Walk & Talk 3: Follow These Simple Steps and You'll Have a Hell of a Week #93

After all, all art is experience. And we're back, we're back, not quite in the forest, not quite in the forest, but you know, there is a car coming, uh, an immediate car, immediate, as luck would have it. I know, turning in, that's great. Um, and this is the format which is fast becoming fan favorite among our listeners, it seems to be. So we've got to give the people what they want. So we are—

what do they want, George?

They want the walk and talk. So here we are walking and talking. Which is very exciting. And we are talking about quite an exciting topic, I think. And you know, it was quite a late in the day decision.

Yes.

On what we were gonna be discussing. We were talking about various steps that you can take in order to have a hell of a week.

Yeah, I was really looking forward to this. I'm worried because at one level this might look a bit flaky, but I think it's so important and I think we've got a bit of a recipe.

Yeah, and I'm excited to dive into that recipe. And I think to kick off, it might be good to sort of determine what the goal is. So what's the, what is a hell of a week? What does that look like? What do we mean when we say, you know, if you follow, if you follow these steps, you're going to have a hell of a week? What exactly are we trying to define here?

What a great question. Look, the world is completely upside down, and I think since like COVID and the different wars and Brexit, it's, people have become really tribal more than ever. And I've got a bit of an experiment to kind of piece people back together again.

All right, nice.

That's what it is. So, but I, I was worried because it could sound a bit flaky, but I've been experimenting myself and I kind of do this naturally anyway.

Yeah.

And I've had one hell of a week, even though I had technically had a really bad week. I had an amazing week last week.

Okay, well, maybe we can talk about how and why that happened and what these, what these steps are and what these sort of techniques are. I've got a series of questions here, but I think actually I might go off list. Oh, hello. And sort of just, you know, begin by just asking you sort of, you know, what are some of the, how do you frame your mind firstly in order to have a hell of a week? What's the setup?

Well, the framework— I think you might need to go back to your questions, but the framework is kill people with kindness, right? And, um, and the rest of it emanates from there. But the, the principle is that you decide what kind of day you're going to have. Well, you know, when you wake up in the morning, it's a decision, and it's up to you to decide if you can have a good day.

Yeah.

And, and not let things affect you. But then if you follow on from that, I think you can transfer that feeling to other people without them even knowing.

Great.

It's a bit like if you smile at someone.

Yeah.

They smile back unless if you do it on the train, you get arrested. But in principle, you can transfer a smile and get it back. Have you ever done it?

I'm not a very smiley person, so no. I should have done.

You are a smiley person, George. You're smiling right now.

I am.

Yeah, that's true.

And we managed to turn there as well. We turned.

It was almost like, you know, clockwork.

We are pros at this now. We are so good at this. And so I guess what people will be wondering, especially our audience, is how does this translate to a business?, you know, angle, you know, how does this, how does this attitude and this energy work when it comes to the office environment or to managing? Is it applicable in that scenario?

Yeah, you know what, it is, but I didn't want to start there because it is, it's applicable in everyday life. But I think if I start without thinking about business, because not everything's about business, sure, then people will naturally understand how it helps you in business. Yeah, but I've got a very old example of this. I don't know if you've ever been to IKEA where you have to follow the yellow brick road. Oh yeah. Whatever way you try and get off it, you end up in the restaurant having Swedish meatballs. Have you been there before?

I have indeed. Yeah, I love it.

And this is how I learned this. And I went to get my Swedish meatballs. Yeah. And the lady serving was obviously having a very bad day.

Yeah.

And it's annoying to try and cheer people up when they don't want to be cheered up, but I did it anyway. And so everyone has a name badge these days, so it was very easy to connect with the young lady. And I just kind of thought, you know what, I'm just gonna have a happy day. And I said, how are you doing today? You look like you're having a great day. Anyway, in the end she gave me, instead of the 8 meat Swedish meatballs, I got 15. Oh, hello. Now I'm not doing it for that reason, but yeah, I managed to sort of cheer someone up. I got extra meatballs as a result, but that wasn't the reason.

What was the reason?

I just wanted— I don't like people to be grumpy. Yeah. And I think actually, um, we don't know what's going on in people's lives, right? They might have some terrible things going on, or might not enjoy their jobs, or just might be just having a— was it a resting bitch face that people have?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Whatever reason, I just think that if I can brighten people's lives up a bit, and I've noted— and this is part of my experiment for last week— yeah, uh, they— I can make someone else feel good, but I feel really good as well.

Okay, I guess there's a bit of a danger of sort of, you know, cheer up, it might never happen, you know, sort of being a little bit, uh, I don't know, as you say, trying to cheer up someone who doesn't really want to be cheered up. How do you strike that balance? And what's this, you know, are you saying just be open to these experiences and these opportunities?

Yeah, well, to be honest, my experiment was not to overthink it and just to be nice to everybody. Right. And from doing— and literally every person I met, if they had a name badge, I called them by their name and I say, hi George, how's your day going so far? And just make it natural. I wasn't like over the top, like a game show host.

Yeah.

But I just wanted to, yeah, I'd upped a notch from my normal positivity, just a little bit. And if you're an introvert, just a little bit. No, you don't go— don't be crazy. Sure. But literally, for the last 2 weeks, actually, every person I've met, wherever I've met them, yeah, I've gone out of my way to be slightly more cheerful and be interested in them.

Okay. And was this a sort of conscious thing? You woke up one morning and you thought, you know what, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do this for the next week, or I'm gonna see what happens if I try this?

Well, I'll be honest, I actually do this anyway.

Yeah.

But I, you know, it's like everyone has things going on in their lives. I had a few things in my life, so I thought the best— I'm going to cheer myself up by cheering up other people, and I'm not going to let things get to me. So I just want to just see if I can maintain that but also affect other people.

Yeah.

And I've just noticed how there's so few people take care of other people because we're all tribal. Yeah. That it— and people really appreciated me just reaching out. And, you know, and I did get a lot of free stuff, but I didn't do it for that. Sure. I just did it because I thought it was a nice thing to do, and I just feel better about it.

And this is what you're suggesting that other people do?

Yeah, I'd say for the next 7 days, make a conscious effort to everyone you meet— I know this is going to sound a bit fluffy, but you know I'm not a fluffy guy. No, literally everyone you meet.

Yeah, we're turning.

Oh, sorry, I showed that on the video. I wasn't supposed to do that. Supposed to be transparent. We're turning, we're turning.

We're just humans.

We're only humans. Yeah, you did that so nicely, George. Um, every single person you meet just if they've got a name badge, just call them by their name. It's obvious, but it's easy, right?

Yeah.

And just say something simple like, oh, how's your day going so far? I say things like to people if I go into Pret a Manger or somewhere, I go, are you the boss? Yeah. You're so good at this.

Oh, nice.

Or thank you, that was a great cappuccino.

Yeah.

It's very hard to make a flat white. Well done, that's really good. Just say something that's not, you know, don't be false.

Yeah.

I'm not being fake, but recognize like some people do some really tough jobs or menial tasks or very clever things. And whatever they do, just compliment them on it. And just for a week, do this and watch the reaction of people and how appreciative they are, because no one ever takes any interest in them. But more importantly, look, notice how you feel at the end of every day.

I like that a lot. And I know, you know, knowing you as I do, I know that is part of your DNA. For some people, it's probably not. You know, we're sort of talking about positive energy here. Is there a way of cultivating it if it doesn't come naturally? Is it doing these things that you've mentioned, you know, uh, you know, recognizing people's difficult jobs. Are there any other sort of tricks or, and sort of hints that you can give in order for people to cultivate that sense of positive energy?

Yeah, I think it's a good question because I, I do— it is a natural thing to me, but the only reason it's a natural thing is that I do it a lot. And if you want to create a habit, you need to do something for 30 days and then it becomes a habit, good or bad. So if you're not— if it's not natural for you and it's a bit awkward, just do it anyway.

Yeah.

And by the end of the week you'll just be doing it all the time. Do it with your kids, do it with your family, do it with people you don't even like. Yeah, kill people with kindness, and over time it will be more comfortable for you. But I appreciate at the beginning you won't, but that's okay, do it anyway. You'll feel so good for doing it.

And sort of what role do you think openness, in terms of sort of like emotionally, how does that, how does that come into play when it comes to shaping our week? You know, is this a sort of, you know, you can be very closed off to this stuff, can't you? You know, is there a sense, or is there a case for being a lot more open to these things? And the more that you do it, the more stuff like this will happen.

Yeah, when you said openness, I was wondering if you were talking about the conversation, like, should you say, look, hey, you look a bit scruffy.

Yeah, what hard truths.

How's your day going today, Mr. Scruff? You didn't mean open like that, did you? No, I didn't.

No, I don't think that'll go the way that you wanted to go.

As in being open to doing it. I think you It just needs to be on your radar. It's like, you know, we talk a lot about networking. It's not a natural thing to do, but if you do it a lot, it becomes a habit, and therefore you're open to it. And I think, you know, we're going to do another episode on people controlling their lives and their careers, and this is a step. Yeah, because it's not an obvious thing to do or a natural thing, and some people listening may think, well, that's a bit fluffy. Absolutely isn't. I think you should— your mind should be open. Your mind is like a parachute, it only works when it's open. A t-shirt moment. I love that.

Yeah. Do you just have these sort of stored up?

They're all in my bald head.

Yes. No, I love it. And I think we have to talk about this from a professional perspective at some point.

Yeah, we can do it. I wasn't avoiding it. I just wanted to kind of land it first.

Yeah, because I mean, I guess this, the principle is the same in that it trickles, you know, if you're up and you're upbeat and positive, that trickles through into your team, into how they're feeling and how their week goes. And again, reflects back on you.

Yeah, it does. And again, you know, we have to balance life out. Like, if you're a manager and you've got a team, it doesn't mean you have to be nice to everyone all the time or be fluffy with them, because sometimes you need to be harder or you need to chastise someone. So it's not about that. But if you, if you genuinely show an interest in people, yeah, then it will become natural because you'll get to know them better. And you can help— if you're a manager, for example, the best way to help your team is to know them well enough to know what makes them tick. Yeah. And maybe find out some of their challenges that are going on in their real world. Okay, and maybe you can, you know, give them some encouragement. So it doesn't always have to be happy, happy, happy, right?

Because that can be a little bit, as you said.

But I do think in every walk of life, because it could be a customer or someone, you know, not obvious in your customer base, maybe someone that's more junior that you've come across, or someone in the team that's a peer of yours, or, you know, a lower level to you. It doesn't matter. Just everyone's the same. Everyone's a human, right? Yeah. It's not more important because they've got a more important title. That's for sure.

And as you said, you know, for all intents and purposes, you should have potentially had quite a tough week, or, you know, last week, for example, or whenever, and you've managed to turn it into a hell of a week. So it sort of goes to show.

I've had a hell of a week. You know, I think that's the thing. It's like, and I do genuinely believe this, when, you know, you decide the kind of day you have when you wake up in the morning. I know I said it earlier, but it's in your control, and a lot of people will blame other forces or other people or I can't believe this is happening to me. But the truth is there's no one sitting in a room. Yeah. Plotting and planning your demise. Sure. So therefore it has to be up to you to decide what kind of day you have. And so the way to revive my energy when I was not in my perfect form was to try and go and help some other people.

Yeah, that's great. And I think, uh, you know, I've seen the, the positiveness in you. Is there a sort of routine or a morning mantra or something that you have that sort of can get you, sort of snap you into that frame of mind ready for the day or the week ahead?

It's funny, I was doing some training recently and I was, I show a little picture of someone like lying out of bed, so looking like they're not having a great day. Yeah. And then I show Muhammad Ali where he looks in the mirror and he goes, I am the greatest. So I definitely don't wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and go, I am the greatest, or I am But I do consciously decide to have a good day.

So that does actually cross your mind?

I think about it. Yeah, I do. I think about it. And when people say they're having a bad day, I say, well, it's not right, it's flippant to say, well, have a good day. Yeah, because there's so many things going on in people's lives that some things won't— you won't have a good day. Obviously there's some serious things in life, but yeah, again, you have to choose, choose what happens and and how you deal with it. It's not what you do, it's how you deal with it and how you respond to it that counts, I think.

Yeah, I see. So, you know, we're all going to face adversity and difficult things. It's how you respond to it.

Yeah, I'm not saying you should gloss over bad things. It's not what I'm saying really. It's just how you— is it gonna, you know, is it gonna run you over? Will you get bitter or you get better? I don't know. It's just like how you deal with it. Yeah. Because the problem's still there. Yeah, yeah. So you might as well deal with it in a better way. Otherwise you don't have a great time with it.

No, that is— it's quite inspiring to hear, to hear it. And it's, again, with a lot of these things, it's stuff that we all innately know, we just don't put into, into practice. And as you say, if we were to do something, if we were to do this for 30 days or for 2 weeks, it's going to really make it— really make a difference to our lives.

Absolutely.

Is there a sort of an underrated action that we can take to lift others up? You know, we're talking a lot about, um, how, you know, you found sort of happiness and positivity by helping others. Is there a sort of an underrated thing or something that people may not realize or know about?

Yeah, I think, you know, if I— and I think we might have spoken this on the last podcast, but, you know, people have got more excitement from someone saying well done or giving a text message, or in the olden days sending them an email or whatever. Yeah. And, and so it doesn't cost much or anything to just remember something. So if, for example, remembers people's birthdays, or if someone told you that they were going somewhere for the weekend, send them a message and say, yeah, hope that you have a great weekend. Maybe the end of the week, if you've got someone who's been doing some hard work, wouldn't you say thanks for all your help this week? You know, it doesn't take much to, to reach out. Yeah. You've got different media.

Yeah.

You just need to be more thoughtful and think about other people. We should not think about ourselves all the time, but think about someone else.

Yeah. Nice. You're a man of stories, and I wonder if there's a story or there's a moment from your career that you can look back on that really sort of showcased this power of positivity?

Do you mean as in something I received or something I have done myself?

Well, I think either.

I've got a story where it backfired. I think I might as well tell you that one.

Yeah, let's start with that.

So there was a— I used to have a team in multiple countries and there was one particular guy in Switzerland who'd done a really good job doing, working really hard. Yeah. And he'd gone away. And so I got hold of his number through one of the managers that worked for me. And I was gonna call him up to say, thank you so much for all your hard work. And this is part of the issue, right? Because it's not natural. Yeah. He thought I was phoning to fire him. He's on his holiday, the boss is calling, he's like, this is not good. Yeah. So that's when it backfired. I went, no, no, François, honestly, I'm just calling to say you did such a great job.

And he goes, oh, thank you.

Relief. I think he fell off the mountain he was climbing at the time. So it did backfire, but sorry, I've avoided your question.

You have, nicely.

Yeah, I guess one of the things that happened to me, I think maybe I'll share this, is that when I was a younger manager, I thought it was really cool not to go on holiday.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm far too important to go away on holiday. I can't take time. I mean, the business would not survive without me. And my boss at the time kept on saying, this is not right. This is not good. It doesn't make you a better manager. In fact, you're worse because you're not sharpening your axe. Yeah. And so he made me go on holiday. And he paid for me to go. Oh, right.

I know. That's pretty good.

But he said to me, look, you can work out France. So there's a, um, like a camp. I can't remember what it's called now. It's gone from my head. And he paid for that. He said, but after that, go into the office in France. But yeah, I'm gonna pay for that. I want you to take it because you need to take some time out. You've been working hard, but you know, it's affecting your performance by not doing it. And that really stuck with me. It made me very loyal. I'm not saying you should go and pay for your staff's holidays. Yeah. But he took action. It wasn't like, yeah, you should go away, it's really important. He just made me go away and paid for it. It wasn't expensive, which was amazing.

And that made a difference to you and your efficacy?

Well, it did. And it gave— so I was already loyal, but made me really loyal. And we're really good friends still.

Yeah.

It was just a moment. It doesn't have to be something expensive, but someone taking the care. And he genuinely was worried about my health.

Yeah.

Okay.

So he obviously took an interest, a personal interest in you.

Really, it was a genuine one.

You know? Yeah. And sort of linking that back to, to the work world, you know, in your experience, what is that link between being upbeat and being effective in business? As we sort of draw this episode to a close, how do we link those two?

There's a lot of happy stats, actually. It's actually been proven that people are happy at work are 65% more effective than people are not. And when we're talking about it now, Sounds bloody obvious. Yeah. But if it's bloody obvious, why don't people do something about it? Because I genuinely believe, and again, I'm not talking about, you know, hugging trees and everyone holding hands at work, but genuinely, you know, people care about purpose and they care about being recognized more than anything. And if you can take the time to understand where people are coming from. Yeah. And take the step that you were saying before. It makes people happy at work and they'll be more productive. If you've got someone who's unhappy at work, they're just gonna, they're not gonna be productive. Everyone knows this. Yeah. Right.

Come on. Yeah. Come on, people.

Do something with this. It's obvious, right?

So a final question for you, and this is for people who have listened to this and sort of either want a summary of what we've been saying.

Call AI, they'll tell you.

An AI summary. Or you know, if there is anything you can add to it. If listeners could do one thing this week to make it one hell of a good one.

Yeah, that's a great one. I'd like to end with this because I want to end with this challenge. So those of you are listening, and if you're watching, hi, please do— I'm going to stop now for dramatic pause. Oh wow, okay, let's set up for dramatic pause. The barrel roll around George camera. I'm looking at you, the person listening. Take this week, this is my challenge to you, go and just for the one week, every single person you speak to, just be extra happy and ask them about them. If they've got a name badge, call them by their name and just say, how are you today? And try and find something to make their day slightly better. My final example was I went to Devon, went to the sandwich shop. The ladies there were working really, really hard. And I said, you guys, you must be working so hard. I bet you don't make sandwiches when you get home. No, I said, you made a really great sandwich. And they said, thank you very much. And I got the biggest sandwich you've ever seen. Wow. So here's my challenge. All week, every person you meet, just for 7 days, watch first of all how they react and how you make someone's day better and be genuine. And then by the end of the week, just think how you feel. See how you're feeling. What do you think?

Love it. And keep walking, keep walking. If all else fails, you're going to end up with, uh, with 15 meatballs and a lot— a hell of a big sandwich.

Cappuccino. You never know.

Thank you, Gary. That was, uh, that was uplifting. I'm definitely going to put that into practice. And, uh, you know, we obviously encourage everybody listening to do the same.

And George, by the way, you are so awesome.

Oh, thanks, thanks. How are you? It's working, I feel great already.

I feel fab.

Cheers, Gary. See you all next time.