Chat LIVE With Ralph (DSO)!

Unmute my microphone. Hello folks, how you guys doing today? Good, good, glad to hear it. Let me, uh, I just got a note here saying that, uh, the This is not going live for some reason on the Help for Men Facebook page, so sorry about that, guys. Um, a second. I don't know what to do here. This is annoying. Uh, yeah, I don't know. It appears I'm on— I don't know which Facebook I'm on here. I could always just shut up and go look, right? Let me go see, shall I? Yeah, it looks like I'm good on the Dad Starting Over 1, which is our most popular one. So good. All right, sorry for the, the rough start there, folks, but okay, we're going to talk about that. There we go, get rid of that. All right, I was just exporting a video here and it started up on me. All right, let's do that again, shall we? Take 2. Hello folks, it's your boy Raffalito here live once again. With you fine folks. Uh, if you are brand new to this and you're like, who the hell is this bald idiot? Uh, my name is Ralph Brewer Brewer Brewer. I've been putting out content for years under the name of Dad Starting Over. I've written several books, the most popular of which is a book called The Dead Bedroom Fix. That brings a lot of you guys to my material, so welcome readers of that book. Uh, other books that I've written include Divorce Panic— that's my number 2 most popular— Real Talk: No Bullshit Life Advice for Young Men, and, uh, Red Flags: So if you've seen any of those, or read any of those books rather, let me know. Give me a holler on the old comments there. Would love to hear from you. As always, let me know where you guys are joining me from. Always good to see where everybody's at in the world and, uh, all the four corners— far, far corners of the world that we, uh, you know, bring into, uh, our little Dad Starting Over and Help for Men world here. Mr. Blake says the book is on point, Dead Bedroom Fix. Well, thank you, brother. Appreciate that. That's Blake from Facebook, and he says Clacton-on-Sea, Essex. Well, I know exactly where that's at. No, I have no idea where that's— sorry, Mr. Blake. Uh, maybe you could explain for us geographically, uh, what do you call it, challenged people— Americans, in other words. Um, you know, I've been several places on the planet Earth, but I have not been to Clacton-on-Sea, Essex. In the UK. I, I figured as much in the UK. So whereabouts in the UK? You know, it's just Clacton, CSX sounds very United Kingdom. And then we have Mr. Graham from Australia. He says 5:05 AM. Well, welcome, Mr. Graham, super early in the morning. Graham on Facebook, thank you so much for joining us today. I appreciate you and everybody joining us here today. Uh, Graham is near Melbourne. Very good. And for all of you that are joining me here today, if you could take a moment literally one little moment, put your little mouse pointer or your finger, wherever, however you're watching this, on, uh, on the like button. Hit the old like on this. That tells the world that this is worth other people seeing, and other people will see this. So give me a like if you could, please. I would greatly appreciate it. Um, anyway, back to my little intro here. Dad starting over, wrote a bunch of books. Uh, as of Scotland, says Real Paul, very good. As of a couple years ago now, um, we started a brand organization, everyone call it a large organization called Help for Men. You can see a little, little logo there behind my head. Um, Help for Men— Help for Men, excuse me— is our, uh, I should say parent organization. Dad Starting Over is a just a content creation brand that I've been doing for years and years. But we have Help for Men. You can buy all our books, courses. There's articles, videos on there. Um, what else we have on there? The Brotherhood, which is our private organization for men only. I always push this because, guys, not enough of you are in this group. And the reason I started this group was to help dudes like you. Yes, dude, if you're watching this, it probably would be a good thing for you. I'm a little biased being the guy who started the group, but it's called The Brotherhood. You can learn more at help4men.com/join. As we say— wrong hand— as we say right there, see that little thing in there? Help4men.com/join. Check that out. It's a private community just for men. We get together for live Zoom meetings. We have private discussion forums. Again, private, private, private. Nobody else can see what it is you're typing. No ladies in your world can see what it is you're doing. It's all private for men only. And, uh, the Zoom meetings, I totaled mine up, I have like, um, 15 meetings this week alone myself. And then we have other men on the team, Jason, Austin, Vance, Gustavo, uh, who else, Scott, um, they all have their own meetings as well. They all host their own meetings. So lots of meetings live, usually an hour or more throughout the, throughout the month there. And we record all of them. So if you're like most guys and you miss a live meeting but you want to listen back to it, you can. We record all those meetings and we put them up on a, like, a podcast feed just for our members. They subscribe to it and you can add it to your phone or stream it right there on our website at help4men.com once you're logged in. So really good stuff there. And then we do one-on-one coaching. Way cheaper for the members than it is for the general public. And, uh, the courses I mentioned, some of them are free, some way discounted. And then we do get together in person, and we are having our 6th— that's always hard for me to say— 6th annual conference, and it's going to be next year in 2026, Louisville, Kentucky. So we're going to have that in the States. And then we've just announced, um, our guys in Australia— Graeme, we have our guys in Australia get together for a smaller version of BroFest, is what we call our over here stateside are gathering every year. We call it Bro Fest. The guys in Australia call it Mate Fest. Get it? And so, um, they're going to be getting together here in October of this year, March next year for us in the stateside, Bro Fest in Louisville. So we got a lot going on, guys. We'd love for you to be a part of it. It's fun, it's exciting, it's cool. We, you know, we have guys just talking about all kinds of issues. We had a really deep conversation today at noon noon Eastern time, my time, uh, here today on Zoom. We had a gentleman who was brand new to our group who came with a story basically of a wife who kind of lost her marbles. You know, that's a technical term, isn't it? Lost her marbles, um, emotionally, mentally going through a lot. And that, uh, manifested itself in the form of physical abuse towards him, threatening physical abuse, using deadly weapons. Scary stuff. So he had to call the police, and it happened multiple times if I'm remembering right. And he had to be protective of his child and scary stuff. And he came to our group with that. And, uh, you know, I love our group. We have so many good dudes in there being very supportive, giving advice, been through something similar, all that good stuff. So, um, that's just one aspect of the group, and we talk about all kinds of stuff. You know, the most popular thing I've ever done was the, the Dead Bedroom Fix book, and that is a lot of our conversation. Guys in long-term monogamous relationships, marriages, and they're having a really tough time with, you you know, how to keep the love life going, or the wife just seemed to shut down as soon as we had kids, and you know, the wife is dealing with depression, anxiety, and she can't function, and I can't function. We hear it all, dude. So check it out, the Brotherhood, as the little thingy there shows, help4men.com/join, in case this wasn't obvious enough here in the corner. Check it out, guys. Uh, I'll put it in the comments so you guys can just click on it there, but we need more of you in there. I hear that. I see a lot of the same names again and again on these lives. I see a lot of the, uh, same names again and again in the comments on my videos. And I just want to shake the guys by the shoulders and say, I hear a lot of you guys complain about the same shit day after day in my videos and my lives. And come on, guys, we talk about this stuff in the group. Come join the group. But that's— it's tough for a lot of guys, I guess, to bare their soul, if you will, and It's, it's easier to hide behind the anonymity, if you will, although your name's attached to it, of, uh, you know, putting comments on a video or coming on live and leaving comments versus actually going to a group and talking about this kind of stuff and really resolving issues. As much as we all say we want to fix issues, there's a lot of comfort in the, um, repeat, uh, oh, suffering, if you will, over and over again from the same problem. Feels comfortable to you, especially us that have been in that came from really dysfunctional childhoods, really unhealthy childhoods. That discomfort, that chaos feels familiar, doesn't it? And, uh, to say, you know, you actually have control over that and you can make that go away, then your shitty relationship, um, via change, work, or, you know, leaving that relationship— a lot of guys are like, uh, no, I think I'll stick to complaining about it for the next 20 years. Okay, it's not really doing anybody any good. But, um, for those that want to take a left turn, do something different, the group help4men.com/join. Learn more about the brotherhood. Enough about that. We got Mr. Graham saying you've listened to The Dead Bedroom Fix twice. Well, cool. Uh, my, my— there we go, it was truncating there. Well worth the read and listen. Thank you, Graham. I appreciate that, buddy. Appreciate that, appreciate that a lot. Can't talk today. I think too much caffeine is my problem today, so bear with me as I stumble over my words. Here's the Cracking open the Pepsi. There you go. How about that? Ah, so guys, how these things work is that I, uh, I get on here and I don't like to listen to myself babble. I do that enough. Uh, there are literally thousands of little video clips of me, hundreds of full-blown videos of me on YouTube. Do a search for Dad Starting Over, or I could just put it in the link here, youtube.com/dadstartingover. Most of our videos are there, as well as a, uh, it's thinking, thinking. There we go. There are my two YouTube channels. We got youtube.com/, uh, you can use a little or not for Dad Starting Over, as well as youtube.com/@realhelpformen. Two YouTube channels that I put out there, a lot of content, especially the Dad Starting Over one is updated, uh, 3 days a week with a long-form video. And then a lot of little shorts in there every day. So check it out. Um, those are channels that I'm really trying like hell to grow. So if you like my stuff and you like the— what I got to say about stuff, then check those out. Would love to see more folks on there. Give me more likes and shares and comments on YouTube. Appreciate it. But anyway, back to this. Um, guys, got any questions, comments for yours truly? Like to hear me pontificate on stuff? Would like to talk things over? Leave a little comment here for me. I will read it for everybody here. For those that are watching on the recording later, yes, these are recorded and archived by YouTube and Facebook automatically. Sometimes I take clips of these and put them up for the world to see, but we'll see. So, uh, but every now and then I'll do one of these and no one says anything except hello, and that's cool, you know. No one's holding a gun to your head. You don't have to say anything today, but that's what these are for, giving back, if you will. If you see some value to me spewing stuff and you're like, I like to hear this guy talk about something in particular, let me know. I am more than happy to do so. While I take a sip of my Pepsi, talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic: the Holy Roman Empire was neither holy nor Roman. Discuss. Saturday Night Live thing. Uh, Graham says, I listen to you on Spotify as I drive a lot to work. Oh, drive a lot, work. Uh, hearing fellow men going through the same stuff, great therapy. I'm in a much better place. Well, I'm glad to hear it, Mr. Graham. Thank you so much, buddy. I appreciate the kind words, that means a lot to me. Spotify, yeah, That's Starting Over podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, wherever you may listen to your podcasts, as I say in my videos. Um, uh, Spotify, if you are a member of Spotify Premium, you know, you pay them monthly, not just listen to the ads and all that stuff on Spotify, um, I think you get all of my audiobooks included with that. So do a search for, um, Dead Bedroom Fix. If you're Spotify Premium, boom, get to listen to it. Yeah, I get a few pennies every time you listen to it. Not much, but it adds up. Um, I think my record is I had 6,000 people in one month, um, listening to the Dead Bedroom Fix on Spotify. Pretty cool, right? Um, that's an unusually big spike for me, but it adds up, puts some money in my pocket, so I appreciate that. Um, just do a search for Dead Bedroom Fix on Spotify Premium or, uh Divorce Panic or Real Talk Dad Starting Over, you'll probably find me on there. But, uh, thank you to Graham and others. Guys, anything else? Any other questions? Kind of a small group, I guess you could say, here today. Uh, viewer audience— there's the term I'll look for— small audience here today, but that's okay. Tuesday at, uh, 3 PM my time. Maybe it's not the best time in the world, but It's the only time I had guys, gals, to join you. Speaking of gals, please don't be shy, ladies. If you're watching this and you're like, there's that bald idiot I saw in the video, I'd like to ask him a question or let him— give him a piece of my mind, hey, please do so. We're not averse to the ladies. Some guys in my video comments don't like the ladies a lot because they've been hurt by women repeatedly, usually not very good. But, um, for, uh, uh, but I, I, you know, I'm open to the ladies. Welcome, anything you want to say. The Dad Starting Over, uh, page on Facebook is a page, it's not a group. Means it's public. Anybody can say anything. Just like any company or organization puts a page out there, you can get on there and say, 'You suck.' Fine, cool. So, uh, men often get on there and say, 'What are these ladies doing on this?' Guys, it's a page, it's not a group. Anyone can come and say whatever they want. So, uh, ladies, if you have anything to ask of yours truly or whatever, please go right ahead. Oh, we got a big one here. Oh, Mr. Ryan White from Facebook says, 'My fiancée's daughter Let me redo that because I may cut this into a clip. I don't want your full name. Mr. Ryan from Facebook asks, my fiancée's daughter was engaged and started going through a lot of stress with this boy. He grew up LDS— that means Latter-day Saints, he's a Mormon— uh, and was being super controlling and started to become abusive. Uh-oh. The cops got called on him by his neighbor at the apartment complex, and she finally realized it was time to break away. She had a hard time not going back to him though. It happened for months where she'd go back to him and then come over to us for help. When they finally broke up a few weeks ago, he reached out to me and it— it's truncating your clip, or I'm not seeing all of it. There we go. Yeah, see, you guys see the same thing there? It was— it was— it was— it was— what was it, Ryan? Please continue. Um, If I may, while we wait on the rest of that, I don't know again if your system is truncating this or if I am. Um, actually, I can go to Facebook directly and read it here. Uh, it was hard because you thought he was going to be your future son-in-law, and he reached out to you and thanked you for being there for him. And the thing I thought of him to help the most was recommending your books. So I sent him some Audible links and told him it's what changed me and helped me become a better man. Oh, that's awesome. Thank you. So I could finally meet the love of my life and not mess it up. I hope you read it, uh, and helps him— like, you hope that he reads it and helps him like it helped you. And we listen to your books every once in a while just because that's not what I grew up with, and there are so many insights that I've applied to become who I am. So much happier. Just want to say thanks again. Oh cool, Ryan, thank you, buddy. You just made my day. Thank you so much. So you had a guy who, um, your fiancée's daughter going through it with a dude. He has some obviously not very good characteristics about himself, so much that the cops got called on him and everything else. The LDS thing, um, you know, interesting little side note that you threw that in there, but let's not paint all those folks with the same brush. Mormons, um, most Mormons that I talk to, the guys that reach out to me— this isn't necessarily illustrative of Mormons as a whole, But of the guys that I talked to, quite a few Mormons have reached out to me, to be honest with you. And their flavor of problem is always— they're kind of the over-the-top Mr. Nice Guy type. And they're just very much— thanks for the religion— focused on must have family, make babies, have family, make babies. At a very early age, it seems they get started with that. And then life throws a big holy shit at them in the form of the guys that I talk to. Again, not all Mormons by any stretch of the imagination. The guys that reach out to me for help are like my wife kind of went off the rails. She's like, to hell with the Mormonism, to hell with all this, I'm doing my own thing. And he's just like, I don't know how to deal with this. And there's infidelities and all kinds of stuff. So that's not his story, but let's, you know, everybody's different, dude. It's not so much the religion, but that may, you know, contribute somewhat to the— oh, how to say this nicely— sheltered, kind of naive take on relationships in general, sexuality for sure. I've seen that a lot in relationships, a lot of Orthodox Jewish, Muslim, Christian types, and Mormons and so forth that have a really difficult time— modern-day sexuality, I guess you could say— in relationships and all that stuff. So thank you, appreciate you sharing the books. Let's hope it gets through. I hope the dude does better. And I would say to the fiancée's daughter, and let's, let's move on from this dude. Let's go on to somebody else. Homeboy ain't ready for the relationship thing yet, and she may not be either if she's getting with this guy, it's kind of abusive in nature, and then she runs back to him over and over again. She needs to cool it with that too. Um, not good, not fun. Well, just had a big jump in our viewership here. Welcome everybody. Uh, name's Ralph Brewer Brewer Brewer. You're watching me on either Dad Starting Over or Help for Men channels. I appreciate it. Thank you all for joining me here today. If you could give me a like wherever you're watching this, I would appreciate it. Give me a share, follow, subscribe. However it works. I'd appreciate it. Normally this is me just answering comments and questions from folks. We had just the one so far. I am open to anything anybody else may want to share here. All right, cool. Um, getting more little error messages, so everything's going through here. Anything else, ladies and germs? Um, I mentioned our annual gathering in the US, in the States, coming up in, uh, March of 2026. We call that BroFest. What do you guys think of that name? Kind of douchey. I struggle with it still to this day, but hey, it's— we've stuck with it. This will be the 6th year of doing this under the name BroFest. So brofest2026.com, check it out to learn more about this annual gathering we have. Uh, here's the kicker: you don't need to be a member to join us at BroFest. There is a fee involved, uh, it costs a lot of money to put on these events, um, but, uh, check it out. Brofest2026.com. We're opening it to the general public, men only, sorry ladies, hence the title Bro Fest. And, um, uh, we would love to see you. So we have speakers, we get together. It's typically, it's you have your hotel, your Airbnb, wherever you're at, and that's separate from the event space where we all get together for presentations and workshops and all that good stuff. And the presentations, workshops, and everything will be headed up by myself, other members of the Help for Men team, as well as some big names in our world. I don't know if you guys know Dr. Robert Glover. He is the author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, probably the biggest, if one of, if not the biggest self-help book ever written for men. No More Mr. Nice Guy, Dr. Robert Glover. I know him, I've worked with him, collaborated on some stuff before. We've done events together. He'll be there for the whole weekend hanging out. How cool is that? Doing presentations, hanging out, talking with us after hours, all that good stuff. You guys may know Lauren, the Dadvocate. Dadvocate. You may know the name. If you don't know the name, you probably— if you saw her face pop up, you'd say, oh yeah, I know her, I've seen her stuff. Yeah, she has bazillions of followers and put out tons of, of content out there. Millions of people all over the world have seen her. And as her name implies, she is a advocate for men's rights in the world of parenting post-divorce and everything else. She'll be with us, Lauren the Advocate, hanging out for the weekend. How cool is that? And then we have another gentleman you may not know as much, but I think he's going to grow in popularity. Just needs to put more material out there as I keep bugging him about it. Adam Nissensohn, the Betrayal Shrink. You can learn more at betrayalshrink.com. He helps out guys with overcoming, um, betrayal after being cheated on, you know, you know, the subsequent divorce and all that other nonsense. Helps out guys with that as well as sex addiction. He is certified in the world of helping people with sex addiction, men in particular. So check it out, Adam Nissensohn, the Betrayal Shrink, betrayalshrink.com. He'll be with us for the whole weekend. So we got 3 great guests, myself, other guys on the team. So check it out. And so what we normally do is we all meet in the morning early at the event space, all the presentations, then we all, you know, we have lunch there at the event space, and then we will, uh, after that break, and guys get together after hours and we hang out, you know, for drinks, dinner, all kinds of cool stuff. So we will organize some things. Everybody kind of does their own thing after that, but it's always a fun weekend. Get together, get to know a lot of guys, make a lot of really good friends for life. So check it out, brofest2026.com. Would love to have more of you guys there. And I'm going to leave this little banner up here. This is for our, uh, Brotherhood, help4men.com/join, our, uh, support community for men only. So check it out. Um, we have, uh, almost 3/4 of our membership opts for what we call the, uh, lifetime membership to the group. So they pay like a one-time fee and they're in for life. That's most guys in the group. So what happens is guys do the month-to-month thing and they're like, I don't know why I want to pay month to month for this. It's a relatively low amount, but it makes sense. I'm going to be in this for years probably, so why don't I just pay a lump sum and now I'm in for life? I don't have to worry about extra payments and all other garbage. And most guys do that. So this is a lot about our group, that guys are like, yeah, I'm in this for life. It's like a, a regular part of their day-to-day life. Log into the Brotherhood, check out the conversation. Talk to other dudes. Um, check, you know, check up on my buddy from Utah, wherever it may be. Um, this is— it's become an integral part of their life in their community, and that's— it's really huge, and I'm really proud of that. So check it out, thebrotherhoodhelpformen.com. Guys, anything else before I wrap her up today? This always happens where I'm about to wrap it up and then boom, we'll have some more comments. So now's the time for the boom, guys. If you have some comments, uh, leave them there wherever you are watching this, and I will see it show up on my screen here. Kind of cool how that works. Um, But guys, if not, it was a pleasure chatting with you again here today. Um, anything at all? Um, I don't come prepared with like, guys, this is what I want to talk and blab about. Plenty of videos out there just for that purpose of this is for me to interact with you fine folks. So, uh, always here for any kind of topics you may want to throw my way. I'll give you guys another minute or two to do so. If not Um, Graham— boy, guys, I love the accolades. Thank you so much. You say— Graham says, I'd love to publicly thank you, Ralph. Well, thank you. Thank you for thanking me. I've been a contributor to some of your previous posts. You responded a couple times. It made me look at myself and not necessarily blame my now ex-wife for our problems. Well, very good. If you remember, I seem to date unsuitable people. Get in line, buddy. Um, join the club. Uh, well, well, with cognitive therapy followed by the principles set out in The Dead Bedroom Fix, I've taken on board no more Mr. Nice Guy. Very cool. Well, you've hit all the big ones Haven't you? Um, I've spent a lot of time working on getting to value myself, and life's so much better. Let me jump over here to Facebook so I can read the rest of it. Um, uh, you're in a different and more stable relationship. Uh, the principle set out in both books, such as exercise, hanging with mates, has worked very good. Love to hear it. Thank you so much. And you know, and some people, Mr. Graham, listen to that and go, well, why wouldn't you go to the gym and hang out with dudes ahead of time, you know, already, and, um, not intertwine your life with dysfunctional, uh, toxic people, if you will, lack of a better term. And the answer to that is, if you're one of those people reading that going, this isn't any grand epiphany, it is for some folks. Um, many of us were not raised in healthy families. Many of us didn't have any kind of dynamic between a mom and dad, or a man and woman, you know, sticking to the hetero thing, um, to look at and say, oh, that's how you do it. We didn't have that at all. And so we are learning as we go as adults. And sometimes we— oftentimes we throw ourselves into relationships at a young age and it blows up in our face, and we're like, shit, I didn't see this coming. I don't know how to deal with this. I didn't get the infidelity and the crazy, you know, the 'Who knew about all this shit?' And a lot of us, a lot of people in the background going, 'We knew, dude, we told you.' It's funny when we look back on this, we did have people in our life that told us about this stuff, didn't we? Just in one ear, out the other. We didn't listen to any of that shit, but we should have. And but, you know, to give ourselves a break, we're young, stupid, in love, and we didn't have those tools in our mental toolbox, as I often say. Many of us don't, and we learn the hard way. Unfortunately. And that's what Graham here is saying, that he had to learn the hard way. And he is taking in a lot of learning, um, you know, as a guy who puts out this material. I put out books, by the way. I'm working on another book. A little, little teaser there for you. I'm not going to tell you what it's about, still working on very early stages, but we're in the process of another book. Anywho, so you've read books, listening to material, reading a lot of stuff, probably the YouTube and all that other stuff, am I right? Podcasts and everything else. Thank you, by the way, for those of you that take in all that material, because that's the kind of stuff I put out there. But to some of you, this may seem counterintuitive to a guy who makes his living putting out the stuff. Sometimes you need to ease up on that stuff, and sometimes you just need to take a break, stop and smell the roses, enjoy life, enjoy the relationship you're in, Graeme, enjoy it for what it is. And sometimes you need to take a break from the learning stuff, with the obsessive learning stuff, and just sit back and enjoy things and take in those moments. You've ever— you ever find yourself just kind of like, oh, you know, on vacation or doing something, but you're so caught up in your head with anxious thoughts and you're worried about this, you're worried about that, and you're worried about money, and you're worried about your relationship, that the vacation or whatever moment it is just passes by. And you have these family members, whoever you're on vacation with, going, you remember when? And you're like, no, I I don't remember that at all. Yeah, remember when so-and-so, when this happened and that funny thing happened? You're like, oh shit. And you're like, um, no, I don't remember at all. That's sad, isn't it? That, that's been me for a big chunk of my life, just not sitting back and just enjoying things. So that's what I'd say to a lot of you guys. Thank you for taking in the material. Um, you'll notice a lot of it is repetitive. There's a lot of stuff in the Dead Bedroom Fix that you probably find in No More Mr. Nice Guy, that you probably find in G.S. Youngblood's work. Um, masculine relationship that you'll find in this book, that you'll find in that YouTube video. Sometimes you're like, I got the core, let's build on that, let's set this stuff aside for a bit and build on it. Oftentimes guys don't focus on the community aspect of it. Let's work with other men, let's get a friend group, let's get a social group, let's be involved more in my community, let's join men's groups like the Brotherhood at help4men.com/join, um, whatever it may be. So yeah, stop and smell the roses, take a break every now and then, Graham and others. The gym, great. That's like a— the gym is, uh, Jim says, or Real Paul here says the gym is a great way to relieve the stress for him. Yeah, that's huge. It's not only just the aesthetic, you look better and, you know, you look better naked, that's a good thing. It's not just the, oh, performance issue, now I can walk longer, run faster, jump higher, lift things more. It's the mental health aspect of it is huge. How I've often framed it is the human body is not meant to be so sedentary. See what I'm doing now? I'm sitting at a desk, in case you can't tell. I sit at this desk for hours and hours and hours a day, which translates into dozens of hours every week of just sitting on my ass, which is what, hundreds of hours a month? Is that right? Yeah. Um, my body and brain like rebels against that, like, what are you doing, dude? I even have a little watch to remind me, and every now and then this little thing says, what are you doing, dude? Get up, move. You've been sitting for too long. This ain't healthy. Get up, stress— or stretch, rather— and move your body and push and pull things. Walk for long distances. Why? Because that's literally what we were engineered to do. And when you don't do that stuff, your body and brain starts rebelling against you, and it starts— you get anxious and you feel weird and you feel gross, and disease happens and obesity and all kinds of nastiness just because you're eat too much and don't move enough. So a lot of it starts with get up and move, dude. Walk. Graham's here saying you walk most mornings. That's, that's like the basic get up and walk. Huge. Life is all about balance, he says. Absolutely. Um, don't discount Graham and others, especially as men and women for that matter, but this is a material for men mostly. Um, resistance exercise is huge. Gym, lift weights, the machines, the free weights, all that stuff. You don't have to be Mr. Bodybuilder Dude and go all out, but that pushing and pulling heavy things, grunting and sweating to the point of exhaustion— don't have to go all out 100% of the time. In fact, we have a coach on our staff at Alpha Men, Coach Vance, Olympic weightlifting coach, PhD, knows this stuff inside and out. He would tell you that there's something about, um, this concept of periodization. Which is a scheduled, regimented, calculated form of resistance exercise. And others, which is like, some weeks you ease up a little bit, don't go all out, but you still go through the motions. And other weeks, this is the week where I really go all out, really push yourself to the limit, see how much you can bench press and squat and whatever it may be. And other weeks, it's kind of a moderate week, and you're going almost to the level or to the limit of pushing yourself to the max, but not quite. That's periodization. It's something that was, uh, uh, really put to the forefront by the Russians. The Russians were really on top of this for years, and that's why they were beating the pants off of us in the Olympics for years. But anyway, but I digress. Don't discount the importance of getting to the gym and pushing and pulling heavy things. Huge, hugely important. Don't discount the cardiovascular thing. Yes, if it sounds like this is going to take hours of my life every week, it sure does. What's the alternative? Sit on your couch scrolling your phone? That time should be walking. Listen to your podcast, listen to your audiobook, or nothing, and zone out and just enjoy nature, whatever it may be. Huge, huge, huge. Spot on, says Mr. Uh, Real Paul. I keep wanting to call you Rand Paul. That's like an American politician. I don't know if you're familiar with him. I just see RP. Anyway, um, and Graham says he's off to meet his buddy for his daily walk. How awesome is that? That's— I'm proud of you, Graham. That's awesome. Good stuff, buddy. And yes, I do remember you. You've come a long way since we last, uh, chatted via the comments here. And Graham, we would love to have you in the group, the Brotherhood. Check it out. We have a lot of Aussies in there. In fact, they're getting together for their annual gathering here in a few months in October. Check it out. Um, Mr. All right guys, anything else before I wrap her up here? If not, I will say thank you and bid you adieu and say thank you so much for joining me here today. Um, do appreciate all of you. Thank you for all the likes, follows, comments, all that good stuff. Keep them coming. Dad Starting Over on YouTube, Facebook, X, what used to be called Twitter, Instagram. Help for Men, our larger organization, you can learn more at helpformen.com. By the way, if you're watching this, if you are a, um, content creator or a content creator wannabe in the men's help space, if you will. And, uh, if you'd like to be a part of Help for Men, help promote the Brotherhood, there's a financial incentive for doing so. You get rewarded every time somebody signs up. We're just trying to grow the group. I'm not trying to make millions here. We're trying to grow the group and help out thousands of men all over the world. And we need more Dad Starting Over type content creators out there to help, you know, push guys over to the Brotherhood group so we can grow the community. And we will reward you for doing so. So if that sounds like something you're kind of interested in drop me a line. You can see me on any of the social media and, you know, send me a message via any of the Dad Starting Over social media on there, the direct message. Or you can email me at ralph.b— ralph.b— at help4men.com. ralph.b@help4men.com. Send me an email and we'll chat. I already got a gentleman the other day, he emailed me and I owe him an email back. So if you're watching this, I'll get back with you. Um, but anywho, guys, thank you all so very much for joining me today. Love you all. I'll see you on the next one, which is— when's the next one going to be? Next week, Wednesday, next Wednesday on the 9th, I'll be back here same time. All right guys, thank you all so much. And oh, I lost you. Where'd my— where'd my browser go? Oh shit, I need my browser to, to end the live stream. All right, cool, there it is. All right guys, toodaloo.