In this 12‑step teaching video, therapist Hannah Rose, LCPC, guides viewers through Step 2 – “came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” She frames the step around the principle of hope, explaining that hope allows a person who feels out of control or “insane” (repeating the same behavior while expecting different results) to envision restoration. Rose shares personal examples of people‑pleasing, boundary failures, and a recurring family dynamic that left her feeling resentful. A sponsor’s insight and an Al‑Anon analogy (searching for emotional support where none exists is like looking for bread in a hardware store) illustrate how to recognize when one’s expectations are unrealistic. She then discusses her evolving spirituality, drawing on Eastern philosophy and the Tao as her conception of a higher power, emphasizing that belief can be any non‑self‑centered force. The video offers two reflective prompts – (1) identify insane patterns in your life, and (2) articulate your current belief about a higher power – and encourages journaling or free‑flow writing. Rose recommends working the steps with a sponsor, therapist, or coach, and previews the next video on Step 3, which will focus on action.
Chapters
Hey everyone, welcome back for day 3, step 2, which is came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Now, if you're on this app, it's probably because you are seeking something bigger than you, be it different theological approaches, clinical approaches, the teachers who really inspire us to just sit and be still, connecting with nature, connecting with our intuition, connecting to the universe, connecting to others. And that's what the step is beginning to bring us into. The second step question is, do you believe, or are you willing to believe, That a power greater than you can restore you to sanity. Now, I think one of the biggest questions is, in addition to that, what would you change if you truly believed that everything was going to be okay? What would change in your life if you truly believed everything is going to be okay? Even if I get out of the way. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. There's a couple points and principles in this step that are important to touch on. One of them is the principle of hope. There is hope that even if my life has felt unmanageable, and if there have been times where I have felt insane, I can be restored To sanity. Now, in many 12-step programs, we often say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Feel free to pause this video after this next prompt. What in your life have you been doing over and over again and getting the same results despite thinking it's going to be different this time? For me, I can think of a couple of things. I used to have a pattern of people pleasing and not setting boundaries. And in my mind, if I kept people pleasing, everything would just work out and I would feel better. I seldom felt better, and yet I would ignore my truth. And continue trying to meet other people's needs, or what I thought other people's needs were, and then I would get frustrated and resentful and angry. When we think about insanity, we can also bring to mind if there's any dynamics in our lives where we are continually feeling surprised at their behavior. Or frustrated and resentful. And here's why. For example, I have a family member and I consistently used to go to them for emotional support, and they consistently were unable to provide me that level of support. And I created a whole narrative about it. First, that I'm not enough, I'm not good enough, I'll never be, I'll make— I'm never going to make them proud. You know, like I really internalized it, and then it became they're doing this, they're doing this, they're doing this, and I was so full of resentment. And I'll never forget, I had a sponsor say to me once—and a sponsor is someone who's been through the 12 steps that is then taking you through the 12 steps—and if you're not in a 12-step program, you don't need a sponsor. I do recommend going through these steps with another human being at some point, like a therapist or a coach, if you're not. I'm in a 12-step program. I go through the Codependent Guide to the 12 Steps with clients that I do one-on-one work with all the time. My dog is barking, so I'm going to pause this. And we're back. So my behavior is essentially insane if I'm doing the same thing and expecting different results. So I had a sponsor say to me, is this the first time this family member has been unable to support you emotionally? And I said, no, they've always been this way. And, you know, I always try to do this, this, and this and this, but they are keep being— they continue to be this way. My sponsor said, huh, so at what point are you going to look at the fact that this person has given you no evidence that they have the capacity to show up for you emotionally, and yet you're the one continuing to show up in this dynamic expecting them to be different than they've been. And it sounds like that's a you problem. And I was like, oh my gosh. And in Al-Anon, they say that, you know, looking for emotional availability from Someone who has shown you that they can't give it at this juncture in time is like going to a hardware store and looking for bread. It's just not there. It's not personal. It doesn't have to do with you. But at the end of the day, I am showing up expecting someone to be different based on no evidence. And so I get to look at, oh my God, my behavior. is signing me up for suffering rather than accepting reality as it is and maybe going elsewhere for emotional support or grieving the fact that it doesn't feel like I have that relationship that I want. I am continuously trying to fit a square peg into a round hole, and it's simply not going to work. And so in this step, we also look at what is it that I believe in? I came into a 12-step fellowship very, very angry and vitriolic towards anything spiritual. And, you know, that contempt prior to investigation kept me in my own suffering for a long time. I'll share with you what I currently believe in, and it changes and it ebbs and it flows. I am really drawn to Eastern philosophy and specifically the Tao, which can be translated to the way. I believe in the universe and nature and this life force, this underlying infinity that connects all of us. And so that's my spirituality, that's my higher power. And the 12 steps reiterate that you can believe in anything you want to believe in, you just have to believe that you are not The end-all be-all. And you may say, well, of course I'm not the end-all be-all. But how often are we playing God by trying to manage outcomes and control things that are out of our control? So step 2, came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Where has your behavior been insane? Where have you been doing the same thing and expecting different results? And what is it that you believe in? What is your conception of a higher power or God or spirituality? And so those are 2 prompts that you can use. Feel free to rewind and write them down. Again, you can pause these videos at any time so that you can write these prompts, or you can just free flow journal. And I will see you tomorrow for step 3, which is where we really lean into action. I'll see you there.
