Episode 3: Living a Rare Life w. Erik Rock

Welcome to Scar Tissue, the podcast. I'm your host, Melissa Dugalecki. And here we understand the power that lies within our pain, that lies within the scars and the wounds and the nicks and the burns that come with.

The experience of life.

When we learn how to leverage this, it is a powerful tool and capital, and that not only can take you.

To your next level in your life.

But can make massive impact on others as well in the most beautiful ways.

So here on Scar Tissue, we have.

Real, raw, and relatable conversations that will show you that there is not one way to live, that the word should doesn't exist and doesn't serve us in.

The vocabulary of our lives.

That you are meant to live and create your most authentic self, and that we are worthy of everything but entitled to nothing. It is up to us to create it and to create from a place of love, opportunity, possibility, and authenticity. Let's dive in.

I am so excited to introduce you to today's guest. Such an amazing human, good friend of mine and somebody who I just absolutely love playing life and business with. So please join me in welcoming Eric Rock. Eric is not only an amazing entrepreneur, he's an investor, he's a mentor, he's a coach, he's a speaker, he's an author. The list goes on and on and on. But, you know, outside of his accolades that you can throw on the list, truly he is just a pure soul who pours so much love, authenticity, integrity, and truth into his people. And I have been honored to be a part of that. So, Eric, welcome. On.

Thank you, Melissa. I appreciate you having me.

Yeah, absolutely. So for some of the listeners, they've probably gotten to know you through my content and our work together and the event, but many people tuning in might not even be in the world of entrepreneurship. So let the people know who you be.

Let the people know. Well, I would. I. I will start by saying I wish this audience could have heard the first hour of this podcast before we started recording it. You ever, like, been on. You ever been on a podcast before where, like, you just start vibing and there's so much gold that comes out? It's like, all right, are we going to start now? We not started already, but we just had. We went really deep. We went so deep, and now it's like to reset is interesting. So. Hi, my name is Eric Rock. No, but. But on the real y. Yeah. So I'm definitely a serial entrepreneur. I love the pressure of business, 100%. This is where it's led me is to you Guys, out in the light. It's a lot of what I preach is to step in the light, to find your truth, to find your voice, find your purpose, your passion, your mission in life. And had I known what I know now, this is probably where I would have started in business. This is not how it all started for me, obviously, but knowing what I know now, I literally would have started with personal brand as really making my. My. My heart, my face, sort of the forefront of what I did. Mission and purpose I would have led with. But I just didn't have enough wherewithal in the early days to do that. I was just trying to win. All I knew is I had a deep desire since childhood to become somebody to win, and that's the only thing I focused on. So. But it all led me to you.

Guys, so it's all perfect. You know, Eric, it's an interesting thing that you bring up because that's something that I get to really work on my mindset, to not allow myself to go there. Not from a place of. I wish. Right. Like, because, you know, I started in education, and if I had known what I know now, I would have started here immediately. And so it's like always, I think for anyone listening, they can probably resonate, like, how many times we look back and be like, if I knew what I knew now, right. Like, I would do this differently. And I don't know what your thoughts are, but for me, it's just like, just surrendering to a trust. And this is exactly how it was meant to unfold. And I don't know if you have anything that, like, kind of you go to when those thoughts come up at all, or if they do.

Yeah, well, hindsight's always 20 20. I think the smartest thing, too, is for anyone tuning in is number one, just with this simple thought to start, well, let's do this now. But what I really mean by that is a lot of these people that have now access to things that maybe me and you didn't. I'm 40 years old. You're 42, right? You're 40 years old. Yeah, 40.

42.

42. Like me. You're 42, right.

Like, I just want to be clear to the audience. I just want to be clear.

So we're both here at 40. We grew up in an environment where there wasn't so much access to information. But for a young person now that doesn't know, if you just get connected to anyone through any kind of content that you may be consuming that has this message, you may Be able to skip a lot of steps. I didn't have the wherewithal to know to go get coaching or mentorship. I would just say it's really valuable when you get near someone that's sort of done what you've wanted to already. I would have skipped the Eric Rock today, could have gone Back to the 18 year old Eric Rock and I would have skipped a lot of pain, a lot of trauma, a lot of imposter thoughts, a lot of terrible behavior and bad decisions. At every level I would have helped, but I just didn't know to go near people that were thriving at the highest levels and I would have known how to have access to them, how to get into their worlds, how to bring value to their worlds. So knowing what I know now, of course that, but the main thing is this, this world now is filled with access to people and information. There's so there's such an easier thread to skipping steps and it's not through school and education. That's that traditional method that I think unfortunately is indoctrinating most kids to stay small, to be compliant, to live an uninspired life. And I say that with like all due respect. I just think the system has been hijacked and rigged by people that they don't have really like dream achievement is their primary objective anymore, unfortunately, the people that kind of run this thing from the top. So to have access to a Melissa or to Eric or anyone that you admire greatly through the, through social media content, it's so important because it should inadvertently skip you right past a lot of the pain points that we had to fight through organically. But the bigger question is, do you need to go through those to become the person you are today? And that's something that is definitely worth a look. But at the end of the day, I have a lot of young people in my world, 18 year olds, and they are light years ahead mentally, spiritually and physically, where I was at 18, primarily because they're near me and I get to see it with my own eyes. I'm like, damn this kid, like what a leg up he has. I was sitting at a table literally yesterday at a mastermind that I put on. I had a mother who had enough, she's an incredible woman, but she had enough bandwidth to bring her son and enroll him into my mastermind, which is a high ticket mastermind. It's not cheap. And so I got this 18 year old in the group with a bunch of millionaires, right? And there's all like high level people in this room and I'm sitting at this round table with the eight year old and I'm just like chewing on it, you know, I just love it. He's already starting his own business, he's about to have his first customer. He's getting all sort of the groundwork done right now. And it's just amazing to see a young child, like a child have this kind of leg up in life. What a genius play. And so again, testimony to the mother. Like I got to give the mother credit in this situation and I want, I want to just spice that story up with one last thought. So the mother, as we went around the table, she questioned her purpose. Like her, like what is her mission? Because that's a lot of what we challenge people with. And I looked at her, I said, you know what, you may, because of your son, be someone that's mission ends up affecting millions of lives. If your one mission alive is to raise an amazing human to be an incredible mother, that alone, I don't think women give themselves enough credit for raising good children that have the access and resources as early as possible. And this mother, her contribution to her son at this level at 18, it was so clear to me. It's like, oh my God, through you, you could touch millions of lives because you raised this person and then you made investments him in the right areas. It's just genius. But you can see this 18 year old just teeming, being around this energy. While the 18 year olds are drinking, they're partying, they're making terrible decisions. Here's this guy getting near the heart and soul of what I think is the holy grail to life.

Yeah, I mean it is really powerful. And I do think that learning to think differently is really important. Like if you think about it, we're just programmed like from school and then it's just checklist and you do this and then this is the next thing, and then this is the next, next thing. And then, you know, you go to college and then you, whatever it is. And it's just like so many people fall into this checklist way of living, you know. And I think for me, one of the most powerful things and, and losing Laden was it gave me the space to let go of the word should. Like because they termed her case a catastrophe. Right. And so it kept, in my head, it kept being like, it shouldn't have happened, it shouldn't have happened. And then it really invited me into this space of understanding, like my relationship with the word should. Well, this is how it should be. This is what we should do. This is what you should do next. This is what you shouldn't do. And I. I see that so often, and I just want to invite anyone listening into, like, really examining where are you taking action or doing things out of the way, or from the word should, which is basically like kind of walking, like, sleepwalking through life, just following a map that someone else has made for you rather than paving your own path, you know? And, yeah, Eric, I think something we both really. I mean, we have a lot of. A lot of things in common, but I think that. And also, fun fact. Eric's birthday is Laden's due date, so I'm like, I love that. I just love it. And I got to be with you. When you were in Tulum, we had the event going on, but this was Leighton's 10th birthday, and it was easily, by far, like, the best my heart has felt on her birthday. Oh, I just got emotional. Thank you.

What a journey you've been on. And I would just add in the greatest people in the world that I've ever met, they're the ones that come through the worst circumstances, and they turn those terrible circumstances into mission purpose. And these are the people that leave the greatest gifts in the world. And there's so many people that do it the exact opposite way. They let the circumstance dictate the value of their life, and they never really end up doing anything. That's very inspiring. They don't really help humanity. They think they can't do something because of the circumstance that they unfortunately had. And I would say for people that have eyes to see, that could be the greatest gateway as a gift from God to live a life full of real value and purpose.

Thank you. Thank you for acknowledging that. But we've both really kind of created our own paths, like, our own ways. And so for you, like, what was that journey like, what was that trajectory like in terms of you kind of figuring out where you want to be and, like, what you really value? And you talk a lot about value and standards and how those have really played into what you're doing.

Yeah. You know, I was on a podcast yesterday, and this same sort of question came up, and I was thinking about how I answered it, because I really liked where my heart went in that moment. I think I might as well kind of steer it right in same center of gravity. But so much of my childhood growing up was. Was stacking chips on my shoulder and really learning how to leverage those. Some of my greatest mentors that I've had, Ben Newman, he He calls these, these chips, in a sense, the burn. Tim Grover, he calls it the darkness. Tim Grover was the mindset and performance coach for all of Michael Jordan's career. So he, he literally coached the best, most aggressive, competitive mindsets in the world, and he called it the darkness. I do feel like I had some of that darkness my whole life. Somehow I was working so hard as a child because I was leveraging these early chips that were stacked on my shoulder. And what it would, what it would mean for me is in my mind, sort of quietly, I was saying, fuck you. Watch me, watch me to everyone. It's like I had something to prove to everyone, even as a child. And so for years, it would take a long time before I would forgive that and come to my greatest self, my freest self, because it's, you can get very far in life and win for an eternity if you just leverage pain. I mean, it'll take you far. You could leverage fear, leverage pain. There's a lot great things to leverage along the way. The greatest gift you can leverage is real forgiveness and mission. Those are the two greatest gifts that you compare to each other. And I don't know if you can really have been your purpose and on your mission if you've not forgiven all the things, but the things that you may be forgiven are the things that kept you winning over a lifetime, if that makes sense. And so that was sort of my reality to early age is I had a deep desire. Maybe not for the right reasons at the time, but it didn't matter. I was a small guy. I didn't have a lot of natural talent. I was little for my age when I was young. And so at an early age, the thing I tapped into was the gym. Even at like 11 or 12 years old, I was working out every single day. And it was one gift that I got given to me by my older cousin. Trent was like a hero in my life because of this one gift he gave me. He was a Notre Dame college grad one summer that came into town and I was just this 11 year old little kid. Here's my older cousin who like looked at legs like a hero and he taught me how to work out. And so that was the greatest sort of gift you could have given me as a child. Someone that already had these natural chips on his shoulder. I, I now got to pour sort of that aggression into the gym. A very healthy addiction started accruing. And even at a young age, I was able to start leveraging endorphins. And what a great Hack again, trying to think about how to be a great parent. There is no one way, and even the best get it wrong. I mean, who knows what the best formula is? But when I look back, I realized sort of the nuts and bolts of me was actually a great formula. You know, it kept me winning, and I was searching for something, I was working for something as a child. So a lot of the people that I coach and entrepreneurs I coach that have children, especially ones that are winning, I coach a lot of rich people, people that have a lot. People that have a lot of money. You know, they're looking for that next level. I've coached a lot of wealth. I'll tell you this. So much of what they're doing is wrong that I see from just my honest perspective, they're doing it wrong. There. There's too much comfort for that child. There's got to be a certain degree of fight. Does that make sense? If a child comes to you with a problem, don't solve that child's problem. Let them work it out and shut up. I mean, it's a great piece of advice, right? Maybe it's not for some people, but for me, this is the sort of tenacity that I was forced in my life. My parents didn't have any resources. I never met my biological father. So I had a single mother for a lot of years, early years of my life. Then my stepdad came in. He was a very tough man. I was very scared of him. My whole childhood, I was so afraid of doing anything bad. But he became the person I was probably most obsessed with. To please, to. To get. Gain approval, to gain the love of. And even in that, there's a lesson in that I was working for something at a young age that wasn't just handed to me. My brother was handed. Love is what it felt like. My stepbrother, who. That was his real dad. So we grew up in the same house, but we experienced different love. And I think the reality of his world in mine, even in the same household, was so different that I felt like Cinderella in many cases my whole life. And I started leveraging those emotions to try to win, to become someone. And again, so. So this is where the fight in a child starts. And it's real. There's real value in this if you could figure out how to do this in a healthy way. And I think you can. By the way, there's so much money in this conversation. Because when you look at Cinderella, first of all, Cinderella ended up being beautiful. She was always beautiful. She was Always classy. She always had heart, spirit, soul. All the animals loved Cinderella. I love telling the story. Cinderella ended up with the prince in the castle. Trust me, you do not want to be Drizella and Anastasia, the ugly, wretched humans who had everything handed to them. You don't want to be an Anastasia, trust me. Or Drizella. What a. Oh. I mean, that story of Cinderella, I think, is really profound because that, honestly, might be the best way to curate a winning mindset at a young age. Let them work for it. And I was working for something at a young age. It's only now that I'm so grateful for it. It became my greatest gift, and I'm very thankful for it. And I forgave the. That I was leveraging the wrong way the whole time. Even though they were letting me win, I had to forgive them. To be fully free to take the handcuffs off, I had to fully forgive. That wouldn't happen until I was almost 40, if you can believe it. Like, deep, actually, at 40. I mean, literally in this year, I fully came free. And it was only because I stepped into the light, which challenged me in ways that nothing I'd ever done ever has. Which is a different story, a different part of this podcast, I'm sure, maybe. But going back to that young child, there's a lot of lessons and there's a lot of nuts and bolts in in this story, I promise you. And there's a lot of connection that I make in my story to other people that are winning. People that win at the highest levels have nothing handed to them, I promise you. Now, if you are one of those odd, rare specimens, you're just an odd duck. It's very hard to hand down resilience. It's very hard to hand down the temperament that keeps the greatest winners winning at the highest levels. These are people that are tenacious, they're aggressive, they are hunters, they fight hard, they stay in the burn long. Next guy. How do you build that in a child? How do you build that kind of desire, that will to win? It means they have to be in some sort of fight. There have. Listen, just like. I mean, a gym is a great representation. When you tear all that muscle tissue, you have to physically go tear it. It's hard work. It breaks you apart. Your body is actually shredded apart. All these micro tears that are bleeding all over your bodies that you're destroying, there's a growth process. The growth happens in the repair. You tear it, you repair it, you tear it, you repair it. If you're never Tearing it, there's nothing to repair, there's no growth and comfort is what I think is destroying modern day humanity in children. We have iPhones, we are on the couch all the time. We have an obesity problem in this country like never before. We're eating chemicals on a regular basis. Listen, there's no shortage of pessimistic problems I could present in this podcast. But at the end of the day, you have the decision as a parent, as a human, how you're going to live, what you're going to put in your mouth, what decisions you're going to make. You get to decide how you're going to operate and you get to decide what kind of comfort you're going going to decide to live in and your children are going to get to live in. These are all profound decisions. But it's very hard, I think, to thrive at the highest levels. If you're not in an environment where people are challenging you. When you're not near people that operate their lives the way like me and you do, with really high standards, that gets challenging. And I think when I, when I look around humanity at large, their environment is plagued with toxic behavior, bad habits. There's a lot of alcohol going on, a lot of partying, a lot of drinking, a lot of just a lot of small thinking, a lot of really painful experiences that are redundant. There's no systems, there's no processes, no one's building anything, no one's dreaming big. And if they are, that's all they are. There's a dream. There's no blueprint to put behind it. When you get to the core of, like, what the value we try to present to people, you really have to go start with what did your life look like in the beginning? What cultivated the mindset that you have. And if you have a bad mindset, if your mindset's not ticking at the highest levels, well, then we have work to do. And this is what's cool is I've watched a mindset get warped just by getting in the right room, by changing your environment. That alone is a gift. Like, listen, if you're around me long enough, you'll stop drinking. You'll never drink alcohol again. If you're in my proximity. My standard is so high and I'm so contagious as a human because I'm so aggressive for life. You'll want to be this too. I inspired by my own actions. And it's because I'm around people constantly that inspire me, that have insanely high standards, that win at the highest levels. And they truly are free. No handcuffs. Most people in life are slaves. I'll kind of end that thought with that.

So many nuggets in there. As always, thank you for sharing. And it's interesting to. For anyone to reflect on, like, how their childhood impacted, you know, their mindset, their behaviors, and where they're going. And it's not a right or wrong. And I want to. No, I really want to emphasize that your point around forgiveness and remembering, this is what I always come back to. We actually had very similar things. We've talked about this a bit before, but, like, you know, my parents are divorced, and I did see my biological father growing up. Last time I've seen him was Leon's funeral 10 years ago. So, you know, I really never had a relationship like a real one. I was very fortunate in that my. My stepdad and my mom, like, we. We were in good shape, but my stepdad had such. He instilled such a work ethic in me. Like, nothing was handed out. This is your budget for your prom dress. Anything above that, you're paying for. I mean, I was working since I was, like, 12 years. When I was 10 years old, I was working at the coffee shop every weekend. And he. You know, I think that was really, really powerful. You know, I definitely. A lot of things of feeling, like, not quite the Cinderella, but, like, kind of the outsider, because it was like his three boys that he had with my mom and then me. Right. You know, and I just felt like, you know, I feel that I created a lot of my own stories, but I felt very much like an outsider. I actually turned to, like, my teacher at the time. Probably why I went into education. Right. Looking at how impacted we are. Teacher, coach. I think I told you, he was a football coach, he was a baseball coach. And he actually used to joke that he was, like, my third dad, you know, and. But how much all of these things impact us. And I always had that work ethic instilled in me. And my dad always says, like, I call my dad. He's my stepdad, but he always says, melissa, no one's gonna outwork you. And I'm going to visit them soon, like, next week. And I'm literally gonna be like, dad, I met someone who I think might be able to outwork me. His name's Eric.

No, you. You work as hard as they come. At some point. Listen, let me add to this side. You're. You're a workhorse. I know you very well. At some point, you can only work so Hard. It gets to a point when it all is the same. I mean, I'm talking to my boy Eric Spofford yesterday over in. And this is, you know, by the time he was done with the day, he had 13 hours put placed yesterday on his day. That's normal for me. That's normal for you. 12, 13 hour days are very normal. Like I get up way before the sun and I'll stop working. I'll put the pen down way after the sun goes down. This is so fucking. I mean that's an everyday occurrence. Almost like I don't stop working. But at some point you can only work so much. The game really becomes about being efficient. Systems, processes scaling, you know, being working smarter, not harder. But yeah, you're right, it's a prerequisite for real success. Yeah, you got to put in a lot of hours. Listen, you want to, you want to buy shit without looking at the fucking, at the price tag. You got to work without looking at the clock, period.

It's like a mic drop right there. Like goodbye everyone. You got enough? No, but okay, something I want to, I want to go into this because actually as we're just dropping in and obviously you and I never script what we're going to go into. But no one, you gotta love the burn. You brought up the burn. Don't just feel it. Love the burn. I love it. Like I was at the gym this morning and like, man, I was doing like sled pushes and it burned and I was like, oh, like hell yeah. Lit up. I like get turned on by the burn. Literally.

Like, let's go, let's go work.

Like. So I want to invite everyone into that. But you and I talk a lot about living rare and.

Oh yeah, oh yeah.

And like there's like this complacency or this, I don't know what it is. I don't want to say complacency, but this false expectation, a lot of people have that to create extraordinary results that they can bypass the grunt work, the grind and all of that. And like, not only do I think that's unrealistic and like kind of like almost like in a hidden entitlement. Sorry, just gonna say it. I think that it's actually robbing yourself of experiencing. Like why would you want to miss that part?

Like you're, I mean you're taking, you're taking my, you're taking the words out of my mouth.

Okay, you go.

Listen, if you didn't earn it, you don't want it. If it didn't hurt. Listen if you didn't earn it, you don't want it. If it didn't hurt, give it back. Because it doesn't mean shit if there's not a pain point. It has no meaning. I promise you money won't mean anything if you didn't work for it. Listen, like, this idea of being a trust fund baby makes me sick to my stomach. Keep the fucking money. I want to earn it myself. Because that's where, that's where the real pride comes in. That's where real fulfillment comes in. That's where looking at what you created and you're proud of it, People that wait around for their parents to die, trust me, because now I'm around a lot of wealthy people and I hear this all the time. I just talked about this the other day. Generational wealth you hear so many people talking about. I'm building generational wealth. Oh, so you can go leave your kids a bunch of problems. You know how many times the patriot, the patriarch of a family dies and here come the kids like little swarming sharks. You know how tacky and distasteful that is? That, that literally kind of breaks my heart. But the reality is is that causes so much feud in family. I've seen families destroyed over money. At the end of the day, you should not be wanting to leave your kids money. You should be wanting to leave them the resources to make their fucking own. The mindset to make their own. The resilience to make their own, the perseverance to make their own. Go get your own back. I'm going to leave this money to the dolphins who are suffering over in Venezuela. Like you get my point? There's so many better uses. I'll keep a foundation going of charity. At the end, there's no freebies, there's no free lunches. Because it is only going to hurt you if you can't make it on your own. You should not be part of this conversation. Like, at the end of the day, this is what winners look like. This is what they feel like. Generational wealth is actually a curse. I've watched it destroy families. My business partner, who's a billionaire, made some horrific mistakes with his children. And he's a very honest about it, these little brats, because he was already very wealthy by the time they came of age. He did it all wrong and he regrets all of it. He's not leaving them a dime now. He's, he's taking that back. He's already written tens of million dollars in checks to these kids. They've embezzled money out of his company. Trust me when I tell you, when it comes to wealth, most kids are fucked up. It's because they don't have any resilience. Listen, guys like me and you, Melissa, will circle around these girls. Trust. Trust. You get my point? Trust fund, trust fund babies. Guys like us, like humans like us, people like us, we will destroy you. And that's just a. That is just the resources because we are so hungry. It's hard to be hungry if you never had to work for it. How are you gonna be hungry if you've been being fed your whole life? And we talk a lot about this. Living a rare life. To me, I mean, I'll just go to this ancestral connection to being hungry in general. Listen, we hunt hungry. We don't hunt on full bellies. We hunt hungry. It's ancestral. It's in our nature. I actually take that physically seriously. I don't eat. I don't. I eat one meal today because I stay hungry all day. The second I eat, I feel lazy, tired, and sloppy. I mean, it literally goes down to, like, actually, food for me. I want to be hungry all day. And I think that's metaphorically true, and it's literally true for me, but rare life. Yeah. So good.

I know. We're both the same. We both, like, when you're like, I only want to meal, I'm like, me too. You know, it just. It just works. It's just, you know, people complicate things so much. Like, think about the amount of time wasted on meal prep or Pinterest, searching recipes or this or that and grocery shop. Like, it's just like, my time is way too valuable. Way too valuable. And two, I don't need it. I do. Look back at versions of me, and I feel sad for her. Like, I was talking about this recently with someone when I was, like, broke, and I, like, wanted to, like, you know, impress at a barbecue and went to two grocery stores and was searching on Pinterest. So, yes, that was me to make, like, the perfect lobster macaroni and cheese. You know what I mean? Like, that was $92 per dish. Now I'm like, messy. Can you, like, my. My chef, you know, make something, you know, Like, I'm not. Like, that's not where I'm spending my time. But. But I digressed a little bit. You were really speaking into. God, you have so many.

Being hungry, being hungry, staying hungry. Well, let me just add to that real quick, because I think you. I think the audience would want to hear this. Listen, food is killing America. It's killing. It's killing everyone in this country. You're watching a plague happen right in front of you, and you're just sleeping while it's happening. And listen, every time you're hungry, you should not eat. Like, I'm just going to say this right now, like, speaking to the health side of me, it took me a lifetime of being obsessed with how to be a top performer to realize you don't need to have breakfast, lunch, and dinner. What a waste of time. Being hungry is a gift. It's a gift from God. Trust me. You want to be aggressive, hungry, hunter. In life, when you're hungry, everything gets clear. When you go on the hunt, you walk softer. You're like a panda in the wild, just softly walking through the jungle looking for food. You know what I mean? You're like, you're very, very soft. And you're a creature that is like, very, very. You have clarity. Your mind is human. People mistake that as hangry. They haven't figured out how to repurpose that energy into focus. But I would just say this from a health perspective. I'm just going to dabble a little love here. When your body is in a state of autophagy every day, that means your body has no calories and you're starting to go into ketosis. Your body's burning fat for fuel because there's no sugar and there's no glucose in your body. There's no food in. There's no calories in your body. There's no carbohydrates in your body. That is a beautiful state in your body. Your body's recycling broken down proteins. You are not going to do anything but thrive in life. And I didn't know this till I got closer to my late 30s, before I would stumble upon this gift that I wish someone would have given me when I was younger. I ate like six meals a day for years. Food prepping, trying to have the perfect body, all this shit. I have the best body in my life and I ate one meal a day. I drink three protein shakes a day. It's that simple. Like, I make it so simple now. And guess what? Autophagy preserves my muscles in ways that I would have never imagined. So, like, I've solved a lot of the checkboxes in life about how to be efficient, how to be efficient, how to be efficient so that I can go perform in the marketplace and not stress about breakfast or lunch. You know, people see like, stress and, oh, we got to eat. Why we Got to eat. And then people take it to the. To the next level. They need to have a drink. We. Let's have a cocktail. Like, what? Why? What the fuck? Like, how is that going to be something in this moment that makes sense right now? Like, like, keyboard bizarre to me.

Oh, I so appreciate that. And I'm going to connect this back to what we were just talking about. But I do want to add in there, especially for my ladies who are like, I don't want to go hunting. Like, that's. I don't. Like, I don't want to be hungry to go hunting. Here's what I will tell you. What it means for me is, like, I don't. Because I don't experience that. So I don't experience, like, I'm hungry, I'm gonna go hunt. Like, I don't ever experience that. And I eat the same as you. I have actually two protein shakes a day and one meal.

I do. I do three.

I know. You said that.

So we're close.

Yeah, we're close. We're close. But you. You probably need much more protein than I do. But I experience. When I feel the hunger, I experience deferral of gratifications. Like, these are the things that I align with. Does this make sense, Eric? Like, when it comes up, I'm like, for me, I'm stepping into patience. I'm stepping into, like, I'm not giving into an impulse of immediate gratification to just go, like, eat something right opposite. So that's more for what I experience. And like, the hunting, I. I experience gratitude for, like, simplicity and, like, also this, like, feeling of, like, enough. Like, I don't need all that. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know. It's just this, like, it's a very. It's a different experience for me, but we have the same philosophy. But I wanted to just offer that for someone who, like, I do think, and I do think that there is such a biological part of it where, like, you are ready to go hunting. For me, I. I don't actually experience much as, like, just this, like, connection to self, this patience, this discipline, this gratitude. And like, Normalista, you're stronger than your impulses. Right?

I agree. Yeah. And there's a. There's. There's a thing you could pair with that, with the hunting that is, I think, connection to what you're saying, and that is to show up as the best mother, the best friend, the best husband, the best wife, the best entrepreneur, the best worker, whatever you do. The worst version of you is when you just slammed a bunch of food because you get tired. Your body goes into a state where it's trying to break down all that people biologically don't understand what's happening. When you take in a big meal, you do that right at. You do that the first thing in the morning. You've already setting yourself up for, like, a real sleepy day. Like, I just see how food affects people. I watch it all the time. I travel all the time. I'm on a plane last night with everyone, and everyone in the front of that plane's drinking cocktails. Guy next to me had three Tito's bottles all lined up right next to me. And I'm just watching him thinking, like. And comes the food. And it's just like, people don't understand what they're doing. So, again, being a hungry hunter, however you want to hunt life, if you want to hunt as a better mother, a better husband, a better father, it doesn't matter what. It doesn't necessarily mean money in the marketplace. But you do show up differently when you've delayed the gratification of eating all day. And it's just something about. I've connected it to performance. Like, literally, performance as a human. Like, it is so freeing to not stress about that. That thing that everyone seems to be stressed about. I watch people stress about food all day, and they've missed the mindset connection to a greater version of themselves. And our ancestors didn't eat every time they had an itch. You know what I mean?

And it's a business. Like, let's be honest, it's a business, but, like, the food industry, right? I mean, it's all. It's all. They have great pr. We're both entrepreneurs. They have. The food industry's got amazing pr. Like, you look back at the got mills, you know, like, come on, you know.

Well, they're. They're killing. They're killing Americans, actually. You know, I just think we have the worst food standards in any in the world, at least in Canada. Even in Canada, which is a shitty country as far as how they're politically ran. But even their food standards there, it's like real food. There's a lot more chemicals in your food than you would realize. And that's why we have a masculinity problem. You're seeing, literally, masculinity being stripped through food and chemicals. These men don't have literally grown men who are 25 years old have zero testosterone. You're just seeing. You're seeing the problem. That's happening from the addictive chemicals that are in food. That bag of chips, the reason you want to keep eating it, you're never satiated, is because it's chemicals. That's like, we are killing Americans and no one's talking about this. So what I do is this. I break it down to performance. Food and performance, they go hand in hand. If you don't eat right, you can't perform right. How are you going to perform against someone that feels amazing, that's passionate, and they love what they do? Like, to get this part right, you better get the food right, too, because if you're eating the wrong thing all day, you're going to feel like. And you got to go against people that are savages in the marketplace. If you really want to win at the highest levels, you have to go against. There's, trust me, there's market share that's being stolen from you because you don't feel good. You're sleepy and you're tired all day. I listen, and I hate to say, like, I'm never tired. I remember old versions of me that seemed to be tired all the time, and I have to fight through it because I'm very disciplined. But I look at all the fucking meals that I'm eating, and now I connect. I was like, that's what it was all day. I was eating. And again, like, if we're trying to give value to the audience, what's the greatest thing that they may take from this? What if the one thing they take is, hey, they go. They go recheck their reality of what they eat every day, and they now they connect it to performance in the marketplace. I do this with entrepreneurs all the time. And once they get through the period where the toxins that get released from their bloodstream or get released in their bloodstream from the fat that is now being burned in ketosis, once they get through that period of time, they feel incredible. And when you feel incredible, you're more likely to be courageous, take risks, go start a business, go be a business, go do something scary, say something on social media, something you're normally afraid to do. You just start thriving more in life when you feel good. And if the greatest gift Melissa, me and you can give humanity is if the one thing they can really practically take from us is figure out how to feel good, go get your blood work, see how bad you are, get in alignment with your health. Then you can get alignment with the greatest spirit that you have to offer the world. Like, if your body, mind, and spirit aren't in alignment, then you're going to wander through life stuck. It's very hard to get unstuck. In nine out of ten people I meet, they will tell you that they feel stuck. It is so common to hear that. And it's because they're not in alignment. Their mind, their body and their spirit are not in alignment. You add that fourth element of really thriving financially and is a deadly weapon because now you feel free and you feel like you could do anything. Do you know how contagious, contagious this energy is?

Yeah, believe me, I know. Well, you think I've stuck around, so, I mean, I also think that there's something really powerful there. One, obviously, we're both very passionate about this. You know, my whole study of gut health came after Layden died.

Amazing.

So, like, powerful. I do think it is an important message that is related to a bigger picture of like, yes, we take health for granted. And you know why?

You can't win without it. Why would you want to win without it? If you. You don't have health, you don't have nothing. People aren't thinking about their deathbed. They're not thinking about the cardiac event that's about to happen, the disease that's about to happen. We all have bad news coming, coming, and we all are in control of much more than we think. I had on my podcast yesterday one of the most incredible guests who beat cancer at 26 years old when he got it holistically. He's written three books and he's written a cookbook, but he beat it holistically. He re engaged my mind to something that was so powerful. And that's probably why I'm bringing it up right now. It was that reminder. You can't try to give value to the world and help people thrive financially, mentally, spiritually, if you're allowing them to kill themselves on a regular basis with the shit they put in their mouth. And trust me, the chemicals you're eating in those Doritos are killing you. The soda that you just got is killing you. Like you don't realize it. It is stealing your ability to be the greatest human you can be. It's only when you feel good and there's no inflammation in your body. You have mental clarity and you're full of energy that you can see what you can do in this life. I'm convinced it's very hard to flex in a way that really matters if you're plagued with disease.

Yeah, no, I agree. And I really think that the shift. I mean, look, there's an unprogramming that needs to be done. But I think people often associate, you know, well, the Doritos are bad because of the calories. No, no, no, no. It's the chemicals. And so really garbage. And like, honestly, a lot of we have such limiting beliefs. Like, I had someone, you know, I'm 40. We discussed this. I'm 40 as well. I'm probably in the best shape of my life. And you are like. And, you know, I've had someone. I've literally had people say to me, like, you know, well, wait until you're 40 and your body's going to change. And I'm like, I am 40.

40. I hear that. I've heard that too. Yeah.

Yeah. Or wait until you have kids. And I'm like, I've birthed child.

Yeah.

You know, like, and what's really interesting is, like, when I was pregnant with Layden, I was so afraid of having stretch marks. And then after she died, I was like, oh, I kind of actually wish I had stretch marks because it was like, there was no evidence. You know what I mean? And now I'm at a place where, like, I don't need the evidence on my body that I had leave in, like, she's in my soul, she's in my heart. You know, like, I'm glad I don't have them. But, you know, people have all these limiting beliefs about what health needs to look like, our body needs to look like. And we're two people who are, you know, on the prime at 40.

You know what? You. You told me something profound. You. You told me you had these limiting beliefs that were stopping you from reaching your fullest potential. And I thought they were really good. I think you should share this with your audience. Is when Laden passed away and you finally started, I think it was probably around the time you started finally coming to the realization that you need to do something with your life that matters. Instead of wallow in your sorrows and your grief, you have to turn, convert this energy and something matters. But you had all these imposter thoughts and all these stories you were telling yourself that I thought were super profound that were actually holding you back, like, well, what are people are going to think? I'm building a business off of lay. Like, all these crazy thoughts that were real for you that actually could have easily stopped you from doing the thing. But you know how many people out in the marketplace are telling themselves a story about something that's holding them back? And that is the. Imagine if you would have actually listened to that voice. I don't know if you could speak to that for a minute because I think that was really profound.

Thank you so much for tuning in and sharing the space of scar tissue with me. I hope you found value in this episode. It is truly my commitment and goal to bring what I believe will serve you in your life no matter what you're navigating. Again, this show is inspired from the loss of my daughter Layden and through my grief journey. Really understanding empathy, understanding empowerment, understanding how to be the creators of our lives in whole new way that is stronger than circumstance, that focuses on progress not perfection, that loves the process, loves the process and lets go of attachment to outcome.

So whatever resonated the most with you.

Allow that to serve you and you elevating to your next level.

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