I Taught a Virgin Entrepreneur to Approach 400 Women in 3 Weeks
The video is a candid interview between coach Steven (the founder of Soul Game/Papa Club) and his client Brendon, who recounts his rapid transformation from a self‑described virgin and socially anxious man to a confident cold‑approacher who secured multiple instant dates, a marriage proposal, and a new mindset within a three‑week residential in Bangkok (following earlier residencies in London and Seoul). Brendon describes how the program’s core principles—immersive cold‑approach practice, the "instant date" technique, embracing unpredictability, and deep community support—shifted his internal narrative from outcome‑focused dating to becoming a man worthy of a relationship. He highlights three takeaways: (1) success isn’t about chasing a dream relationship but about personal worth, (2) the importance of staying open to unknown outcomes, and (3) the power of doing the work together within the Papa Club brotherhood. Throughout, Brendon praises Steven’s high‑touch coaching style, live‑in mentorship, and unwavering commitment, noting specific metrics (100‑400+ approaches, multiple high‑quality dates) and emotional breakthroughs (overcoming self‑doubt, reducing judgment, expanding his "vibe vortex"). The conversation also references other participants (Kati, Peng, Siggy, Charles) and illustrates how community proximity amplifies results.
Chapters
I don't think you're gonna work with somebody like me again in the context of this.
You never know, bud.
Man, I can never explain that feeling of going up to a girl after being rejected so many times, going up to a girl that you think you have no chance with, and you spent 4 hours with her on a date and she's absolutely hooked into you.
All right, final day of our residential here in Bangkok. We've been on a pretty crazy transformative journey.
Hell yeah.
I'm Steven. Papa Choi, Papa Choi.
When the student is ready, the teacher appears, right? I just never realized that teacher was going to be you, actually.
Yeah.
So you asked me to come out to London, right? The first residential that Steven did with somebody on a grander level, like on a crazy level. It was traumatizing and life-changing. But that's really what Soul Game is all about. It's all about putting yourself in uncomfortable situations so that you create more, uh, more abundance in your life, really. Even if I was really exhausted, I left a completely different person, actually. My confidence level shot up. I started cold calling a lot more businesses. I started being more confident with women, where I said to you, hey, whenever you do this again, I don't care where or what or how, I like— I want to be a part of it. I think what's been unique about working with you is your level of commitment for clients is really top Pre-London, I'm still a virgin, though I had a couple of opportunities not to be one, but I just chose not to, especially on the last day. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
He got a marriage proposal.
Yeah, I got a marriage proposal. The first thing, and that's what Soul Game is really good if you stick with it, is unlocks new realms of possibility in your life that 99.9% of guys will never experience in their lifetime. Now London, really what you pushed is this concept that I'd never heard of before called the instant date. Not, not only did I get an instant date, which is already crazy, I got an instant date with a woman that I was so attracted to, like 10 out of 10. She's still like one of the most beautiful women I've ever went on a date with. And the fact that I did that 3 days in is insane to me. And then that happened a second time with another very beautiful Chinese girl. So the first thing that happened is that it unlocked the realm of possibility.— where it even for the most— I'm probably one of the most logical people Simo will work with. Very logical-minded, very process-oriented, very structured. But even I could come to the conclusion that, okay, if I do 100 approaches and these 2 things happen, well, my skill set is really bad in London. So it's like, assuming I just keep getting better, this should be happening more and more. And boy, did it happen a lot. But I can go on more dates and wow, I can be with somebody like this. The results and my trust in you both made me say, Okay, whatever he has planned for me is probably the right direction. I started doing the apps. I would see all these beautiful women on these apps and I'd be like, Steve, why are we cold approaching? But none of them would match with me. And then when they did, and it happened 2, 3 times, they were either not the vibe, which shocked me. I was like, beautiful girl, she's cute, not excited about this girl. And then the 2, 3 other times this happened was hot girls. One or two texts, unmatched. Part of why I came back to Seoul Game very aggressively, I would say, is a recognition and an acknowledgement, which most guys never get to because we all lie to ourselves. It's a recognition and acknowledgement to say that Steven's method is difficult. Steven's method is hard, but that's why Steven's method works. Before the residential, I felt really hopeless like a lot of guys did. I just— it was just a lot more internal hopelessness. Where it's like, in business, I can control everything. Where it's like, okay, get the leads, boom, dial the numbers, you can close the deals and get that done, right? Whereas in dating, I just felt stuck. Apps, oh, my college days are over, so I can't really meet girls from college anymore. Should I spend $100K on an MBA to maybe meet someone? Oh, that sounds a little expensive. Maybe arrange— So I didn't. I don't really have any friends who are introducing me to girls right now that I'm really into. I don't really, I just kind of felt stuck. So when you created this experience, the day game, you introduced me to this kind of way of thinking, this way of being, But what happened was I walked out of the experience with a new set of frame, a new frame essentially. I just said, "Oh, this is possible." It's just my frame has shifted a lot since then, but that possibility has been up. Where I went from like, "Yeah, this is not gonna happen for me." I even told, I remember distinctly telling you on the last day of lunch, "Yeah, before this I just didn't think I could ever find the love of my life." But then after I spent time with you and Kati, I was like, "Wow, Steve actually just created this out of thin air." like, I can do this too. Bangkok was very different, right? I know how to do this. And by know, I don't mean like I'm closing every girl. I don't mean like I'm Steve Vrounge. I mean like, if Steven tells me to approach a girl, I can do it. I can do it. It's like I always told myself, it's not about the approach. If I do this, when I come here, I'll be an absolute monster. Yeah, gentle monster.
Gentle monster. This guy, he went out in the in like the depths of winter in Montreal, Canada, right? And then January, I hop on a call with them. I'm like, bro, if you want to make it to Bangkok, right, if you want to do another residential with me, I need you to approach 100 women by the time you come, and I need you to do this alone.
It's like there's a lot of voices in your head that tell you can't do it, that you're not attractive, that women don't like you. Top 3 takeaways from Bangkok: Number 1, it's not about finding your dream relationship. We didn't talk about this. There's like 2 to 3 girls right now because of all this guy's coaching that are head over heels in love with me. But what's the problem? The problem is, is not that they don't want to date me. The problem is I don't want to date them. The takeaway is Steven is not teaching you how to get your dream relationship. That's just a byproduct of everything that we're doing. What he teaches you to do is how to be How do you become a man worth being in a relationship with?
For as long as you actually believe that your main goal here is to create your dream relationship as soon as possible, then you're gonna be very results-oriented. You're gonna be attached to your outcome, right? Like, it's just inevitable.
You're just gonna be like, "Oh, okay, I need to like, you know, go on an instant date." Just whatever it takes, you know?
A numbers game. I just need to approach like a lot of girls, right? Hey, better to take action than nothing, but still, what's unlocked inside of you is this notion that, hey, I'm here to become the best version of myself, really. And through the practice of Soul Game, you know, I learned how to really create this deep emotional connection with the soul in front of me.
And in the process, I, I actually discovered the different layers of like, who do I want to vibe It's about being the man that your dream partner wants to be with, or really that anyone wants to be with, or anyone wants to be around. And that was really apparent in this residential for me, where my lens just completely changed from like, "Oh my God, I need a girlfriend, I need a girlfriend, I need this," as if she's some prize to be won, right?
As if it's like a competition.
Yeah. Versus just going like, "I actually don't know who I want to be with." and that's okay. And I have a lot of things to learn.
Yeah.
And that's also okay. That's also okay, right?
It's a very important point, bro. Please, because you've taken so much action in this, because you are committed to this, you've invariably created this abundance mindset, to be honest. And that's why you can— you're— this shift in perspective actually occurred. Yes.
We see you kind of like doing approaches and killing it, but you're a great example of someone who doesn't take shortcuts life. It's like 17 years. It's like after I started seeing the results— obviously it helps that I know you and I already trust you and I've seen your results— I just applied that same mindset to the best that I can, right? In this car, I know it's not my strongest area of life, but I don't want to judge myself either. Like, try my best to push myself. So that's takeaway 1. Takeaway number 2: we actually don't know. I would always give you hypothetical situations because I do that all the time in business. Okay, if this happens, if Y happens, then we have to plan this. But in dating, that just doesn't apply, right? And especially in dating where it's like the frame is unpredictability. You don't know when or how or where or in what way you're going to meet your significant other. You don't know which girls are warm to you. You don't know which girls are going to be dicks to you. You don't have nothing, bro. You actually don't know. You have to keep approaching. And you would say that and then I wouldn't get it. I'd be like, yeah, I know, dude, like, what are you talking about? But I actually don't. I'd approach like 20 girls that day. I was super tired. I was like, my back— we didn't talk about that— my back was completely shot. And then I see this woman walking and I don't see her face. And I run up to her and I stop her and I go like, oh, whoa. And then I do my kind of script and then my approach, and then she just falls right into me and into my frame like a this puzzle, and I'm like, man, this is it. And I get really focused, and you see that in the clips, right? My, my body language. Yeah, like Steven even looked at me, he was like, bro, I'm not this kind of fight. I didn't know he could stand up like that.
Actually, literally, I actually did not know he could stand up like that. And you really downloaded everything that we've been telling you, and then you integrated in that specific moment, right?
Everything, everything. So why is my takeaway number 2, you actually don't know? Because the best woman I met in this entire residential, and it's not even close actually, right? It's not even close. I just don't like to remind myself of it. Is a woman who didn't speak English. What the frick is going on? It's like literally on my whole criteria, the first one is speak English, right? It's like, it's like it couldn't be any clearer. Like, yeah, of course you need to speak English. And then in that moment, my logical brain and my heart kept like fighting. My heart was going like, dude, dude, make something out of this. What are you doing? And my logical was like, just move on to the next one, man. Life is a numbers game. Just keep approaching. Right? And then after I kind of let her go and I made a lot of mistakes that we won't cover right now, and I sat down with myself a few days later, I realized I was like, you know what? I have to really stop lying to myself. I actually don't know what I want in a relationship. And Peng taught me, hey, the next time, Brendan, that you meet someone who doesn't speak English that well, that you vibe with, please don't judge them. Lesson is not that I should be with Pang. The lesson is that because of my failure to actually embrace unpredictability to the fullest and just be open to the process more, I could have— I would have done way better. In the context of dating, like, because we don't actually know, you have to stay open.
Yeah, it's a painful story. But at the same time, it's like one of the most beautiful stories.
Stay open, right?
Trust your intuition.
But now that judgment has gone down drastically. Now my goal would be to bring it down to zero, right?
You can actually talk yourself out of actually judging them.
Yeah.
It's like, oh, okay, here's what I'm noticing about them. I'm judging them. Okay, let's kind of like put this aside for a second.
Yeah.
Yeah, let's actually really be present. Yeah.
Yeah, supermodel. Girl, like, bim, English not good at all, like super bad. But because I met Pang once again, so I was asking her questions about her tattoo, right? And then she was like, I was asking like, oh, what's the meaning again? But her English is not good. It's not because she doesn't want— she's there, she's hooked, she's— it's not because she's not interested or she doesn't want to talk. She's having trouble, right? So the old Brendon should have been like, okay, let me try another question. Okay, why is this question working? Like, why is it I would get really irritated, right? Whereas after I met Peng, it's always a reminder. It's like, hey bro, don't judge. But it really all comes back to Peng. Imagine how many other IDs I would have absolutely screwed up. Like, blessing. Like, that one's a blessing in my life. Thank God for her. So all the other women don't have to suffer the same fate, you know? Blessing.
All right, takeaway number 3, let's go.
Takeaway number 3: if you're gonna do something right, do it together. Got some instant dates, starting to really flow. I can solo game on my own pretty decently, right? The first 100 approaches, it's really about getting over the fear. It was around 150 to kind of get over the majority of my fear, and around 300 for me to get like comfortable. From 100 to 1,000, it's about using the brotherhood, the other Papas to remind yourself that it is about the skill set, not the result. The pain I've experienced going from 100 to 400 is the same level of pain that I've experienced from 0 to 100, but it feels different. Oh, I don't want to approach this girl. Oh, my liver hurts. Oh, my kidney hurts. Oh, I press— hi, why? Like, that's where the fear comes in. Whereas from 100, I would say you're close But not close enough.
You've almost gotten there, right?
You're just right there, right there, right there. So if it wasn't for like my papas, the other people in the group, Siggy, you, Charles, the other people in Papa Club, man, going through this pain on my own would really suck. But there are some girls, like not once or twice, like 10 times where there was a real possibility.
Yeah.
And I'll catch the ball and then I drop it, catch the ball., and I would drop it for completely different reasons, and it was painful. So the— and I'll continue to— so the third takeaway is like, if you're gonna do play this game, you want to do it together. I started meeting other Papas, man, I realized how important— it's way more fun— community was.
Yeah, man, I have— I personally experienced these moments too many times, and like, thank God I had some others around me.
Anyways, bottom line, yeah, if you actually want to take this game seriously, I don't— I personally don't see how you can do this alone. I don't think it's possible, actually, and do this at a high level. Yeah, I love that. You've been through a hell of a journey.
I mean, obviously, you know, I'm like, I'm there with you, like, we live together, so like, I see your progression, but man, like, it's been crazy.
My past self never would have believed that I would not go on— forget one, multiple dates with multiple models, Asian women that are actually like hot. And this has happened 4 times, probably more, but 4 times that I can remember. The first I have was Pleng, where I was kind of like, okay, yeah, yeah, she's, uh, definitely up there? Yeah, yeah, I'm like okay, yeah damn, okay! Second time this happened was Bim right— had my hand on her thigh and everything right... Third time we forgot about Mew QQ like remember in Bali two set open, I opened 2 girls at the same time and we had dinner with them the same day actually crazy, yes it's crazy you approached them in the pool yeah yeah yeah 4th time it happened, it was— I'm missing a few. Oh, oh, Jenny! Jenny!
Jenny! Jenny, man, how can we forget about Jenny?
Jenny was crazy. She's like a high-end model for like beauty products in Hong Kong. She was just dancing alone in like some dance floor in Bali. Steve Aounch and Sing Aounch had me approach her the first time and then the second time, and she would have closed on the first one, but not the second time, bro. I just took her hand, she just followed me. We had a drink, we Waited, stayed up till 3 AM, and only found out at the end she was a model, actually. Yeah, cuz I could tell she didn't want to talk about work, so I was just like, we're just vibing. I was giving her some dating advice. We had so much fun together. And the old— and she was taller than me, which is very intimidating, right, for me, cuz I like petite women, but I'm also a little scared of like dating taller women. Like, and I think about them, I was like, man, like, you've created all those things. Yeah, like I've went on like multiple dates with a lot of these different types of people. And then in contrast to that, like me and Siggy, like to make a long story short, we went on the speed dating event, right, in Bangkok. And we saw the difference between Seoul Game and doing everything else. Like, you know, the women were great, they were nice. There was one I was kind of into, but all the guys were like running after her type of thing. So she became a 9.5 instantly because of the environment we're in. Whereas I was looking at this, But I wasn't needy. I just thought it was funny. So I was like, oh my God, because of Seoul Game, like, I could just meet girls who are much more attractive alone with nobody and just like, yeah, and they're going to respect me way more for it. Oh yeah, 100%. The amount of dates and hooks and conversations I've been with Asian women. Yeah, crazy, crazy. At some point on that day, you're like, hey, see that girl? Yeah. I'm ready.
Yeah.
Hey, just go up to her and tell her she's cute. And I went, huh, wait, what do you mean? And then you were like, yeah, go up to her, same thing. What do you mean, like tell her? So that's what was my first introduction to my sexual energy, which I don't really had until this residency, because I never been with a woman. It was a very uncomfortable experience for me, right? And then you guys started coaching me on so many different things, and I was like, It's a lie. Whoa, wait a second. Started doing that and I wasn't expecting much, right? I did it once, I was really afraid. Hey, uh, excuse me, uh, do you speak English? They're like, yeah. I, I just thought you were cute. And they're like, okay. So I was like— and then I was shocked cuz I was like, wait, then why is this getting hard again? Like, I was— I just did like 100 video approaches. Why is this getting stressful? And it's 'Cause I remember, I actually remember this 'cause my back was hurting. I was sitting down and you're very good at calling this out. You were like, but you do it in such a nice way. "Hey, Brian, I see you haven't been doing the direct opener like I told you to. Like, you gotta do it." And I was like, "Hmm, okay." And I'm giving this context, this is important 'cause I think a lot of guys can relate to what I'm saying. 'Cause you guys might be making fun of me until you do it, okay? So don't be judging me. Right? The fact that I went from that to like moving my chair now in front of a girl, putting my hand on her thigh, playing with their hair, doing that in like 14 days is crazy.
We call them STB, Sexual Threat Brand Down. Let's go!
If I had to be honest, I guess it makes sense in retrospect why I do enjoy Seoul Game a lot more than I thought, because it's a clear— because I'm already insane as it is, and other is life. And hey, high risk, high reward, right? And the rewards are great. Amazing. Now I can really verbalize what makes your coaching very unique, actually, which we haven't really done yet, because in London I didn't really know what I didn't know. So there's a couple of things that Steve Bounce does really well that's very unique to your, to your approach and what you do. You really care very deeply about your clients. Like, there's a love that you have. This is why you're so picky. You remind me of me in that way. Actually, especially for the ones where you're putting a lot of time into. You have so much love for the client that even when you're not being paid, it's a very important distinction. That's why he's worth every penny. Even when you're not being paid, like, literally the last week you flew just because you wanted to. I never, I didn't expect you to. I just kind of a little bit didn't want you to either, right? From a little intense, right? But I'm really glad you did. Thank God. I'm glad you did actually, or else JT never would have happened. I would have given up long before that would have happened. The fact that you care so much about the client adds a lot of additional layers that I believe you're the only coach right now that is providing that level of service to people. You're able to understand the archetype of the girl that the guy is into and call them out on their bullshit. He'll switch into QFM. Second part of your game that's very lethal from a client perspective is your willingness to be patient with the client and say, hey, here's why we're here. Do you understand? Now that you understand, let's do a couple. Yeah, second part. And the third part that I really love, unique to you once again, you live with the client. What's happening now is we're talking about my sets throughout the entire day instead of it just being like, okay, you can just talk to me for 4 hours, bye. Bye. You know? I'm here with you. Let's do this. Let's implement this the next one. That's really what escalated my game. A bonus one that I'll add to your game. Well, you've already gamed here before. You're not coming from the perspective of, hey, look at me, I have a girlfriend, you have to listen to me now. No. Your perspective is, hey, I've approached 2,000 women in this city. Forget like in the city.
I'm still doing it with you.
Like, that's what I love about you so much is like when I make a request, if it's justifiable and it's helpful and it's adding to the vibe, you always say yes.
That's the context, right? Yeah, that's what we're here for anyway.
Yeah, so even 2 days ago, right? But he'll challenge you first, but if you fix, if you solve the challenge, he'll do it. So 2 days ago, Girl named Ping, really into the girl, really into. I tried everything, set 3 times, like did, did, she sat there and he was like, hey, I think that's who you should approach. And I was like, hey Steven, can you approach her? And you challenged me for it, dude, are you sure? Because hey, like you're into her, like if I go in, it's, yeah, it's over, it's game over. And I just went, no, actually, and I explained my thought and you were like, okay, and you did it anyways. You've also mapped out our results. You're manifesting for us. How do I make this happen in your meditations? I know you're doing that because I feel—
you know that I feel that every morning.
Yeah, no, I've been manifesting this for Brendon for a while. I see it. I'm gonna make sure this guy hits the shot. Yeah, like he's been taking so much action, I'm gonna make sure. Yeah, if you want to jump into Papa Club, number one, you need to be serious about finding your dream relationship. I'm doing this to get women. I'm doing this to get some results out of women. And it's still a little bit like that, but it's more so, no, no, no, I'm expanding my vibe diamond, my vibe vortex, in a way that gets everyone into my vibe. If your goal is just to get laid, if your goal is just to do something bad to women, or you don't have the right intent here, Papa Club is not for you, okay? We sniff that out right away. Like, the guys in this club— and that's why I really appreciate it, it's perfect for me— we're genuinely in this game to really find ourselves and to find the person who fits our vibe, right? Love, always.
We don't hurt others, we don't hurt ourselves, right? Complete our incompletions, right?
Yeah.
And then express our vibes to other people so we actually create love, you know?
And I'm not just saying this because he's my best friend. I'm not just saying this because I spent a lot of money on and I'll continue to. I'm saying this because I didn't have to go through 15 different pickup coaches, or— and he doesn't do pickup, he does cold approach, right? I've done all of that before. Yeah, I didn't have to do any of that. Are you willing to be open? Do you have a part of your vibe where you're actually trying to go after something? I love the nuance, whether you hit the goal or not, that's actually the most important piece.
Yeah, you are, you're the MVP, right, in this, uh, in in Papa Club, right? I mean, you've taken the most action.
Totally.
Right, you continue to take action. Yeah, like, I don't care. I don't care if you're like, if you haven't met your dream girlfriend yet. I mean, you just started this journey like 6 months ago, literally.
Right?
And like, you know, we talk about your feedback. You're always willing to take a look at that. Okay, let me consider that. Yeah, I'm gonna take action on that, okay?
Real pull of Papa Club is being around me and Siggy and Supamsh and maybe Charles. Charles, right? Being around like the community of Papa Club. So I think the final takeaway to all this, guys, is like proximity really is power.
100%.
When you— and the proximity is getting better and better in Papa Club every month, right? For those of you who are brave enough right, to jump into Papa Club and do this, I welcome you with open arms. We welcome you with open arms because you're joining a small group of individuals who will feel an abundance that 99.9999999% of men will never experience in their life. And for that, I am truly grateful. You know, man, I can never explain explain that feeling of going up to a girl after being rejected so many times, going up to a girl that you think you have no chance with, and you spend 4 hours with on a date and she's absolutely hooked into you. Bro, there's no amount of money in the world that you can buy you that. And billionaires try every day and they fail.
And that's why we call it Soul Game.
