A Time to Learn or a Time to Believe?

Hey, welcome to the podcast. I'm Kris Plachy and this is the CEO Sage. Hi. I don't think I'm ever gonna not feel silly when I start a podcast. Anyway, listen to me. I have been writing and thinking and all the things. And I went to dinner with a friend last night, and oh gosh, she's been through it. You know, I've had my share this year, but we're no different from, I believe, everybody who has their AirPods in who's listening to this. Like, everyone is sort of navigating, you know, these things. I said to her, you know, in my girlfriend voice, because, you know, when I'm with my girlfriends, I'm trying really hard not to be a coach. And I just said to her, you know, I really do think that I have believed for a very long time that it's going to get easier. And I mean, it really isn't. And she's like, yeah, no. And I'm like, right? So what is that about? Like, and why do we expect it? You know? And, and then I have all, all of these kids. I have 3 kids who are in their 20s and I'm watching them wrangle all these very, you know, in many ways feels like really big choices and decisions. And I talk to other kids their age and I just wanna say to them, listen to me. You stay right here. Like, you absorb this time in your life and you just live it because it is so beautiful and fun. And that's not to say that all the other phases of life aren't beautiful and fun. I just do believe it just keeps being things. And, um, yeah. And so I started this podcast with a A sentence in my mind, which is that there are some times in life for learning, and then there are some times in life for just believing. And I think that sometimes we overuse learning as a crutch for when we really do know enough. We have learned what we need to learn. And now we need to believe in whatever is coming, or whatever we're capable of, or whatever we know is true for us, or whatever we are, um, like super excited and passionate about, or whatever we most want next, instead of reverting back to Oh, I need to learn more. I need to study more. I need to explore. I have to have 5 more conversations with 5 more people about it before I do something. And you get to a certain place, I think, in life where really— I mean, it doesn't mean that we don't all always learn, so don't misunderstand that. I always find learning so fascinating. And also though, there are some things that I don't think I need anymore, like tools. I don't need to learn another way. What I need to do is believe. I need to practice the simplicity that comes with knowing that what I know now is excellent and that I have what I need to achieve what it is I say I want, or I have what I need to experience what it— what I say I want. I don't need more information. But the world wants us to think we need more information, right? We need more people to talk to, we need more money to spend, we need more all the things, right? So if we, if we are, you know, sort of tapping into the metaverse, we are constantly reminded there's more to know, there's more to do, there's more to try, there's more things to buy, right? And That's, you know, it's one of the reasons why I cherish my own experiences that I create for my clients. Like when we go to Hawaii, you know, when we sit by the beach and we, and we just allow what is already within us to be present. And to guide us. You know, I've said on the past few podcasts, like, I believe a lot of us get a lot of really great guidance, and you can call that from whatever source you want it to come from. It's God, it's universe, it's spirit, it's hummingbirds. Listen, I love it all. I think we all sort of have this tap-in Where we go. And I think everybody should have it, whatever it is for you. I don't know that we listen to it as well as we could or would if we weren't inter— if there wasn't so much interference. And so I just wrote an email today about, you know, complicated isn't an excuse. And what I talked about in that email is how I watch people that I talk to You know, fight to keep things complicated so that then they're really hard to do or solve or fix. Even when you, you know, from an outside perspective, you can see the simplicity of a solution. It's like, that's why I say that, right? Achieving what we most want really is a straight line. It's just clouded with all of our own You know, effery nonsense that we've carried around for years. Our beliefs, our skills, our experiences, our fears, our judgments, right? Our over-analysis paralysis, all this stuff. So when someone comes to me and says, hey, this is what I really want, and I'm like, okay, well, that's like probably 3 or 4 things to do. What? Let's talk about getting those 3 or 4 things. Oh no, no, no, no, you don't understand how How complicated it is, how complex. And then there's a period of time where I watch someone who has really fought the good fight to keep it complex want to keep it, which at a logic level doesn't make any sense, right? But I think it's this, that we have this trained pattern now. That we must— there must be something else I need to know before this complexity could be dissolved. When really all you need to do is believe that you can do the next thing, right? And honestly, it— you could insert anything into this equation and you may not like it. But that doesn't mean it's supposed to stay complex, right? I just made a video about getting what you want. It's on my website if you want it. You can go there and opt in for it. And what I talk about though in the video is that I was having this thought because we're in soccer season now and driving to and from the Bay, it's 2, at least 2 hours there and back. Every time we go, it's fine. It's not a big deal. But I thought, gosh, man, you know what I really want? What I really, really, really want? Wouldn't it be cool if we could just have someone drive us? And then I watched my mind want to figure out how I could do that. Wonder how much it would cost. Blah, blah, blah. Oh, that's silly. That's ridiculous. The people—you shouldn't spend money on that. What are could? What would people say? If you rolled out of your black Suburban to go to the game, right? I had all the stories and I just watched how I made it very complicated when all that separates us from getting a car to take us to and from the game is me booking it and paying for it. That's it. And You do the same thing right now. I could make it like, well, I got to research. I got to figure out this. I got to figure out that. I got to make sure this. I don't know about this. This is source. I mean, what I should probably spend my money on different things. La la la la la la la la la! Right? This is what we do, and then we don't get what we want because you know it's just so. I just invite you to like next time you're like, oh no no, I probably should. I should probably talk to more people about that. I should probably explore. Do you? Really need to learn more, Mama. You just need to believe in it. Like legit. And here's what I also think is true: it's oftentimes incredibly hard to see your own brain at work here because you're so in it. You're so so in it. So I'll share one more example. I recently, with all of the challenges, my mom was very unwell. I think I talked about this on a previous podcast and still is unwell. She's, she has a terminal diagnosis of congestive heart failure and she's on hospice and she's doing well, which is good. She has great care. And shortly after she got home from the nursing center, She started to feel better, which was really good news. And my mom is all there, brain works just fine. She's just her body is poopy and it sucks. And so once she started to feel a little better, I could tell that she was getting frustrated that sort of a lot of the decision making for herself had been taken over by me and others because we needed to, given the circumstances that. We were in at the time, and I started to feel really overwhelmed by how much I was involved in all of these decisions that were about her life. And I, I was, I felt I would talk to Mike about it. I would talk to my girlfriend about it. Like it all felt very hard, very complex. I don't understand this stuff. I'm not really sure what I'm doing. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. I was really really in a. And I had this moment where I realized, oh, she's very capable of handling this. I didn't need to continue to learn how to do what I thought I needed to learn how. I just needed to let go. I needed to believe that my mom's going to be fine and she has the ability right now. To care for herself. And so I said to her, you know, I think this is yours. You sh— you're so capable, and this must be really frustrating for you to have lost so much independence. I, I would like to release the responsibility for these things and give them back to you because you, you can. And she has done so well at that because my mom has always been a leader and she's always been managing her people. So she has her team and I'm here in the sidelines, but it has made all the difference. And it's— I think it's been better for the two of us for me not to be— I'm 2 hours away. I'm not necessarily in the position to be as resourceful as I could be. But what I want to say is I think a lot of us stay stuck in believing we need to know more, we need to do more. We're now stuck, we're trapped. We are responsible in ways that we aren't. We've, we spin in the drama of a circumstance. And I just stopped myself from doing that. I don't have to do this. And I don't actually think this is the best choice for both of us right now. This is, and that was a straight line. It was a conversation. So I just invite you to understand, like I, Without the tools and the people in my life, I would not have noticed that. I would've stayed in a spin. I would've gotten really overwhelmed and frustrated, but I stopped it before we got there, before it got incredibly dramatic and all the things that, you know, ends up happening in these circumstances. I don't want that for any of us. And so that's why I believe that everybody needs a coach and everybody needs a room to come into to bring it. To leave it at the just say, okay, this is blah. This is what's happening. And I think it's especially unique when you have been a high achieving, high performing woman. Like you're solving everybody else's stuff. Who calls you on yours, Mama? So I I just want you to take a minute today and ask yourself, okay, whatever this thing is that you've been kind of. On a treadmill on or spinning or just feel sort of cornered by or can't see your way out of. And you keep thinking there must be like something you could go get, a person you could hire, right? Like, no, maybe there's no learning necessary. Maybe we just need to name what it is we most want and ask ourselves, what does the woman who believes that is possible And has all the tools already, has all the skill, has all the knowledge. What is the woman who knows and believes that that is possible? What does she do differently than what you've been doing? And do that. And that's not a guarantee it will be perfect, but it will move you. It will move you out of where you are into a new location, literally and figuratively, which then you have a new point of view. So give that a shot. And if you're curious, head over to thevisionary.co to see what we're up to. Thanks for tuning in.