Melissa Dlugolecki compares grief to marathon training: you don't run 26.2 miles on day one. Grief doesn't get easier each year, but you build endurance and confidence to carry it. The work is choosing to strengthen yourself, not waiting for the pain to fade.
My point is I compare marathon to grief a lot. You start with 1 mile, then you get to 2. You don't start with 26. And your second marathon, your second year, isn't any easier. It's no less than 26.2 miles. And Heartbreak Hill in Boston doesn't get any less steep. What changes is that you've built trust and confidence that you can get through. Because your first time, you don't know if you're gonna survive and you wanna quit. So I actually don't believe that grief gets easier with time. I believe we build trust and endurance and a muscle to navigate it when we choose to.
