The Buyer 2023 - Module 5

Hello, gorgeous human beings of the buyer. We have got one heck of a module today. Let's see who's on here with us live. Anna is here.

Beth, I'm so happy to see you. See you.

Priscilla. Lara. Rita. Hello. Allison. Linda. So good to see you. Michael is here. Sarah is in the house. Buddy, Hello. Hello. Lindsay, so good to see you. Natari. Hello. Hello. Kristen, this is awesome. Thank you for being here on camera. Michelle, so good to see you. Those of you that are with us but not on camera, so good to see you. Also, I see Maya and Buddy are here, which I love so much. Mary's here. Jocelyn's here. Jen. Hello. Hello.

Hello.

Okay, so I am going to get started on this module because this one is like we're getting closer and closer to why some businesses really nail this and why others don't. And it requires a lot of responsibility. So for those of you who are planning on being in the responsibility conversation, we're gonna, we're gonna have a whole part on that discussion. But for the time being, the thing I want to really look at with you is what, why is it that some companies really nail this and some really have a hard time with this price point thing? And so when we look at the buyer, one thing that I think is so easy to miss is that buyers have a lot of respect for their money and for themselves. And usually by the time a person has the money to spend, either they wait, whose birthday is it? Whose birthday is it? Linda, it's your birthday. Oh, my goodness. 56. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Happy birthday to you.

And many more.

Happy birthday. This is fun. Love birthdays. Okay, so by the time people have the money to spend, they value their money most of the time. So it is true that there are some very rich people in the world that don't care about their money. Yes, that's true. There are people who just throw their money left and right and don't care. Yes, that's true. But that is like the top 1% of the world. The kind of people who make so much money that they don't even care about it. That's a very small percentage of the planet for most people. When they have the money to buy something that's a few thousand dollars or a few hundred thousand dollars, they value that money because they've worked for it or they've created something of value and they have a. They care about their reputation, they care about their clients, they care about their investments like they care about their money. So When a person cares about their money, they care about where they spend it, and if they care more about themselves than you care about them, there's a mismatch. And this is something we don't always contemplate on our journey. When we're building the buyer paradigm, we're like, we just want rich people with money because it makes the sale easier. Well, not necessarily. It doesn't make the sale easier unless people feel super aligned and super valued to spend their money with you. There's a. There is an energetic thing, and this is one of the things I've been talking about mainstream on the Internet, that, like, 40% of people that find me love it. 60% of people who find me hate it. And then the people who do learn it, some continue to love it, and some begin to hate it because they don't like the fact that they need to be at the top of their game. They don't like that part. They would prefer that I have a one size fits all, very easy. Do this and they will buy. Say this and they will buy. But that is not the way intelligent people work. That is not the way awakened people, people who are connected to themselves and their money and their way. That's not how they respond to life. They don't. They don't. They don't do it like that. They don't just say, oh, this one sentence made me buy. They don't say, because you wrote it like this, I bought it. They say, I can't quite put my finger on it. But there was something about you. There was something about your company, there was something about the software, there was something about it. That's how people buy. So we have got to be in the kind of energy that works. Now, this is such. This is so poorly represented in a lot of conversations, because a lot of people talk about high Vibe. And high Vibe can be a problem because you're not always excited and you're not always happy and you're not always giggly. That's not always how you feel. That's not what high vibe means. High vibe means you're looking at the situation like, I got this. Like, I've got this. And there are times where you may not feel, I've got this, but in that moment, and I know people want to know, but, Melannie, what about when I feel I don't got this, then how do I do it? And the answer. And you, you may love this and you might hate this, but stick with me. You don't. You don't sell high Ticket stuff where you have tons of responsibility as a seller when you don't even have the energy to sell it. The only time it works for you to sell something high ticket when you're not in the right energy is if it does not require you to serve the client whatsoever. So can you still sell a Lamborghini on a bad day? Yes. Can you sell a coaching package? Well, I mean, if you don't have the energy to sell the coaching package, how per se are you planning on delivering the service if you can't even sell it? So this is where we've got to have a conversation with ourselves where there's responsibility and we say there's a reason these buyers are being protected energetically. Because if they buy from me right now, I am not going to have the same pizzazz, the same care, the same connection, the same mental clarity, the same heart centered connection to them as I would on, on, on a day where I feel strong and I know that I got this and I don't need to be doing the moonwalk. I don't need to be like, I'm amazing. Like, it doesn't have to be like that, but it definitely needs to be, oh, I've got this, I'm clear, I'm focused, I know exactly what I'm doing. And on the days we struggle the most, there are the days where we're like, I don't even know why I do this business. I don't think anybody really loves me.

I was never going to be good enough anyway. That person does better than me and that person does better me.

And who am I kidding? Anyway, on that day, I recommend you do not sell no packages on that day because on that day you are not going to be the best delivery either. So there's a reason that there's energetic protection. It's not just punishment and people think it's a punishment. Oh, I'm being punished because I'm in a low vibe. That's not the mature way to look at it. The mature way to look at it is if I'm the service provider and I don't even have the energy to do the sale, why would I expect the buyer to buy knowing like this is, this is you when you're trying. It's like I have a conversation, same room. And let's talk about dating high profile individuals. What's a high profile individual? A person with a lot of stress on their, on their plate. A person who brings a lot of money to the table. A person who is capable of taking a lot of time off and being with their partner and being very focused. A high profile individuals. A person who is one of those like most eligible bachelors in the world.

Right?

Because this is what we're looking at in this moment when we're talking about, about high ticket buyers. High ticket buyers, high profile relationships. Same thing, right? And you're like, but what about when I feel like an absolute jerk today? Like, look, bottom line, Melanie, is I feel like an asshole and I've got this date tonight and I feel like every time I go on a date where I feel like that the relationship doesn't work out and I want to know, how do I bag a person where I'm an absolute jerk on the first date? Pour yourself a bath, breathe, have a chamomile tea, maybe some epsom salts and reschedule the date. Why are you gonna go all frustrated to this date because you need a partner tomorrow? Like, that's not how it works. But in business we wanna do that. Okay, I've got this. So I don't got this. I was crying five minutes ago. But like, I got this enough to try to sell and then I don't. And then I beat myself up even more. What about the buyer? What about the buyer? And can you imagine if this were you, would you want to be the one that comes in? When a person is literally not capable of holding the vibe, do you want to be the person that buys the thing? So what happens now? And I know the question mark is, well, what are we supposed to do? That means we can't make money unless we're rich. Well, what about the people who are bad in life and they make money? Yes, they're selling drugs. And guess what? People buy lots of drugs when they're miserable. Tons of drugs. That's actually when they do that the most. Well, what about what, what about the casino people? Oh yeah, those do great also. When people are depressed, they also go to the casinos. Casinos are crushing it. And what about the cigarette industry? Definitely also. And the alcohol business? Crushing it. Yes. And what about all the apps on Facebook? The dating apps, the porn apps. Yes, those are also making bank. And the online gambling. Yep, they're nailing it also. So yes, there's all kinds of companies that are doing so well right now when we're miserable, but that's not our businesses. For every person that comes to me with this, like, I have a heart centered business, why is it that I have to be high vibe in order to sell high ticket, I want you to just contemplate the Whole. The whole question, like, how would it not. How. How can it not be that that's our responsibility to our buyer. If we care about delivering a good service, that's part of the thing. So what do we do now, though? Because it is frustrating to hear that. I know I've been through days that I'm like, how am I ever going to get back up from today? This is so frustrating. I've had moments right before I'm supposed to go live on a sales call that make me so mad that I have a shortness of breath. The whole trauma thing happens, you know, I feel like I'm in danger in my house in that moment, and I'm like, I'm not. But I feel it. My heart's pounding. My face is bright red, My palms are sweaty. My stomach's in knots. The most annoying, frustrating message. Somebody's doing something, and I've got to go and do my sale right now. Oh, my gosh. I've been through those moments, and sometimes that's when I don't do the sale. That moment, I do a killer module and I re. And I do a shop with me a few days later when I'm in the vibe and I have needed to collapse time around how long I feel not good for. Like, sometimes when I first started this work, if I had a not good vibe, I could be not good for a very long time. Like, I could be not good for a long time. You know, you hear of people who don't talk to their. Their friends or their partners of this for, like, weeks and weeks and weeks on, and that's a long time to not be able to turn it around. So when we're in the personal development field or when we're in business, we're entrepreneurs, our mind is such a big piece of the puzzle. And it is every time you. You'll. They'll tell you all the ones that are successful, they'll tell you, you've got to work on your mindset. Some people are, like, tough with it. They'll be like, you've got to cut out every single person that could have access to you, and that could hurt your feelings. Like, you've got to cut. Are really tough like that. And other people will say, learn to regulate your nervous system. Learn to grow your capacity, Learn emotional intelligence, and you get to decide what's right for you. For me, what I wanted was to learn to grow my capacity to hold the people, to hold disappointment, to hold anger, to hold a moment of panic that hits me right before something Important to say, okay, how do I get my body to go back, back to normal? So there's a lot of conversations on the Internet about dysregulation, dysregulated nervous systems, about people who, you know, are trying to sell too big, big things that are too big or trying to make too much money and they can't hold it and it messes with their, their nervous system and it's not worth it. And it's. And don't do that to yourself, you're going to burn out. And so I want to talk to you about that because this is a real thing when it comes to this kind of business. So I cannot tell you that you are not going to have anxiety in this business. In your business if you want to bring in high ticket. Because high ticket means this matters a lot. It means the value needs to be high. It means the client needs to be satisfied. It means it's the client that knows themselves. It's a client that honors themselves. It's a client that respects themselves. It's a person that's not going to tolerate it not being good enough. And so it is a lot of pressure. If you can't handle the pressure of that, high ticket might not be a good idea. It might be easier for you to sell something on the lower end because on the worst case they're not happy. You give them a hundred bucks back. You can handle your business can handle that. No pressure. Where it starts to feel really scary is like an unhappy client wants a $30,000 refund. Like what if you weren't organized for that? And, and so this is why in this line of work also because when it's the service business, you also have to revise your policies. Sometimes there can't be a refund policy because buyers that are not regulated, and this happens a lot, people who buy from a not regulated place, so they see a bunch of people getting successful. They buy, they buy a Lamborghini because they made one big sale and they got too excited and the salesman got them all exc. They bought the Lamborghini, now they want to refund the Lamborghini because they thought, they thought about it. It's a bad idea. Well, there's some companies where you can get a refund and there's some where you can't. It depends on the contract. And so what I chose in my business is to never push people to buy, but also to have a non refund policy because I can't live feeling like every second someone could cancel their payments that just doesn't feel right. If I'm going to be guaranteed that I have to pay a sales team, it can't be that all of a sudd don't make their payments because or else I'm not regulated because I still need to make right by my team and I still need to pay all of my bills. And so, and I build the team in comparison to the people that are coming in to buy. And so there's got to be some sort of a system in order, a trust system. And with money it's very hard to have trust and that's why we need contracts. So there's different parts of this regulation that can occur. There's a dysregulation in offering the thing. Who's going to trust me, who's going to like me enough, who's going to buy this? Then there's a dysregulation. Once person bought it, what if they're the only one who bought it? Or what if they don't appreciate it or they don't like it or what if I don't do good enough? Then there's a disregulation of actually maybe they don't like it and they want a refund or they thought about it and they don't want to. Then there's the dysregulation of potentially having to give a refund or standing for no refund policy because both of those suck, no matter what side of it you're on. Then there's the dysregulation of selling the thing again after someone's asked for a refund and you were questioning whether you're good enough anymore. There's a lot of it. And so what's our job as a high ticket sellers? Whether you are selling houses and you're waiting for the, the mortgage payment, the, you know, the final documents to go through and you're on pins and needles because the whole deal could fall through with one signature and you're on pins and needles. Whether it's something like that, whether it's cars, whether it's jewelry, whether it's coaching, whether it's, you know, matchmaking and relationships or philanthropy, whether it's investments, whatever it is, there is a high risk that people will pull out. There's a high risk of stress. So you've got to decide whether you're willing to become strong enough. And it's not necessarily something that's going to happen for you overnight. It's not like, oh yes, I'm willing, oh, I'm strong enough. It's like once you decide you want to be strong enough, you're going to be tested. Leaders are bridges, and bridges are tested. Sometimes you're tested with a client that's not satisfied. Sometimes you're tested with people not buying. Sometimes you're tested with all kinds of things. If you're going to quit the minute someone wants to leave, wants a refund, isn't happy with you, then that shows you if you're capable of doing this or not. And it's okay if you're not. So many people want the High Ticket thing out of ego, not even out of desire. So you've got to get clear that this is actually something that you want. It's a lot of pressure selling High Ticket. It's like if I bought something, a jewel, a piece of jewelry from Tiffany's, and it, it broke the minute I brought it home. And you brought, bought a piece of jewelry from Tiffany's and yours broke when you brought it home and all of a sudden everybody's jewelry pieces break. Tiffany's wouldn't be Tiffany's. It's the fact that the craftsmanship is world class. The diamonds come from sustainable sources that there's, there's so many things they had to put in place in order for that to work. And that's a lot of pressure. They can't. If they run out of diamonds to sell, they're done. They've got to constantly be mining for new diamonds. And what if they mine new diamonds and all of a sudden the economy changes and nobody's buying? Then they're stuck with a bunch of diamonds they can't sell. That's also a risk. Like the risk in a High ticket is huge because you've got to be prepared for a bunch of people buying and you've got to be prepared for people not buying at all. And it's all your responsibility. And this is the kind of conversation people aren't really having about this work and it's why people aren't surviving it. And they go from putting High Ticket on a pedestal to vilifying it. And we see it every day. It's old news. Like, so easy. Make all this money. It gets to be so easy. And then the year after, you're so dysregulated if you're doing this and you, it's going to be so hard for you. And it's like you just, you just didn't do the work. You just thought it would be easy. It's. It's not easy. It's a huge freaking deal. It's a big responsibility to put yourself out there as a high ticket brand and you've got to learn how to do it and you've got to learn how to navigate the feelings. So we're going to talk about how you navigate the feeling around failure of any kind, around this. Whether it's that no one bought, whether they were not satisfied, whether they wanted a refund, whether you're in a legal battle, whatever it is, it's going to cause stress and pressure. So the, the real question here is how much real joy do you have in your life? How much real peace do you have in your life? Where do you get love? Where do you get, where do you unplug? Who do you get to speak with? Where do you get to talk and you're heard and you're validated and you get to be speaking with someone who gets you. Where do you get to. When do you get to turn the phone off entirely and not look at anything else? Like you need that? Because the biggest mistake where people really lose their lives in this is when they are just going from work to stressing about work to work to stressing about work. And there's nothing that offers any relief. There's no pleasure. Today I had. So I've been going through some stressful things that's part of growing a business this size. And it's, it's not just Alpha fan. I've got real estate projects and huge things that require my focus and my ability to hold pressure right now. But so today I had a facial and a massage and a manicure and a pedicure and I shut my phone off for a little while and that was nice. And people would look at that and say, you had a manicure and a pedicure and a facial and this and that. And like, oh, you know, you don't need to have a manicure and a pedicure in order to make money. No, you don't. But if you don't, if you only have stress and thinking about stress, then you don't have a life. And if you don't have a life, then what's the point of having tons of money? So what's the thing that makes you calm? I've seen people make fun of every single thing on the Internet. Making fun of people who take bubble baths in the afternoon, making fun of people who do spa masks and rituals. They make fun of people who dance, they make fun of people who meditate. And it's like if that's the thing that gives you the calmness I don't care who's laughing. That's what you've got to do. If. If what unplugs you is a bath in the middle of the afternoon, you have a bath every day. If it's having a dance party in your living room and shaking your bum, you do that every day, as often as you want. If that's what makes the energy come out of your body. And you might see a person dance like that and think it's entirely silly and think, who does that? That's so ridiculous. While you're sitting by a fire, having a glass, you know, a cup of chamomile tea, listening to some bougie music. That's your dance party. We've got to stop shaming people for how they release stress and tension in their bodies. There's all kinds of ways that people do this. Some people out. Some people do yoga, some people meditate, Some people do art. Some people, it's intimate time with their partner. Some people shut everything down, go for a walk in the woods. Some people go hiking. Some people. You've got to find things that. That really detach you. Because if not, the only thing you'll ever do to figure out what's wrong with your offer or yourself or your buyer is you'll try to just sit there and try to work at it more. And that's never what works with the high ticket sales. It's never about sitting down and trying to figure out what more. That's not it. And the more you do that, the further away you get from it. It'll. It'll elude you every time, like, ah, it won't work. I don't know. There's something you'll notice. All your best ideas, they happened like they interrupted you doing something else. That was great. And sometimes it's as simple as a shower. Who gets good ideas in the shower? Like, you're just relaxed and all of a sudden you're like, you're dripping wet. You to get an arm out of the shower and you're like, I've got to do a voice memo to myself. Or I've got to write this down. Like right there, you're driving. It's a beautiful scenery. You're in that flow where your mind doesn't need to worry about an exit for a while. And all of a sudden, boom. Oh my gosh. Like right now, there's something. You're just falling asleep or me. Today, in the middle of my facial, I'm like, I need a pen. No, I need to Relax. I'm like, no, but I just had the best idea. Do it after, but I want to do it now. Like you in the moment where you feel the most at peace. Walking your dog, cooking, you know, grocery shopping, getting your hair done, getting your nails done, where both your hands are busy and you can't type, that's a great time to get a great idea. This is when things are going to start to unblock for you, is when you're actually at peace. It's. And what's difficult about this is that the online representation of that sometimes looks extremely cheap. I'm running myself a bath and having multi million dollar ideas. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. I was out for a manicure and I had this million dollar idea. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. I booked myself a day at a hotel and I was just me with no one to bother me and I ordered room service and I made a 10k in a day. Sure, I swear. And it didn't happen because I booked the hotel. It booked because of what I allowed my mind to do, what I allowed my body to do. I let myself go. I let. I let the pressure go. Because the thing is, value is on the frequency of value. Desires on the frequency of desire, luxuries on the frequency of luxury. You're not going to think up your next luxury idea while you're trying to figure out how to make money because your gas bill's late. Like, that's just not where the idea happens. You might be able to find a really great last minute, like, how does this help people? But you probably won't find your next best luxury idea when you're under pressure. So what can you do for yourself? And I know it's counterproductive for a lot of people to think when I'm at the most need of doing something. I'm going to disconnect from my work. That sounds completely ridiculous, but let's put it in another context next. If you're having an issue in your marriage, does it make sense to say, let's, let's go. Let me just take a breather from this conversation and let me take a bath. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. Does it make sense to say, I'm gonna go to a hotel for one night, I'm gonna get a massage, I'm gonna get a facial, I'm gonna relax. I'm so pent up and I'm so angry. I need to think. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. I'm gonna go walk the dog. I need. I need a minute. I'm Gonna take a shower I'm gonna wash my hair I'm gonna, I'm gonna take some time for me yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah A fight with my partner and then I booked myself into a five star hotel and the next day we were no longer fighting. No. But that's a lot of the ways that sometimes it's represented when people are having financial breakthroughs and so people discredit it. They discredit it because it sounds silly, and they discredit it because some people haven't done that yet. They say they did that because it's one of the ways to represent something effortless and easy. Because when you actually do that, there's a way that you explain it that's like, oh my gosh, I get it. And so I want you to think about what do you really do to support your genius on a daily basis? What if you think about it, if you are a mastermind, genius person that is capable of creating offers in your life and in your business that are an energetic match for the kind of people who value their money, value their lives, their businesses, their marriages, their, their health, their. All the things like, you're that kind of person. How are you, how are you treating this, this human, this genius human? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you hydrating your brain enough? Are you nice to yourself? When you're feeling anxiety and panic, do you allow yourself to reschedule something that needs you to perform? If you need a moment, can you add value instead and sell later? Do you let yourself disconnect, unplug, breathe? Or do you tell yourself you can't and you're not allowed? Because that's what most people do, and that's when the decline starts. I just can't. I need to figure it out. I don't know why this is happening. It used to be this way, it used to be that way. So in the buyer paradigm, the beautiful thing and the most pleasant experience is when you go to buy the thing that you want to buy. You're buying it from a person who feels super happy or super chill or super calm or excited or passionate, because they are. So the misrepresentation of this teaching is to say, you've got to be passionate for people to buy. And for people say, well, how do I be passionate? I don't know how to be passionate when I feel this way. It's not like that. It's your, your buyer deserves to buy from, from someone who is squeaky clean, that the passion shines through, that the joy shines through that the gratitude is shining through, that the peace of mind is shining through. Because part of the buyer experience is to buy and feel good when you're buying. So when you're speaking to a person who's stressed and you can tell and they're a little annoyed with your questions and you can tell and they're worried you're not going to buy and you can tell that buyer experience is dropping at warp speed. It's like, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. So it's not you've got to do this for people to buy. It's that the buyer deserves you to be in this energy. Can you see how that completely changes the conversation from the superficial you need to be high vibe, you need to be happy, you need to be passionate. It's like, you don't need to be. That's your natural state. So if something is off, you want to override that. So your client pays you. Are you really caring about your client in that moment? And the companies that are being a lot more caring and a lot more focused on the buyer, if they had an employee that came in not well, they would send the employee home and say, hey, take a personal day. We've got you, we'll bring someone else in. Or there's enough of us on the floor. It's better for the store to have you be home taking care of yourself. It's better for you that you're home taking care of yourself and it's better for the clients. But a store that's all about numbers and minutes and sales will say, leave your problems at the door. We need bodies, not souls. And so why this next level is really appealing to this next level buyer is this is about the human. It's about the experience, the respect, the level of care, the level of personalization, the human connection, the relationship, the vibe. So none of that works without, without you at your, at your best. So you've got to take care of yourself and that's got to become like part of your job, which is so wild and so crazy and so amazing all at the same time. Because in a lower paying job, the job can be done whether you're a robot or whether you're not. Like, I don't care, you're not happy. Switch your feelings off and press the buttons. Nobody asked you how you're feeling today. You get to go home when you're done. But in the high level money jobs, it's like the more magnetic you are, the more valuable you are. So on a day where you're not. Well, it's a good investment for you to rest. But do you do that? Do you treat yourself like your best employee? Or do you give yourself time off and use that time to scroll endlessly at people who trigger you, get mad at the Internet, mad at people, mad at everything, and then wonder why that day off didn't help you, when in fact you went down a rabbit hole from hell. And you feel more anxious now than you did before. Turn the phone off. Take your shoes off. Go barefoot on the ground if that helps. Shake your booty. Have a dance party, you know, run a bubble bath, breathe, meditate, binaural beats. Go for a massage, manicure, pedicure, blowout. Change your hairstyle. Do something that makes you feel like you matter. And it's crazy because different times in your life, different things will. Will make that feel good. Sometimes it'll be like, you know what? I want to go shopping and I want to. I want to go experience the buyer experience I give to everybody else for myself. Like, I want to go feel that for me as an empowered buyer, not as someone who's going to get manipulated to buy something. Because I know my power. I know that the value is in me having the money. And I'm allowed to spend it where I want. I'm regulated. I'm good. I just want to take care of me. And I go and I go and I have a good day at the mall, the store, at the spa, the hotel. It doesn't matter what you do. What matters is why you go and how you allow yourself to feel. Do you feel the gratitude? The calm? Do you feel. Because the minute you start to calm down and you start to remember what this is all about, all the ideas will come back and the energy will come forward and all of a sudden that magnetism that you were pushing so hard to find will be knocking at your heart and knocking at your spirit. Like, let me in right now. Like, don't interrupt me, I'm supposed to be chill thing. No time for this. I have an idea. You will be interrupted by your genius ideas. But you've gotta disconnect for realsies. It can't just be pretend that you're being chill so that you have an idea that doesn't work. It doesn't work in anything. Pretend you're having a good first date so you get a husband. That doesn't work. If it's not actually good, it's not actually good. If it's not actually connecting, it's not actually connecting. If you're not in the vibe, you're not in the. If you're not on the zone, you're not in the zone. So I would love to bring up just whoever's feeling this right now that you're like, oh, no. Like, I have not done this for myself in a really long time. And I think I'm just getting the hint right now. I think I'm really seeing and maybe I'm lost. And I'm like, well, how does this apply to me? Like, anything that you're like, from this conversation and you'd like to come forward and chat with me. Does anybody have anything right now that's coming up? Just want to make sure everybody's squeaky clean before I move on to the next thing. And this is the beauty of these programs, you know, because I have the time to actually be with you and ask. Like, this is more of a mastermind style. And I just want to let you guys know, like, the future of Alpha Femme is kind of changing quite a bit. And what's going to be happening is that there's going to be programs and there's going to be programs that are more like masterminds. And in the future, the buyer will be a mastermind. It's going to be more like what we're doing now, where every time it's like, who's got something? And let's talk about it instead of just full blown modules of me talking. Because I feel like this is where the transformation really occurs is in making sure we're on the same page and we got it. And if you don't got it, that I got you. Right. Let's see. Swimming at the beach every day for me, I totally resonate with needing a pen, running to the sand, getting a pen out of my bag. This is good. Okay. Sarah says I have too much. You have too much what? Tell me. Unmute yourself.

I have too much of everything and anything.

Well, let's start with some of it.

Oh, my God. I. I'm kind of, like, not shy, not disappointed, but I'm feeling so many emotions because I'm excited about the buyer. The bias is just, like, perfect. But the buyer, plus this, plus that, plus this, plus that. Not encourage me, not put me, but, like, create an opportunity to go in a hole, to jump in. So came at the. At the pools. I came in the hole, no water. And I felt pressure. I felt in some feelings. I. I felt like. I think I felt them for the first time of my life. Well, asleep, like I felt on the 11th of 11. I felt not good enough. Is that good enough? Feeling is talking to me. Yeah, it was. And it's still a little bit. So I felt not enough. I feel. I felt not seen, not recognized. I felt that a lot of things I did was for validation. It's not part of my life. Okay, is it good?

So.

I've been so tested. Like, you know, I asked for like my address and my information to. To get out of any kind of list of bad experience and bad news. Like, I'm done. I'm done. I'm retired.

I wish I could tell you that it works like that, but it doesn't. But let's. I've. I got something from your show. I got something from your share. So when you're saying having the. The buyer and this and that and this, it creates a pressure. Is it a time pressure? Like how much time it takes to watch it all and to. And to be connected to it all? Or is it more the information that creates the pressure?

Can you tell it's not about. Well, it can be about the timeline, but it's a detail. It's. It doesn't mean not. It's about the comparison.

Yeah.

With others. And it's not part of me. I don't compare myself. I know my value and that's it. But like, seeing so many, so, so, so much program, so much offer for like, for only person things, that was so nice, so mindful. I was like, okay, I'm not there yet. Okay. Oh, oh, okay. I'm not ready yet. I have. I still don't have. So I was, I was doing my. I was doing like, I don't have not enough list. Like, whoa.

So let's look at the flip side of that. So although all that was happening, what were you doing to give yourself the love, the care, the well being, the calm? What are some things you did for yourself to try to balance that?

I don't need. I don't. I. Well, I didn't do something special, but I receive something special. I realized and that that's not nice, but it's magic. I realized that I hate to have limits. I hate to be blocked. I. I want to be free. I want. And I realized that in the last six months, I refused or I avoid or I disconnect the needs of taking care. Only take care of me. So I think I'm living kind of a rebound or back. Not backflip, but backlash or. Well, something like that.

Yes.

I hacked. Mostly hacked. Like if. Nothing where. Priority. Why like if I lost my English, I act like If I had no priority, main priority in my life, life, like, I was doing my things, just like if nothing were there, it seemed like, okay, you rush yourself. You, you, you. I was not in danger, but I put myself, like, on the line. And, and it's, it's good to grow. It's good to. It's good. But the rhythm, I think that was not fairly sustainable.

Okay, so let me, Let me address this because I feel like this is very important. When we imagine what success is going to look like, when we imagine what having all of the time and the money and the energy and the this. And I want to do this, and I want to do that, and I want to have that. When we think about what that looks like, it looks very different than being in it. And this is why a lot of times people are going to have this experience of putting success on a pedestal and then vilifying it, because before they have it, they imagine it will be one way. And after they've had it, they see it worse than it actually was because of how much they had expected it to be. But in fact, success in any, in anything you're working on, it takes time, energy. It takes you to stretch and to grow. It takes understanding, realizations, maturing, so many things that need to happen. And so when you start your journey and you don't know that it takes this. It's so easy to put anything on a pedestal. One day I'll get there. One day I'll be able to do this, and when I do it, this is going to happen for me, and that's going to happen for me. When I do this, I just know I'm going to be successful. The minute I write the book, it's going to be crazy. I'm going to be an overnight success. And the minute I start a podcast, there's going to be so many clients, I won't know what to do with them. And, you know, when I join this high ticket mastermind, oh, my gosh, it's going to be the floodgates, you know, like, I've got to be prepared for this. We put the experience on a pedestal, and then when we're there, instead of saying, okay, this is it, now I'm in it, how am I navigating this? Am I really utilizing this to the best of its capacity? Am I really plugged into this? Am I staying focused on myself? Am I connected to my needs? Am I. Am I steering this machine properly? We're like, what the heck is this? What the heck is that? Wait, this Is not what I thought it was. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And if we don't take the power back, we end up going through the whole journey, and when it's over, we're like, I don't think I even knew what I was doing when I was on that machine. I don't know what I was doing. I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know what. I just know that I was freaking out, and I, I, I don't think it was a good idea or I regret it or this or that. So these conversations are so important because they give you an anchor point in the middle of the storm. They give you a moment to say, is this. I'm going to mute you just while I'm responding. Okay. Is this actually a beneficial, Is this a beneficial way of navigating this moment for me? Or is there, Is there a deeper way that I can handle what's happening? So let's say, for example, you come into the Alpha femme experience and you're like, okay, I want, I want to have all the things, because I want to learn about all the things. And in your mind, that seems so easy. You have all the things, you're going to learn all the things. But really, each module takes an hour or more. There's a few of them a day that are available to you. You need to learn how to navigate that, and that might feel like a lot, but at the same time, you're asking for four or five more clients, and the universe is showing you what four or five more hours looks like in your life, and you're going, I can't do this well. It's like, well, there's no wonder those clients aren't there yet. Then you've got to learn to navigate your schedule, your nervous system. You've got to notice what you're doing for validation versus what you're doing because it's correct for you. That's the mature next level. But if you're not noticing that while you're in it, you notice it after you're in it. And that comes with. And this is what I want to share with the group because it's so important when you only have the realizations and the breakthroughs after the opportunity is passed, that's when the guilt and the shame comes through. I did not handle this properly. I did not do this properly. I did not. I was not the best version of me. I messed this up. I did not do well. And the worst thing is people have a very hard time Staying connected in spaces where they experience shame. So as soon as you're holding shame in your body and you hold a space responsible for it, it will become increasingly hard for you to show up there anymore. And this is why most people quit. Not because they can't take it, because they can't take the shame that they feel for having missed a certain point in the thing they thought would be easy. And they don't know how to regulate that shame, they don't know how to deal with it. And so they disconnect entirely to not have to feel it. The things you're going to have to really learn to navigate is guilt and shame along your journey because there's going to be a bunch of it, that you should have done better, that you should have sustained longer, that you should have responded differently, that you should have reacted differently, that you shouldn't have made a decision, that you should have made a decision, that you shouldn't have made it sooner, that you shouldn't have made it at all, that you didn't know, that you weren't informed, that you should have asked questions, that you should have. You should have. All of that is gonna cost you so much time and energy. So my question to you, Sarah, was I understand that there's been a lot of overwhelm and a lot of things and a lot of things, but how did you take care of yourself during this? And what you said is, I didn't really do anything special. And what I want to share with you is that it isn't special to take care of yourself. It's necessary at this level because it's like the courses, the time, the energy, the creation, the photo shoots, those are necessary. And so there needs to be a, an equivalent. I don't touch my phone. I'm completely. I go to the restaurant or I close, or I go to the spa, or I sit in the bathtub at home, or I journal in my journal for no reason at all. And I play soft music. There has to be some of that. And it cannot feel like that is special, that's not special. That is necessary. So after this conversation, seeing how you spent a lot of time in comparison, and I totally get that, that is so normal. It's the moment you realize there's so many other great brands out there. And when you think about the top brands that make it, that people find out, you know, Aritzia Zara, Louis Vuitton, Michael Kors, doesn't matter how, what the price point is, when you think of the ones that are, well, known. They're constantly thinking about their competition. They can't make it to where they are without the acknowledgment that there's other people that also have similar brands. And so if we can't handle the pressure of that being true, we can't even make it to that because you have to know what your competition is or what else is out there in the marketplace before you can even be in the marketplace place. So that's one of the first traumas you've got to go through. Holy crap. I'm not. I'm special and I'm unique, but I'm not the only one. That's one of those weird mind warping moments of like, I'm not just unique because I had this idea, I'm unique because I'm me. But 10 of us had this idea, how do I handle that pressure?

I wasn't in that mood. It wasn't about like, I'm less because they are much. It was just like, I should be able to do that. How come I don't have like four yet? Or I was, I was just like. Maybe I think it comes from my past because like 10, 15 years ago when I was doing something like a conference, a training, like I had a waiting list. But I'm not an has been like nothing has changed. It's just that my energy is different, my intention is different and everything is different.

But we're gonna do something together.

Together.

We're going to do something together. I want you to take a really deep breath. I'm going to challenge you for the rest of this conversation to stop touching your shirt or your watch.

Okay?

Okay. No more this just no come down. You have got it in you to do something really huge and you know it. The version of you that doubts it is outside of your power. You're not. It's not the part of you when you quiet your mind and you're still and you're certain that part doesn't doubt anything. It's when you go up in your head and you start thinking that everything goes. Because in this stillness where you are right now, I feel your power. And so what I'm going to ask you to do for yourself as often as you can is to take yourself out of your mind and into your body. And you need to find out what the things are that you need to do that brings you here. Because your funniness, your humor, your mannerisms, you're pulling your. This thinking of things, all of that, it takes you out of your power. It's like a ball of fire that lives inside of you. And sometimes you can't even handle your own power. And so you let it do little things. A little spark here and a little spark there and a little spark there. And then it diminishes the big ball of power. It's not comfortable to hold power. It's. It's much easier to be funny and quirky and blah, blah, blah. It's much easier to do that. But in this moment, who you're being, just. Just the stillness and who you're being, I can tell what it takes for you to hold this. This is where your answers are. You will get the clients, you will get the buyers. You will get the ideas. You will remember the confidence. You will remember the weightless person inside of you. All of that is here outside of the distractions. The rest is a game your mind is playing with you. It's not real. So anytime you find yourself fidgeting, you know what it means to fidget. Anytime you feel that energy wanting to come out a certain way, what do you need to do to bring it back? It might not be meditation, but it might be. Maybe it is. Let me go sit on the floor in my shower and just breathe. Let me go take a bath. Let me sit in front of the mirror and look at myself and breathe. Let me sit and journal. You've got to quiet the opportunity for you to be loud and you've got to go into the stillness because this is where the power is. And you don't need anybody right in like this. You don't need anybody. You don't need anything. Just your wisdom, your intellect, your focus, your breath.

You're right.

So my challenge for you during this program is to find practices that bring you back to here and share with us what those are. What have you discovered that brings you back here in a moment? Because it's a lot easier. And this is what calibration is. When you're with a person that is grounded, that groundedness that you have in you can ground so much faster because it's like. Like I match what I desire. But when you're surrounded by excitable people or people who are stressed, you could also get caught up in their energy. And being in a group with a bunch of excitable people, you could lose your power just being in the group with other people if you forget that your power is the groundedness. So as often as possible, you're going to bring yourself back to the state. And the. Your biggest goal in this program is to find how to bring yourself back here. So many ways that bring you back to this power and we'll see what comes from this. I think you'll be shocked.

I hope so.

There's no other way. It's so palpable. The difference in your energy is night and day. One is like and the other one.

Is like I, I told you.

But in this way, there's nothing you can't do. Your conversations will land stronger, your message will land more. And that doesn't mean you don't get to be genuinely excited. It's just when the excitement is a response to try to disempower yourself, you get jumbled. So and it's a trick. Our minds play tricks on us. Self sabotage is a real thing. Like I'm afraid of my power. Self sabotage fizzle it out. But if you can ground it it. This is where the mastery of energetics comes from is to be able to channel where all the energy wants to leak and bringing it right back to one spot and let that spot shine. So this is your homework and when you feel like you want to talk about it more on another module and you've tried it and you've tested it, you tell me I'm ready. I want to talk about that. And I'll bring you right back up.

Thank you.

Thank you. See this, this is the kind of work that's for the entire group because I felt the whole group change in that, in that experience and when you've got the willingness to share and I know some of you watch here and you don't necessarily want to ask questions and you're like, I'm more of a watcher. I'm not going to ask. Ask. This vulnerability, it's scary sometimes but what Sarah just did for the group is, is an opportunity for everybody to see themselves. It's a huge freaking mirror where you go.

I still have something to share.

Share.

Because this, I think this is maybe not the first step but a main step in, in, in my cast, I invest myself writing a post and. And I was really proud of Mikas. Like I should not say that but it took me like four hours. I invest myself and then big investment. And in this post I did just like many.

Bring your energy back. Look at me.

Yeah.

Focus.

Yeah, I did. I did the same thing as many people in the group do. Like I asked for guidance in, in what I was struggling and the gift was perfect because I asked like I was. Well, I asked for guidance and just one person answered me and nothing related to my question and my Desire and my asking. And it was like.

Bring yourself back. What did you actually think? I don't think you thought. What did you actually feel?

I was in this moon. I was like, is it serious? I opened myself, I put my heart. I asked for guidance, and no guidance. Seriously. So I was like, yeah, I was, like, surprised, shocked, not frustrated, but disappointed. And I hope I kept holding that. I accept that. And I was contemplating that. And after that, I realized that I was asking for guidance, but that was under a huge need of validation and attention. So I. Why I didn't receive what I was asking for. So the gift, but not that easy gift was to. Was to tap in the feeling of being annoyed, rejected, not interest. And I was like, oh, my God, okay, I'm gonna hold it, I'm gonna receive it. Gonna be grateful for, like, the perspective that I can have, but it's been huge.

This is good. If you were to become successful in these programs because you got validation from a group of peers, it would be brutal out there. It's okay if you feel good. If you were to only feel good because people in here.

That easy gift was to. Was to tap in the feeling of being annoyed, rejected, not interest. And I was like, oh, my God. Okay, I'm gonna hold it, I'm gonna receive it. Gonna be grateful for, like, the perspective.

That I can foresaw you. Then when you go out there, it's not real. The idea is that the genuine response here matches the genuine response out there. And I can tell you, I have no doubt the conversation we had today is going to impact everything. If you. If you actually go by this work, because I can tell you, you might not be able to tell the difference because you're in your own body, but the more have.

But it's been huge.

This is good. If you were to become successful in these programs because you got validation from a group of peers, it would be brutal out there. It's okay if you feel good. If you were to only feel good because people in here, you bring yourself back to your presence. You will feel it in the smallest little shift shifts. The difference of who you are when you look, when you talk and you look at me versus the difference of who you are when you look up here, when you're talking is night and day. Can you imagine if I. If I spoke to you and I was like, so basically what I was doing is this, like, you wouldn't feel the same about me if I spoke like this. Every time you go outside of the conversation, every time you. You move something or you fix something, I can tell your energy isn't here. This is the little subtle differences that make someone, like, successful and that makes someone good or that makes someone entirely invisible, as crazy as that is. And I've worked with my clients on so many little things like this. Some of my clients that I helped in masterminds and helping them with how they speak and how they show up in their body and how they, how they move. Because how you are in your body shows how you feel when you're going like this. There's something uncomfortable, there's something not grounded, there's something that you're trying to avoid or saw you. Then when you go out there, it's not real. The idea is that the genuine response here matches the genuine response out there. And I can tell you, I have no doubt the conversation we had today is going to impact everything if you, if you actually go by this work, because I can tell you, you might not be able to tell the difference because you're in your own body. But the more when you're here, there's something that's present, there's something that's real, there's something that's grounded. So it's in your posts. I'm sure I would find a hundred nuances in that post. And I would say, I catch this energetic drop. I catch this energetic drop. So it's not about how do I make the post better, but it's, were you writing the post as the person you are right now? No, you were writing the post as the person maybe you were when you came on wanting to say yes. In this, you're giving, in the other one you're needing to receive. And so when we're wanting to be mentors, leaders, our job is to write in a way that's giving. And when we're writing it in order to receive, it shifts to why the post is being written and doesn't land the same way. So this is a huge awareness, not just for you, but for the entire group. I thank you for sharing this. And I'm telling you, as you manage your energy, you bring yourself back to your presence. You will feel it in the smallest little shifts. The difference of who you are when you look, when you talk and you look at me versus the difference of who you are when you look up here, when you're talking is night and day. Can you imagine if I, if I spoke to you and I was like, so basically what I was doing is this, like, you wouldn't feel the same about me if I Spoke like this year around this, it's going to change because potency people have been so. Every time you go outside of the conversation, every time you mad at me. Over the years, they've said I do the exact same thing as you. I've, I've done. My brand is beautiful like yours. My graphics are beautiful like yours. I take the time with my posts. English is my first language. I write better than you. You have English. You have grammar mistakes in your stuff. You have spelling. My stuff is better than yours. Why doesn't it work? And I can tell them in the way they, they, the way they ask the question. It's like because you need it to work, you're not doing it for them, you're doing it for you. Or because you have this, because you have that. It's like it's an energy thing. And we, when we catch it and we can work on it, we start to develop this magical power, this magnetism. But it comes from our ability to hold. You move something or you fix something. I can tell your energy isn't here. This is the little subtle differences that make someone, like, successful. Their own magic within us. And a lot of us have a hard time of holding our own magic and we're asking other people to hold it. You want someone else to witness you in all of your magic, and you have a hard time even holding it in one place. When that stops being a struggle, the magnetism will become stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger. And I'll give you this as a cue when you listen. And that makes someone good or that makes someone entirely invisible, as crazy as that is. And I've worked with my clients on so many little things like this. Some of my clients that I helped in masterminds and helping them with how they speak and how they show up in their body and how they, how they move, because your energy is very strong. It's when you go to express yourself sometimes that you disconnect fast. So practice even just talking to yourself in front of the mirror or do, do videos for you. See how hard it is or how easy it is to stay focused and to keep the focus on the camera, to look at yourself in your own eyes. Stay grounded in your energy. It's going to change everything. Everything. How you are in your body shows how you feel when you're going like this. There's something uncomfortable, there's something not grounded. There's something that you're trying to avoid.

I'm gonna do it. I feel it like I did the.

Photo Shoot like you did the photo shoot I did. Let's go.

Thank you. Thank you to every one of you.

Thank you for being here and thank you for sharing.

Love, my community.

Good. And I think you're going to see a very big difference in the community when you show up as the people, as the person we expect to feel. Sometimes when you're here, there's something that's present, there's something that's real, there's something that's grounded. So it's in your posts. I'm sure I would find a hundred nuances in that post. And I would say I, I catch this energetic drop. I catch this energetic drop. It doesn't matter that your name's above the post. If the energy in the words doesn't match what we expect, we don't even see it. What makes it invisible is not you. It's the energy of the post. If the name that it says at the top stop doesn't match the energy in the words, the whole post gets missed, not because it was yours, but because the energy wasn't there. So remember that it's never you that gets dismissed. It's your energy. And that's a, that's a gift, as you said.

Yeah, you're right. It, there's, it's, it's, it's tiny.

So it's not about how do I make the post better, but it's. Were you writing the post as the person you are right now?

It's, it's. But it's, it's, it's, it's huge.

It's tiny. But no, you were writing the post as the person. Maybe you were when you came on. It's huge. And that's usually how it is. Tony Robbins talks about a 1 millimeter shift. He says you hit the golf ball 1 millimeter off, it ends up in the woods. And that's what energetics is. It's a millimeter in your body and it's an entirely different person in the world. So that's what. Yes, in this, you're giving. In the other one, you're needing to receive. And so when we're wanting to be mentors, leaders, our job is to write in a way that's giving. And when we're writing it in order to receive it, we've got to focus on, so we've got to keep the focus so much on who we're being and notice when our energy leaks because the cleaner we are here, once it expands out, the straighter it stays. And, and it's not Easy. But that's the actual work.

At least we have a safe place. Please.

Yes, that's for sure.

Thank you.

Thank you. This is awesome. Okay, I want to see what people said about this. This was a. This was beautiful and so helpful for everyone. Sarah. Thank you. Great shifts to why the post is being written and doesn't land the same way. So this is a huge awareness not just for you but for the entire group. I thank you for sharing this and I'm telling you as you manage your end job, Sarah. We love you, Sarah. Thank you, Sarah. So many hearts, so many love, so much, so powerful. You might enjoy listening to guided yoga. Nidra Non sleep deep rest that works the subconscious nervous system. I'm reminded of your question to me and my answer inside Marketplace of how long it took me to write one of my posts. Oh, that's what I wanted to say to the group. I wrote a poetry around this. It's going to change because potency people have been so mad at me over the years. They've said I do the exact same thing as you. I've. I've. My brand is beautiful like yours. My graphics are beautiful like yours. I take. Take the time with my. Today that, that shows up. That showed up on my. On my wall. If you haven't seen it, it's a. The image is a teacup. And you can ask Kevin how long it took me to refine that post. It was a post I had already written. I don't know how long it took me the first time I wrote it, but it took me an hour and a half to refine it today. So if you get in your head about it taking too long to write posts, I'm not a believer that the fast written post is the best post. I will sometimes take a whole day to write a post and then not even post it and then look at it again tomorrow and then not even post it and then look at it another day and then post posts. English is my first language. I write better than you. You have English. You have grammar mistakes in your stuff. You have spell. My stuff is better than yours. Why doesn't it work then? By the time I post it, I've spent seven hours on it. That happens. But by the time that happens, I'm like. And I can tell them in the way they. They the way they ask the question. It's like. Because you need like I could write a whole program about this post. I've contemplated it and I've written it in the exact energetics it deserves to be. And Just look at the comments of that post. It's not just like hearts. Yay. Beautiful. People are writing paragraphs like, this is so exquisitely written. When are you writing need it to work? You're not doing it for them, you're doing it for you. Or because you have this, because you have that. It's like it's an energy thing. And when. When we catch it and we can work on it, we start to develop the this a book, this. But that's the energetic match to. I don't care how long it takes. What I care is that it's the right post. So just reminding yourself. Who cares how long it takes? It doesn't matter how long it takes. What matters is that you got it the way you wanted it. And that is very important. Let's see. Self sabotage. This is literally me. So Mary says when people are buying all at once, I'm like, enough, stop. But of course, consciously I don't want that. But I see the power and I limit it. And that's huge power of stillness and. And spaciousness. Priscilla, I've been trying to convince people how important it is to regulate their nervous system and processing emotions. But I don't need to convince people. I desire to connect with the women. That magical power, this magnetism. But it comes from our ability to hold our own magic within us. And a lot of us have a hard time of holding our own magic. And we already know it and want to go deeper. I absolutely love that. Okay, question. Is it wrong to asking other people to hold it it? You want someone else to witness you in all of your magic. And you have a hard time, even you, for you and not for them. I get confused about the management of energy regarding that and holding it in one place. When that stops being a struggle, the magnetism will be. Let's talk about it. So let's bring you up. Come stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger.

I just need to get out of my room, so one second.

No problem.

Everyone is sleeping. Okay.

I don't need to whisper. Dwayne. No. You're wearing headphones.

Okay.

Can you hear me or am I.

Muted still right now you are perfect.

Okay.

Perfect.

And I'm out.

Yeah.

Great.

Yeah.

I just heard you say to Sarah, you know like when you're just acknowledge the energy you're in right when you're. When you're writing it, are you doing it?

And I'll give you this as a cue. When you listen, your energy is very strong. It's when you go to express Yourself.

Sometimes that for you are you doing it for them. You need to be in the. In that mode of you disconnect fast.

So practice even just talking to yourself.

In front of giving and sharing. But I'm in this moment where I'm.

Like trying to the mirror or do do videos for you see how hard it is or how easy it is to stay focused.

Trying in the process of.

To keep the focus on the camera to look at yourself in your own eyes is stay grounded.

I'm trying to grow myself completely to put myself out there in a. In a complete different way that I've. Yeah like a shift. Career shift. If you want to say put it simply and I want to do it for me. You know like I. My motivation is that I just really want to live and do just things that are and feel right for me first. I. I have something to share. I want to first like yeah share that energy. But. But, but I wanted to do it for me and I was wondering if that's wrong.

You know me. The only way is for me, for you, for us and your energy. It's going to change everything. Everything.

I'm going to do it.

I feel it.

Like I did the photo shoot like you did.

If I do it and inside of me it's not right for me or I don't like it or I'm not regulator I'm not right but I do it for you did the photo shoot.

I did.

Let's go.

Thank you.

There's no us. And the key to absolute magnetic huge success is us. And there is no us without me. And if I do it for you.

For thank you to every one of you.

Thank you for being here and thank you for sharing.

Love my community.

Good. And I think you're going to see a very big first. It's so easy for me to forget me because you will always need something you or you or you or you or you or you. So I got to take care of me first because if I once I've taken care of me, then I can take care of as many people as I want. But if I take care of everybody else, as many as I want, then me may never come because there's just always going to be more people. So for me, for you, for us, it's. It's actually better that it starts with you. And so when you're writing a post and it's just like I hope people like it and I hope people see me and I wonder if people get it. It will never be your best post but when it's like, this is the greatest post I could have ever written and I hope people get it and I hope people see it. That's a different frequency because I made it as the best for me. I love it. I'm obsessed with this and I hope I have the current people in my audience that will get it. But if they don't, I will keep this post and I will continue to build my audience until the people that are in front of me me get what I'm writing. I'm not going to change what I'm writing. Difference in the community. When you show up as the people, as the person we expect to feel. Sometimes it doesn't matter that your name's above the post. If the energy in the words doesn't match what we expect, we don't. It's for me first even see it. What makes it invisible is not you. It's the energy of the.

So the energy that I'm putting into like where. Where I'm supposed to be.

It's like a post if the name that it says at the top doesn't match the energy in the words.

I'm just enjoying this for me. And then you know, like I have.

Whole post gets missed not because it was yours, but because the energy wasn't there. So remember that it's never you something.

To say, but it is just like a conversation with myself and then it. Something like this. Is that right?

Yeah.

Like when I look at my first versions of some of my posts that I put, they had like seven like likes and then I got them the year after and I revisited them a little bit and then they got 14 likes and then the year after they got 60 in the year after, 230 in the year after. A thousand. I can't. But it never. I never wrote it for them. I always wrote it because that's what I had to say. And I figured if I write what I have to say, the people who have to hear what I have to say are going to find me. But if I write what the people in front of me want, it gets dismissed. It's your energy and that's a. That's a gift, as you said. Yeah. Here then I'll only ever have the people in front of me. And is that really the right people? Especially not if I have to change what I want to say for them to hear it, then definitely not. So write what you.

You're right. It. There's. It's. It's.

It's tiny want to say. Then let the people Find you.

Yeah, I, I, I think I, I, I feel it. I don't, I don't necessarily get the words properly in my brain, but I feel it. This balance between the, for me, it's.

It'S, but it's, it's, it's, it's huge.

It's tiny, but it's huge. And that's usually how it is. Tony Robbins talks about a 1 millimeter shift. He says you hit the golf ball 1 millimeter off, it ends up in the woods. And that's what energetics is. It's a millimeter in your body for you, for us.

Like I, yeah, but thank you for clarifying.

Of course. Thank you. Thank you for asking. I think this is a very good question. Okay, let's see. Michael says, I almost feel like with the high ticket and buyer, we're co creating that peace and space that you're talking about. This is a realization that's been landing over time and it just went deeper today. And so why this is so interesting what you just said here. We're co creating that piece in space. We're co creating it. When you think about what happens, a lot of the time we, and it's an entirely different person in the world. So that's why we've got to focus on, so we've got to keep the focus so much on who we're being and notice when our energy leaks because the cleaner we are here, once it expands out, the safe the people who are creating massive spaces or massive companies or greater, it stays and, and it's not easy, but that's the actual work.

At least we have a safe place.

Yes, that's for sure. They're, they're very much so co creating. So when you think about the top designers, the top designer is designing the top suite at the top hotels, designing the top brand stores, the top florists are creating the top flower arrangements from the best flower suppliers for the best hotels. It is a co creation because eventually you start to build a network of people that light up the world on the same frequency as you and you'll find like energy people like, not just like minded but like energy where you're like, I know that we're gonna go skies and even the limit together and I know that your sky isn't even the limit is the same as mine. And so we co create properly together. I don't feel like I'm holding us up and I don't feel like you're holding us up. It feels equal power, but different. And that will feel Right. Until you calibrate to another place and then all of a sudden it feels like you're holding the ship and then you've got to walk away. Which doesn't always feel good.

Good.

But you'll find a new energetic match. The whoever does the flower arrangements for Super 8 hotels is not or thank you. Thank you. This is awesome. Okay I want to see Motel 6 is not the same person that does for the Hilton is not the same person that does for the the Four Seasons is what people said about this. This was a. This was beautiful and so helpful for everyone. Sarah. Thank you. Thank you. Great job, Sarah. We love you, Sarah. Thank you Sarah. So many hearts, so many love, so much, so powerful. It's not the same person that does for you know the Ritz is not. It's like there's a different energetic match and you've got to figure out what that matches and it wouldn't make sense to say oh well these people you might enjoy listening to guided yoga Nidra Non sleep deep rest that works the subconscious nervous system. I'm reminded of your question to me and my answer inside markup can do do the flower arrangements for Holiday Inn. So let's have them do it for the Ritz. It's like that's not the same energetic match though. They don't have the same vision. They don't have the same desire to. To. To wow. They don't have the same. They don't have the same thing. But Holiday Inn is a huge chain. There may be more Holiday Inns than Ritz's as far as locations and staffs and this and this and this and this. There's so many. It's a very valid brand. It just stands for incredibly place of how long it took me to write one of my posts post. Oh that's what I wanted to say to the group. I wrote a post today that, that shows up. That showed up on my. On my wall. If you haven't seen it it's a. The image is a teacup and you can ask Kevin how long it took me to refine that post. It was a post I had already written. I don't know how long it took me the first time I wrote it but it took me an hour and a half to refine it today. Different things. So you're going to find in your life you are co creating and the spaces where people are like energy same thing. There's a lot of co creation available because it's effortless. We serve the same people. So if for example if you have, if you're a coach or a mentor that mentors high net worth individuals that run their own companies and then you connect with Lindsay who is a matchmaker philanthropist and all of a sudden it's like you make an arrangement with her where she meets all of your clients and if they decide to do business with her, you two have a business arrangement together. That's the bit. That's the smartest idea in the world. Because the clients you serve are the clients she serves. And if on the same thing she's like, well, and because we're in an energetic match, I feel like you would be the mentor, the client, the person that I would want to give as a person to be the mentor to my clients. And so I. If you get in your head about it taking too long to write posts, I'm not a believer that the fast rich would love to be able to refer you. Do you have an affiliate thing? Because I feel like you would be the right person for me. Me, you have that ratio of professionalism to giving back that really works with my brand. And so can post is the best post. I will sometimes take a whole day to write a post and then not even. I love to refer you. You refer me. All of a sudden we've got a network going on here. Then let's say someone in post it and then look at it again tomorrow and then not even post it and then look at it another day and then post it. By the time I post it, I've spent seven hours on it. That happens. But by the time that happens, I'm like, I could write a whole program about this post. I've contemplated it and I've written it in the exact energetics it deserves. This great group has a world, a global flower business or in the area where Lindsay runs her company and all of a sudden she wants to send a flower arrangement to every client. Well, okay, I want that client to do the flower arrangement. Well, that client's looking for a coach and she happens to know that as well. And the coach needs flowers because they also send flowers to their clients. Now we've got a network going and this is how it happens. This is how networks get created. And people who are outside of them do get frustrated by that. And it feels difficult to infiltrate the network and it feels like they want to just get in the network work. But where most people go wrong is they want to bring no value and be part of the value. So value sees value. The real question is always how could I serve a circle like this if I first to be and just look at the comments of that post. It's not just like hearts, yay, beautiful. Feel like I'm a right match for it. And if you don't have an answer, you're not supposed to be a part of it. Stop trying to get invited and start trying to contemplate where your value is in that space. And when that's hard and it hits your ego, people are writing paragraphs like this is so exquisitely written. When are you writing, you go and you fear you're not good enough. That's when you've got to take care of yourself. That's where you've got to do the work to regulate a book. This. But that's the energetic match to I don't care how long it takes. What I care is that it's the right poke your nervous system because you've got something that's reminding you of being 12 years old and not being cool enough to sit at the cool table. And it's bringing back all the things when in fact it has nothing to do with that. You just haven't figured out how your value fits in the equation. So we need to need the maturity in order to co create because a co creation is an energetic match that supports each other for a win win situation. So just reminding yourself, who cares how long it takes? It doesn't matter how long it takes. What matters. So that's where the magic really lies. See, is that you got it the way you wanted it and that is very important now. This is what I love. And Michael, Michael brings this calibration the rooms that he's in. He starts snapping. People start start snapping and it's like. But some people will be there and be like, I can't snap. I'm not cool enough to snap. Michael snaps. I'm not cool enough. Then all of a sudden one person's like, I'm cool enough to snap. I'm snapping. And then you know who they're looking at when they're snapping. There's looking at Michael. They're like, Michael, I'm snapping for you. And he's all of a sudden the energy is crossing because it takes a moment where you decide, let's see, self sabotage. This is literally me. So Mary says when people are buying all at once, I'm like enough. I'm a match for that. That and it's not. I'm trying to look as cool as Michael is. I honor stop. But of course consciously I don't want that. But I see the Power, and I limit it. And that's huge. Michael. That's the best representation of how I feel right now. And I'm thankful for this guy. And so I'm looking for him in the chat so he knows I'm not copying him. I'm honoring him. Do you see me? And that's how it goes. That's how it goes. This is how people connect. That's. This is how they do it. And so there's this feeling of, like, power, of stillness and spaciousness. Priscilla, I've been trying to convince people how important it is to regulate their. Yes, I see you. I feel you. You get me. I get it. I'm connected. I'm part of this. And then there'll be. People are like, I can't snap. I'm not nervous system and processing emotions. But I don't need to convince people I desire to connect with the women that are cool enough. That's your decision. That's fine. Or you try to be cool and you want to snap and you snap in outside rooms and you don't snap here because it's Michael's thing and you feel guilty and you feel bad. There's all kinds of weird energetics. It goes in everything. It's business, it's life, it's relationships, it's body language. It's everything. So when we start to really notice these little quirks about ourselves, we notice where the energy lacks or the energy drops where we already know it and want to go deeper. I absolutely love that. Okay, question. Is it wrong to feel fear where we feel inadequate, where we feel not good enough, and when we start to bridge those gaps one at a time. Thank you. For you and not for them. I get confused about the management of energy regarding that. Let's talk about it. So let's bring you up. Start to shift that hyperspeed. And that's where things really, really work in our businesses and in our lives. Would you recommend refining the post and my actual energy? 100%? What I love to do. If there's a post I know I wrote in the incorrect energy, I sometimes I prefer to go away from it entirely and just start from scratch.

I just need to get out of my room. So one second.

No problem.

Everybody's sleeping. Okay.

When I'm no longer even near that post and it comes up like a year later, that's my favorite time to refine. A year later, a post comes up and I'm like, I forgot about this. Let me pass this through my body and see all the places where It's. That's when I usually do the best job at refining it. But if you feel like you've had a huge breakthrough and you want to give it a shot, I don't see why not.

Not.

I find the energetics of my modified repurposed posts. I don't need to whisper. Dwayne know you're wearing headphones.

Okay.

Fascinating. Me too. Write what you want to say and let them find you. Yes. I can see now where my blocks are in receiving clients because my energy is up and down from the intense shifts that I'm going through. How do you find the balance of receiving shifts and holding space for clients at the same time? M, I'm so happy your roses are still good, Sarah. Have to figure out who it was, which company I sent them with.

Dog, can you hear me or am I muted too?

Right now you are perfect.

Okay.

Perfect.

And I'm out.

Yeah, Great.

Yeah, I just heard you say I'll.

Put a little star next to them. They're still alive. They're still alive. What version of myself would I have to be so that the network is inevitable? Yes. As Michael says, I'm over here snapping. Yes, yes, yes. Okay, so this will be our last question for today that I want to address, and it's Jocelyn's question. So, Jocelyn, come on up.

To Sarah. You know, like when you're just acknowledged.

Hi.

Hi.

So let's look at this, like, up and down kind of energy. What's the fear? Is it that you're going to receive people up and down or is it that you're going to deliver the service up and down?

Down.

The up and down was going through breakthroughs. So last Wednesday, with the balance, the buyer and then an activation from Kristen, I had a huge upgrade.

The energy you're in, right? When you're, when you're writing it, are.

You doing it in crisis again? I got sick for like a week, but I worked through it faster because I talked to you last time about.

For you. Are you doing it for them? You need to be in the. In that, that mode of working through it.

And, you know, that's a natural process. But I go through these ways because I'm going through so many shifts this year that I'll be like, in alignment and then I'll go through a shift and it'll take me down. And how do I receive clients? Like maybe that, like, I don't know if this is a thing. The first year of building you becoming.

The giving and sharing, but I'm in this moment Where I'm like trying to, trying. In the process of.

Coach, do you not get as many clients because you're going through all of this?

I'm trying to grow myself completely, to put myself out there in a, in this.

That you can't hold space for them to come in. Because I could be sick again if I go through another massive upgrade or breakthrough in that aspect.

Right. So for coaching specifically, this can be an interesting thing because. Yes, that can be a thing. It can be like I'm, I'm prioritizing my growth and evolution. So your growth and evolution come second.

And complete different way that I've, Yeah, like a shift, career shift, if we want to say, put it simply, and I want to do it for me.

You know, like, so, so I've got to navigate that. It might mean the type of clients that come into your world are the kinds of clients that also go in and out, that you might need more flexible or shorter agreements. So that it's like, let me focus on my clients for a bit and then I'll focus on myself for a bit and I'll focus on my clients for a bit.

My motivation is that I just really want to live and do just things that are and feel right for me. First, I have something to share. I want to.

Or maybe it's flexible schedule where it's like, you tell me when you need a call and I'll let you know when I'm feeling up to it. And it's an. So it's an energetic match. It could be something like that. Or it's about testing yourself, like, yeah, share that energy.

But, but, but I wanted to.

And what I mean by that is when I did my first year of coaching, I, I worked when I was sick, I worked when I was not well. I worked through all of it. And what it showed my clients was resiliency. Like, people came into my world when they wanted to be shown they could do things no matter what. So I attracted that kind of client. So you're going to figure out do it for me.

And I was wondering if that's wrong.

You know, internally, what's the best for you. So that's one thing. The second thing is also like AFE is a, is a, is a university within itself. And I'm not saying that I don't think people should work with other people at the same time, but I, I will say that I don't me. The only way is for me, for you, for us, create the AFE expecting you to work with other people at the same time I already feel like I'm offering you a lot. If I do it and inside of me it's not right for me or I don't like and so I do feel like sometimes if you're choosing extracurricular that make it or I'm not regulator, I'm not right but I do it for you means you're doing, you're doing the full university program and you're taking extra tutoring, you may not have time for a full time job. That's a lot of times what happens when people do their education like the way I've built. There's no us. And the key to absolute magnetic huge success is afe. I know that anyone can do this in their business at the same time, but I can't say if you can do this and other stuff at the same time, then it's a different, a different story. So I would say on the, on the times where you're adding other coaching, maybe you're doing a little less in your business and that's okay. Or you're taking the risk that it might hit your business but it feels, if it feels okay and it feels aligned for you, you go for it. Or you say look, I'm really feeling called to this particular thing. I'll do one thing us and there is no us without me. And if I do it for you for less in a because it's really just, it's a buffet. And so if you said let me do one first, it's so easy for me to forget me because you will always need something you or you or you or you or you or anything less than AFE in order to exchange it for this one other thing and I'll do this thing later. That's also okay. So I've got to take care of me first because if I once I've taken care of me then I can take care of as many people as I want. But. But I think sometimes if you're going to say I want to do it all, then the energetic match to it all could be a short circuit. And if you're going to beat yourself up about that or if you just need a lot of rest about that is just the way you need to navigate it and there'll be an energetic match in your business. I did override this by being a no matter what, I don't know how healthy it was. I don't know if I take care of everybody else as many as I want, then me may never come because there's just always Going to be more people. So for me, for you, for us, it's, it's actually better that it's. Oh. But I definitely had a strong mind and I was like, I'm just unbreakable. Like that's what I decided. I was unbreakable. And I went at it that way and that was correct for me. I did experience nervous, nervous system disregulation. I also prioritized taking care of myself above all else. I, I just did what I had to do and I, I, I made it. So you've got to just be so strong for yourself and either starts with you. And so when you're writing a post and it's just like I hope people like it and I hope people see I need a break or either say I'm going through the storm and me and I wonder if people get it. It will never be your best post. But when it's like this is the greatest post I could have ever written and I hope people get it and I hope people see it, that's a different frequency because I made it as the best for me. I love it. I'm obsessed with this and I hope I have the current people in my audience that will get it. But if they don't, I will keep this post and I will continue. If my, if my boat ends up being cracked and there is a hole in the bottom by the time I hit the shore, I'll tend to it when I get there. But I am, I am going through this and I'm doing this. And you've got to know yourself and care about yourself enough to just check in often. Am I still good? Am I still good? Are these choices good for me? Am I all right? Am I all right? And that, that's the most important thing along this journey.

Thank you. That helps a lot because I do work through it. It's just I can't post through it.

I can't.

I can generate new business so I can support the people and then I try and relax, but I don't know if there's anything you might be able to pick up. But I try and relax, but I can't fully relax into it. Like I manifested a hotel stay but for whatever reason and I don't drink much, but I decided I wanted a dirty martini and then I had two and then I wasted the whole day. I mean, now I'm more sick, you know what I mean? But I think there's a self sabotage.

Or something new to build my audience until the people that are in front of me get what I'm writing. I'm not going to change what I'm writing there.

And then I'm working and I'll. I'll do the work. And then I'm like, okay, now.

It'S for me. First.

I need to rest now I need to pick up my son from school and then take care of my mom. And then.

So the energy that I'm putting into, like, where. Where I'm supposed to be is like.

The rest of the day. But then in my mind, I keep thinking, but successful people, you know, work. Because I know you said, how much do you want it? How much are you willing to put in? So then I'm like, okay, well, maybe I just need to do one more thing today.

But then I'm just enjoying this for me. And then, you know, like, I have.

And when I don't, I'm resting, but I'm kind of half resting.

Something to say, but it is just like a conversation with myself. And then it. Something like this. Is that right?

So this. There's no shame in this. I just. I'm sharing this because it's the truth. I never drink if I have a dysregulated nervous system. Like, any kind of alcohol or drugs. If you're not feeling solid is a bad idea, because that's not resting. That's partying. And it's cool to party. There's no. There's no amount of party. No amount of partying is unreasonable. In this paradigm, we're allowed to party, but when you're wobbly and you party.

Yeah.

Like, when I look at my first versions of some of my posts that I put, they had like seven likes, and then I got them the year after and I revisited them a little. It's not the same thing. So for me, I have a glass of champagne in celebration of feeling good and solid already. It's not the thing I'll do when I need a moment to myself. That's when I have Epsom salts and chamomile tea and green juices and ginger shots and, you know, sit by the river and meditate and listen to 741 hertz. Like, we're in a very different vibe than champagne. Champagne is, I'm solid and I'm cheersing. And then they got 14 likes, and then the year after they got 60 and the year after 230. And if not, it's more restful stuff. So what I would look at is, am I currently year after a thousand? I can't. But it never. I never wrote it for them. I always regulating myself, or am I taking a moment to enjoy my wrote it? Because that's what I had to say. And I figured if I write what I have to say, those are two different contexts for your care and they'll have a different result. Because if you had gone to this hotel not for rest, but for celebration, two dirty martinis in, you'd be doing the moonwalk and you'd be talking about how great it is to be able to let your hair look loose. But because deep down you knew what you needed was recalibration, it feel like it stole that from you because it actually put you in a little more of a wobble. But you, you will sometimes learn that on the fly. These are lessons we learn as we go so you don't beat yourself up. You're just like, ah, just learned a lesson there. There's a different energy for different libations, different, different reasons for different beverages. And I've got to, I've got to know where my body's at when I'm making that choice. The people who have to hear what I have to say are going to find me.

Me.

But if I write what the people in front of me want to hear, then I'll only ever have the people in front of me. And is that really the right people?

Yeah.

That makes a lot of sense.

Thank you so much.

Of course. And I know this is what we were saying at the beginning of the call, like sometimes it's all about the perfect scenario. That sounds so great. I needed rest, so I went to a hotel, I ordered myself a dirty martini. It sounds good. It's Pinterest. Perfect. Perfect. It, it's, it's great. It shows up perfect. It's great. But energetically, it was all, especially not if I have to change what I want to say for them to hear it, then definitely not. So write what you want to say, then let the people find you off. What you needed was barefoot in the sand. What you needed was body in the ocean, floating. What you needed was coconut water and sunshine.

I, I, I think I, I feel it. I don't, I don't necessarily get the words and oops.

So, so even though it sounds good, that's why I said, you know, bubble bath in the middle of the afternoon doesn't give you the vibes. If you're in the bath stressed, it's gotta actually nail the vibration of calm. If it's not nailing the vibration properly.

In my brain, but I feel it, this balance between that for me that.

You'Re looking for, it's not the right thing and you're going to find your select things that actually really do the job. Like for me, meditation isn't always available. But I feel for you, for us.

Like I. Yeah, but thank you for clarifying.

Of course feel in a meditative state when I take photos. So a lot of times people will look at my photographs and be like, gosh, this picture, just this picture is so beautiful. I'm like, yeah, I took it in one of my meditations states. Like I was in the. I was in the moment of bliss. Thank you. Thank you for asking. I think this is a very good question. Okay, let's see. In Beauty for my Life and I took the shot and so the whole energy I was in transferred into the photo. But if someone told me oh I don't meditate, I take pictures, that's kind of weird. But I found that's one of the things for me. Zooming into the details, looking at the beauty, capturing the perfect light. Michael says, I almost feel like with the high ticket and box we're co creating, getting that shot that's meditative to me somehow. So find the things that actually that peace and space that you're talking about, this is a realization that's been landing over time and it just went deeper make you feel that it may not be the mainstream trendy thing everybody's doing. You might need to think outside the box a little bit.

One question on the the deep relaxation and also the finding the balance with the work. What would your schedule look like when you have a certain amount of hours? Do you like just say okay at a certain time I'm just going to cut it off and then take care of the family stuff or like how do you not feel guilty in the.

Process of not working? We will talk about this further in the program because a big reason today and so why this is so interesting what you just said here. We're co creating that peace in space. We're co creating it. When you think about what happens a lot of the time with people sabotage their growth, especially with high level stuff is because of guilt. And there's a a bunch of reasons for this. But before we go there, I want you to find your happy places first. Because if you don't have the happy places, the next part of the work doesn't land this if the people who are creating massive spaces or massive companies are same way. But that's the exact right question that comes next next. So what I'm going to have you Guys do now in this little space that you have for yourself tonight, tomorrow morning, just they're, they're very much so co creating. So when you think about the top, find something that puts you in a state of bliss. Even just shut your phone off, actually shut it off and see how that feels. Even if it's just for 10 minutes. And notice that designers, the top designer is designing the top suite at the top hotels. Designing the top, it's often no one can reach you. And think about that. It's a good feeling. Brand stores, the top florists are creating the top flower arrangements from the best flower suppliers for the best hotels. It is a co creation because eventually you start to build a network of people that light up the world on the same frequency as you. And you'll find like be present with your unreachability, see how that feels. Just play with energetics that make you feel solid. Solid. And then we'll build from that on the upcoming calls because we want regulated buyers because people who buy when they're disregulated want refunds and ends up being the worst clients. And so the best way to get a solid client is to be a solid person that's selling. This is why this is all even more important. So let's continue from, let's start from this point and then we'll build on the next calls. Thank you so much for your presence. Thank you for your vulnerability. For those of you who shared this was like the perfect thing. Thank you all so much and we will see you very, very soon. Energy people like, not just like minded but like energy where you're like, I know that we're going to go sky isn't even the limit together. And I know that your sky isn't even the limit is the same as mine.

And so we copy Sam.

Create properly together. I don't feel like I'm holding us up and I don't feel like you're holding us up. It feels equal power, but different. And that will feel right until you calibrate to another place. And then all of a sudden it feels, feels like you're holding the ship and then you've got to walk away, which doesn't always feel good, but you'll find a new energetic match. The whoever does the flower arrangements for Super 8 hotels is not. Or for Motel 6 is not the same person that does for the Hilton is not the same person that does for the. The Four Seasons is not the same person that does for, you know, the Ritz is not. It's like There's a different energetic match and you've got to figure out what that matches. And it wouldn't make sense to say, oh well these people can do, do the flower arrangements for Holiday Inn so let's have them do it for the Ritz. It's like that's not the same energetic match though. They don't have the same vision, they don't have the same desire to, to, to wow. They don't have the same, they don't have the same thing. But Holiday Inn is a huge chain. There may be more Holiday Inns than Ritz's as far as locations and staffs and this and this and this and this. There's so many. It's a very valid brand. It just stands for incredibly different things things. So you're going to find in your life you are co creating and the spaces where people are like energy, same thing. There's a lot of co creation available because it's effortless. We serve the same people. So if, for example, if you have, if you're a coach or a mentor that mentors high net worth individuals that run their own companies and then you connect with Lindsay who is a matchmaker philanthropist and all of a sudden it's like you make an arrangement with her where she meets all of your clients and if they decide to do business with her, you two have a business arrangement together. That's the bit. That's the smartest idea in the world because the clients you serve are the clients she serves. And if on the same thing she's like, well, and because we're in an energetic match, I feel like you would be the mentor, the client, the person that I would want to give as a person to be the mentor to my clients. And so I would love to be able to refer you. Do you have an affiliate thing? Because I feel like you would be the right person for me. You have that ratio of professionalism to giving back that really works with my brand. And so I love to refer you. You refer me. All of a sudden we've got a network going on here. Then let's say someone in, in this group has a world, a global flower business or in the area where Lindsay runs her company and all of a sudden she wants to send a flower arrangement to every client client. Well, okay, I want that client to do the flower arrangement. Well, that client's looking for a coach and she happens to know that as well. And the coach needs flowers because they also send flowers to their clients. Now we've got a network going and this is how it happens. This is how networks get created. And people who are outside of them do get frustrated by that. And it feels difficult to infiltrate the network. And it feels like they want to just get in the network. But where most people go wrong is they want to bring no value and be part of the value. Value. So value sees value. The real question is always how could I serve a circle like this if I feel like I'm a right match for it? And if you don't have an answer, you're not supposed to be a part of it. Stop trying to get invited and start trying to contemplate where your value is in that space. And when that's hard and it hits your ego and you fear you're not good enough, that's when you've got to take care of yourself. That's where you've got to do the work to regulate your nervous system. Because you've got something that's reminding you of being 12 years old and not being cool enough to sit at the cool table. And it's bringing back all the things when in fact it has nothing to do with that. You just haven't figured out how your value fits in the equation. So we need the maturity in order to co create. Because a co creation is an energetic match that supports each other for a win win situation. So that's where the magic really lies.

See.