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I Spent $150 To Impress People Who Didn't Even Know I Was Struggling

22 Aug 2026 · 2 min

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1:45

In this monologue, Melissa Dlugolecki recounts a 2013 episode when she was financially broke, lacked a driver’s license, and took a taxi to a grocery store solely to buy ingredients for a lobster mac and cheese side dish for a potluck. She spent over $150 on the dish, hoping the effort would earn her social validation. Reflecting on the experience, she connects her past need for external approval to a broader adult pattern of seeking worth through costly symbols—cars, relationships, social media followers. She argues that many people act without understanding their underlying "why," leading to wasted effort and misplaced self‑esteem. Melissa contrasts that past mindset with her current approach: she now outsources tasks, values her time highly, and no longer ties her self‑worth to material spending. The narrative serves as a cautionary reflection on self‑worth, the pursuit of validation, and the importance of purpose‑driven actions.

Chapters

Version of Melissa in somewhere around there, 2013, broke. Took a taxi to the grocery store because I couldn't drive a car and I had no money. Took a taxi to the grocery store, not to buy groceries for myself, but because I was going to a potluck, a party. Didn't buy like a box of brownies. I spent over $90 to make a lobster mac and cheese. To be the person and then taxi back. So now we're talking the broke girl with no license is spending $150 to bring a fucking side dish to a party. I had no self-worth. My validation came from somebody being pleased with me for bringing a lobster macaroni and cheese. How sad is that? Like, that's sad. But I see that in just higher manifestations. Of adults. Like, I was a kid then, but like of adults and people chasing the things like, well, if I spend this much time and money to get that car or the big boob girlfriend or this many follows on Instagram, now I'm happy. Now I'm worthy. Now I'm validated. And I think what's missing, to answer your question, is that so many people don't know their why. Why are you doing what you're doing? Why are you, why are you taking tax stimulus so that you can go make that macaroni and cheese to then make, talk about the hours. I don't spend 5 hours a week cooking, never mind 5 hours in one day. I don't cook. I outsource everything. My time is too valuable. Like, at the time I didn't know any, I had no self-worth.