Currency - Module 4

Sam. Hello, gorgeous. Human beings of the currency course. Oh, my gosh. Who is on live today? Hello. Sarah. Amy's here. Inara, Nicole, Monique, Rita. Hi, Rita. Hi. Maria. Valerie in the house. Michaela in the house. Hello. Hello. Sophie, Ann is here. Paula, Andrea, Claire, Ruth, Ali. I haven't seen you live in a while. So good to see you. Juliet is here. Oh, my goodness. Anna, Sarah, Lee, Jennifer, Paola, Mira. Attend. I'm so happy. I'm now seeing familiar faces, which makes me very happy. Anna is here. Caroline, Caroline, Gaston. Hello. Bonjour. Let's see. Michelle is here. Hello. Lindsay. Everybody's moving now because new people are getting added on, but Nadia. Hello. Yali, Chloe, Kat. Hello. Chelsea, Aline, Valerie, Michelle, Nadine. Hello. Hello. Carla. Hi. Camille, Sophie. Hi. Kathy, Lotte. Hi. Oh, my gosh, I'm so happy to see your face. Hi, Jamie. Isabel J. Is on. Is there, but not there. Hello. Rosa in the house. Lisa, Kelly. Hello. Oh, my gosh, this is so fun. Tanya is here. Jasmine, Sonia, Lindsay. Hi. Ali, Jess, Sophie. Hi. Amber, Olga, Heidi, Arielle, Jennifer on camera. Oh, my gosh, there's so many of you on camera, lying. Hello. Hello. Oh, my gosh. Najin. Hello. Heidi, Zoe, Dr. Zoe, Isabel, Nama, Jillian, Linda, Amy, Sarah. Hello. Hello. If I've missed any of you. Hello. Hi. Cheryl, Laura, Chris. Ah, everybody's popping on. G. Regina. Hi. So good to see your faces. So I really want to anchor in with you here. I want to tell you something. I'm very excited, nervous about today. This is like one of those modules that is like, we're gonna see how much I nailed this program based on how you respond to this module. This is like, this is the big deal. So I want to set some context. I really feel like this program from now on will feel like a prerequisite for me for any conversation, any deep or big conversation that I ever have. Because what I think I've managed to do with you, based on the comments, based on your breakthroughs, what I think I've really managed to help you do is detangle the pedestal in money. Like, all of a sudden, you just realized how worthy, how valuable you are in every single area. And money just becomes this really fun thing you get to work at if it's one of your values in life, and if it isn't one of your values in life, it doesn't matter. You're not less valuable as a person for not valuing money at all. So you may have actually gone through this program just to realize you're least you're less interested in money than you thought you were. And that's fine. You may have gone through this program feeling more sure that you're ready to make money than you ever have because you've untangled it all. And that's fine. You may have, you may finish this program and feel like I'm probably going to be like the wealthiest version of me that I could have ever been because I don't think I ever would have gotten to these realizations in time to make an impact on my business. I'm so grateful I'm here. Like there's different ways that you might be feeling and they're all perfect. That's the other big part of this conversation. I stand for money in the hands of women, but I stand really, when I look at who I'm standing for, when I'm speaking about money, I'm standing for the women who have, have not had money given to them easily. The ones who have to handle all the stuff that comes with like am I valuable enough? Do I, is it okay? Am I a bad person? The guilt, the shame, the weird feelings like all of that, that's a very self made problem. When you're born into money and you don't question it, you don't question it. When you, when you're taught to question it, it's hard to stop questioning it. And I, I really feel like most people give up on us. It's just one of those things where it's like you're probably never going to make it. And so let's just keep selling you a 9 to 5 and a 401k dream and let's just give you the best, you've best chance you've got. And what's difficult for me as I stand for this is I am very well aware that even though I stand for this, some people love the idea of it, but won't do the inner work and they won't do the actual work. And they will, they will not get it. And that's a scary thing because it puts me in a position where it looks like I'm preaching about money, which is the last thing that I'm doing. This is the most realistic, truthful conversation I can possibly have with people. But if someone wants to see me as a villain, that's just preaching money to people who will never be capable. That's their belief in people, not mine. When I believe that we are all capable, these conversations come easily to me because I went from not being able to do any of this like sleeping in the front seat of my car with no access to any funds. And I didn't have anybody in my family that could have helped me or billed me out at that time. Like there's nothing that I could have done except change. And then I did. And because I believe that if I can do it, anyone can do it, and because I've seen that happen over and over again, people that do not have the right hand dealt that society says you need in order to be rich, become financially free over and over and over again. I can't ignore that. I believe in this. I just can't. So I'm going to speak this truth out very loudly and it's going to cost me a lot. It already has. It costs me for all the people who don't believe, who don't get it, or who think that I'm speaking gibberish. But the fact is, if you really pay attention to what I'm telling you and you go with the logical aspect of what we're talking about here, it's undeniable, it's irrefutable, and it's just that no one cares enough to enlighten us because they think we're not capable. Which insults me beyond belief. I think the biggest transformation I've ever had in my business and how I've really helped this industry forward is the understanding that if you're capable of believing in people instead of just thinking you need to use people to make ends meet, you can actually have not only a business that's profitable, but a business that changes the way the world works. In my journey as a. As an entrepreneur, especially as an online coach, I've taken a lot of online programs. And the biggest thing that has irked me in the way that people talk is it really does. It feels like the running conversation is people are stupid, people are stupid, so you've got to keep it simple. People are stupid, so you've got to charge a price like this. People are stupid, so you've got to go through this exact funnel. You got to market this way, you've got to talk this way, you've got to do this like people are stupid. And when I listen to that, I feel so sad because it does not help us change the fact that we're uneducated on certain topics. It just helps make money on it. There's no changing that in the way that this is done. And so my invitation to you is to really notice what's out there. And when you're feeling like you're. You're stupid, it's possibly just you just read someone's marketing that made you feel that way, and it was written with that in mind. So don't. Don't just think because you feel stupid. You are. There's a difference between feeling something and being something. And we're going to move into a little bit more of that when we're talking about value as well. Like, there's a difference between feeling valuable and being valuable. You are so valuable, but you might not always feel it. If you think about the people in your life that you value, do you always nail showing them they're valuable? Are you always excellent at them knowing that, or do you miss the mark sometimes? Do the people that you care about and value the most sometimes tell you, I feel like you don't care about me, or I feel like you don't have time for me, or I feel like we don't have the capacity to show people how much we value them. And because of that, we've got to build intrinsic value. We've got to believe that we're more valuable than anyone will ever be able to show us, because no one will ever be able to truly show us how much we matter to them. And how much we matter to them is just a fraction of how much we matter, period. So if we're looking for people to give us a full picture of who we are, we're going to run our entire lives. Who's the one that's supposed to make us feel valuable? Who gets that job? I know for a fact when I felt responsible for making other people feel valuable, I didn't have time for myself, first of all, and I overgave. So people felt valuable. But at the moment, I wasn't available. I didn't have time, or I messed it up. The punishment was extraordinary. It was like, you don't care about me anymore because I have a blueprint for how you treat me when you care about me. And now you're acting not like that, which means you don't care about me anymore. It felt like everything was so fragile. Everything was so sensitive. There was no room for. For trust. There was no room for space. There was no room for distance. There was no room for. For anything. If I wasn't constantly proving that I valued a person, it was a question of time before. Everything I had done before was a lie or didn't count. And what was really real was this. This moment where I didn't have time. Or maybe I was going through something of my own. This is why we've got to be so strong because no one will make us feel the value we are. No one will even make us feel the value they feel for us. So this intrinsic value is so important that you walk into every room knowing you're valuable, because then you can just trust that you are. And people feel so safe walking with people who already know they matter. I don't need to tell you what I need to show you. I will every time I think of it, but I don't have to, you know, it. That is such a safe feeling to have. So this conversation today is important. It feels like the. It feels like this whole program is the landing for all the rest of my work. I felt this program was so important because the biggest issue, I feel that we get past a certain point of success is that people don't understand it because they haven't lived it. So being misunderstood is like the top thing that happens past a certain level of success. And when I'm working with my clients and a close proximity, in my masterminds, in my private coaching, 90% of the work we do is value. Work and identity work of them struggling with someone who said something, someone who lied about something, someone who experienced them in a way that doesn't feel like it. Accurately, like is them people misunderstanding their words, someone nitpicking what they did or what they said. When you get to a certain level because people haven't been there yet, it's very hard to understand it. The number one thing you will feel is misunderstood. And if for you, people understanding you is a big value of yours, you'll start to feel not valuable anymore because you're not relatable, you're not understood. So this work is constantly important all the time. And it's important for me to bring this forward also because I know that a lot of the things that I put out there are not easy to understand. And I know that sometimes when people don't understand things, they experience themselves as less valuable. If you say something to me and I don't understand it, I would far prefer think that you're ridiculous than think that I'm not capable of understanding what you said. And so it becomes increasingly that people. It increases how many times people want to say that what I'm saying makes no sense or want to just take it out of context and make it mean something different. Why I think this is such an important prerequisite is because I want to be very bold about all the other things I want to teach you. But if you question my motives, if you question your value, my value if you question why I talk about money, if you question why I ask you to be so strong, if you question why I ask you to take full responsibility for yourself, it's going to be really hard to hold all the big conversations because fundamentally the big question mark and the part that's always going to keep you stuck is this conversation. I can talk to you about social media, but if in the back of your head you've got this like, but does it really matter? Do we need to be popular on social media in order to have value? But you've hired me to learn how to learn social media, so I don't want to have to bring this concept, this context into every program I, I offer. You know, if we're talking about exponential wealth, but is it really important that we become multimillionaires? Is it really that if we're not doing this, that we're not valuable? No, of course not. I just don't want have to bring this conversation into everything. If we're not good at leadership, if it's hard for us, if people aren't listening, is it because we're not valuable? No, of course not. But that's, I don't want to have to bring this conversation into everything I'm bringing forward. This becomes start here and then whatever else you want to learn, I'm going to kick you in the butt lovingly. Because there. It's very rare that people achieve the things that I'm achieving right now. And I realize that especially in the way that I'm doing it. I didn't get here by paying all this money and like paid advertising and getting people to come with like hooks and really like well thought out hooks with sales funnels. And I didn't actually do that. I got here only through modeling what I'm teaching you and speaking to people and people coming in like organic social media, organic money, organic relationships, organic everything. What I love about this, it doesn't mean I won't in the future. I just don't know how to do it yet. I focus too much on this. But this has built a $70 million coaching business in six years that is like, it makes no sense when I say, when I say that, but it's, it happens because I believe in what I'm telling you and there's nothing I'm leaving unturned. Everything I'm talking to you about everything, it's, it's in there, it's locked in there. And I'm unique, I'm rare, and I'm limited edition. I Have yet to find another person that does what I do in the way that I. That I do it. It is very rare. It may not be the right fit for you. That's perfect. But it doesn't change my value. And it's the same thing for you. If you say, like, not everybody has to love what I'm doing or what I'm saying with the people who click with me and see the value in what I'm doing. Sky isn't even the limit. The sky isn't even the limit. So in this currency program, the next part we're going to go into now is like, how do you. How do you start to make money? But the reason this is so important and why it had to come to the end before this even mattered is because it has to not be the only thing that matters. If you need the money to show you that you're valuable, if you ever have money problems, all the work you've done will feel like it doesn't matter at all if you make it. That being successful is the only way that you're valuable. On the days where it's hard and people don't buy, it'll feel like you're worthless. And I see people struggle with this every day. And I'm telling you, it's not even worth the money. If you're going to have that kind of experience with the money, I'd rather you live off land and eat little berries and exchange things with your neighbor who's got milk and your neighbor who has wool and your neighbor who has wood. And you live on a farm, just exchanging things. Things. Rather than live an entire life feeling not valuable because of a paper currency someone else decided was the middleman for things. But if you want to make a lot, you get to have a lot. But not because you're more worthy than those who have less. Not because you're more valuable than those who have less. Just because you got it how this all works, that if it's attached to your value, unless you feel like the most valuable person on earth is just never going to work. But if you understand that you are valuable and you bring value to the marketplace, and there's no limit to the amount of value you can bring to the marketplace and that it will never touch your personal value, and the sky isn't even the limit. And that's the angle we want to be playing in right now. So let me just see this little message that just came in. Okay. Okay. So the first thing I'm going to have you do before we even enter this module, I'm going to have you take a moment and either visualize for yourself or write, if you have a pen and paper, an oath, a promise to yourself that making money will be something that you do in this lifetime, that you enjoy, that puzzles you, that mesmerizes you, that. That, that is an art, that is, that is a passion, but it will not define your value. Like, I need to know that you're there before I can tell you the rest. I need to know that. So I'm going to give you a moment and I want you to write it down. I'm going to give you like 2 minutes to write yourself, I promise. Even if you just need to write I promise over and over and over again and know what it means. I'm going to give you a moment to just feel this before we go into the next piece. So just in silence, take two minutes and write your promise. So now that we're clear, here's the big discussion. How money really works is that you bring something to the world that people want and the currency that has been universally accepted to pay you for that thing, to receive that thing is money. If we were to relate, take away money, we could exchange things. We could. The thing is, it's difficult to put on every discussion an emotional discussion of like, what is this worth to me? And what is this worth to you? It's difficult to have those conversations. And we had, we had that discussion about the cucumbers and the apples, right? If I have this pristine apple and you have this cut the dirty bits off cucumber that doesn't feel like a match, not because your cucumber is not valuable, but because you haven't put the same amount of care as I have. And I don't want to make you feel bad and I don't want to devalue you as a person, but you haven't put as much work into this as I have. You haven't put as much care into this as I have. And so having a conversation about value all the time makes it difficult for people to create anything else. It makes it difficult if you always have to think about what things are worth, to think about anything else. You'll notice when times are the toughest, that's when you think the most about money. How much is it worth? Should I really spend this much? How much is it exactly? Oof. I don't think I can do that. That's when you think about it the most, is when times are tight, when there is an abundance of Money. You don't think about money the same way. It just becomes, I desire this. The money is there. Just have it. Like if you had an abundance of carrots and everyone just wanted to exchange everything for carrots, you'd be like, yes, here, have a carrot, have a carrot, have a carrot. It's because we have so much attachment to money as it is that we're afraid that we won't get more, that we're afraid we don't know where it's going to come from. But the fact is, money is everywhere. Everyone has some. Everyone has some money. And you don't need money from everyone in order to succeed. And you don't need a lot of money from everyone in order to succeed. You'll be surprised in order to make $100,000 a year. If you had a thousand people that paid $100 for something, that'd be it. And we don't think about it so logically. That's like, if I built my impact and my influence where I had 100,000 people watching me, all I would need is 100 people to pay me $1,000 or thousand people to pay me $100. And I've got a six figure a year business. We're always wondering, what do I need to do and what do I need to say? And how do I. How do I get someone to say, yes, but that's different than how do I bring the most value to the world? And so I want to bring this in different contexts because I want to show you, not just through your business, how more money comes in. And I want to make it kind of succinct. So if we go with the most unlikely thing, someone leaves you an inheritance, it does happen, that it happens by miracle and that you never knew the person. That does happen. But a lot of the times people will leave money to the person who is the most valuable to them in their lives. Who cared about me the most, who made me feel like I mattered the most, who took care of me, who was there for me? That's the person who receives the inheritance. The idea is not to live your life caring for people so they leave you an inheritance. But if you live by the principles of these programs, you understand how you will already be an energetic match for that. When you look at things like a job, who gets the promotion? It's the person who's the most valuable in that position that gets the promotion. Now, if you see that as intrinsic value, I'm not valuable enough. I didn't get the job. That would not be correct. It's not who's the most valuable person. It's who's the most valuable person for the job, which means who's the most knowledgeable, the most impactful, the one with the best leadership, the one who's the most well spoken, the one who can move people the best, the one who shows up on time and who knows what they're doing, the one that's got the most confidence. All skills that it's completely in your power to build. And so as a person, we become more valuable to others or to businesses based on our willingness to evolve as people. That does not. That's not our value as a human, but it's our worth as a position in a position in a company. And so when you're in your head, like, I don't feel like doing those things, where the struggle is, is there's someone who does. There's someone who'll do whatever it takes to get that job. And when they get it, it's because they would do whatever it took to get the job. Because they valued the job. They valued the job, they valued the income, they valued the position so much that they might do things that they didn't really want to do or that were difficult for them or that they needed to learn in order to get the position. When we get victimized by people's choices, I chose this person because I feel they're a better fit for the job. When we feel victimized by that or we lose a huge opportunity, which is the opportunity to recognize that if we wanted to be more valuable to this particular company, we know exactly what to do and it's at our fingertips to do that. It's our choice to be more or less valuable to a company. It's. If we don't want to do that, we get to build our own companies. And a lot of us here are entrepreneurs for that very reason. I don't want to learn things that are valuable to you. I want to get paid for the things that are valuable to me. And that is a very entrepreneur mindset to do because for a lot of people, they will say, tell me what to learn. Whatever I need to learn, I'll learn it. If it means you're going to pay me more, it's valuable for me to learn the skills you find valuable in order to be paid more. That's valuable to me. For entrepreneurs, a lot of the time, it's like, I will not learn something I find not valuable just for more money. I don't enjoy it. It's not valuable to me. But as an entrepreneur there are things that you really find valuable. And what I would like you to tell me in the comment section right now is what are the things in your company that you really value? That, that your skills, that you know you need these skills in order to be a very great business owner and you actually value learning them and you maybe you even know you're not yet at the peak of where you need to be, but you're excited about that. Personal mastery, Emotional intelligence Critical thinking Communication, Branding Communicating Sales integrity Communicating public speaking Esthetics, Empathy Creative Communicating Intuition Kindness Sales recce, Respect Branding Conscious communication mental and emotional health all the things results for clients Brain functioning Emotional intelligence Variety Fun Finding my voice, my nervous system being regulated Coaching skills. So we're starting to see like these are the things that are extremely valuable to you as a business owner and they're actually also very valuable to your clients. All these things, if you had them and you can, you can reverse this for yourself. If you think about it, where do you love to work with people? Who would you like to work with? You'll be like, the person is kind, emotional, intelligent, has charisma, has great marketing, sales, advertising, gorgeous, you know, aesthetics, they care, they're enthusiastic about their work. They're, they're kind, they're compassionate, they're balanced. That's a person that feels way more fun to be in business with and in a job. And this is the thing that's like mind boggling in a job. If you were all these things, you would be the greatest asset to the company because it's very rare that a person shows up at a job with that kind of energy, enthusiasm or skill set. I can tell you I am the luck. I feel like the luckiest woman on earth with the, the humans that I've brought into my world, especially my core team and some of the new members that have joined. Like it blows my mind how willing they are to develop new skills. That's the most amazing thing. What makes them the most valuable in my world is like whatever it is, they're going to figure it out, they're going to learn it, they're in, they're adaptable. If they don't know how to do it, they're going to find out like that is so valuable and it's rare that someone will do that in someone else's company. Usually people who have that amount of self ability to lead themselves end up starting their own business. But that doesn't mean they're going to enjoy having their own business because there's a lot of skills that make them feel like they should have their own business. And then when they have their own business, they realize all the things they don't want to do, like lead generation, being responsible for the finances of the business coming in. There's a lot of pressure. And so you may be. You may find over the time of your career that you are an amazing entrepreneur, that you do very well at your own business, or you might find that what you're actually supposed to be is a piece of genius in someone else's business. And that's not a bad thing, and it's not a failure. A lot of people just aren't in the right job or they need to go out into the world, learn entrepreneurial skill sets to go back into a job and dominate the industry. That happens. And I've seen a lot of my clients do that. They've come into my world, they've learned. They thought they wanted to be an entrepreneur because being under someone else's thumb made them feel like they couldn't grow. It made them feel pressured to learn things they didn't want to learn. They went out on their own, went to see what they valued, became extraordinarily valuable, realized they didn't want to have their own business, then went back to the marketplace and got the best jobs you could ever possibly imagine. Because they understand the currency and the value of who they can be as a person, which they weren't going to do for someone else. They weren't going to learn to do that for someone else. But once they found out that's who they were, then they could be that for whoever. And that's a very powerful distinction. Now, when you're doing this for your own business, you're always going to find new skills that matter to you. It will not happen that you will eventually know everything and that you will not need any more support. And the reason for this is because what you're going through is going to change. You're going to need to handle things that you can't imagine will happen right now, even stuff like pr. There's always going to be something else to learn. But that's why in a lot of businesses, company growth is deductible. Continued education, it's deductible in business. When you go and you continue to learn, they. They prefer that businesses continue to do that because times are changing and because good business is good for the world. So it's so important that we continue to learn along the way. And it not feel like it makes us less valuable, but the opposite is true, that it makes us feel more valuable. So at any point in time, you can be valuable to make some money. You can be worthy of making some money. I'll give you an example. You take a small child, you give them a lemonade stand with a bunch of lemons, sugar and water, and they will be able to sell lemonade because they're an energetic match to the price of the lemonade, because they're an energetic match to knowing what wanting lemonade feels like, because they're an energetic match to knowing what going by a booth and there's something for sale and I really want it and nothing else matters. They believe in that there's an energetic match to the whole system for a small child. But if you tried to make a small child sell insurance, that might not work so well. They're not an energetic match of the price point or the knowledge or the clientele or anything. When you think of spending $5 to ask the kids, the neighbor's kid, if they will mow your Lawn, if they're 10 years old and they. They were looking for money, they might say yes to that. Except the neighbor himself, who's a lawyer, probably won't take the $5 because it's not valuable to them, because it doesn't make sense. There's nothing right or wrong or good or bad about this. And it gets to change. You can charge $5 when you're 10 and then find a job when you're 12 where you make minimum wage and then have a job when you're 14, when you get minimum wage plus tips, and then get a job when you're 17, when you're managing stuff, and then by the time you're 18, realize that you know how to start a company, do something and start making money from that, and then get a job because you've done all of that. And then, and then, and then it's. The possibilities are endless. Our issue is we're always seeing it like, if I am where I am, I can't change it or it's going to be hard. And that's the belief that keeps us stuck where other people that don't struggle with money do not have this thought. You look at billionaires who went bankrupt and rebuilt with more money. They built more money than when they went bankrupt, because for them, the situation they're in does not mean anything. It's the skills that they have, it's the abilities that they have. It's the fact that they. You can't take away me, take away all my money, I'll go build something else, take away who I am, I'll just go build. Then I, then I don't know what to do but take away what I have and I'll just rebuild it. And that's why currency is so important, because we are the irreplaceable thing. It's our currency as a person. That's the irreplaceable thing. I can, I could take away, someone could take away alpha femme from me and say, okay, you can't do alpha femme anymore. And I would just be Melanie Ann Layer still, you can't take away Melanie Ann Layer from me. You can take away Alpha femme but you can't take away Melanie Ann Layer. And this is what I want for you is like you're so valuable and the more skills you have, the more valuable you are and the more confident, strong, capable, well spoken, strong mindset, leadership skills, capacity to sell, market, advertise. You don't feel guilty about talking about money or asking for money. You know you're always going to be worthy of more. The more skills you have, the more money you can ask for. For always, always. You're an unstoppable person. And when people are having to decide where they spend their money, there's two ways they spend it. They spend it out of pity. Like I really should help you. Like, and pity might not be the right word but it's the right frequency. I really want to help, I want to support you. Might not be the best, but I really think it would be good if I gave it to you. Or they will go for self serving reasons, which is what's the best for me. So they'll go for what's the best for you or they'll go for what's the best for me. It's a win win when you can say that what's the best for you and what's the best for me is the same thing for me, for you, for us. That feeling that people have when there's this like, you know what I think I want to buy from you, that feeling, it can be a little bit like pity. It can be on the lower end spectrum, it can be like, you know what, this person's really struggling, they do a good job, let me just support them. But ultimately what creates that and what makes people do that is a connection for the person. Which means even if they're not the right choice for the job, if they're the right person, they'll still be chosen somehow. And I see this over and over and over and over again. And what's cool about that is you can become the best when people believe in you enough times and you get enough time and space to practice. But what we want to create is that people choose us because, number one, they connect with us. And they say, if I'm going to choose anybody, I want it to be you. Not through the pity energy, but through the. Like, I'd rather it be you than anybody else. And on top of it, why would it be anybody else? You're the best. If you can do that, if you can bridge those two gaps, there's no more limitation. Now what we tend to do is put all of our focus on the first one. If I'm good enough, if you care about me, haven't I given you enough? I've tried so hard. I've given you all the things. I've shown up, I've given value. I'm giving so much value to my audience. I'm writing the best messages. I'm going live on Facebook. I did this masterclass. I even was in my DMs. I helped this person, and then they went and bought from someone else. We put all our eggs in the basket, thinking, if we're kind enough and we're good enough, people will choose us. But that only counts the people who are willing to do something that's like, I won't necessarily go for the best for me, I'll go for what makes me feel the kindest, the nicest. I'll go for something that's like, I'll choose you because it's what's right, but not necessarily what's right for me. We don't want to have one or the other. We really want to create both and to create both. This is where for me, for you, for us, comes in. It's like, this is the best choice for you. I will make sure I nail this. I am dedicated that my skills will be the greatest skills. I'm constantly learning, I'm constantly building myself. It's at the forefront of my being that I'm the greatest at this. And it'll mean the world to me if you choose me. That connection, that combination, there's nothing like it. Because what a lot of people do is they become so good. They say, I'm so good, I don't care. Choose me or don't choose me. I don't care. And that has a lifespan. When you don't value the people that come into your world, there's a lifespan. You could be successful for a moment. But there comes a time where you burn through all your relationships and nobody cares to be there anymore. And that is difficult. We've got to learn to hold the value for what we have while we're building more with money. And that's tough because we do get pulled. I would rather have more now and not think about these things. But then you burn through your money or you burn through your success very fast. And there's a lot of people who do that. I've been doing this now for 10 years, six years in the online space. And the amount of people who come in all guns blazing and disappear within a year or two, I can't even tell you how many times that happens. They're just, they just burn out from burning people out. They just burn through people. There's no actual connection or value. Everything's about money. It doesn't work. So the ideal here is to build a business model. And especially for the way the world is now. I'm not saying that in the past, in the past things were different. But today, the way people value business is they feel valued, they feel valued and they're getting the best result they possibly can. So if you are very honest with yourself, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much have you really valued your clients and your business? The ones that you've had, regardless of how much they've paid? Like if you've said, I'm undercharging or these are all lower end clients, or if you've done that, take that into consideration. How much have you really? If I were to plug you into a value vibration machine and say, how much do you value your clients and I plug you into that machine, what will you vibrate at? So I'm getting eight. A lot. Okay, eight or nine. Some say three to ten. Like it depends. What's the, what's the bit that's missing? If you didn't say 10, what's the part that's missing where you're like, if I really valued them, then I would. I'm going to give you a few minutes. I want you to actually think about this. And you might notice. This is interesting. If you have people that you meet in real life, you value them more. If they're on the Internet, you value them less. You might find if they pay in full, you value them more. If they pay in installments, you value them less. You might find if they're hiring you and they're vocal about how much they love you and they're constantly sharing about you, you a lot, you value them a lot. But if they buy from you and they don't ever say anything, you value them less. You might see if they hire you and only you, you value them a lot. But if you see that they've hired you and a bunch of other people for a similar service, you value them less. You might find that if they hire you and they are successful, you value them a lot. And if they hire you and they're least successful, if things aren't working for them, you value them less. You might find that if they are, if they seem like they're not really haven't found their own voice yet and they look like they're trying to do something similar than you, you don't value them much. Whereas if they're doing something completely different, you value them more. Just look a little bit at this. I'm going to give you like five minutes to just sit and think about this for yourself. What's the missing part and where does the value drop for you? Just contemplate that for five minutes. Okay, that was about five minutes. I had the time to do mine. I'm guessing you probably had the time to do yours. If you didn't have time to complete. This is something that you can also continue on your own time. So let me see what's going on in the chat. When there's lack of engagement, it makes me question my value. I completely understand that I value people who value my work. I love that the value drops when they don't take as much action on their insights, when they're not willing to invest in themselves, when they don't see that what's possible for themselves. Wow. Why would I judge this? When they immediately think a higher ticket program is just not for them. When they don't want to go as deep into trauma healing as I did. When they're less open minded about what's possible, possible outside of the norm, when their energy and their motivation keeps dropping and momentum keeps falling flat. Wow. I feel awful judging all this. Please forgive me friends. Thank you for being so honest and I think a lot of people can resonate with this. This question's profound. For me it's not about the money paid up front etc, it's about how they're willing to to connect at a deeper level and the work over cycles of time. Otherwise I'd value them at 10, not 8. So it's like if they have the capacity to operate in full transparency and be all in, then you see them higher value. But sometimes that's what they came to you for, to learn how to do that. I put responsibility on them for my worthiness and esteem. But I need to hold that and know that unconditionally and not allow for that to be determined by who buys and how often and how much. Maybe it's when they're used to my work or. Or me, as though I'm needing to do the work and they think they know more. They try to take a role of being the teacher. Oof. I wonder what happened. I realized there's a lot of noise on how I've learned to work with clients, how to do sessions, while that's totally not who I am and how I want to work and somehow money is blurring all of that. And that needs to be more than five minutes to contemplate. Perfect. And if you've. If you've unblocked that, there may be more time to contemplate. This is good. Contemplate this tonight. Absolutely. My low sense of personal power gives me the clients who are an energetic match. The value drops when my clients hire me to save them or just to ease their their conscience. Feeling like I value them as humans, but as clients. The gap comes when I feel like they're more attached to being stuck in their victim story than growing. When they don't get it or don't show up or don't do the work, sometimes I feel like it's not worth my time. So good. Thank you for that. Putting too much value in others and not enough on myself. I value my clients if they shine, expand, and are grateful when they're with me. If I feel respected, if I feel an extension with them, if I feel I have space to help them and impact them, I value them. If I see they value me and my work, I value the ones less. If they need to contact, I need to contact them for payments, I think when they don't show up and then they want the results when the next one going. Where is the next one going to come from? I totally resonate when they have a victim mindset and want me to comfort and they don't want to change. When I judge them for feeling limited, when they're skeptical and don't believe what I can do, I don't know how to value them. My value is high unless they're not truly present. My value has been nothing since two years ago. When I put offers out and no one bought, I just quit and my value fell to zero. I was so focused on my worthiness, so I was disconnected with the class. What Can I have to offer in my class? I feel as though I'm not doing enough. And then what's missing? They often prioritize a quick fix over investing the time required when I have a hard time building a relationship with them. I think I get tired because I like one to one delivery like me in a company or one person via a bunch of people. Because my energy goes away when I run out of things to offer them. I believe I'm no longer valuable to them, so I avoid them. My value drops when my clients, paid or unpaid, when they're untruthful to me and to themselves. My value is really linked to whether my or to whether they validate me or my perceived value as a brand or a brand new chicken nugget. The value is less when they're not committed in showing their commitment through their actions. To many clients. Too many clients rock my nervous system. I can't handle it. Many clients rock my nervous system when they don't do their own inner work. Very interesting exercise when someone says they can't do the work because what they need hang on. They couldn't work with me because what they need was a witch to take away spells for not having clients. When they don't value myself. Exactly where I don't value my clients or where I don't value myself is exactly where I don't value my clients. The value drops when I realize they don't want transformation. But for someone to listen and validate the victim mindset. Okay, so what we're starting to see, and this is like full circle moment. Value sees value. It is very hard for me to value a person that's not valuing me like how. And I have had a difficult year in that for myself and why this is why it took me so long to build this program and it's why I know this program is so important, is because I watch myself have so much fun and enjoy working and enjoy doing all the things to literally wanting to leave something that has brought me, my family and so many clients so much value because I started feeling not valued by people. And this is everywhere. This is everywhere. What happens is when you dehumanize a person, you don't value them as much. And there is a certain level of success. And you may find that you've done this in your life where you've devalued a person. And I think the first time we ever do that is with our parents like you. You dehumanize your parents because it's like they're. They're just supposed to know everything. There's no value in how difficult it is for them to figure it out. At first, it's just like, you need to nail this for me because you're my parent and this is my life and you're messing it up. For me, that's like, one of the first things. But for me, I felt dehumanized a lot. And that made it hard for me to value certain. Certain things. Like, even my free alpha femme group, I wanted to shut it down because I started paying attention to how many people utilize that group that don't even. I've never met them. They've never taken a free masterclass. They don't interact with my social media content. They just go into that free group and they try to market themselves. They need their posts to be. They. They get their posts refused. Then they get mad that their posts are refused. They're constantly trying to sell. They're constantly being performative in that group. And it's like there'. There has never been people saying, I'm so proud of myself. I just hit this huge milestone. They've never invested in alpha femme courses. Like, why are they using that group? I started feeling really upset about that. Like, I don't feel valued as a person. You're using me. I wanted to shut the group down when I had clients hire me just so that they could use my name. Last client, tell me, this is why I hired you, so I could plaster your name everywhere, because I knew it would give me business. And I said, I don't know that I'll ever be able to take on private clients now unless I've gone through such a journey with them. Because I. How do you. How do you devalue a person so fast? Say, I don't care about you. I don't care about what you're going to teach me. I don't care about anything. I cared about getting my name attached to yours so that I could get things. So that's. That's value for her, but that's not value for me. I don't feel valued in that. I understand that you got a lot of value from that. I did not get a lot of value from that. So it made me question a lot of things, like, what's value? What's valuable? When people say, you know, I'm so grateful that I'm in this space because I've made all these, all these clients. Like, I've. I've. I joined a program and I made more just by the sales that I got. I didn't really watch the programs, but just the community paid for itself. I don't feel valued in that. I think it should be added value that the community is there and that there's possibility for community, you know, collaborations and, and clients and things like that. But I've seen clients depart from my world and their goodbye post is all about how many clients they made from my network, from being in my network with little to no thank you for the whole year we spent together. That made me not want to do certain parts of my business anymore. And that's with the success being there. This isn't even like on the way. While it's hard and the money isn't even coming yet and it feels difficult. All the things that you might have along the way, though, that sucks enough as it is. But to then get there and for those things to happen, it's just like, what's the point? So if you don't super value yourself, this stuff gets into your head massively. It got into my head massively. It made me need to take a step back and, and go back and say, let me take the next year building new stuff for me. Let me, let me heal all this for myself and build the content that I'll be able to give out. So, like, right now I've come back with a strength that I'd been lacking for a while. But what's amazing is that all the things that I've been working on in the past year that I haven't given because I've been working on myself, that's all coming out now. So I'm so excited for this next chapter of my life because there's like a year, a year's worth, like nine months worth of work that hasn't been seen by the public that's now coming out. This is, this is the first program of the next level iteration of my energy, my focus, my connection, myself. And I think, needless to say, this is. Sometimes it's worth the space. Can you value that? Sometimes it's better for you to focus on your own business than everybody else's and come out with a masterpiece. When you're ready to show yourself again, I can tell you it is worth it. Sometimes you've got to take the space, the time. You don't launch as much usually. I did a masterclass every month since 2020. This year we did two all year because I was focusing on rewriting everything I was doing so I could come back with a bang. This was a bang. I'm not messing about. But I'm really, I've really learned valuable lessons from the pain and the disappointment that I felt in people. I've learned a lot from that. Things that I can see now that I didn't see then, with hindsight, with space. And so when we're constantly on the hamster wheel of needing right now everything to be given to us immediately, I need everything to be fixed for me right now. I need to make money right now. We have no hindsight, we have no space. We're not looking at things from an outside view. Our power is locked. We're not seeing, we're just feeling panic. And then we feel not valuable. It's like a ping pong match. Every time the ball is dropped, I feel like I'm not enough. Instead of zooming out and knowing this is a game I choose to play, my value is not attached to, to how often I hit this ping pong ball. I need to zoom out. Sometimes we're so close to our problem, it feels like every time I drop the ball, my value is questioned. Instead of zooming out, this is a game I choose to play. This is not attached, this is not attacking my value. So why I share this is because there's something very big I contemplated about currency and money and what makes it really magical, masterful, meaningful, and something that we can do for a long term. And what that is, is before, during, and after someone pays you. That's. This is the game, this is the money. This is the, this is the look, this is the way. This is, this is the strategy. This is the thing. Money comes before, during, and after. So before someone pays you, there's things they need to feel. They need to trust in you as a person, that you're not just going to run away with their money. They need to trust in your business model and that you've actually built something that you believe in. They need to trust that they are going to be able to access support if something isn't working for them and that things are mildly adaptable for them if they need them to be. They need to, they need to be able to see firsthand what you stand for, who you are, what you believe in, what the product is. There's like, there's a. There's a before. And what we call the before in, in words, which, the words don't matter. The energetics do is marketing, advertising and sales and referrals. That's what someone needs to see before testimonials, marketing, everything. That's like, show me what this is before I buy it, that's, that's what people need before the sale. Now what makes it difficult is that this is where we have the most issues. Before anyone's even used your product or bought your service. So you're feeling not valuable enough when they haven't even tried the thing yet. And this has been a big, a big thing for me. I have people who will literally go and go look for the worst. Like, let me just go find who, who didn't enjoy working with Melanie. Let me just go find who doesn't like it. And they'll find stuff for sure because no one's ever fully satisfied by what anybody does in this life. But they'll say, okay, let me find out who didn't like this stuff. And they'll base their decision on who didn't like it. I can't do anything about that. There's absolutely nothing I can do about that. There's people who are going to go and say, let me go find the best case scenario and let me go find the hero stories of Melanie. The millionaires, the multi millionaires, the ten figure earners. Like, let me go figure that out, let me go do that. And then I'm going to go from that and that's when I'm going to hire Melanie. I also can't do anything about that unless I entirely silence talking about those things which I did when I was, when I was confronted. And I realize it makes no sense because I'm speaking to intelligent people who are capable of knowing that all the bad things that are said about me aren't true and all the perfect things that are said about me, everything needs to be taken with a grain of salt and it's to be your experience. So what I realize is that the only place I really actually want people to learn from me and where I value a person choosing me is if they've watched my content and decided to come because everything they've seen aligns with them, that will be my best client. Not because they heard someone made a million and not because they heard someone heard I was, you know, some sort of witch. Like it doesn't matter on what side of the spectrum, what really matters. I'm one of your best clients. Yes. What I love is people who are like, let me look at this person, let me feel the vibes of this person, let me see what they're about, let me find what I agree with, what I don't agree with, what draws me and what doesn't, and then they make a full educated decision on whether or not they want to invest with me. That's my ideal client. What do I need to do in order to create that? I need to understand marketing, advertising. I need to be able to be strong enough and not embarrassed to not or to fear that people are going to find the bad stuff. And I also need to not rely on all the good stuff. I need to create enough value that it doesn't just speak for itself and end up being what people say. It also needs to be what I say. So I've got to learn the skills of marketing, advertising and sales. If I don't learn how to do those things, it doesn't actually matter how good I am and how valuable I am, because nobody will know unless I have a really great word of mouth, which is how I started my business, which is also an amazing skill to know how to offer that and how to navigate that. So what's important to remember is that it doesn't even need to be you. That's an amazing marketer, advertiser, you could hire all this out. Our issue is, at first, we don't really have the resources right away to do that. It costs less to learn ourselves than it does to hire someone else. In the beginning. And eventually I found that every skill I knew for myself made me able to hire better people because I knew if they knew what they were talking about. All the places I ever hired a wrong person is because I didn't know how to do the job I was trying to hire someone for. And so I didn't know they didn't know either. Because I didn't know what to look for. If someone knew what it took, I would have known if I knew how to do it, I would have asked a few questions. They would have said, and I would have been like, you don't know what you're talking about. But because I didn't know what I was talking about, all they needed to do is say one or two things that made me go, oh, you look like you know what you're talking about, before I realized they did not know what they were talking about. So it's actually been super valuable for me that every single skill that is required to run my business, I know how to do it. And then when it's time for me to scale, I scale by hiring someone that I can tell knows because I know. And when I have a conversation with them, they get what I'm saying. So I have learned marketing, advertising and sales. I've learned these things not because if I'm not good enough, I'm not good enough. I've learned these things because I want to make money and I think it matters to be a business that knows how to market, advertise and sell. Now, a lot of people are going to say it's manipulative to learn to market. No, it's not. Not if you have a good business. And this is where the second part comes into play. If you have a terrible business model, you do not value your clients. You know that. You're just trying to get people to pay you, but you focus all your attention on being a great marketer so that people buy. That's crap. But you know that is. And that's not who you are. So we don't need to worry about that. If you're going to focus on how to sell, how to be an extraordinary salesperson, this is the thing. You're going to learn how to be a great salesperson. But what you've got to offer is terrible. That's when it's bad. But selling an amazing service and learning how to sell it, that's a good thing. Marketing an amazing service and knowing how to market it, that's a good thing. So the second part of it, if you feel at all like marketing, advertising and selling is grubby, grody, or gross, there's a part of you that's not sure that what your deliverable is is good enough. And this is so important. So now there's another set of skills, which is what people experience while they're working with you. And that is the service you provided, the product that you offer, the customer service. What's the experience of being your client? So when you think about how much do you value your clients, this impacts massively. Because what we're saying, what we're seeing, a lot of people answer here is if they're not really willing to do the work, you value them less. It's normal. Because your entire work is about putting time and effort into helping people say yes to a thing. Before you even started to work, before you've even started to get paid for what you're doing, they have to say yes. And for a lot of us, we spend so much time giving to people who then don't move that it feels infuriating. And then it's hard to value because, like, how did you waste all of this time of mine if you knew you weren't going to do it? Or how can you. How can you tell me that you can't do it when I've just told you my story and what it took for me to do it. Of course you can do it. That's the whole point. Like it does get infuriating. But this is where your marketing, your sales and your advertising are going to struggle. They're going to the advertising. Marketing is going to struggle. If you have a thought in your mind that people probably won't do this. If you have a thought in your mind that people don't don't care about this, we tend to focus on the one thing that doesn't work. So you'll. The one person who says I can't afford it will make you question your pricing. The one person who says that you know you're. You have not the right education for this will make you second guess whether you're good enough and whether you can be confident in your marketing. We've got to be so clear of our value so that we can advertise, market and sell with confidence because those things are the only way people can actually experience our product and our service. You can feel so valuable in what you're doing and feel super not comfortable in sales. Advertising, marketing. You've got to believe marketing is valuable. Advertising is valuable. Selling is valuable. Learning to market is valuable. Learning to sell is valuable. Learning to advertise is marketing is valuable. This is a valuable skill. I want to learn how to do this. I love this. This is good for me. This is good for me and it's good for my clients. This helps clients get to know me. This is good for me. You've got to build the value around advertising, sales and marketing. So I'm going to ask you not we're not going to take as much time with this one because I think you're going to be. It's going to be easy for you to know. But if you have felt any kind of odd feeling in your body around the concepts of marketing, sales or advertising either because you think it's too hard, you don't know how to do it. You wish it didn't matter. Most people who do it well are salesy. If you've got a story of any kind that's not good, raise your hand or say me if you've ever had any kind of story. Okay, this is our biggest problem. If we can't value our thing enough to feel squeaky clean about marketing, selling and advertising it. This is the number one reason money isn't coming to us. Because the first sequence in money is the before the money. There has to be a before the money. And if your energetics before the money are all wonky, there can't be a. During the money. So advertising, sales and marketing is the energetics of before the money. So one of your homeworks before our. Our course tomorrow, Our class tomorrow. Or is it tomorrow? The day after? The day after Wednesday. What I want you to really look at for yourself is what would it look like if you valued selling as a currency, Being a great salesperson, knowing how to sell, even if you don't feel great at it. Now, that shouldn't devalue the skill. What if you valued the skill of selling? What if you valued the skill of marketing? What if you valued the skill of advertising and you valued yourself as a person that can learn any skill? Would that change your relationship to it? And how would it change it? Contemplate that. Okay, now the next part. Once someone has come in, and if you're lucky and you've done really well in this middle part, you can override the first part to a certain extent. And this is what I did in the beginning. This means referrals, people doing word of mouth, people telling other people about you. This is a very valid model, but it only works when the middle part works. The middle part is your deliverables. So do you have great service? Do you offer a great product? Do you offer a great service? So if you're super honest with yourself in your understanding of your abilities, the quality of the product or the work that you are currently offering right now in comparison to what you know in your soul you're capable of, one day, where are you on a scale of 1 to 10? And don't worry about the group looking at your number. They're too worried about their own number. They don't care. Where are we at? 3, 5, 7, 4, 7, 8, 3, 6, 7. So when you feel this, and this is where this is so interesting, when you feel this now, it actually means you're even further back than you thought because of evolution and growth over a lifetime. In a year from now, when you realize what felt like a three for you now, you'll be like, oh, my gosh, I knew nothing. What am I talking about? Like, I remember starting thinking I was doing my best. And I look back in hindsight and I'm like, I was just, I was just starting. So it's always enough and it's never enough. What I mean by that is there will always be more. You know, you can be and that more will become more as you. As you become better. So it's always growing when you have a feeling inside, like, I could be delivering better. Can you Contemplate, what are the skills you know would help you bring that up to a higher number. If you said I know my product is good or I know my service is good, but if I really ask myself in comparison to like the top, I know it could be what would help me so communication, design, choreography or lesson Design choreography. Communication. More practice. Better language, studying, discipline, better launching. So that better launching is more the. The before. Hang on, just go down a bit. More practice. Better language, studying, discipline, confidence. I deliver at 10, I feel my transmissions. But the making of that comes after the class is done. Okay, I totally get that. Okay, so launching. More practice. Design workbooks, sales pages, emails. Belief in myself, marketing. So all the stuff that's marketing is before, during is what? Mind shift techniques. Belief in myself. Calling people out on their bs. More being better at my English, my presence, more practice. So what we're seeing here is there are things that you know that you could be doing that would make your business better. But those things take energy, they take effort, and they take all kinds of stuff. So you're not less valuable as of a person if you don't feel like learning these skills or if you don't invest in these skills. You're not less of a person, but you're definitely not the better choice. Can you just matter of fact accept that without it making you a bad, terrible person and without it making you feel like. Like you're awful? Okay. In order for me to get here where I am, there is not one thing that I felt I should be better at that I didn't become better at. And that continues to be true. That's why I have this company that defies all the odds. It doesn't have what people say it should have. It just has the truth. I don't have any bells or whistles. I'm not. I haven't been featured on Forbes, I haven't been featured in, in, you know, Business Insider and this and this. I don't have the whole, you know, thing of places. I don't have the perfect website where they're. Everything is there in one place. I don't have, I don't have a best selling book. I don't even have a high school education. Like, I don't have the things everyone said, if you don't have this, it's not going to work. But what I do have is everything I knew inside I needed. You have things inside you know you need. Those are the things you've got to get more. Equip that. And it's not Even a question at this point. Because if you want people to value enough to take their money that they work all day, every day and they say, let me, let me spend this with you, it's because they've got to know that this is going to be valuable to them. And it's already hard enough for them to overcome. Whether they think they're capable, that's the first hurdle for them. Then they've got to decide whether you're the right one to put the money. So that happens in two ways. Number one, you genuinely care about them. I've asked you to look at how much you value your clients. The higher that goes, the better in the better place we are. And second of that, second of all is your actual delivery. The before, the during, and then the after. Now this is a conversation I've had with a lot of my high paying clients, the ones that are in my close proximity, because I'm able to speak with them one on one and really discover this in depth. But one of the patterns I found is for a lot of people, when someone stops being a client, they stop valuing them. So if you are very honest, have you ever had the feeling that if someone decides not to move forward with you anymore, if they decide they're complete in that moment, they no longer have value for you? It's even hard for you to look at them, it's hard for you to like them even. It's like the minute they leave, it's as if they've gone, they've left. If you've ever felt that in your business, raise your hand. Okay, this is the other part we need to work on, and this is emotional intelligence, leadership, working on any of our wounds and traumas that make us feel this way. Because one of the biggest bank of clientele that matters the most are the ones who left and came back. I can't tell you how often people come into my world. They stay for a year, then they go and they come back, they say, my world, they have two years, they love it, then they go. But then they still talk about me later and new people find me from that. Your relationships after also are important. So what are the skills you would need to strengthen in order for you to actually feel happy and feel like there's still a potential future even when a client is complete. Now, what are the skills you would have to work on? Emotional resiliency, healing of any kind of pain you've experienced in the past, Abandonment stuff, Any kind of guilt or shame of what it's going to look like from the outside world, trust that new people are coming. All these things. Because have you ever been. And I'm going to ask you the opposite. Have you ever been a client that when you left a certain thing, whatever it is, they really cut you out? Like, they would not. They would. They would be rude to you, or they would make you feel like you. You're dead to them. Like, you left. You matter. Zero. Have you ever felt that? What are the chances you would ever return to that business or organization after having felt that way? Zero. What are the chances you would ever refer to someone, go there. It's great. Zero. Because it. It discredits the entire journey. Now, having said that, this is important. People also have their own stories. People have their own stories. And so if the only reason I feel valued to you is because you message me all the time and we talk every day, or I can ask you about my things and you. You respond to me. And then one day I stopped paying you, and you can't do that anymore. And I decide that means I'm not valuable. That's a me problem. There's a difference between I can't support you the way I used to when you were a paying client versus I'm done with you. And, you know, the difference in your body with a client. You know, the difference between, like, I love you and I wish I could continue to have the same relationship as we have, but I just can't anymore. But I'm rooting for you, and I hope I see you in the. On the Internet and I stay connected and I'm so happy. Versus, like, okay, if I never see you again, that would be better for me, you know, the difference in your body and your clients feel that in their body. And so we want to learn both. We want to learn how to strengthen our emotional state so that people don't really genuinely hurt us when they leave. And we want to be able to attract people who don't need constant validation from us in order to feel valued. Those are two things we need to work on at once. So when you look at all the skills that are required to be extremely successful, it's a lot. If sometimes when you hear this, you feel a little overwhelmed, like, oh, my God, it's so much. Raise your hand if it feels like that sometimes. Like, it feels like a lot. I know, but I want to remind you of something. When you go to bed at night, when you wake up in the morning, when you focus on your dreams, who are you comparing yourself to in your dreams? Are you Comparing yourself to the people that are free and have big businesses that are working for them with raving fan clienteles and social media presences that work? Or are you comparing yourself to like the 70% of the world, almost 80% of the world, who gets zero engagement on their social media struggles in business, doesn't have enough money to pay for their desired lifestyle or to give their kids the lives that they want? Who are you actually comparing yourself to when you're saying, I should be able to do this? You're comparing yourself to the best in the whole freaking world. You're comparing yourself to unicorn people. You're comparing yourself to people who've done what most people will never do. I speak to people and I talk to them like this is the truth. Most people won't do what I do. Not because they're not capable, just because it's overwhelming. That's all it is, overwhelming. It's tough, it's hard. That's why so little people do it. You're comparing your big dreams to the people that have achieved their biggest dreams and you feel smaller than them. But how often do you compare yourself to all the people who die with their dreams because they're not brave enough to go? Very rarely. So you always feel smaller and not good enough because you're not looking at a full picture. These skills are overwhelming, but you're gonna get to learn them all. And as you learn them all, they stop feeling so overwhelming. If I took a brand new baby in this world and I sat in front of this baby and I said, okay, listen to me, small little limpy thing, here's what you need to learn within the next like five years or else you're fired. Okay, here's what you need to learn. First of all, you need to be able to keep your neck straight because this is not working for me. And that mushy part on the top of your head, I would like it to please grow hard because it's, it's odd that you're still undercooked in areas like that does not work for me. I need you to strengthen your spine. Learn to sit up straight, stand up. Actually walking would be great. Actually running would be great. Your legs are short and I'm going to need you to move rather quickly at times. Also, you're kind of short, so if you could grow about 10 times your height, that'd be fantastic. And I don't understand what you're talking about when you speak like that. So if you could learn one language or maybe two, that would be Fantastic. And if you could learn how to do that without screaming or crying, that would also be great. I would like you to increase your pain tolerance. And also all the foods you've never tried, I would like you to figure out how to like them all. I would also like you to learn time and patience. And I would also like you to start learning things by heart, like, you know, countries and movie titles and songs that I will expect for you to know by heart. We'll start with nursery rhymes, but eventually, if you don't know the songs I used to know when I was a kid, I'll think you're not educated. Okay, so all of this by the time, like, five, ten years, like, let's. Okay. What do you think this child would do? Where did I come from? Let me crawl back in. I don't. I. I did not say yes to this. This is not. This is not. Oh, also, wait, come back, come back, come back. I'm also going to need you to be able to write and. And spell and also read. So, you know, if you could start at this, that would be great. And if you could have some sort of art skill, that would be great. Like, learn to color. Or if not, sports. So watch all these sports. Tell me which one you want. But it'd be good if you were interested in one of those. This is an overwhelming thing for anybody. But we don't look at life when we come into this world. Like, everything we've got to learn, we come in like we're learning. Every year, we'll learn more. Every day, we'll learn more. We're not capable right now when we're newborn, to do the things we'll be able to do when we're five. And when we're five, we're not able to do the things we're going to be able to do when we're 10. And when we're 10 and we're not able to do the things we're gonna do when we're 15, that's life. So wherever you are right now, I'm telling you, in five years from now, you are a different person if you just choose to learn these skills as they show up for you. But you will make money all along the way just because, you know, you're committed to learning. The currency of Always Learning is actually one of the most valued currencies on the planet. I care more about the person who is constantly learning than the one who thinks they've learned everything. I feel more interested in hiring the person who's constantly bettering their product than the person who says they have the best product. We want constant evolution. So if you can see yourself today as valuable as a person, aware of the places in your business that you need to learn, or in your. In your position at work that you need to learn, and you see yourself as always learning, you have actually skyrocketed your currency as a person during this course. And the way you speak to people changes because instead of feeling like I'm just beginning or I'm not good enough, you see yourself like, I'm an entrepreneur. My skills are highly valuable, and I'm constantly learning more. Here's what I have available right now. And this is the value I provide for my clients, the people who value this kind of transformation. And this is the price that I'm putting towards it. It's so simple. We complicate it with our own mix of the value and all the mess. So if you would like to make more money in your life, you've got to constantly become more valuable in your skill sets. But you will never become less valuable. You were born valuable. Nothing will change that. There's just more value you can add, and the more valuable you are to a person, the more money they spend. But that never touches who you are as a person or your value as a person ever. Never, ever, ever. Never, ever, never, never, never. But it does as a business. It does as a business. You can look at another business and say this. What is the business valuation like? What is it valued at? This is literally how we decide what a company is, is worth. As a business valuation, what is the value of this company? That will be determined by the skills, the people that you attract, the possible, the possible sales, the sales that are already happening, the payment plans, but you build that. So the biggest mistake that we make when it comes to money is that we decide that where we are now is where we're going to be. In the same way, if a small child that comes into the world says, I'll never be able to walk and talk like those big people. Look how small I am. No, you grow to that. I'll never be able to make sounds the way they sound. Look at my sounds. No, you grow into that. I'll never be able to run like those big people. You grow into that. It's so crazy that we don't realize that we're meant to grow into every single thing we care about, but we grow into every single thing we care about. If you go to a person and you say, I would like to offer you this Service, I would like to offer you this service. And they say this service isn't valuable to me. There's no amount of more or less money that you can charge that will make it valuable to them. You've got to speak to the people who already value the service you provide. That's the first step. And you got to figure out how to talk to them. Then you got to figure out how to make it that when you're talking to them, they understand what you're saying and it feels like they're getting their needs met in what you're saying. Then when they buy it, they've got to feel like they made a right move. Then you've got to deliver what you said you were going to do. Then you've got to give them a reason to share your work and talk about it to other people. And then you've got to make sure that when your time with them is over, they have a good feeling about it. That's your job. Next to that, you've got to work on your own value as a person so that in the marketplace you're the kind of client that knows what they want, that's attracted to what they want, that buys what they want, that they find valuable, that utilizes the services that they buy, that's actually willing to give valuable feedback or referrals or whatever it is. And that even if you leave, you know you'll probably come back. If we do that, we change the economy. Because it's just as important that we're that kind of client than that we wish for that kind of client. Because if not, I look at something I want, but I don't buy it. I look at something I need, but all I can think about is the fact that I don't know it yet. I try it, but I don't really commit myself. I buy it, but I don't use it. Then it doesn't work for me, so I never say anything about it. And I don't help the company that I bought from go forward at all. And then after that I leave. I feel like I'm not good enough and I never buy from them again. That is the usual, most typical experience of a client because of their own value, because of how they perceive their own value. So when we're talking about high value clients, we're talking about people who value themselves so much that they understand the value and what it takes to build a company like yours. They value themselves and they value you. They value their money so that when they spend on something, they value what they bought, they utilize it. And they're your best testimonials because they value their time and their money and they wouldn't buy something they didn't use. They're willing to say that it was good and then if they're done with you, they come back. Or if they understand the value of what they bought, they buy again. That is the economy of a good business model. But we've got to create it, being the clients and the businesses that do that. That's how we change the economy. So if you ever feel like you are not being chosen enough, the question is just where is the value that I can provide? Falling through the cracks. Is it falling through the cracks in my communication of it? Am I struggling to be. To just say it what it is? Am I struggling to say it? Is it falling through the cracks just because no one is watching? I need to have more people watching me. Is it falling through the cracks because once I have the people, I panic and I don't, I don't produce the, the service I thought I was going to produce? Or does it fall through the cracks because every time I work with a person, I then burn the bridge at the end and there's never a return. They don't come back for more or they never leave and come back and they don't send referrals. Where is it falling apart in your. In your plan? Where are things falling apart in your plan? Because it's always one of those, the before, the during, or the after, or it's a combination or it's all of them depending on where we are. And it's okay if that's the case because we're learning. But what we've got to know, and this is like the laws of the freaking universe, is that time doesn't actually matter as an adult. When you're a little kid, there are certain things that aren't done forming and still you'll see a two year old playing the piano. Like how do you know how to do that? There's defying time happens all the time. You've got to believe that your timeline is special, unique and different. If When I was 25 years old, my entire life went down the drain and I ended up sleeping in the front seat of my car and I had been in a relationship for almost 10 years at that point with a person that should have left after three months. And so I knew we were not com. Compatible. But you know when there's just enough good to make you believe and the first three months were great. Because, you know, oxytocin, for those of you who've been in my world for a while. So the first three months are so good. I tried to recreate the first three months for like a decade. And so when I actually broke up with this person, my whole life felt like it was falling apart. And I remember telling myself all my. All my friends were having kids. Like the people I knew were having kids at my age. It was like I was really messing. I had messed things up for my life and it was not going to go back to normal. Like, it was Gonna take me 10 years. This is what I was telling myself. It's gonna take me 10 years before I can fall in love like this again. Seven years was the number actually. Seven years before I'll fall in love like this again. That's how long we've been together. And then I went bankrupt. And in Canada, it's seven years, the bankruptcy. Seven years, no credit. So I'm thinking, seven years I'll have no credit. Seven years, I'll make no money. Seven years, I'll not be in love. I projected all this time. It felt like the biggest mess that I was walking into. And in the end, in the time it took for me to be pardoned for my bankruptcy as a multi millionaire, I was lending on my own. Like, time doesn't matter. I fell in love with Kevin within a year, and it was the greatest thing that could have ever happened to me. I loved him harder, faster than I ever loved anybody there. It doesn't work on time. So I know after you've listened to this, you're like, how long does it take? How long will it take? That depends on your focus, on your dedication, on your value. If you decide that you're old and it's too late, it's going to be harder. If you believe you're too young and. And you're not ready, it's going to take you longer. If you believe everything is right on time, you're here for a reason. I'm here for a reason. This course had the potential of changing your life. You're in it right now. This is the energy, this is the vibe. It is your time. It is. There is no other reason that you would be here while I'm here, because I swear I came very close to just leaving all this and giving it up and just going to. For companies, going business to business, because that's how I started. And I got really great opportunities to do that. And I was like, I just don't know that I can Handle the frustration when I've got such a beautiful life. Like, why I would do. Why would I keep putting myself in this? I decided to come back stronger than ever. And you're here. Why is that? And why do I have these stories that resonate so much with you? It's like this is. This is the work. You've got to believe before you see you have to. There's no other way to do it. You've got to value your life like you've got one. If we're lucky, we get 100 years. That's it. What are we doing with this year, and then what are we doing with next year, and then what are we doing with the year after that? There's a skill we need to acquire, we acquire it. There's a thing we need to learn, we learn it. There are things we're struggling at. Stop. We. We learn. So we stop struggling. Let's go. Let's go, let's go. It doesn't matter who did what before us. It doesn't matter what we did before us. It doesn't matter what story we have, what generation, no story we have. It doesn't matter. What matters is we're the one. We're the one today, right now. And it's. It's now it's like, this is your move. What's your move? And if you notice in your life where you devalue people and you notice, you behave the exact same way. Of course you have issues valuing yourself. You're getting the clues everywhere. How do you respect yourself? Is the same way you want to respect other people, act the same way. Be brave. Trust yourself. Know that you're here for a reason. This is the biggest module of the program, but it's not the one with the biggest breakthroughs. It's the one with the biggest moving opportunity. You've got to look at yourself and you've got to make peace with the fact that this is going to be harder than you want it to be, but it's going to be worth more than you want it to be. You've got to stop comparing yourself to the people who are doing the best in the world, saying it's not normal, that it's not easy for you. People don't just do this. You are rare, you are unique. You are limited edition. They are rare, they are unique, they are limited edition. And everyone else you're not comparing yourself to because that you know how to do you know how to live the way everybody else is living. That's not a problem. On the day where you're good at this, it won't be hard for you anymore, that I can promise you. You just have to get to that day. It won't be hard forever, but it will be hard now until you know. The same way it was hard when you started walking and you fell on your diaper the first time. The same way it was hard when you tried to say words and there's, you know, pictures of you on home camera trying to say caterpillar. And it's still funny today. It's going to be hard. The same way was hard to tie your shoelaces. The same way it was hard to eat broccoli when it smelled like farts and there was nothing in the world that could make you motivated to eat it. Even when someone said it was a tree, it was hard until it wasn't. And that's what's going to happen here. It's gonna suck at times, but the. The freedom that you want, the currency of what you're going for, if it's not worth it, then you might as well go live a life of a joy, of abundance, in love, of abundance, in beauty, in abundance, of health. Just let go of needing to have this thing unless you care about it enough to become good at it. Because I'll tell you this, the thing that works the least with the world is people who aren't good at what they do, that are successful at it. That's our biggest problem. So if you don't want to get good at what you do, but you want to get rich, you could be part of the problem we have on this planet, which is inadequate. People who are just good at selling or good at marketing, but that don't provide a good service. That's actually what's worse with the world. So let's get better so that the people who are good at something get seen because they're willing to do the marketing, and the people who are good at marketing develop something good to sell so that people don't get all caught up in marketing and not get a good product. And then let's make sure that it's a safe place to buy from different places without feeling like if. If we don't buy, we're not good enough or we're going to lose our relationships. Like, let it be a marketplace. Let us create a marketplace where we can come in and go and. And buy from wherever we want. And that that's a good thing, that there's an abundance of business that you don't ever feel like you're being abandoned by clients that go, but that you create so much value that most of the time your clients don't want to go, let's create this. But it's not. It's not easy until the day it is. So your work right now is to really look at your. Before selling, before the money, during the money, after the money. On a scale of 1 to 10, where are you? What are the actual skills you need to learn? And then you've got to make a decision on whether or not you're willing to do that. You'll waste most of your life just putting money or success on a pedestal if you're not willing to do these things. Things, it's better for you to cut it out now and say, I'm out. Or to say, I want to do a smaller version of this. And if the money comes, it'll be fun and you'll do it on your own time. But if it really matters, and it matters now, that's the decision you need to make. Is the decision I made is the decision. All the clients that I have that made big results in their life made. It's the decision. And everything falls into place after that decision. You are not valued. Listen, if this decision is hard, if you're like, do I even want to do this? You don't have less value. If you decide, I don't want to do this, you don't have less value. It's just, you will make less money. And that is just one currency. So get yourself clear. Tomorrow's Q and A. I'm. We're going to go in for the. For really answering you like to help you do this, because I know you can. It's the thing. I have no fear for you. I wish you could see the girl that I was when I started this. Sleeping in my car. I wish you could see me. I wish I could see me sometimes. Like, life was a freaking mess. There was nothing like who I am now. I didn't have any of the things I have now. None of it. Q A's on Wednesday, not tomorrow. Q and A's on Wednesday. Wednesday, Wednesday, Wednesday. I had nothing like what I have now. I built all of this with my belief in myself, my value for my life, and my value for you guys and how much this matters to all of us. We can do anything at any point. We can turn anything around at any point. We can have it all. We can do it all as long as we're willing to be the one. So do the introspective work if you do this call and you don't do the work, 50% maximum value you'll get from this program. This is the biggest thing you need to look at if you want this program to land for you. This is the biggest thing to look at. I highly suggest you make it on live. I'm going to be calling people up to talk to people tomorrow, so ask your question on the Q and A thread, join the Zoom if you can instead of the Facebook. So there's an opportunity if I call your name that you're there. On our first call, when I called someone else, someone up, the person wasn't there. Someone else had to take their place. So what you're doing for your homework is you're looking at before the money, during the money and after the money. If you have a job and you want to see this, this means before you get hired, when you get hired, after you leave or you get fired, what's your what are the skills that you need? You need to be better at show at your correct your cv like your, I don't know how you say this in English, your resume. You need to be better at your resume. Do you need to be better at your confidence when you walk into a room? You need to learn skills on how to get an interview. Then your the job, the position you're asking for. And then after not completely breaking down to the ground, if you ever get made redundant or if you get fired or if you don't like the company you're working for, then you have no job. Then you lose all your value. Before the money, during the money, after the money. On a scale of 1 to 10, where's your power? On a scale of 1 to 10, where's your power? And if it's not a 10, everything between where you are and where you're not, what is missing? You know the answers to these questions. Take the time, then ask your questions on the deepening thread. It's going to be a big one on Wednesday and our celebration calls to be out of this world. So thank you for being here. Thank you for your time. Let's go do this. I love you. You're beautiful. You smell nice. And I will see you on Wednesday.