Single Mothers And "Emotional Incest"

Oh yeah, one of the, uh, one of the most low-key but insidious things that I see is, uh, dad took off or it was a contentious divorce or whatever, but for whatever reason I have very little, if any, contact with dad. I hear that a lot from guys and they're with single mom. And what happens is for a lot of these guys, they become like surrogate husband. They're, they're, their mom's a little man. And she just dumps on him all of her emotional stuff. Here's what happened to me at work, my son. Sit down like you're my husband and listen to me emote about work. Listen to me talk about my boyfriends and my dating problems. Listen to me, listen to me, listen to me. And the more you listen to me and take in all my emotion and be my, you know, emotional safety net, son, um, the more I'm happier and I reward you. And he takes that that theme, if you will, that relationship template, and he takes it out into adulthood. And who does he meet? All these women that just need somebody to save them, all these chaotic people that just have all kinds of problems, and he's the guy who's going to swoop in to save them all. When everybody else is like, uh, no thank you, he's like, yes please, come, you know, if you got drama, I'm your man.

I've never heard of it, I've never heard that, that aspect of it, but you're 100% right. I'm sitting there listening like thinking about, because it's just a whole, right? Like, uh, fatherless homes are an issue with a lot of things. And I'm not saying single moms can't do it. I'm not saying there's— I know some great single moms that are just, that are killers, right? But all in all, you know, I think they're the exception. I think you'd agree. And, and a, a boy that's raised in a single mom household kind of thing without a strong male figure, father figure, they, they've got a deficit going. They've got a handicap for sure.