Clearing Clutter from the Inside Out - Coaching Session #1
Rick Wilkes and Carol Look lead a coaching session on decluttering, using tapping exercises to address the emotional blocks that keep people holding onto stuff: scarcity, guilt, fear. The goal is to clear space for abundance and calm.
Welcome, everyone. This is Clearing clutter from the inside out, our coaching session. Number one. I'm Rick Wilks from thrivingnow.com and I'm here with Carol look from carollook.com hi, Carol. Happy New Year.
Hi, Rick. Happy New Year. I'm excited about the year coming up.
Me too. So we've had some great questions. There's an Ask the questions. If you're on a computer, you should see a little Ask the questions right now. You see that there's a. An orange number next to it. I've got a few things to take care of with you all first before we get started. First of all, there's the ask the questions. If you type a question in there, that means that Carol and I will try to get to it. We're not going to get to all questions asked, but it gives me an idea because I'm the one who sees them and can ask the questions. There's a little upvote and both in this call and coaching session, too, you can before the call or during the call up, vote questions that are important to you. And we see that and can take that into account. You'll see that there's a chat window. If you're on an iPad or an iPhone, it may be down below the image. The chat window is for you to communicate and give us feedback. Carol and myself. It is not for talking back and forth with each other. Just to let you know that that is very hard for us to track and for other people as well. We have people from around the world that are joining us. We're part of a great group of people that are devoted to clearing their clutter. And as Rebecca said, she's been tapping and crying and clearing and tapping some more. Congratulations, Rebecca. You know, this is a safe place to acknowledge that our stuff has emotions to it. It may not make any sense to your family members or people that have judgments about your clutter. Why don't you just get rid of it all? That's not what we're about. We recognize that the things that we have, we have connections with. Sometimes those connections are positive. Oh, I love this thing. And sometimes they're like, I am so scared of dealing with that that I'm going to pile a bunch of stuff on top of it and make sure that I can't see it. There are people that can hear and there are people that cannot hear. There's a little get audio video help. Okay. If you see that, you can click it and switch to compatibility mode. If your Internet connection is not Producing. Also, check your volume, make sure that you're seeing it. We're definitely transmitting right now. And so if for some reason you're not getting the audio, there will be a replay and the audio will be there. So, Carol, do you want to say something while I just quickly take care of some things here?
That was a good message. Carol P. Said, I refreshed stream and got audio. I think a theme that I certainly have gotten out of the program, Rick, the new program that you and I did is really this idea of what do we want in our lives? What kind of space are we trying to create for ourselves? And I have been doing a massive clutter cleanup for the last three months that was part of this program. And really it is about that notion of space. What kind of stillness do I want instead? Oh, stillness scares you. That's good to know. What kind of space do I want on my desk? That scares you. Good to know. So this is why we're tapping on the stuff, the emotions about the stuff, because you can get rid of the stuff and two weeks later it'll be all built up back on your desk or in your purse or your car. So keep thinking about, what am I afraid of? Is it about loss? Is it about grief? Is it about fear? Is it about love? What's really going on that connects you, glues you to your stuff? Because it's not about the stuff. We know that it is not about your stuff. It's about releasing and healing the emotional conflicts you have and the meaning you attach to your stuff. So just keep that in mind, everybody. What am I attached to that I'm not willing to let go of? That I'm afraid to let go of? Why is this book, this sweater, this piece of paper, why is this all so important? What does it mean? Because that's what we're going to tap through. And that those of you I know, most of you have started the program, some of you have waited, then that's fine. But you'll be hearing a lot of that and a lot of tapping through the modules, Right?
Okay. So just a reminder again, we have the ask a Question section. Carol and I will be going through answering your questions and doing some tapping as well. As Nancy said, I don't have to do it. All right now turned into doing just a little, then doing some more, just to start. Remember that we're not suggesting that you go through these big upheavals of clearing that we want you to get to a place where you can easily and naturally do a five minute segment. And so as you think about these questions, these things that come up, tune into what might I do with five minutes that I'm scared to do that I feel resistance to do that I have some kind of objection in my body mind around it. All right, so I'm going to ask questions. Rebecca asked Carol. I'm sure this is connected to my clutter and scarcity issues, but I'm not getting clarity on how it's blocking my abundance and ability to earn more than a poverty level income. It's frustrating because I desperately need to get some self care, such as car repairs and dental work that is very expensive. But I know my financial situation isn't going to change until I deal with the underlying emotions and clean up the mess in my paperwork.
Awesome. Rebecca. Two things strike me, hit me, come through me. One, expansiveness. When you have too much paperwork around you, there's no room, there's no space, there's no space for abundance. And when you devalue your skill set and don't think you have enough to offer and you can only earn a poverty level or, you know, a certain amount of money, that's also a shrinking and a limitation. So I would say going through either of those doors, I'm squishing myself. I'm making myself small. I bet even if that first part didn't get to you, something's going to come of that. Because I know you're more talented than you're giving yourself credit for. Because I know that even though I don't know you, because I know we all are. And this idea of having to be safe with your stuff around you, so something about you doesn't want to step out and stand out, I would say. Now, I think if we did a tapping on this, Rick, we could do this would help everybody. A very quick. I'm afraid to stand tall and stand out. I think that because why else would you be sitting in a room with so much stuff? There's no room for you to stand up, right.
With an intention that you're going to clear some space for abundance. I think that's one of the perfect tie ins with your work, Carol, is that by creating some spaciousness in our physical world, we're creating energetic space for abundance.
Good karate, Chandra. Yes. All right. Even though I haven't allowed myself to expand.
Even though I haven't allowed myself.
To expand, no wonder I'm putting a lid on my abundance.
No wonder I'm putting a lid on my abundance.
I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
I deeply and Profoundly love and accept myself.
Even though my clutter is just an expression of devaluing myself.
Even though my clutter is just an expression of devaluing myself.
I accept who I am anyway.
I accept who I am anyway.
Eyebrow. I choose to expand who I am.
I choose to expand who I am.
Side of the eye. But I need the space to expand.
Wow. Do I need the space to expand.
Under the eye, I need the self love expand.
I need the self love to expand.
Under the nose, I feel I need the self acceptance to expand.
I need the self acceptance to expand.
Chin point. It's not about my paperwork.
It is not about my paperwork.
Collarbone. I'm using the paperwork to keep myself small.
I'm using the paperwork to keep myself small.
Under the arm. I know I have more to offer.
Know I have more to offer.
Top of that. And I choose to believe in who I am.
And I choose to believe in who I am.
Good. And a deep breath. Now, some people might be saying, what does that have to do with clutter? It does. Our self esteem is intimately entwined with clutter. But for her, for Rebecca, the paperwork is just a symbol. It's all just a symbol. Being an underachiever is just a symbol. It's a symbol of what? Not totally owning, accepting, and loving who you are as you are with all of your talents.
Yeah. And notice that when I was tapping just a tip for people, bring it in to your body. You notice I close my eyes and I said the things that really mean something to me with emphasis, Allowing the words and the vibration to seep into my bones and my tissues and my heart. By doing that, you're shifting your vibration with more intention, you know, people you can tap and not even really be connected to it like. And so I'm encouraging you. If you've already looked at Facebook a couple times and checked your phone when you didn't need to, why don't you set those aside, even if it's uncomfortable right now? And let's get to another question. Thank you, Carol. Right. Paperwork in files. I am writing a book, Mark two of life story. I'm afraid that if I lose paperwork, I won't have accurate dates, etc. To write the story accurately. It is a real fear losing my personal history and not being able to pass it on to those who come after me. So one of the things that's clear to me reading that is that fear of losing your personal history. And that's where I think I would start, because you're writing a memoir and it's important to you. You're clearly being inspired and driven. And there's also a fear component. So, yes, you need materials. You'll need things to be able to do a writing project. Writing projects have paper. Those are not clutter unless there's fear or confusion or something else around it. So for each of us, take something that you have in your world that you have some fear of loss around. Fear of loss is sort of a fear of missing out, right? And for this person who asked the question, feel into the fear of people not remembering you not having that to pass on. Okay. And you don't have to get the words right, everyone. But it's really useful to get the feeling, like, as you're tuning to it, what happens? Like, for me, I start feeling this choking kind of loss in my throat. It may be in your gut, it may be in your feet. Go cold. There's no right or wrong. And if you can't feel anything from the head down, that's your symptom, right? It's like, oh, I've gone blank from the head down. So let's do some tapping. Even though I have this fear of loss in my body, Even though I.
Have this fear of loss in my.
Body and I feel it, and I feel it, and it makes me scared to let go of things.
And it makes me scared to let.
Go of things, it makes me unclear.
It makes me unclear.
I do need some of this material to do what I want.
I do need some of this material to do what I want.
But I probably don't need everything.
But I probably don't need everything.
And I'm definitely willing to let go.
Of the fear and I'm definitely willing to let go of the fear.
Eyebrow. This fear of loss.
This fear of loss side of the eye.
Wow, it's stronger than I expected.
Wow, it's stronger than I expected.
Under the eye. This fear of loss.
This fear of loss Knows.
This fear of loss in my body.
This fear of loss in my body.
And this remaining fear of loss in my body.
This remaining fear of loss in my body.
This anxiety about losing things.
This anxiety about losing things.
Even losing my life and all the.
Memories Even losing my life and all.
The memories under the arm. This fear of loss in my body.
This fear of loss in my body.
Top head. And I've decided to let go of.
That fear and I've decided to let.
Go of that fear and have clarity about what to keep and what to let go.
And have clarity about what to keep and what to let go Take a.
Deep breath and tune again into those papers. What is it that evokes a fear of loss? Carol, do you have anything you wanted to add to that?
Well, just my feeling. Just because it was a different place, it was a little panicky and it was right in the center of my chest, almost right behind my thymus. Thymus gland there. And I would just say it's the clarity that makes the difference. I have thrown out three bags of books or I'm preparing them to give away because I got clear. Am I ever really going to read this? Nope. Am I going to read. I might read this one. Hold on. Am I going to read this? Nope. Didn't like the first chapter anyway. That's why it's still on my shelf. And it's the clarity rather than that fuzz. So when you were saying I choose to get clear about what to keep. She doesn't have to throw everything out. We're not talking about throwing everything out. We're talking about making really wise choices for the space that we choose to live in. It's 2018. I'm done with this stuff. I am so done with being crowded out. That's back to the first woman. Was it Rebecca? About being crowded out by the paperwork. It's a good phrase, I think.
Okay. And if you can hear me but you can't hear Carol, try resetting. Just refresh the page. Or you can also go to the get audio video help and click on that. And yes, it is about having clarity about what we want and what we don't want. Remember our definition of clutter. You can have a lot of things and if there's a harmony and a right sizedness about it, you're not distressed. It doesn't cause you distraction from the things that you're really wanting to create and have in your life. It's not clutter, but we come together with stuff that, yeah, is distracting us. And let's go on to the next question.
Harmony. Great theme, Rick. Great theme.
Okay, so while I'm in action, I'm not going to be able to quote Magic wand my environment overnight. What can I do to turn the volume down on my distress and create some serenity in the meantime? Thank you. Helen, What a great question. I know that that affects all of us that have more do than what we're going to just like suddenly have cleaned up. Carol, what would you say?
I would say, Helen, make it a fun project. Make it. Oh, exciting. I'm going to do five minutes today, 10 minutes tomorrow, five minutes on Friday. Make it a game so that it's not such a burden. Okay? Now we know with tapping, no matter what problem we're talking about, when we get ourselves more neutral on the fear or the emotions, and then we can start to make decisions. So it's very important to tap for neutrality and just serenity every day anyway, because then you can. Then you look at the book or you look at the sweater and you say, why was I holding onto that? Don't ask. Doesn't matter. And you can let go of it nicely and cleanly and give it to someone else. So harmony. And she used the word. Helen used the word. What she used. Not peace. Serenity. We want that. Because when we're not there, we know that our monkey mind has gone bananas. So we want to quiet that down. So try this, everybody. Even though I'm agitated by my clutter.
Even though I'm agitated by this clutter.
Even though I'm working on it, even.
Though I'm working on it, I accept.
Who I am and how I feel.
I accept who I am and how I feel.
Even though my remaining clutter makes me feel. Feel anxious.
Even though my remaining clutter makes me.
Feel anxious, I choose to accept who I am and how I feel.
I choose to accept who I am and how I feel.
Even though I don't feel very neutral about my remaining clutter.
Even though I don't feel very neutral about my remaining clutter.
Sometimes I feel ashamed.
Sometimes I feel ashamed.
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed.
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed.
And sometimes I'm not very accepting.
And sometimes I am not very accepting.
I accept that I'm on the path.
I accept that I am on the path.
And I'm doing it at my pace.
And I'm doing it at my pace.
Eyebrow. My clutter makes me anxious.
My clutter makes me anxious.
Side of the eye. I want to feel serenity.
I so want to feel serenity.
Under the eye. I can feel serenity because I know I'm on the path.
I can feel serenity because I know I'm on the path.
Under the nose. The truth is, there's a lot to do.
The truth is, there is a lot to do.
Chin. And that's okay.
And that's okay.
Collarbone. The truth is, there's a lot to do.
The truth is, there's a lot to do.
Under the arm. And I accept who I am and how I feel.
And I accept who I am and how I feel.
Top of that. And I appreciate feeling more neutral.
And I appreciate feeling more neutral.
Deep breath, everybody.
I appreciate feeling more neutral.
Wouldn't that be nice about all our challenges?
Yep. And if you're having. Yeah. If you're having problems with the sound breaking up, you may be on a slow connection or have other interference. And we're going to have a replay and there's a get audio video help little link down there. If you click on that, you can switch to compatibility mode, which uses a certain technology to be able to try to address that. But sometimes the replay will have the audio and yes, it can feel overwhelming. And that's where to the program clearing clutter from the inside out. Overwhelm is one of the key modules. Distraction. We're encouraging you to take a five minute action. Why? Because overwhelm is the reason for most people that they don't make any progress, that it keeps piling up. A five minute action where you tap on the overwhelm and then take the action. Even if the action is, I'm going to hold this in my hand and not do anything with it. I'm just going to feel and tap on what it is and put it right back on the pile. That may make no sense to someone who's trying to get it done. But from our expertise in this work, what we're saying is that the emotional changes that we're evoking through the tapping and engaging with the clutter are creating not just a clearing now, but new patterns of processing and energy inside of you that will allow you to be effective at keeping your space harmonious forever. It does take effort, but the overwhelm is what blocks and stops us. I love that there are so many questions. Thank you so much. And we're going to go on to the next.
I want to say one thing about that, Rick, because it was so important as a shift for me. So when you're encouraging them to feel inspired to do a five minute action, that changed so much for me, because I told you and I told you all on the original webinar, I felt the need to have a three day weekend or five days before I could do anything. Well, do you think I could ever do anything? Not if I needed five days. I don't have five days. So doing a five minute inspired action changed my life, changed my clutter, changed everything. Because then I could one shelf. I could do one shelf at a time. I could do one drawer at a time. I could do one tiny little space on my desk at a time. And it makes it manageable. Why do we get overwhelmed? Because it's not manageable. We can't see a way through to the end. Well, most of you on this program, you're not, as Helen wrote in, you're not going to fix it and finish it and clear it all up in 24 hours. That would be absurd. We wouldn't have a program if that's all we needed to do. We would never program. So remember, everybody, don't dismiss the value of that five minute inspired action. Really powerful.
Awesome. All right, so hold on a second. So I'll take this one. I am open to guidance on a good way to clean out the thousands of emails I have. There are a few things, contracts I need just with five minutes and see also sometimes guess what? There are things in our piles that are our problem. They're the things that once we start getting close to them and the layers of stuff are revealing the energy of them, we will stop. We just don't want to look at it. That's where you can try a five minute action in another place if that works. But you can't go back to the kitchen table. Guess what, you got something in there. Maybe one of your actions is to quickly go through and find the thing that bugs you the most. Or that's like, oh, God. Not that that would be a really important clue. That's why we do the emotional work.
And maybe clearing the space, getting the pile going down. Might be what's triggering you face. May be, oh, what have I done here?
All right, Carol, this is an interesting question. Books on art techniques are like candy for an aspiring artist like me. I'm hoping to have time to read them when I retire, but having collected them for more years than I have left, I am inundated with them and was only able to pick a few that I know I will never read. After skimming through them, I'm afraid of missing something, of not being the expert. I also suspect there's an element of avoiding doing the hard work of actually making art. Thank you, Linda. Carol, what would you be your approach with that kind of energy?
I'll tell you one thing. It's like the person who reads about aerobic exercise and has four books, five books, seven books, eight books about exercise and they've never gone out and taken a walk. So she's onto it, her theory. Linda, your theory is correct. I believe your theory is right, that you're avoiding the hard work, that the other thing is you're talking about basic fomo. What if I don't know enough? What if I don't catch it? What if there's a technique in One of these art books that I miss. FOMO is across the board in every profession. Right? So we have, you know, I've certainly trained psychotherapists and coaches who have gone back to school. How many times do you, how many pro. How many certificates do you need before you're done? Now, not done with learning, but you don't need seven formal certificates for coaching. So I would just do simple. If we could just do a quickie on FOMO tapping Rick. I think that would be fun. Fun and good. Even though when I Even though when I look at this pile, I feel on fear of miss. I feel my fear of missing out.
Even though when I look at this pile, I feel my fear of missing out.
And it's an old fear for me.
And it's a really old fear for me.
I accept it's where I am and how I feel.
I accept it's where I am and how I feel.
Even though my fear of missing out comes up with these books.
Even though my fear of missing out comes up with these books.
What if I miss something?
What if I miss something?
What if I don't know at all?
What if I don't know at all?
I accept who I am and how I feel.
I accept who I am and how I feel.
Eyebrow. That fear of missing out.
That fear of missing out side of the eye.
It's a very old feeling for me.
It's a very old feeling for me.
Under the eye, it makes me feel anxious.
It makes me feel anxious.
Under the nose, it makes me collect stuff I don't need.
It makes me collect stuff I don't need.
Chin. But what if I miss something?
But what if I miss something?
There's nothing to miss.
There's nothing to miss.
Under the arm. What if I miss the answer?
But what if I missed the answer?
The secret?
The secret or the key? The key.
I'm whole as I am right now.
I am whole as I am right now.
Deep breath. That's going to trigger a lot of you. I would re tap on that. I'm whole as I am right now. No, I'm not. I need the best dress, the best suit, the best shoes, the best sneakers, the best tennis racket, the best book, the best notebook, the best cd. You're whole as you are right now. That's really what we're talking about, is getting down to that. So we're not grasping and grabbing at stuff that's not fixing. It's not filling the hole anyway.
Exactly. And the practice of tuning into your clarity about, well, I appreciate that you went through and you got rid of the ones that you're clearly never going to look at. They're just not attractive to you. The other side of that is pick the five that really like, oh, God, these feel good when I hold them, when I touch them and put them in a sacred place. Do your tapping on your FOMO and then spend five minutes doing something artistic. Actually get into it. When I did my Netflix cue in stages, the first pass was that I don't think I ever want to look at these anymore. And that got rid of a lot. But then I chose something because I had more clarity. There was less noise. I chose something I wanted to watch, and I enjoyed that. And then the next time through, it was like, okay, let's just keep the things that are really a 7, 8, 9, or 10. I really wanted to do these at a 7, 8, 9, Or 10. And that got me down to less than one quarter the original size. So as a tip, did I tap during that? Yeah. And I felt like that pause that stuck. Like, do I? Don't I. That's the pregnant moment. That's the. Or the fertile moment where you get to treat your energy in a way that honors that. You want clarity more than you want quantity. You want things that engage you and draw you to them, where it feels abundant to have them, rather than, like, a weight of all of these books on me that I'm just never going to be. Never going to be able to be an artist.
Wonderful. I want to just respond to Sherry. Sherry, thank you so much. She says, I realize that my clutter and FOMO purchases buys are keeping me from feeling panicked, that I'm all alone now. Sorry for your loss. And yes, you are on it. FOMO purchase. You all are here because you're on our EFT tapping lists, which means you know how to feel. Do we love feeling everything we feel? Nope. Absolutely not. But you can handle it. Pain and all. Everybody. Sheri, you can feel it and not buy something else, Right? So it's just one great. We're so happy to have all of you here. It's really, really special. And these are the issues that keep us stuck. Everybody. This is what it is. These are our feelings. So wonderful. Glad to have you here.
Yeah. And someone mentioned that they find my colors clutter and distracting. And, you know, red's my color. I chose this shirt because it felt good to me. And the green of this room is the green of this room that I like. This is something where it reminds us that people are Going to have different reactions to the things that are right for you. Clutter isn't about what is going to be right for everyone. And I appreciate people speaking out, and I also appreciate that we get to have people in our lives that don't necessarily love the way that we walk in the world or decorate our house. You know, if it's not clutter to you, it's okay. And. Yeah. Okay. So the questions keep changing because people are upvoting. Thank you.
There are so many tapping scripts in the program. You've got transcripts for the first six hours, and then you've got tapping scripts by audio. So they are super helpful. I totally agree. And they're all involved in the program.
Yep.
That you already purchased. And we know you purchased it because you're here.
Right. Okay. So how do I deal if I feel I don't need the stuff anymore, but I find it useful and precious and I still want it. There's. There's money in it. At the same time, I feel guilty to think this way. Annette wrote, and Linda added the other issue for books and stuff that I paid good money for, and it's difficult to let it go. But I also do not want to go through the hassle of trying to sell through ebay or other outlets, since doing so consumes so much time and effort. Feels like a catch 22. Yeah, catch 22. Carol, do you want to help Linda and Annette and all of us with that one?
Well, I'll tell you, the abundance issue is hard for me. That's my thing with clothes more than books, is that if I spent X dollars on that suit or shirt or jacket, it can be out of style, like, embarrassing, like the big shoulder pads right from the 90s. And I still had trouble letting it go because I paid for it. So it feels like I'm wasting money. And I had to tap and then talk myself into it and say, but how's it doing in the closet? It hasn't been touched for years. So is that saving the money that I. In other words, it was a mental game and then an emotional release and clearing. And then it was like, it's not doing me any good, and maybe somebody needs it, and if not, they're gonna cut it up and make something out of it. But it's not doing me. The idea that it's doing me good because I bought it once. That's. That's lunacy, which we're all involved in our own little lunacy. So it's a scarcity issue around money again. And I think we could do that. Karate chop. Even though I'm afraid to give it up because I paid for it, Even.
Though I'm afraid to give it up because I paid for it, and I.
Go around in circles because I don't want to do the work to give.
It up, I go around in circles because I don't want to do the.
Work to give it up, I don't.
Want to do the work to give it up.
I don't want to sell it on ebay.
I don't want to sell it on ebay. That's too much work.
It's too much trouble.
It's too much trouble.
I accept that I've got myself in a bind.
I accept that I've got myself in a bind.
Even though I don't want to let it go because I paid for it.
Even though I don't want to let it go because I paid for it.
What if someone else would find it useful?
What if someone else would find it useful?
Eyebrow. I'm afraid to let it go and it's my scarcity issue.
I'm afraid to let it go and it's my scarcity issue.
Side of the eye. I paid for it.
I paid for it.
Under the eye. It's brand new.
It's brand new.
Under the nose. I can't let it go.
I can't let it go.
Shin. That's like throwing money away.
That's like throwing money away.
Collarbone. But keeping it in my closet is also like throwing money away.
But keeping it in my closet unused is also like throwing money away.
Under the arm. What if someone else could make use of it?
What if someone else could make use of it?
What if the space in my closet is even more valuable?
What if the space in my closet is even more valuable?
I love the space I'm making for myself.
I love the space I'm making for myself.
Deep breath. I'm telling you, I had to go around and around in circles on that one. But I paid for it. But it worked. I went around in circles. I did the tapping on every absurd. I mean, if you could have heard my absurd things I said back to myself. But it works. The tapping works on that.
And when I did work on one of I can't remember which program, I think it was either. You know, you touch on scarcity and generosity and gratitude consistently throughout all of your work. So let's look at that here. If you have these things that are worth something, you at one time had the resource to be able to get that. So being Grateful that you have, through your life, had the resource to be able to have these things and then tune into your own generosity. Like there is someone without that privilege. There is someone out there that really would use this pot or whatever it is that you would like to not be carrying with you and then find a direction for it. There are places all over the world where people who have less privilege than we do could make use to it. I'm not saying load up a truck, but start with one thing or three things, and then once you give them away, tap on the emotions that come up, especially the scarcity, and also allow yourself to feel the gratitude and generosity that you're part of an ecosystem which is shifting from hoarding to sharing. But I'll tell you, that not only changed what was in my house, but it also changed my own energy about community and everything else. There's a lot of benefit for that. And as Monica said, it's interesting how anxious I feel doing some of these tappings. Yeah, there's emotions in our stuff. This is deep work. Thank you for being here. I need to find that question to mark it as. There we go.
Great stuff. You all. That means you're doing your work. You're bringing up the tough. Bringing up the tough challenges that we all have.
Okay. Yeah. Okay. There's one. Mary writes, I feel guilty throwing away things that my mother saved for decades. Her wedding dress, pressed flowers from her wedding, gifts of handiwork to her from my grandmother. Volumes of photographs more than 100 years old. She died six years ago, Carol.
Well, guilt is a fabulous tapping target. We have a major guilt sequence and whole module. I think guilt and shame in the original program. So the guilt is, I've done something bad or I'm doing something bad. What are you doing? Your mother had a clutter program. Your mother had a clutter problem. So she held on to things for decades and decades. The wedding dress, I'm sure, is beautiful, but is it useful now? That material is probably too old for you, your children, your grandchildren, your nieces to wear. So what are you doing? It's the memory. It's the connection. It's the. Yes, but I'll lose. You're not gonna lose your mother. Your mother wasn't gonna lose her life if she let go the pressed flowers from her wedding. How? I'm telling you, pressed flowers from however many years ago, they're not. They don't look so good. Right. So we want to work on the guilt, which is I'm gonna do something bad or I'm Afraid I'm not a loyal daughter. Child. What if you're different? What if you took pictures of the beautiful one picture of the beautiful wedding dress and it was saved? That's a lot less space than the dress. What if. You know, whatever. Trust me. When my grandfather died, we found keys, generations of keys to cars, houses. Some of the houses were probably knocked out. We had the keys. I don't know whatever that was in my family. So let's do something on guilt. Because it's how the generational clutter keeps coming, how it keeps going to the next. You know, I have to make some decisions. My nieces don't care the way I did about stuff from other generations. So we'll try this, all right? Even though I feel guilt about letting go of their stuff, Even though I.
Feel guilt about letting go of their stuff.
And I feel the obligation to hold on.
And I feel the obligation to hold on.
This obligation is heavy and not very freeing for me.
This obligation is heavy and not very freeing for me.
Even though I feel guilty, maybe she'll be mad at me.
Even though I feel guilty, maybe she'll be mad at me.
I don't like this feeling of obligation.
I do not like this feeling of obligation.
And I don't think she wants me to feel limited.
And I don't think she wants me to feel so limited.
Eyebrow. But I really feel guilty But I.
Really feel guilty at even the thought.
Side of the eye. All these incredible memories.
All these incredible memories under the eye.
All these wonderful memories.
All these wonderful memories under the nose.
They're in my energy system.
They are so in my energy system.
Shin. I don't need the stuff.
I don't need all this stuff.
Collarbone. I don't like this burden and obligation.
I don't like this burden and obligation under the arm.
I feel quite sure she doesn't want me to feel obligated.
I feel quite sure she doesn't want me to feel obligated.
Top of that. What if I let go of just a little bit of it what if.
I let go of just a little.
Bit of it and dealt with my guilt?
And dealt with my guilt?
I haven't done anything wrong.
I have not done anything wrong.
Deep breath.
There can be yes buts there. Sometimes we have grandmothers and mothers that want us to hold on to things that that's part of what they were taught, is how you show honor and respect for your elders and your line and your lineage. If that is true for you, then it's not clutter. If it is not true for you, then every time you look at it, you'll feel that I want to. You know, the guilt, the feeling of obligation, those are perfect targets for building a sense of resiliency and clarity and confidence. And that eventually leads to feeling safe and secure. We're here.
Even though all these Karate chop. Even though all these topics make me feel scared.
Even though all these topics make me feel scared.
Unsafe and insecure.
Unsafe and insecure.
I choose to just accept where I am and how I feel, I choose.
To just accept where I am and how I feel.
Even though I'm not accustomed to accepting.
My emotions, Even though I'm not accustomed to accepting my emotions.
Especially ones that make me feel unsafe or insecure.
Especially ones that make me feel unsafe or insecure.
I accept who I am in this moment.
I accept who I am in this moment.
Eyebrow. A lot of these topics are scaring me.
A lot of these topics are scaring me.
Side of the eye. No wonder I have clutter.
No wonder I have clutter.
Under the eye. I'm afraid to address some of these topics.
I'm afraid to address some of these topics.
Under the nose. They feel a little scary to me.
They feel a little scary to me.
Chin. I'm afraid to address some of these challenges.
I'm afraid to address some of these challenges.
Collarbone. But I can handle my feelings.
But I can handle my feelings.
Under the arm. I can feel my lack of safety.
I can feel my lack of safety.
Top of the head. The truth is, I am safe.
The truth is I am safe.
And I can handle my feelings.
And I can handle my feelings.
Deep breath, everybody. It's a feeling. It's in your body. It's in your mind. Don't cut off from it. Even one that feels scary. Just own I'm scared. We've hit some pretty big topics for our first clutter call, everybody.
Yeah. And I wanted to reflect. Some people's energy levels are different. I spent time being chronically ill a couple of decades ago, and I know that when you're ill, your body wants to take care of itself. And that's priority one. So what's your approach here? Take it in five minute chunks. Feel for what you would like more of. Maybe it's spaciousness. Maybe it's just a little bit of clear, clear space, Clearness. A little bit less noise. And if you do that and you have five minutes, say, what would make me feel a little more spacious? It could be that you do two things in the pile and you take the pile and Put it on in another place. I know that a lot of people say, no, no, no. You have to work through. You're creating an emotion, an energy space. So give yourself that. If your intention is to feel a little less overwhelmed, like, I'll do that. I'll look around my room and say, well, I'm feeling a little distracted or overwhelmed. What could I do in five minutes? And you find is like, three things go into the trash can, and that goes back to the kitchen. And, you know, the snack mix goes where the snack mix needs to be rather than on the table. There's nothing wrong with it. On my desk, I sometimes eat it. But if it's. If I worry with distraction, if that's the clutter I've got right now, from a very practical standpoint, that can make a big difference in five minutes. And when we have limited energy, which is another way of saving limited time for all of us, there's never enough time to just get it all done perfectly. We're building a sustainable practice of feeling clear and spacious. Thank you so much for asking that question. All right. I believe that this one we need to address biggest issue. What if I need it someday? Mostly about collecting containers and boxes, any kind of decorative cardboard baskets. I do these because I like neat things, neat and organized, but there is excess. And I'm, quote, afraid I won't have the right size container box when I need one. I'm thinking of storing them all in one place and then be okay with it for a while. Then I can safely purge. Denise asked that Carol, what would you.
It's a version of fear of missing out. It's a fear of, darn it, I gave it up. And now I knew I would need it. And kind of panicky, as if that's an emergency that you don't have the right plastic container for something or a basket. You can go out and get one when you need it. But this idea of bags and bags and bags and plastic boxes and plastic containers and wicker baskets, you can fill an entire house with it. So remember, the thought is actually where the distortion is. Yes, I might need it one day. Yeah, you might one day, what, 15 years from now. So you're gonna take up that space. So it's this idea of also having to have the perfect thing. We've gone through that a little bit when someone, you know that. It's a little bit like the one with the art books, you know, I gotta know it all and have it all. So I think releasing that, I think just tapping on and then releasing. Yes. But I might need it one day. I think that's a great tackle issue.
Yeah. Do you want to lead us in? Just. We have a couple minutes left. And we'll do some quick tapping there and then we'll close up.
Karate chop. Even though I'm convinced I might need.
It one day Even though I'm convinced I might need it someday so I.
Don'T want to let it go.
So I refuse to let it go.
I accept who I am I accept who I am and how I feel.
And how I feel Even though I'm.
Convinced I might need it someday Even.
Though I'm convinced I might need it someday I can let go I can.
Let go Even if I'm afraid Even.
If I am afraid.
Eyebrow. I'm convinced I might need it.
I'm convinced I might need it.
Side of the eye. This is a scarcity issue again.
This is my scarcity issue again.
Under the eye. I'm convinced I might need it one day.
I'm convinced I might need it someday.
Under the nose. And that might be true.
And that might be true.
So what?
So what?
Collarbone. I might need it one day.
I might need it one day.
Under the arm. And that's okay.
And that's okay.
Top of that. Because I have everything I need right now.
Because I have everything I need right now.
Deep breath. I would keep tapping on that because the phrase is so engaging and really captivating. Keep tapping on it on that until it really feels more neutral. Like, yeah, I might. So what? I'm getting rid of the basket. So what? You know, it's like you can. You can accumulate a lot of stuff, a lot of stuff that way.
Sure. And, you know, again, the same approach. Pick things that are. That are five things that you could almost fit anything in, and then really look at the others and give them. We use numbers and tapping. A lot of times we haven't done a lot of that tuning in. But this is important for you. Like, how much do I resist giving this one away? And look for the disconnect. It really has no value to you. You don't even really particularly like its colors, and you're still holding onto it. Pick something like that where there's the conflict. I refuse to give this away. I refuse to get rid of this. I refuse to recycle this. I refuse. Why am I refusing? And I accept my feeling about it. And I'm shifting it right now. Quick tapping like that can get you to a place where your energy is moving. And again, don't look at. We recommend not looking at it like a whole big overwhelming task. Pick the things that give you joy and then do some tapping on the things that really, really, really. This is the excess. Oh, this is definitely the excess. Not as a whole, but the one thing, the two things, the three things. So thank you all for being here. What an amazing group. We have so many people from around the world are joining us in this endeavor. We have 28 more questions to answer. But one of the things that if you look at these questions that people are asking, they fall into the category. I have an emotional energy around my stuff. Now that you have a question, if your question didn't get answered, you have a question, write that down, put it in front of you, and then as you go through the program, hear for how we're already addressing that emotion and take that five minute action. Anything else you want to add to that, Carol? Right now.
Five minute action changed my life. Five minute action changed my life. And we're okay as we are. We accept yourself, what you feel. It's this resistance against the feeling that makes you collect books, paper, clothing. It's a resistance against what you feel. Maybe you feel less than, maybe you feel inadequate. That's your tapping target. But you don't need 20 baskets or 50 bags or whatever.
Yeah. Thank you all so much. Our next call was in the email today. Put that on your calendar. You're already will be registered for that. And we'll see you next time. And let's keep tapping and clearing. Happy New Year.
Yes. Happy New Year, everyone. Thank you, Rick.
Just give me a second.
