you're in a rebuilding stage. Your life is you. What feels like has completely fallen apart. And that's where a lot of the pain comes from whenever we're going through this stuff, man. And you know, I'm sure, I'm sure it's. I can believe it's 10 times harder whenever, like your spouse has passed away, right? Because it's just completely different. It's not like they chose that. You see what I mean? But in the divorce process, you're struggling so much because you believe that the life that you had with that person, your new life, can't get better than that. And that's just lie. That's just a lie that we believe and it's not true. I mean, and if you believe that, then it will be that because you'll show up in a way that you'll create not that great of a life. But if you believe that this is the beginning of something new, right? That this is, I'm now gonna build a better house than I had before. Because now I have more wisdom now, I have more empathy now I have more courage, now I have more strength. And now I have these additional tools under my belt that I can build something bigger, badder than what I had before. That's when things begin to change. That's. That perspective shift can change everything. Right? Maybe before the divorce, when you were married, you weren't that attentive as a father. Or maybe you weren't giving 100% because we took it for granted. You see, I'm saying that's. That's what it was for me. That's what it was for me. For me, I knew that I was working and I'd come home, I'd spend time with my little girl, but it wasn't like it is now, man, I wasn't as intentional about how I spoke to her, what I spoke to her, what I was depositing into her spirit and as I am now. And so that to me is a bigger and better house between me and my little girl that I've gotten to build thanks to the mess, the rubbish that was first there. You see what I'm.

Saying? Yeah, absolutely. I mean, in my situation was, you know, my wife passed away and my son lost his mom. I lost my wife. And the rubbish and the mess that was.

Left.

Mm. All I could do was what I had to.

Do.

Yeah. Start over and rebuild. And you know, God only knows it's been a never ending process, but it in time has gotten better and better and better because I've chosen for that to happen. But I could not have come close to doing it by myself. Yeah, I, I, I reached out for support in every direction I possibly could. Not at first I didn't, but it, you know, it takes time and you know, you know, it's been 10 years now and you know, I, I, I've got a, a teenager who's about to get his driver's license and start driving and he's straight A student and his mom would be damn proud of him. And so there was a point in time where I literally didn't know that getting to where I am now, I mean, that wasn't even a.

Thought.

Yeah. Because I was just looking at like today and tomorrow. You know, that's how it starts out. But, you know, and again, but it's different for everyone, just like you said. And you know, with a divorce and, you know, losing someone, it's, it's, it's different. But at the same time it's the same because we're both rebuilding in just different ways.

Yeah. And we have no choice. And that's, that's the bottom line that I think it's like we need to recognize is that we have no choice. It's either we stay there or we move.

Forward. But yeah, and to what you were saying, like, or what Steve Harvey was touching on, it's being proactive. Proactive is deciding I'm going to look for some resources like the Single Dads podcast as a resource to help me in whatever situation you're in. And that's why it's important for us to not just talk about things and be vulnerable and tell our stories and hopefully help you a little bit in that, but also provide resources and provide actionables and provide things that can help you guys get through the, the Rubbish and the mess that you didn't have a choice, but that's what you're left.

With. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And if anything else, hopefully we're helping you believe hopefully we're helping you believe that, man, there is light at the end of the tunnel. You know, at the end of the day, it is your job to create that light by creating, like, an emotionally compelling future. Something, somewhere where you want to be, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. And if all we get. If all we get to do is help you believe that, man, I am going to make it through this. I'm not going to stay here. Then that's. That's all it takes. It's like that episode where I was talking about how everything is driven by our emotional state, like, where we're in. We'll respond differently to anything. If you're. If you're feeling hopeless, you're going to respond way different than if you're feeling excited about something way. And you're going to take way different actions which will yield you a way different result at the end of the day. Right? And so if. If all we do is, we get to encourage you to, like, literally, if this entire year all we've done is encourage you and put. Put that light back in you, that I can make it through this. I will make it through this. And I'm not just going to make it through it and have something mediocre. I'm going to have something incredible that I stepped in and created. You see what I'm saying? Like, that's. That's what it's all about. So I don't want you to get stuck in something temporary. Don't make it permanent, because it's not. It's not. The construction process is. Is annoying. The healing process, it's annoying, it's dirty, all of that. But I'm telling you, once. Once the. Once the hard work is done and then the framing begins to happen, it's like it. It passes by and then you're going to look back in those moments and say, man, that was quite a season. And you're going to get to look back at it as, like, I grew in this area, and I grew in this area, and I'm so proud of myself for how I handled it in this area. You see what I'm.

Saying? So I'm going to ask a question to everyone listening. How can you look back, whether it's a month ago, a week ago.

A year ago, or 10 years ago, it doesn't.

Matter. Just can you look back and say, shit. I remember when I was in that. And that mindset, that frame of mind or that situation or that scenario, and I literally did not think that I would be able to get to where you are right now. How many of you can do that? I hope most of you. And if you're in. If you're maybe fresh into this and you're not quite to a point where you've made enough progress, where you feel like you can do that, well, you're on the right track because you're already listening to a resource that can help you, but. And you got to keep plugging away and identify what it is that can help you and your situation. Just.

1%. Yeah, just.

1%. 1%. And literally just chip away, chip away, chip away. And I promise you, you will get to a point where you'll look back, whether it's a week, in a week, or a month. It's amazing how many things, especially, like, good things, can start, like, have a snowball effect when you're being proactive and putting yourself in situations, surrounding yourself with the right people and. Because when you're surrounded with positivity and you're surrounded with good people that want to help, that want to listen, that want to offer.

Support.

Yep. Then, Frank, what. What. What's gonna.

Happen? Your life is going to change for the better? Drastically. Yes. 100, man. It's that episode that we did on, I think it's titled, what Influences Single Dads. And we were talking about the environment, the community that you're in, man. It makes a massive, massive difference. Like, it really, really does. I was just hanging out with my brother and some of my cousins last night for the Mavericks game. RIP Mavs. I don't think they're gonna. I don't think they're gonna make it, man. And when this airs, they probably already got swept, unfortunately. But we were just hanging out, and I was. I was talking to, like, one of my cousins, and it just. It became so obvious to me that I was in such a different place than I was two years ago. And it was all. I could only accredit it to the people that I surrounded myself with. It was this, bro, this. This background right here. It was the Hustle crew, man. All of us at Hustle. It just elevated my thinking. It made me believe in myself, and I began to create things that I never thought I'd do. And ever. You know, I'm saying that my family sure as hell never thought that I do. You know, I mean, they're still like in disbelief. And. And it's like, I get to. I get to walk in that. Because I chose an environment, I chose a community. And you're doing the exact same thing right now, guys. Like, if you're listening to this, you're choosing to. This right here is a community. This audio that's going into your ears right now is affecting you at a deeper level, at a spiritual level. I'm telling you it is. That's why you got to be. You've got to guard those ears and guard those eyes as far as to what you let in. Is this moving the needle forward for me or is it moving it back?

Right. Like, that's, that's the, the biggest, biggest thing is you have to identify what your, your mission is, what your goals are. Short term, long term, and every single thing. What. Whether it's a person or an activity, anything that doesn't promote your. Your mission, your goals, you have to drop them and get rid of.

Them.

Yes. Period. The.

End. And that's okay. That's. It's your life. It's your life, dude. Like, there was some, some cat that. I heard who. He was talking about how he went into a restaurant and he was like, if I didn'. Like, how the server was, like, addressing me. I went to a different restaurant, man, because I wanted to experience dinner at a certain.

Capacity.

Yeah. And so I have the choice to do that. Like, man, just because it's family, if they're not moving you forward, it doesn't mean you've got to keep them around like you used to keep them around, man. I love. I love my family, and my family doesn't necessarily bring me down. I'll never say that about, like, my cousins and stuff, because I love them to death. I love hanging out with them. But there was a certain season in my life where I had to unfortunately turn my ears to somebody else, turn my attention to somebody else. And that doesn't mean that I don't love them, doesn't mean I don't hang out with them. Right. I was just with them last night. You see what I'm saying? But it's your life. It is your life. What you tolerate, you're inviting more of in, and you have the power to choose what I'm going to tolerate and what I'm not going to tolerate. When you go out on a date now, as a recent single dad, if you do not like the vibe that's coming off in that date, like, I'm. That will make you feel real powerful. Like, I've Done that before, where you're like, hey, you know what? I appreciate this, but I'm gonna go. I really appreciate this. I don't see a second date happening. So I want to respect your time. I want to respect my time. Like, don't worry, I'll cover the drinks, I'll cover the food. You.

See? Yeah.

100%. Because it's what I want. It's what I, what I want to experience. Right. And always ask yourself, is this challenging me or is this helping me grow? Because challenge and growth might not feel the way you want it to. It might not feel nice in the moment. So don't just run away from tough situations, obviously. But we all know when it. Yeah, but we all know when it's like, this is actually growing me or this is, this is a waste of my time and it's not making me better. We, we got that intuition, man. God made us smart. Yeah, we, we know what's serving us and what's.

Not. That's the whole thing. Just be proactive. Identify. First and foremost, you have to have a mission, you have to have goals, and then you have to understand what. Identify what steps I need to do or take to achieve, Accomplish these.

Goals.

Yeah. And your child or children are, in fact, involved. Very much so. So, you know, you're not just doing it for you, you're doing it for your family. So there are so many things that you can change to make sure you're moving in the right direction and you're not on a treadmill. And in order to get off a treadmill, AKA going nowhere real fast, you eliminate the things that are keeping you from making forward.

Progress. Exactly, exactly. And sometimes that's Netflix, man. Sometimes it starts there. I, I, I did a whole, a whole video on, you know, helping encouragement to, like, be post divorce depression. Oh, yeah, Sorry, guys. By the way, man, we're trying to figure out this camera because it keeps stopping, and so then you can't enjoy the full video experience. But we're going to get that figured out for y' all soon. But I did this whole episode and I was talking about how when I was going through my depression, I was watching YouTube a lot, man, like fish tank videos and just entertaining videos. And the number one of the changes that I made in my life, it was so small. Literally 1% change. That's where everything's been birthed from. All I did was I didn't stop watching YouTube. I just changed what I was watching on YouTube. That was it. I started listening to sermons, I started listening to Tony Robbins. I started listening to encouraging messages. You see what I'm saying? I just made that, that one change. And then that started a complete momentum shift in my life that took me somewhere else. Had I just kept self loathing and doing that, I was still self loathing, but I had different words coming in through my ears and hitting my heart and my spirit. And it was just from one little change. I mean, so again, whoa. You know, just to end everything off, don't stay in a temporary place. Don't make it permanent, because it's not permanent. And I know it feels like it right now, but feelings are very deceiving. Very, very deceiving. You genuinely don't even have to have a real thought in your head to feel something. That's why whenever you dream that you're falling, it feels like you're falling, but you're not falling. It's just a feeling. That's it, brother. You got.

Anything? I just want to make sure that everyone, if they take anything at all away from this, just make sure that you take away. It's up to you. You have to be proactive, not reactive. And you write your own.

Story. That's so.

Good. So thanks again, guys for tuning in. Look forward to our next support group. If you haven't joined us yet, please do. You'll get a lot out of it. Everyone does. And we'll see you then or talk to you on our next.