Hannah Rose explores what it takes to truly listen to someone's pain. She explains why empathy demands vulnerability from the listener, and how resisting the urge to fix things or offer comfort phrases is what actually helps.
Holding space for someone else's pain is inherently vulnerable. It's so vulnerable, and vulnerability is uncomfortable. And so many of us go to this place of, "Well, let me make you feel better." You know, and how often in our interpersonal relationships do we say, or are we told, "I don't want you to fix it. I just want you to listen." And as therapists and people in the mental health field, we know that active listening, holding space, you know, can you imagine a client saying something really painful to you and you saying, "Well, you know, at least you're in therapy now." But I personally would never say that. Like, "Well, let's just look at the bright side." Like, no, let's acknowledge the complete array of human emotion. Now, I don't know if you're anything like this, especially the first few years of my therapeutic practice, I noticed such discrepancies in the ways that I was able to have empathy and compassion for my clients, but how that differed in my interpersonal relationships. And it was really humbling to look at what lessons can I learn from the therapeutic experience
