How To Cold Approach Any Woman in 2025 (Infield Example)

Excuse me, the way you're eating that, it's just like, like the most delicious hot dog ever.

Thank you.

So this is a very spontaneous approach I did. I see this girl right next to an outdoor exhibition and she's eating a hot dog, and just the way she's eating that, she's eating it, she's really enjoying it. So literally that's what I open with. I tell her, hey, the way you're eating that hot dog, you know Just like, you're making it really delicious. And she's like, she smiles at me and she's like, yeah, it's okay. You know? So super situational. I'm very much in the moment. I'm not trying to come up with anything else. You know, like I didn't even see her face really. I just saw her the way she was eating her hot dog and that's it. And that's what I opened with. The most powerful openers, the ones where you literally come up with on the spot, just based on what you've actually observed about her about the situation, and then you just bring that energy, and that's what's happening. True? It's not true? It's okay. Which one? Oh, okay, okay, okay. So you got it, but then you're not impressed.

It's okay.

Again, instead of asking her, okay, so, um, hey, I just saw you, you look really beautiful, whatever, I'm just staying present. She's telling me about the hot dog. All right, we talk about that. Okay, so it's good, it's not good? And she's like, okay. And I was like, okay, well, okay doesn't sound that Good. You know, I'm again staying present in the conversation. This is one of the most powerful things. Instead of having some type of agenda and already deciding that, hey, I like her, I need to get her number, I need to get something out of her, I'm just staying present in the conversation. I'm just playing with it because I don't know where it's going. I'm just here to play. It's just good.

I love that.

Also, you have like really artistically curly hair.

It's very weird.

Where'd you Where'd you get that? Are you like Moroccan? I got that right away. Right. So now after the hot dog thread is pretty much at a standstill, is coming to an end, I've just noticed something about her, right? The hot dog, number one. Number two, well, she's got this super artistically curly hair and I'm really, really just present to that. And I just communicate that, hey, this is what I've noticed about you. It's not just curly, it's artistically curly., right? It makes it more spicy, it makes it more fun. And again, I make the whole vibe about her. Now I want to get to know her. So instead of asking her a question, "Hey, this is what I've noticed about you. Hmm, let me guess, are you Moroccan?" And funny enough, it just so happens that I'm right. She's like, "Yeah," right? And you can see that she's hooked and she's immediately asking me, "Okay, where are you from?" Right? And that's when you know they're actually interested. Now they're investing. Now she's investing in the conversation. As well. What do you think? What do you think? Where do you think I'm from?

Japan.

Japan? Yeah. Very close, very close.

China.

Very close. I think you only have like one country left at this point.

No? America.

So when a girl asks you, let's say, let's say in this type of context where you just approach someone, they're showing their interest in you. It's really easy to think that, you know, the moment they show their interest, like you're like, okay, I'm an open book. "Let me just tell you everything about myself." What you wanna do is you want to actually kind of let them, you wanna make it easy and fun for them to invest in you. In this case, if I had just said, "Okay, yeah, I'm from this place, right? I'm from the US, I'm from Korea." She'd be like, "Okay, cool." I mean, that would've been fine as well, but everything is a micro calibration here, fine tuning and tweaking the tiniest details of the energetics and vibe, obviously. And instead of answering the question directly, I'm like, "Okay, what do you think? Tell me." I guessed your nationality right, it's your turn now, right? So it's about that. Now, important thing to note here is it's not about getting it right. It just so happened that I got her nationality right, but oftentimes, like, if I'm in a playful mood, I'd be like, okay, she looks Moroccan, but I'd be like, hmm, you're obviously Korean. Like, you know, you can just play with that. Like, having that playful energy, self-amusement is the most important thing. Very bad. Your Asian geography, okay, so it's kind of like 5 out of 10. There's only one Loan left in that region, you know. So here I'm making the whole interaction fun. I'm making her guess where I'm from and she's giving me a couple of guesses. I'm like, no, no, no, no, right? And at a certain point I'm like, man, you're really bad at this, you know, right? It's like the number one mistake. Just because a girl is cute, pretty, whatever, doesn't mean that you have to have this simpy energy. It's like, oh wow, okay, no, oh, I'll give you one more guess. Okay, guess, whatever, right? It's like, okay, well, I can give you one more guess, but you better get it right, you know? And it's like, okay, if you're bad, I'm gonna call it out, right? I'm always expressing my truth, right? Again, I'm having fun with it. I'm not being a dick about it, right? I'm just having fun with it. I have this playful energy. I've always got this smile on my face, right? And that's what makes a difference.

I think I got it.

Yes, amazing. So you traveled all the way from Morocco just to see me? See this? Okay, but you can't get enough.

Yeah.

What's your, what's your favorite, uh, installation or art here? Because they display a lot of stuff, right? What's your favorite thing you've seen? You're not present. See, this is one of the easiest things when you're next to a situation where there's some stuff happening, you can actually comment on that. It just so happens that we're next to an outdoor exhibition and we're just kind of talking about that, right? So, "Minded, you're always like going in and out." Yeah, again, and she's like, "Yeah, like I don't know much, whatever." And I was like, "Yeah, you're not present-minded, you're just kind of like going in and out, you're just like doing your own thing," right? Again, playfully teasing her, right? Instead of just being like, "Okay, okay, okay, that's cool, that's cool, that's cool." Like the vast majority of the time, that's a lot of the guys' energy, just like, okay, wow, everything's cool, amazing. The thing is, if you genuinely have that mindset, it's great. But in reality, it's not. You can be a little bit critical. You're there to evaluate the energetics of everything. So, I'm here to kind of call her out. It's like, wow, I mean, you see this a lot? You don't even know what you're seeing, right? It's like, you're not present-minded, right? Just being playful again. But today, what's the best thing you've seen? It can't be this one. It can't be this one.

This—

but this is pretty bad. This is like the worst, right? All the emojis. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Wait, no, but there's different nature though. Which one are you talking about? Right, just talking about the fact that you know, what we're seeing. There's just like a bunch of emojis, just not, not that impressive. So really speaking my truth here. Um, Jewish, right? And like, we were trying to go to a Shabbat dinner here in West Hampstead. There's, there's a lot of Jewish people there. Yeah. And then basically like the organizer of Shabbat, she basically said like, okay, she was being hectic, so we did— we ended up not going. Yeah, it's a shame. Are you, are you like a Do you do a lot of Jewish stuff? So there's a part of the recording that didn't really get captured. So somewhere along the way, she told me that she's Moroccan, but actually she's Jewish. She's Jewish Moroccan. And I was like, oh, okay. One of my really good friends is Jewish, and we were trying to go to this Shabbat dinner, and it just didn't happen because the organizer of the dinner was being hectic and everything. I'm here to really tell my story about my world. I'm here to tell her that, okay, You are Jewish. And it just so happens that a close friend of mine is Jewish as well. And we just had this pretty interesting experience where I wanted to experience this Shabbat dinner. It's like a traditional Jewish dinner for the first time. And for whatever reason, because the organizer was being really hectic, we just couldn't make it happen. Right. Instead of just talking about, like, instead of just learning that she is Jewish and just being like, you know, like the vast majority of the time, that's what guys do. I'm like, okay, let me tell her, let me express my experience, my world to her so that number one, she knows what the vibe is like. And also she can understand that, okay, I'm pretty worldly, I have different friends, I'm very cultured. So by this point, I correctly guessed that she's Moroccan, which in and of itself is pretty insane, right? And I'm telling her about her world, which is Jewish and all that stuff, right? Yeah, I see, I see. Yeah, the more I hear, huh? Am I Christian? Now she's asking me if I'm Christian. She's ECing me, right? EC means emotional connection, right? Usually it's a pretty deep question, right? But we're kind of like connecting on that level. Like literally 2, 3 minutes into it, we're kind of talking about our beliefs and everything and our world. And this is what happens when you know how to really stay present in the moment and just like let the vibe guide you. Now, when I was a kid, I was like— I want this question.

What is your religion?

I don't have much of a religion. I believe that there is a higher power. I thought that when she was asking me, hey, what is your religion? I was like, hmm, is she looking for a husband too? Like maybe she's looking for like, maybe like, yeah, she likes my vibe, obviously. And she's like, hmm, if he's Christian, it's probably a no-go, right? So let me see. I kind of felt like she's trying to qualify for Magic, you know? I always talk about you gotta qualify women. I felt that she was doing that for me, right? So that was an interesting vibe. In this world, you know, but I don't, I personally don't believe that it has to go by one specific type of religion, you know? It's like, you know, you can, there's many truths, you know? And all the religions religions are talking about essentially like very— Yeah, here it's also powerful. I could have just said, no, I'm not Christian, you know, I'm an atheist or whatever. I'm going one step further right now. I tell her that, yeah, I don't have much of a religion. I believe that there's a higher power and I believe that ultimately speaking, all the religions are talking about essentially the same thing. And yeah, I could have gone deeper, but essentially I'm not shying away from I'm speaking my truth. And that's what makes the vibe attractive, right? And she knows that, yeah, like I'm here to speak my truth. I'm here to speak my authenticity. And yeah, it doesn't matter if we have the same religion or not. Like I'm just here to vibe, you know, I'm just here to connect, right? And see where the vibe flows. I'm here to qualify for Magic. Sounds like she's doing the same thing too. So let's see where this all flows. You work here? Well, what do you do for work?

I'm a facial therapist.

Huh? Skin.

Like a facial therapist.

Ah, okay. So you can sort out my face?

Huh?

Yeah, I'm just asking her, okay, you can sort out my face because she does skincare, right? So just making it a little bit more playful here. And again, you can kind of see that she's like really hooked because usually they kind of talk about themselves, but she asks me, directly after talking about what she does. What are you doing here? You know, what do you do? What do you think? What do you think I do? Take a guess. Something computer?

Yeah.

Nah, I mean, these days everyone does. Yeah, everyone does. That's like saying, yeah, like you speak, you know? I do a little bit of that. I do a little bit of that. Um, I mostly do, um, like I coach people, my confidence, communication. I also build a project where I bring nomadic people together in a house. Like we live together for 2 weeks to 2 months at a time in tropical location. Again, I'm speaking my authenticity here, and rather than just telling her, okay, this is This is what I do, XYZ. I'm telling her a story, right? Okay, this is what I do. I coach people, communication, confidence. At the same time, I do this thing where I bring people together, right? And there's like a bit of a hook. Instead of just completely opening my book and be like, okay, here it is. Well, that's boring. Making it a little bit more playful. Hey, like, let me show you one chapter, a part of chapter 1, for example. And I'm giving you an opportunity to take a cheeky glimpse into it, right? Do you live around here?

No, I'm actually— I'm living in Waldorf Green, which is next to my company. And I'm moving out also.

Wait, what'd you say?

You live— you know where Waldorf Green is?

Waldorf Green, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know where that is. Yeah, I actually visited an apartment there, and then that was the first time I saw like a lot of Jewish people with the hats and everything. I was like, this reminds me of New York, you know, like Brooklyn. Crazy.

Like, you went New York time ago?

I moved here in 2017. And then again, here's, uh, I'm telling her a story. She tells me she's from this part of London, or she lives in this part of London. I was like, okay, it just so happens that it's kind of a coincidence that I actually visited this place just a couple of weeks ago, and, you know, I saw a lot of Jewish people. With these hats. And I was like, hmm, kind of reminded me of New York, right? Kind of like telling her the story again, like vivid storytelling, super important. And then again, kind of she asked me a question back, and then we keep on going. I moved here in 2017, and then I was staying here for like 2 and a half years. And then now I split my time. I spent my summers here, and then the rest of the time I'm in like Bali, Thailand, Portugal. The kind of question she asks me as well kind of feels that she's interested because she's like, okay, you've been here, have you been here for a long time? Again, pay attention to the setting. We're next to this outdoor exhibition. You can hear the music is playing pretty loud. And then she is essentially creating this emotional connection with me, right? She's going one level deeper instead of saying like, okay, okay, very, very much of a surface level vibe. It's like, okay, where are you from? What do you do? Right? She's done all that, right? She was curious about me. She was curious about me. So she asked me all these questions. And then she's like, okay, so how long have you been here? Right? And kind of like getting to like, wanted to get to know me more. And then I could have just said, okay, 3 years, 5 years, whatever. But then again, I'm here to expand on that story, right? Okay. Yeah, I've been here in and out over the past few years. At the same time, you know, I spent my time between here. I usually spend my summers in London and the rest of the— and the rest— and then the rest of the time elsewhere. Right? Again, vivid storytelling, making it engaging, fun. And well, it just so happens that that's literally the way I live, right? Yeah, yeah.

I actually have to go to meet up with Andrew. Do you have Instagram so I can give you my photo?

Yes, yeah. You're cheekily— Right, so it's funny because she's literally doing what I teach guys to do. It's like, okay, I've actually got to go, but are you on Instagram? Let me give you a follow, right? So she's literally number closing me, or Instagram closing me in this case. And she's like, yeah, like, you know, we can do something next time, like I'll give you a follow, right? So she's doing that right now. And then at the end, you didn't hear the full sentence, but I tell you, I tell her, yeah, so you're cheekily trying to invite me out on a date, right? And she's like, yeah, you know, why not? I'm like, cheekily, like looking at your history. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Again, she's like qualifying again, saying that, okay, I just have to go meet up with my friend, but like next time we can like, you know, message and like meet after. That's what she's saying. Maybe you can invite me to some Shabbat dinner because I really like to experience that.

Good morning. Good morning.

Okay, see you, Lia. Good to meet you. Bye. Okay, so that was a pretty fun and deep approach and very, very— it showcases how powerful the vibe can be. Even though we only chatted for, let's say, what, 5 to 6 minutes tops. As long as I can be really, really present in the situation and instead of having this agenda of like what to say, whatever, I stay present in the moment, the conversation can be very, very smooth, playful, and deep at the same time. And that's what you've witnessed here. And yeah, that's the vibe. If you watch this till the end, you're probably thinking, damn, this is so difficult. Like, how do I even know what to say? And what if I get rejected? How do I recover and then, you know, bring the same level of enthusiasm to the next one and really manage my mental state and like know what to say, how to say the right things and all that stuff. And you know, even after the first thing, how do I say like the next thing, next thing, next thing? Well, the most difficult thing is to just get started, just to get in the game. So feel free to watch like my other infield breakdown videos to really dial in the vibe. And if you really, really want to take this seriously and get to the next level of your journey and unlock not only your social freedom, but also create your dream relationship, hit me up. Let's have a quick chat and let's see if you'd be a good fit for my coaching program. The most important takeaway from this video is to spread the vibe and spread your love, as always. So keep spreading your vibes, keep spreading your love, and keep calm and vibe on.