This is a YouTube video titled "The Lights In The Bedroom Are Still Not Fixed... Its So Stressful!" created in June 2017. It features a conversation between Rick Wilkes and Kathy from Thriving Now, discussing the emotional stress caused by unresolved small issues, specifically a broken light in the bedroom. They explore the psychological impact of such stressors and guide viewers through a tapping exercise to help release emotional tension and find alternative solutions.
The lights in the bedroom still aren't fixed after a year of politely asking for it. And I don't know what to do.
That would be really stressful.
It is. And that's what someone wrote into us. And we invite your questions. And I'm Rick from Thriving now, and this is Kathy from Thriving Now. And if you're stuck trying to get something done and it's not happening, we have some ideas about how you can get your energy moving.
Yeah. If you have a small stressor that's continually there and you haven't gotten it changed, often, that means we're stuck in our primitive brain. We're in a place where either it triggers us and reminds us of a childhood thing, or it's bringing up some other things. So we feel powerless. And as children, we often only had one way to get solutions. Our parents. We had to convince mom or dad or whatever. Our caregiver was to give us money so we can go with the kids or get the ice cream cone or whatever. So we were kind of trained that there's a single conduit for solutions.
Right.
And our primitive brain goes, oh, my God, this one person isn't doing like, can you help me change the light bulb, please?
Sure, I'll get to it.
Yeah. And a year later, you're starting to feel very powerless and stress, those little stresses that add up. And every time you see that light bulb, you're like, I am powerless in this world and this person doesn't love me or whatever.
Yeah. I asked them to do it, and I'm not going to take it back. And again, one of the things about the type of emotional work that we do is there are certain signals. And like Kathy said, the primitive brain tends to narrow us down. So we're, you know, just trying to.
See, especially when it's reactive, when it's not. When it's. When it's relaxed, then it feels safe, then it allows other things.
But, like, I could recommend that you find something that you want that you'd like to get rid of and put a Craigslist ad out there, say, hey, you can have this in return for fixing the lights. That's an idea that if you're in primitive brain and you're resentful and frustrated that a particular person hasn't taken care of it, that idea would never come.
To you, or your friend has a ladder or maybe you can actually change it. And like, I know I tend to get humans, we tend to get in patterns where, like, oh, that's their job. And this is my job versus okay, this is bothering me. I want to take responsibility and get it fixed.
So would you lead us in some tapping to just kind of free up the energy? And tapping is a way of stimulating the body while we're focusing on a feeling, a situation that we are having a stressor and. And we literally have stress relief in our fingertips by touching the body. Usually we've been trying to think our way through it, and there's no connection to the body. There's intuition and guidance and creativity that comes from below the neck too. Who the funk? So tapping is a way to get that energy moving and have access to it.
Yeah. So take a nice, slow, deep breath. Feel your feet on the floor. Wiggle your toes. Feel your butt in the seat. You are actually supported by the universe. You don't have to worry about gravity. Gravity's got it. So karate chop. Even though I've asked and asked.
Oh, boy. Even though I've asked and asked, these.
Lights are still not changed.
These lights are still not changed.
And I really want a solution.
And I really need a solution.
Even though I've been looking for one person to change these lights Even though.
I've been looking to one person to.
Change these lights, and after a year, I'm pretty sure they're not coming through.
And after a year.
I invite my primitive brain to relax.
I invite my primitive brain to relax.
I'm actually safe.
I'm actually safe.
It's just a few light bulbs that are out.
It's just a few light bulbs that are out.
No tigers are about to eat me.
No, no tigers are about to eat me.
Top of the head. I can find other solutions.
I can find other solutions.
Eyebrow. I don't want to.
I don't want to.
Side of the eye. I asked politely.
I asked politely.
Under the eye. It's their job.
It's their job.
Under the nose. But they're not doing it.
But they're not doing it.
Shannon. I'm the one who's stressed, and I'm.
The one who's stressed every single day about this collarbone.
What if I could find other solutions?
Hmm. What if I could find other solutions?
Under the arm. What if I could take care of myself?
What if I could take care of myself?
Top of that. I am disappointed that they weren't there for me.
I am really disappointed that they were not there for me.
Eyebrow. And I want to take care of myself.
And I want to take care of myself.
Side of the eye. I choose to tap on this Anger.
I choose to tap on this anger.
Under the eye, this frustration, this frustration under the nose. And I want to take care of myself.
And I'm going to take care of myself, Jin.
So I'm gonna find other solutions.
I am going to find some other solutions.
Collarbone. I'm gonna find ways to get these lights changed.
I'm going to find ways to get these lights fixed under the arm.
Because I don't deserve to have this stress in my life.
I don't deserve to have this stress in my life.
Top of the head. And I'm really glad I can find other ways to do it.
And I'm really glad that I'm open to finding other ways to do it.
Take a nice, deep breath. If you find yourself feeling very insistent that that person must do it, realize there's probably a message behind it that they love you if they do it, or they don't love you if they don't, or they owe you or whatever it is. And those are great things to tap on, because staying stuck a year of, like, little stresses like that, like, we're looking at 1, 2, 5 pound stresses, like, okay, yeah, we can blow them off, but over a year, that's a lot of weightlifting. And there's plenty of things you could use your energy for more productively.
Absolutely. So what stresses you out? What are the things that come up for you? Please leave them in the comments. We use your input to guide our work, and we have some resources available to you, too, and you'll see those there as well. Thank you. So tapping is a way to get that energy moving and have access to it.
Yeah. So take a nice, slow, deep breath and feel your feet on the floor.
