The Mentor - Day 10

Sam, I am a business artist and I have people become wildly successful at their own craft. We are revolutionizing entrepreneurship. Foreign beings of the mentor program. So happy to see you. Today is going to be a fun topic and we're also going to get some live mentorship on today's call as well.

Just fun.

So today our topic is. No, today's not the last call.

It's not going to work for me.

Today we're going to talk about expanding your ability to feel. We're going to talk about holding relationships. We're going to talk about evidence, evidence and mentorship and why it's so important to reframe this part of our mindset. And so when we first start in business, there's like, this is what I have found, right? So I'm giving you, like, my deepest soul discoveries of like, cracking all the codes and breaking down all the boundaries in this industry. There's like the typical laws of business that people look at when it's like marketing, advertising, all that kind of stuff, social media. And then there's things that are like energetics, which means beyond the strategy, beyond the plan, beyond what makes sense, beyond all of it. There's this other thing, and this is beyond evidence, and it's a world beyond evidence. This is. This is like, we kind of prefaced this a little bit before in different modules where the majority of the people are, where there's the most. You know, there's an average where the most people are. And so we base all we believe is possible and not possible based on that average. And so what's so powerful about becoming a mentor is we're playing in a field that's very different than the average field. We're playing above that because the whole goal is to create new pathways that people want to walk with us on new pathways beyond what's predictable. And so the thing is, why so many people play in that typical range is because there's so much evidence there. Evidence of what works and evidence of what doesn't work. But there is a lot of it. And so that becomes like the most realistic place. Place to live. You live where there's the most evidence of survival. You live where there's the most evidence of what works and what doesn't work. You live where there's the most evidence. Now we're going to talk about a world beyond evidence. And this is a scary little world, but there's magic that grows here. Because what we're basically doing is we're now saying, I'm playing in the field beyond Evidence because it's my job to create it. And we're reminding ourselves of that constantly. It's not like I need evidence in order to believe. It's I know there's no evidence. That's why I believe I am the one. That's why I'm playing here, because there is no evidence. The whole goal is to discover what hasn't yet been discovered. So I can't discover what has yet to be discovered in a place that's already been discovered. So we've got to have a lot of self reliance in this space, the mentorship space. We're operating beyond evidence, we're operating where we are the one that's going to invent it, create it, discover it. And so the faith and the trust is the only roadmap. You have faith, you have trust. You go discover, you find out what there is to see. You course correct. There is no path. I am the path. There is no evidence. I am the evidence. There is nothing but what I create. There is nothing but what I pave. So a lot of times we only do the things we have, evidence for success. We say, but I can't have this because I've never done that. Yes, that's what discovery looks like. I can't do that. No one's ever done that before.

That's what discovery looks like.

I am searching my current database for evidence and I can't find anything. Therefore I cannot discover anything new.

That doesn't make sense.

You're either discovering things that are new or you're going where everyone has gone before, one or the other. But where we get all mind warped is we're like, I would like to discover a brand new thing that everyone has already known and has already existed. But I will discover it and I will call it my own. But it already exists. Yes. So it's not your discovery. But it is. But it's not. But it is. But it's not. But it is. But it's not. Well, how do I discover a new thing, go where nothing's been invented yet? But I have no evidence that there's something to discover there.

I know.

Oh well, maybe I don't want to do that. So it's our job to discover our abilities to discover. How brave are you? How determined are you when it looks like you're going on a discovery and there's nothing to discover, when it looks like you've hit a dead zone, when it looks like nothing is going the way you were supposed to have it work, when there's no evidence and nothing to excite you and no one to pave a path for you. Can you still keep walking? It's a very hard thing to do. But with the right storyline and with the right reason, then you're the one that's discovering. So of course, there's no evidence. So the thing with mentorship is you're operating in a world without evidence because you've never done it. And even if someone has done something very similar to what you want, they won't do it exactly the way you. You're going to do it. They won't do it with your background, they won't do it with your storyline, they won't do it in your. On your timing. They won't do it like you, they'll do it different. And so that's two different ways of making one same thing happen, which is two different discoveries. Your way of doing something is unique and different just because it's you. So the first path is learning your own way in mentorship. That's going to take you everywhere. And it completely changes the angle of, like, competition, because a person could literally hire two mentors that do the exact same thing just to see the. The two paths. They could say, oh, you did that and you did the exact same thing. Perfect. I want to purchase both of your coaching packages so I can see how you did it and how you did it and see which one resonates most with me or if I want to do a hybrid or what. So the crazy thing is, at this level, there's no competition. You could, you could literally want it all. You could say, I have taken every single program about confidence from every mentor that offers confidence programs. I have taken every single relationship from every leader in relationships. I have taken every money program from every leader in money in order to create my vision so there's no competition there, where you create your own unique place, but you've got to create your own unique thing. And for that there has to be so much faith. And it's hard to have faith because there's no evidence, but that's what faith is. If you had evidence, you wouldn't need faith, you would have evidence. So a lot of business models are evidence based. Show me proof. Show me evidence. Show me for sure that you can and then I'll believe you. Whereas the mentorship is like, do you believe? Do you believe? And how do you. How do you act when you believe? And can you believe even when the circumstances aren't on your side? And do you figure out how to help other people? Calibrate to that belief through your belief? And do you continue to. To go to places you've never gone before, or do you do it once and then tell the story about the one time you believed and try to sell that for the rest of your career, or are constantly paving new walks? Always. Now, one of the greatest things that I have changed in my belief systems that I think is the sole, honestly, the sole reason that I am in the position that I am, is I believe in love without evidence. I believe profoundly the people who love me love me even when I don't have evidence. If I have created a relationship with someone, I believe that that relationship lasts forever. That is my belief. Even though we may not have time to message each other every day, even though I may not be the one that responds to my Instagram stories, even though we haven't seen each other even before, I love without evidence. I have clients that I've walked with for a year that I haven't maybe spoken to in a year, but the love hasn't changed. And I still have clients. One of my clients, Viola, just had her second baby. I haven't spoken to her since 2020, but she just had her second baby and she messaged me to tell me she just had her second baby. When my client Ashay bought her house, she messaged me to tell me, by the way, that guy I was kind of seeing when we ended things, it's work. It's it, it's it, it's him. And I just bought a house. I believe in love without evidence. And I think I've had to. I started my life with having to believe in love without evidence because a lot of the people I loved weren't physically near me. My grandma, who was the most important person in my life, apart from my. My mom and dad lived in England. And I had to believe that she loved me whether she was there or not. And we didn't call each other every day. Phone calls to England cost a fortune. I couldn't call her, I couldn't see her. But I had to know that she loved me without evidence. And my aunt and my cousins, my aunt Cheryl, my uncle Andy, my cousins Alex, James and Ellie, lived in England and we couldn't talk to them all the time. Cost fortune. And we only saw each other every few years. But every time we saw each other, it was as if we'd never left each other because we learned to love without evidence. Then in my proximity to people, I became very evidence based, especially in romantic relationships. What have you done for me? Lately, how do I know for sure that you love me? Because lately you've been a little distracted. Because lately you've been doing this. Because lately there's been this. Lately there's been that evidence deciding whether I was loved or not. And my mind loved to look for reasons I wasn't good enough, not pretty enough, not successful enough for people to love or respect me. And so evidence based love is a very pressure filled love and it only works with a very small circle of people. You can only have evidence based love with people where you have enough energy to show evidence that feels very restrictive. So when I think of you, only know that I love you. As long as we have lunch together once a week or once a month and I respond to all your text messages, there is an energetic match for how many people that I can prove that I love. And love isn't based on love anymore. It's based on proving love, which is a very different thing. There is a very different energy between I love you and I can prove to you that I love you. There's not a lot of capacity for proving love, but there's a lot of capacity for love. And so when I stopped needing people to prove to me that they loved me, I started receiving love a lot easier. Whenever someone said, oh my gosh, I love you, I thought, I believe you, your word is enough. Instead of what I used to think, which was, you love me. Okay, prove it. No, prove it. You love me. I accept you love me. I believe you. You feel like you love me in this moment. That's enough for me. And people were able to be received in their love with very little effort, which created a trust. Like I told this person, I love them and I know that they believed me. That is a rare thing in this world. We have to prove our love to everybody. You don't call me back enough, you don't text me enough, you don't, you never comment on my stuff, you never support me. You've never done this, you've never done that. Calculating love based on evidence is not love. Love and trust. Love and trust. Love and trust. Love and trust. And so that kind of bled into social media because eventually what would happen is I would talk to a client on a coaching call and I would say, like, at that time I knew how many likes I had on my post. I could see every person who had liked it. You have 13 likes. You better know I know exactly who liked it. You have two comments. I know who. So when I get on the phone with my client, I'M like, I wrote a post and I think you'd really enjoy it. And they said, yes. I read it and I loved it. And I went and looked at my 13 comments and there was no comment from, you know, no likes from them, no comments from there. I'm like, she loved it. Without evidence, can I make this transferable? Can I believe that people love my work without evidence? Can I believe that people see my work without evidence? Can I believe that every person I connect with for real, that actually has a feeling of love for me in that moment, it counts? Without evidence, without the likes on the Internet, without needing to personally speak to every person in my inbox, can I believe in love without evidence? Can I just create more love? More love, more love. And if I believe in love without evidence, then I also believe that people can feel love for me without evidence. Meaning I can actually say, I remember you, I know you, I've seen you. I love your energy. And you can believe that from me. And that was also hard because I've also had a lot of people ask me to prove it. You say you love me, but I don't feel like you love me as much as you love your other friends. You love me, but I don't think you love me as much as your other employees. You love me, but I don't think you love me as much as your other cousins. You love me, but I don't think you love me as much as your other followers. I don't think you love me as much you do, but prove it, which I was not available for, but also I'm not available for it because it shows me how much faith people have. How much faith do you have in love? When you come in a group like this and you immediately imagine that no one likes you, how much faith do.

You have in love?

It's like, unless the entire group made you the priority, you wouldn't be able to believe it. That shows me how far you are in your mentorship. You've got to believe in love without evidence. Impossibility without evidence, in success without evidence, in money without evidence. If you're going to change the world because we have no evidence of a better one yet. And if we can't act in alignment with a world that works before the world works, we will not see a better one. Only people who can love without evidence, act without evidence and lead without evidence and manifest without evidence are actually the ones that are changing the world. Everyone else is responding to the change that's already in motion. So a mentor does not respond to change in motion. A mentor creates change. A coach responds to change in motion. So how we know the difference between when we're teaching something or whether we're literally paving the path for something is how much trust and belief was necessary in order to create it. I literally live on faith and love and celebration and gratitude. The field of energetics, I've realized, has no limits because it's not based on what I believe in, it's based on what's possible and that the sky isn't even the limit. There is no limit to what could be, but there's a limit to what's predictable. There's a limit to what's been done. So if I'm always basing myself based on that, I get stuck. So I had to enter this industry, an industry that already existed. And this is something I just want to. I know a lot of you all know this and I'm going to say. And you'd be like, well, yeah, of course. But for a lot of people, you'll be like, ah, right. I came into this industry, an industry that already existed, and I paved a path that made no sense. All the people that were there were there. How did I create this path? Because evidence shows that the people who are already in place are already in place. And everyone that comes in after comes in after. Everyone that comes in after gets less because we came in after. It doesn't matter when we come in, when we operate without evidence. But if we operate based on evidence, that means we're waiting for everyone who's been there before to tell us where our place is. They don't know because what we're discovering is something they don't know yet. No one can tell us. I can't tell you where you're going because if you truly are a mentor, you're going to pave a path I can't imagine without evidence. So every time you doubt yourself, you stepped out of your mentor role. Every time you go based on what's predictable, you've stepped out of your mentor role. Every time you look at the evidence and make any kind of assessment based on the evidence, you've stepped out of your mentor role. There's nothing wrong with that because you're also a CEO and you're also a coach, potentially. But just know that the mentor is the visionary. And the more visionary work I do, the more unpredictable, unrealistic, and extraordinary the results I produce are. Because they're trailblazer results, not predictable business statistic results. Sometimes it feels safe for a minute to Be a CEO and say just for a minute, can we just plan a master class and say that based on if there's this many people, probably there'll be this many people and we can expect this much amount month please. Because that feels really good for my nervous system. You can do that as much as you want. But then you cannot beat yourself up when you haven't had a quantum leap in months. Then you can't beat yourself up when you watch other people skyrocket. And you're like, why? Because you chose comfort and there is far less growth in comfort and there is not much comfort in growth. So you got to pick cozy are growing and you can sometimes sit, it just slows down the growth and you can hyper speed the growth. That just takes away some of your comfort. You're going to find your limits. And depending on how strong that trailblazer identity is and how strong that visionary identity is, you may be more in the discomfort and growth versus the other. And if you feel more like, yes, this is the journey of my lifetime, except I want to walk completely in alignment with my nervous system and never go beyond what's feel safe, that's perfect. Also there's just an energetic match to that and it's not making it right or wrong or good or bad and it's playing with the energetics and learning to stretch yourself. The more you love without evidence, the more you trust without evidence, the more you believe without evidence, the more you celebrate, the more, the more, the more, the more, the more you operate in the field of magic, the more magic you create, the more you operate in the field of logic, the more logic you create. And there's nothing wrong with either one of them. You're going to find out what you love, you're going to find out your ratio. But that's why in this world there's very little point comparing yourself because the thing is what you're doing is the current energetic match for your nervous system that you want and it could change and you could, you could have more success and you could break the mold of like this is how much certainty and how much, you know, visionary angle there is for a different kind of result. You could break the mold in that. It's just that if you're seeing like I'm really attached to this amount of comfort and this is the result I'm getting, that's okay. Sometimes we don't feel like going all in. Sometimes we don't feel like putting it all on the line. Sometimes it feels good to just breathe and Lean back, you get to do that. This isn't about. The only reason you become successful is if you're constantly in overdrive mode. But you will see that a lot of the people who are doing the wild and crazy things, they're in overdrive mode a little bit. It's just that they're enjoying it and it feels good and they're excited in this moment. And it could be that it slows down or it could be that their nervous system calibrates and it becomes normal. And that's why I talk about normalizing big money in the hands of women. Because right now it's still not normal. It feels very hyper. And the reason I know it's very hyper is because it creates hype. Hype meaning there's so many people in the world that are just talking about it because it's trendy instead of talking about it because it's their sole mission. When something becomes trendy, when there's hype around it, a lot of times there's an inflation bubble, there's like a. Something's going to pop. And then the people who are so, so, so in alignment with their spirit to talk about this certain thing will remain and the other people will change direction. Often they pivot 180 degrees and fight against the very thing they were saying. You'll see very, very soon we're going to see. A lot of people say, I don't ever want to talk about money again as long as I live. I am so done with people who talk about money. The whole industry is going to pivot, except for the people who were meant to speak about this from their soul. And then something else will change. The trend will be trauma informed and everyone will be trauma informed until people rebel against it and are like, this is too much to think about. I can't be myself. And only the people who were meant to lead this as soul work will stay and the other ones will pivot in another direction. Then it'll become about relationships until people are like, I am so sick of being told that unless I'm in a relationship, I'm not worthy or whatever. And it'll be, the single ladies rule the world. And they'll be sick of it. And there'll be a new paradigm, except for the people who had their sole mission to talk about relationships. And this is kind of how it happens. When there's a trend, there is a bubble. And so we're constantly pivoting in this industry. We're constantly leaning into new topics and seeing what's what's working, what's not working, what's leading me, what's pulling me, what's pushing me, what's igniting me, what's there to talk about? And do I change my mind? And is this my soul mission, or is this just something that made that I had an opinion on? Sometimes you'll realize there's things you have an opinion on, but it's not your sole mission, and eventually get sick of talking about the things you just have an opinion on. It's like, this is not what I was meant for. This is just the thing that I. This is just the thing I have an opinion on. Because everybody's talking about it. I don't want to talk about this anymore. There's something else I want to talk about. And you may make things mainstream that no one's even talking about yet. You may create a whole other industry. We don't even know what's coming. We don't even know what's coming. But what's the most important what I found is that in order to build community, because a lot of people are drawn to me because of my community and because of the genuine love and connection that is in the industry, in this particular segment of the industry, people ask all the time, like, how do you create so much connection? I believe in love without evidence, and I give love without evidence. Like, I don't need. I don't think that unless I've done something for you, you won't believe I love you. I believe that you see I'm made of love. Like, I believe that you feel it. And if you don't, then probably no matter what I do, it would never be enough anyway. Because I could do something for you for a few weeks and you'd feel love for me. And as soon as I wouldn't have space for it anymore, you'd imagine that I don't. And it would be that fast and that easy for you to fall out of love with me. And so sustainable love is love without evidence. I love you until evidence of the opposite. Like, if I am acting against love, then there's a reason to say, okay, this person doesn't love me. But can you imagine what kind of world we'd live in if we just accepted love as a mainstream belief system? Like, the love is there unless we're going against it. The connection is there unless we're going against it. And so in my world, I really present myself everywhere I go as though love is already in the room, as though connection is already in the room. And the people who are available to calibrate to love without evidence, they do. The ones who are like, I feel it from you, and I have that. And it feels really freeing to just get to love you as much as I want and to receive love from you as much as you want. It doesn't have to add any more time to my life that I basically don't have. I just want to be able to love freely without evidence. And so mentorship is very much about that. Sometimes I only have three months with a client. If I can't love them fast, we're running out of time. I love you for your spirit. I love you for your heart. I love you for your wisdom. I love you for your vision. I love you for your family. I love you for what you've built, what you want to build. I love you for your story. I love you for your humanness, your humanity, your womanhood. I love you for who you are. I love you. I love you for that. And I don't. I don't need to show you evidence of that, and you don't need evidence of that if you believe in it. And the more you believe in it, the easier it is for you to calibrate to love and to expand. And in mentorship, what I have really found is above and beyond all else. If we don't feel loved by the people who are supporting us, the. The advice doesn't land. If we don't feel love for the person that we're supporting, it doesn't land. And so love without evidence, belief without evidence, as much as humanly possible, believing that you can be friends with 10,000 people because you're not enemies. That if we had an opportunity to hang out for a weekend, it would be the greatest weekend of all time. That's the kind of potentiality that I like, is to say, I already know that I love you. And I already know that if there was an opportunity for me to spend a weekend with you would be the greatest weekend ever. I know that if we went to lunch, we wouldn't shut up the whole time. I know that. I know that we're an energetic match. If you made it here, there's no question. We would talk and talk and talk, and they would be like, have you guys ordered yet? And we wouldn't have even looked at the menu. And then you'd say to me, I can't believe I don't look at the menu. I always look at the menu. Usually I sit at a restaurant. I'm starving. I'd be like, Me too. How we not look at the menu. We should order something and then we talk about something else. The waiter would come back, have you ordered yet? And be like, oh, my gosh, what is happening? We haven't ordered yet. We're going to order now. We would talk and talk and talk and talk and talk until the whole restaurant was shutting down. Then we'd be like, oh, my gosh, it went so fast. That's how it would happen. And because I know that in my soul, when I speak to you, you get the best of me. And so can you let yourself get excited for people you barely know? Can you let yourself actually feel deep love and joy for people who are celebrating things and you've never even met them before? Can you let yourself actually feel sad for someone who's going through something really hard and. And just give them real love? You don't have to hurt for them, but you can love them through their hurt just because that's where the connection occurs at hyperspeed. That's where the things happen fast. If you need to know for sure that someone loves you and you need to have absolute evidence that they love you before you love them back. Everything takes time. It takes so much time. We need to build a relationship before. I care about you is very different than I care about you. And it would take a lot to break us. We live in a fragile world where everybody needs to prove everything. I love the fact that we can just be our best and support each other for that. And really, you know, I asked at the beginning of this program to speak out about who is it that you want me to see you as? Who are we listening to you as? What is that? That version of you that has created the life, the legacy that you want and let us relate to you that way. I want to just look at you for that. I don't. It's not about what you struggle with today. It's about what you're building. And if I can believe in that version of you without evidence, together we will go everywhere. But if I'm constantly asking you to prove it, constantly second guessing you, constantly only looking at how far you've come to decide whether I believe how far you can go, There is no mentorship. Mentorship is in the trust. It's in the path that we cannot see. And so just believing in people because it serves you to believe in them doesn't have the same connection. A lot of people say to me, I believe in my clients. I so believe in my clients. Do you? Or does it Serve you to believe in them, because then you don't feel bad about receiving their money. Do you believe in them and love them? Or do you believe in them because it serves you to believe in them? There's a next level to all of this. And so, so often people say, you know, I. I've been doing it. I do the things. I did the live stream, I did the masterclass. But how much did you connect to the people? I mean, I connected with them. I did it. They liked it. But how much did you feel them? But what do you mean? Like, did you feel a connection? Did you feel. Did you get it? Did you feel something during the masterclass? I mean, I was good. It was a really good one. I can already tell. So I had this client. She was with me for three months. I was hoping she would, you know, resign, and she didn't. And, like, I just don't know. So, like, what's. What was the connection level? Like, what was it like? Why did you expect that she would? And why does it matter? I see client coaches being mad at their clients when they don't continue. That's not love without evidence. That's. I only believe that you love me as a mentor as long as you pay me. That's not love without evidence. I believe that every woman I've walked with will remember me forever. Because why would I take that away from her? Why would I have to make her prove to me that we still have a relationship for the rest of time in order to believe that there's still something there for us? Both of us lose in that. In the perfection of a relationship that lasts forever. All there is is trust and love without evidence. So that's the most beautiful thing. You love without evidence, and then the evidence comes, Then you love even more. Because it's like, I loved you before, and now I'm knowing you, and I freaking love you even more. Of course there's more. There's more connection when we're spending time together. But is spending time together what love is? Because if that's the case, then my grandma didn't love me at all because she only spent a tiny little piece of time with me. And I. I don't believe that. I believe that we loved each other without evidence. And so this is the thing I'd love for you to practice in your life and notice where you keep yourself at arm's length from your people just in case they don't love you. Your friends, your family, your partner, your clients, your followers. You're afraid you're going to bother them. You're afraid they don't actually love you. You're afraid of all these things because you don't have enough evidence. But what if you didn't need evidence? What if you were the one that believed in all of it? Without evidence? What if you showed up with your heart wide open without evidence? And then here's the fear. Believe me, I know the fear. But what if they actually don't? And then what if my heart gets broken? And then what if? Then you will heal. And the thing with the heart is the way you strengthen it. It's a muscle. You strengthen it like every other muscle. You grow it till it tears. You let it heal. You grow it till it tears. You let it heal. That is the muscle of the heart. It takes a lot of heart to be a mentor and a lot of trust. You hear so often people who double cross their mentors. So you could fear that your entire career or you could live without evidence. If you need to test every person that comes into your world, you will have a very different career path. You will heal from every heartbreak. I promise you that. Every single thing you try and fail and it hurts, you will heal from that stronger. And in hindsight you'll think, I don't think I could be the person I am today without that heartbreak. Mentorship is like that. The coaching world can be a business. It can be matter of fact. You can grow a coaching business based on facts and training and certifications. You can learn someone else's model. You can just copy paste. Not mentorship. Mentorship is based on how much you can hold, how much fear you can hold, how much love you can hold, how much joy you can hold, how much gratitude you can hold, how much can you hold without. And that's the journey of a lifetime. How much disappointment can you hold? How much pain can you hold? How much sadness can you hold? How much anger can you hold, how much resentment can you hold, how much of it can you hold? And lead yourself through it like a mentor. Because that in turn becomes your greatest teaching. That becomes a calibration portal. And so I want to open this invitation for you to learn to believe more in the things that you can't see because you're creating them. And to really tell yourself it's normal that I don't have evidence. I'm in the process of building it. There is no evidence for this because I haven't built it yet. There will be evidence once I've made it, once I've done it, there will be Evidence. And there are so many things in my life that I have been told and same thing. You know, yesterday, we're having conversations, Tara, same thing. Mentors saying, you're never gonna do that. People are gonna tell you, you're never gonna do that. You're gonna do it. And not just that. You're gonna become an energetic match for people who love without evidence. When you love without evidence, people who need evidence are an energetic match for people who need evidence, because it's tit for tat. I did this for you on Monday. You did this for me on Wednesday. This week, we both have evidence of love. Yay. I did for this for you on Thursday. You did this for me on Sunday. We both have evidence of love. Yay. I did this for you on Monday. You did this for me on Friday. We both have evidence of love. Yay. And you can only do that with as many people as you can hold to show evidence to. Then there's the other people who are like, I love you. I know. You know who else? I love her.

Really? I've never heard of her.

You're gonna love her. I will. Yes. What's her name? Oh, my gosh. You're right. I love her. If you love her, though, you know who else you love?

Her?

I've never even heard of her.

Who is she? Her. Oh, my gosh. Oh, I love her. You know who else? You know who you'll love? Her. I know her. I love her. You love her. I love her. That's. That's the simplicity of this. And then the more you spend time together, the more you realize, no, like, you don't understand. I love her. Like, I don't just love her. Like, I love this person. Like, you don't even understand. Like, this person is next level. And then the more you speak kindly of these people to other people, the more they love that person without even hanging out with that person. And we're compounding love at hyperspeed. This is how we go fast, because we only go as fast as our nervous system can handle. And it's all based on how much trust we can feel. If it takes you six months to trust a person, there's a speed you're going to build your business. Six months to trust your mentor. Six months to trust the women in the mastermind you're a part of. Six months to trust your clients. Six months to trust that a new client is the right fit for you. Six months to trust that a follower is good. Six months. This is long. If you just trust that you're an energetic match for love without evidence, and that people who are an energetic match for love without evidence are going to find you, and you will spend the rest of time building evidence. But you don't need it to start loving. It's just something that happens. Then you love more. If you believe in that, hyperspeed starts to occur, and then you can hold more and hold more and hold more and hold more and hold more and hold more people. Because it's not the love that's restricted, it's the energy to show evidence. That's what takes up all our energy. So this is the practice. Really notice in your life where if there's no evidence, you doubt immediately. The minute you're not in the center of attention, the minute the person that you love didn't say hi or didn't notice you, the minute something happens and you feel like, oh, I didn't feel love in that moment, it must mean I'm not. Notice that with your family, with your friends, with your clients, with your mentors, notice where you take yourself out of love, just in case. Because we wouldn't want to look silly thinking people love us when they don't. But how fragile is our love if all it takes is. Doesn't look like you love me today, didn't feel like you loved me today. And the thing is, when we feel so much love for us, when we feel so much love from others, when we feel like we love so many people, it's less fragile. It's like there's a huge chain, a huge bond. There's so many. There's so much love, you can't run out of it. But when you put all the pressure on one person to love you, right? Any mistake can break it all. So really it's that the more we love, the more we're loved, the easier it is to love. The easier it is to love. Less pressure on it, more trust in it. And then people feel like they can just be themselves and that's enough. And it gets better. How great is that? Instead of there's a bunch of hoops you've got to jump through before you even accept it, and then what? And that's a huge piece of the puzzle. Like, the love for you. Like, how much evidence do you need to love yourself? How rich do you need to be before you love you? How skinny do you need to be before you love you? How married do you need to be? Like, how advanced do you need to be? How. How intelligent, how loved, how known do you need to be before you're going to love you, how much evidence that you're good enough are you going to need? Or can you just decide today and spend the rest of your life loving yourself more? But just like, I love me, I love me because I'm great. I love people and I'm funny and I'm cute and I'm excited about a beautiful life, and I love the people around me. And I'm a work in progress. But I love me. And it's going to be the journey of my life. How much lighter would that be? So the more hoops you give yourself to jump through, obviously you're going to give people similar hoops. Let's make it easier to fall in love. We get less sick of it and tired of it and less. I don't think I want to do that. We believe. Much more fun. So I am bringing on today Jen, who is like, talk about love. I have fallen in love with this woman. Like, I can't even tell you. And I think we tell each other, we love each other at least twice a day, every day. And she's just. Just. I think you're gonna love her, too. And so when she has a moment, she's here.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm literally over here. Like, as you're talking about love, I'm just going back to how much I love you over and over and over.

I love you over and over and over. This is one of the great things. Like, Jen has been in my world. She was a year in unity. And then we did. We're now in our private coaching container. But Jenna always is very vocal about love. Like, when she finds someone that she loves, she's like, okay, I love you. Like, that's it. It just happened. It was fabulous. And I'm going to tell you, I'm going to remind you every day. And her journey was pretty fast and exponential. Also with, like, leading with that. Love is a magnet. There's just something about it. So. And I feel like you're going to feel it. Like, how'd you already feel it? Look at her. I just love love.

That's what Pat and I always say. We're just. I just love love. So let's just love more. Let's just do that.

I love.

So good to be here. Thank you for asking me to be here. Hi, everyone. Okay, so Lenny and I have been having conversations in Voxer. And then she was like, let's pop this in. In. In this program.

So all.

Thank you, guys. So we've been doing life together since last Year since last, what, January, February. And there's been so many shifts over the gosh, what, like four or five months in my world. Or like really since you. And I started private coaching in February. And so it's like navigating these shifts in what's happening in my life. But also it's like this redefinition of who it is that I am. Like, I've always just claimed I'm a business mentor, right? I help people with business, right? Like, so it's just a very simple term. I'm a business mentor. But when I was in Voxer, was that yesterday? I was like, I don't know if I'm. I said something. And then you were like, well, maybe you're not a business mentor. And I was standing outside and I was like, oh shit, what if not a business mentor? Because what you were talking about earlier was like this soul passion. And my soul passion is really rooted in money and abundance, in changing our external reality because of our internal world and accessing the quantum and bringing it back down to life. And like, that's my passion. Like, my passion isn't strategy because I believe that when you are in alignment and when you are magnetic as ever before, and when you truly listen to your soul calling, you are the strategy. And any strategy works. And like, this is what I do in my business, this is what I do in my life. And so when you said that of like, maybe you're not a business mentor, I'm like, oh, oh, that's a beautiful gut punch that you just gave me. So I'm in this space right now where I've gone through Melanie and I had a one on one call a couple weeks ago where it's like, sometimes things are easy. And I, and I last year, my life was very easy. Making money was. Things were just very easy. And when I asked for my next level and things have been starting to get like murky and like, like that. I can't describe it with words, right?

Like this.

And it's like, I know that it's like this because there are things in my business and not my life right now that are in, that are not 110% in alignment. And so it's like this conversation around this redefinition, we could say, right or not even. Yeah, redefinition. And then sharpening the messaging of that definition to really feel what it is that I do in life and business.

So I've actually been feeling into this since that discussion because I knew you were going to be coming on Today and I had this thought, and I think that this is going to be good for a lot of people because, you know, in the coach program, we were saying how you can define a niche, but it's very difficult to define yourself as a person. Like, what am I? So it's like, you can be a business coach, you can have a business coaching program. You can work with one client that you help with business coaching, but mentorship is who you are, not what you do. And so are you a business mentor? Is that who you are? Or are you more of like a mentor for ascension in whatever area it is? Or like money? A money mentor, you know, like a wealth mentor. And it's not about what the business is doing. It's about a person's energetic match to money. Is it a manifestation mentor, or is it just like, I'm a mentor? I also do some business coaching. Some this coaching, some that coaching, some that coaching. But what I am is a mentor. And so I feel like where we sometimes get stuck is trying to define the mentorship, the coaching we can define. We can say this is a business coaching program, this is relationship coaching program. This is a social media coaching program. When it comes to mentorship, it's like, well, it depends what. What we're focusing on.

Yeah. And that's exactly how I've been feeling. And I've been trying to, like, put words to it or, like, create content around it. And then I'm like, this can't be said. Like, the work that I do with my clients I get literally cannot be explained. It can only be felt and it can only be experienced. And so it's then going back to, like, Impact Academy and, like, putting it out into the world. I'm like, what do I even. What? And like, I'm like, what do I do with my hands? You know, what is this? Like, what is this? Right? And, like, the word. I know that I was briefly talking about this of, like, the word richness, like, redefining rich. Because, like, wealth and money and abundance, like, yeah, I feel that to my bones. But when I say the word like, rich of, like, how rich of a life can we live? And the richer that we are in life, the richer that we become with money. And so I feel like this huge, like, sharpening and redefining of who I am is, like, centered around this word, like, this richness of life. And then it's like, does that all. Does that encompass it all?

Well, I think of a bio, which is often like, where we try to define ourselves is because of those freaking bios that we get in our head. Because really, if not bios. Exactly right. So what it is, really is if you were to say, like, like I'm a mentor for women who desire to build seven figure businesses in alignment with their spirit. I redefine riches.

Ooh, good thing this is recorded because I'm not writing this down.

But you see, like, that doesn't put you in a box, but it talks about who you work with. I'm a mentor who works with women building seven figure businesses from a place of full life alignment. And I'm redefining what a rich life is. And that's a full bio. The rest occurs in your posts. The rest occurs in your lives. The rest occurs in your programs. The rest occurs in your client testimonials. The rest occurs in everything else that you've got to say. But it's like, I'm a mentor for this kind of person and this is kind of the body of work I'm working on right now.

I like that. That made me feel like, like that made me feel really excited.

Like that's the change. That's the other great thing because literally I could say I'm, you know, I'm a business. Let's say I'm a mentor for female entrepreneurs and, you know, I, I own like the art of business. That would give people a vibe. They'd be like, okay, so it's about business, it's about women, it's about entrepreneurs. I get it. If I said, you know, I am a mentor for female entrepreneurs and I teach women, I would have another frequency. Oh, I'm noticing. I think I froze you. Did I back?

Yeah, I thought it was me and then everybody went like this at the same time.

It was me. Yeah, we still are having choppy wi fi in crazy weather here. But anyway, so, yeah, let's say, for example, I'm saying I work with women who want to feel like magic on legs in their life. Well, I'm still a mentor. I'm still helping seven figure entrepreneurs. But now instead of it focusing on the art of business, I'm focusing on magic on legs. I can change the focus based on the programs I'm selling, based on the season of my life. I don't need to redefine myself. I just pivot the direction of my mentorship. And I think that's where a lot of us lose a lot of energies in that stop and go course, correct, change, start over. Instead of building, refining, you know, just pivoting, steering in a different direction. For a season. Steering back. Like, that bio can change as often as possible. Really? Yeah.

Yeah. But, like, when you said. Because, right, it's the bio. It's written words on an Instagram platform, right? Yeah, but when you said that, like, like, the buzzing that it made me feel within me, and I know you and I have had conversations of, like. Like, holding a context for your work that's so much greater than you. So that you rise into. Like, when you were like, I decided that elf of femme was gonna be something that I rose into. Like, when you just said that of, like, in. When the richness of life keeps coming to me, it, like, it really does set this context. Like, every morning I wake up and I look at Pat and I was like, how can we feel richer in our lives today? Right? Like, it allows me a bigger context to, like, rise into, because that's what it is. Like, I don't want to feel like, okay, well, like, I built a seven figure empire. And, like, now I'm going to teach, like, the coach, right? Like, now I'm going to teach you.

How to do the same.

Like, that evolution and that growth and that expansion into, like, our max potential is what drives me. And, like, that support, like, that that's here and drives me. Like, how can we become more rich? More rich, more rich and everything.

That's. That's what you've literally defined. Mentor versus coach coaches. I did this even, like, I did this once, and I'm going to. And you can too. And here's my seven steps, and the mentor is like, I am constantly developing this concept. That's the overarching context for my entire life. And if you walk with me, you'll calibrate to this vibe. And that's why there's not enough mentors you can have. Because if this one's calibrating and setting that calibration portal, and the other one's setting this one, the other one. Sell it. Doing this one, it's like, as many women as you want to walk with, you can because everyone gives you something. And so there's no competition. It's just like, everyone coming together and bringing this one unique spice. And people are cooking all of their lives. And this. This season of my life needs this. This spice, and this season of my life needs this spice. And we're all doing the work. And the greater we are at widening, deepening, strengthening that context, we're creating longevity in our brand. And that. That's the magic.

This feels so good.

Yay.

So good. I feel like you And I have had so many conversations over the past month. And, like, this is like the. Everything has come to a head. And it's like. It's like we were packing the dynamite. We were, like, shoving the stuff in the firecracker, and then now we just lit it. Now it's like, okay, now we're done.

Good. I love it. So now, and this is the great thing with mentorship. It's like, you change your problem, you change your life, because once you've dealt with the thing that's been taking up all of your brain capacity. Yeah. You're like, well, now I've got to come up with something else to desire and somewhere else to pivot. And sometimes we hold on to program to problems longer than we need them because at least it means we're working on something. We keep ourselves busy with the same problem over and over again. Sometimes we're afraid of calibrating past the current problem. Like, what will I do once I figure this out? Who am I without this problem? Yeah. So it's good to move through problems fast so we don't get so attached to them that the problem becomes part of my identity. How many people do have I met in my life? They're like, oh, I'm trying to write this book. You know, this, like, trying to be author. It becomes part of their identity until writing the book would change their identity, and then it's hard. So we want to move through your problems relatively quickly so they don't become a part of your identity.

Yeah. So good. And we just closed, like, my voice emoji yesterday. Like, so many problems in my external life have been. The loops have been closed.

So.

So here we go.

Here we go. Here we go. Oh, thank you.

I love you.

Thank you. I love you. All right. And then if we have. If Tara is here and she has something, I'm happy to have you on Tara as well as the last conversation, if you're still here and if you have something. If not, I'm going to be posting in the group what we're adding to this because there's more. More. There's most definitely more to this program.

I'm here.

Hi. Hi.

Hi.

Hi, Hi. Hi.

Oh, my gosh. So much goodness. Like, so much goodness. And Jen, I see you. It's like next level conversation about Rich and just redefining that is what I think. Oh, my gosh. So excited for you. So you can feel the energy. My intention is to bring forward the celebration and the gratitude for what occurred yesterday and this shift and just you know, with spirit's assistance, ride into the. More with all of you, all of us together. Because yesterday, getting everything that you're talking about, about the feeling of this love, it wasn't maybe for my ego. There was, like, some evidence that was like, oh, my ego, like, feels good. But really the reflection of this love continuing to pour in from so many of you. Messages that some of you sent me that just said, I love you. And me sitting there yesterday, focusing, like, I can. I can expand my capacity to receive more. Like, as the messages kept coming in, feeling this in my body and watching any kind of default to, like, brace myself as to, okay, this is enough love, like, just continuing, letting it roll in. And when you're saying this, if we can allow ourselves to embody the love without evidence, what I kept hearing today was how often I'll speak for myself, how often I've done that with God, with spirit, like, okay, you love me.

Prove it.

And this unraveling of. Hold on a minute. What is the opportunity to walk through life with that knowing, how is that going to shift that deep, deep trust in life that we're being. That I'm also feeling like I'm being loved through it all. And yesterday I got a text from my photographer, and he didn't leave a message, so I thought, oh, I immediately went to. Was everything okay? And then he wrote me and he said, I just want to expand your capacity for joy. And I was like, what? He's like, what's been happening in your life and where you are? This is just. Your pictures are here, and I think they're going to be in Vogue. And my body was like, I just had this conversation. This is happening More, more. Can I. Can I honor it? Can I allow it? Can I receive it? Can I detach from any kind of. Like, I was talking about yesterday, the old pairing of the grease, good and bad.

Immediately, immediately.

Right? All of that. So I'm breathing through it. I'm sharing it with my boys. My son's 18, and I'm telling him. So the amazingness kept flooding, kept flooding. And then this morning, my mom came in my office. My dad's been very, very sick for, like, three years with a diagnosis. That's. We thought. My mom came in my office this morning and she said, we went to the doctor at Duke yesterday. They misdiagnosed your dad. He's going to be okay. And, you know, the. This has been going on for years. Years, years, years. So many top doctors, and this not evidence. This can I receive? And even if he wasn't okay to know that it was going to be okay. But for me to, like, miracle status like, this.

This is.

This is. This, this is. This is. Can it. Can you keep. Can we keep. Can I keep allowing the more. The goodness, the unraveling of it all. And yes, we can. And yes, we're safe in all of it. And yet. And yes, I'm loved. We're loved. All of us are loved through it. And to me, that is the shift into mentorship. You know, that is the path that is undiscovered. It is walking that way consistently. So that is really what I want to share. I want to share that. Thank you. And so much came through yesterday with, like, oh, how many mentors have said things that I interpreted because I respect them that I didn't want to outgrow? And how. How often have I unintentionally limited. So I did do an Instagram live immediately, just speaking to that and unraveling that. And the path is this fashion line and the connection between this beauty from a personal perspective and a fashion line perspective, because we got offered after our first fashion show to be on fashion TV with millions and millions and millions. And I energetically was too afraid of the visibility. So it's a yes to loving fully all the way without evidence. Yeah, that's where I'm at.

I'm obsessed. This is so good.

I just want to share.

Like, thank you for that. That is so good. I love you. Oh, my gosh, this is so good. Like, this is so good. And what I love about this chair so much is, is watching you do that, watching you share this with me. It's so cool to watch. This is why I think this program so cool is because people are watching other people than them go through things that they're going through, and they're like, oh, my gosh, I'm watching this in real time. And, like, this is so me. Yeah. But, like, when you say so many people are reaching out to you and, you know, it's like, I love you. I love you. And it's like, for what, though? Like, for why. But why? And. And. And is it okay for me to accept this? And is it okay? And, like, how many more people are gonna say this to me? Like, at what point is it wrong to just believe it? Should I believe it? Is this real? Like, like, all of this stuff happens to us at a certain point, so we sometimes think we're blocking things in life because we're not good enough. It's not about that. It's because we're not able to hold it.

Yep.

It's like at a point you're just like, no, I don't believe it. No, I don't believe it. And so if you don't believe in the money, you don't believe in the love, you don't believe in the possibility, you don't believe in the miracle, then you'll have a life where it's as much as you can believe, which means you live a life where evidence leads the context. Whereas when you live a life without evidence, there is no limit. It's like, whatever life is going to put on my path, I am going to believe in it. And if it breaks my heart, I am going to learn to hold that. Because I would rather live an entire life believing what is possible and being shocked once in a while than believing an entire life what is not possible and being shocked once in a while. I am so excited for you. It is out of this world. Thank you for this. Thank you for coming in with that. That's awesome.

Thank you all. So much gratitude.

Okay, so I'm gonna just look at you all. We're not done. There's more things. We're so not done. There's more things. I'm having so much fun, this program, so stay tuned. I'm gonna write it in the group. I'm even gonna write an email to you so you'll be able to see all the details of what's coming next. There's gonna be more. This is too much fun. Can't let go, Won't let go. It's too much fun. So thank you for being here with me. I love you. You're beautiful. You smell nice. You're amazing. And. And stay tuned for more information from me. Bye, Sa.

I am a business artist and I.

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