DMS: Do Meaningful Stuff!

Now's the time to be doing more meaningful stuff, or dms, right? Why is that important now? How does it connect to the meaningful Revolution? What can we do about it? What are some common problems or how does this show up? We're going to get to that all here in a little bit on the Meaningful Revolution Podcast. Welcome to the Meaningful Revolution Podcast where we talk about people's passions and hope to inspire you to your own. We also answer the question, what if you could just add 1% more meaning to your life every day for the next year? So join us on this Meaningful Revolution. I'm your host, Sean Butner, certified High performance Coach. And we have a really great episode for you today. So let's get into it. Hey, everyone, this is Sean and I just wanted to say thanks for being here. I hope you're enjoying the podcast so far. If you've listened to the previous episodes. Thank you. Please comment and subscribe on Apple Podcasts and do the rating as that really helps me out, helps me get a gauge for what you guys are feeling and thinking about this, how I might course correct. But more importantly, helps get the word out and helps me, you know, just grow this podcast, which is something I really would love to do and I'd love your help with it. Right, so today we're going to be talking about doing meaningful things is part of this meaningful revolution. And so why is that important right now? Because when, especially here in America, we connect and we define ourselves so much by our jobs or the things that we're doing, and not so much by hereditary, not so much by social class, but. But things that we do. Right. And we really have this crisis of work, you know. So what do I mean by that? I mean that the opportunities for people that were craftsmen, the opportunity for things for people that were, you know, line workers, the opportunities for. For people that were in the service industry have completely changed over the last three. Three years as of this recording in 2022. And the big change has been, you know, hugely economic. So opportunities have shifted where people want to work, where people feel safe working where people feel safe and heard in organizations. You know, we're in this turmoilous turmoil. Turmoil. That word is just getting stuck in my mouth. It's been a very turbulent. It's another way of saying that, a very turbulent time in terms of organizations that are not performing or shutting down, organizations that could not adapt to where the world is right now and how people want to work, how people need to provide for their families and stuff, you know, business models that had low margin, are, you know, crashing and the next set of people that are going to be successful are happening right now. And that's what happens. And that's why it's important to connect with what you find meaningful in work or the things that you do. And that's how it relates to the meaningful revolution. Like this is the one of the big ideas of, you know, the world is being reinvented as we speak right now. And isn't it true that if you're going to succeed, you need to be able to adapt to that change? Right. Isn't it true that, you know, as much as things are changing right now, we need to have a way of letting go of old ways that don't serve us anymore. A way of letting go of old relationships that might be holding us back. Letting go of the things that make us feel dead inside and to awaken into, you know, the things that will help give us that performance that just help us push, help us contribute, help us put our good out into the world a lot more. So that's what we're dealing with here. That's kind of my two cents on where we're at at this current time. But what happens when we're not doing that meaningful stuff, right? We feel like we don't have control over our life, right? The things that we do. If you're stuck in a dead end job, if you're stuck in a relationship where people don't believe in you and don't support you, or don't care about you or abuse you, if you're stuck in how your health, right? You don't feel like you can control your weight or when you work out because you're working so much or because you have responsibilities that you have to step up and into, which is noble. But you're in that constant zone of feeling like you're burning out. You're feeling like you don't have the time to take care of your health, your well being, you don't have the time to connect with your family, to be there for the people around. You don't have the time to get everything done that you need to do at work. You're always behind the ball and you know, that's what happens. Again, when you feel like you're working on busy work or things that don't really matter or not relevant to your story, your situation, your family, all that kind of stuff. We also, if we're not working on meaningful stuff, we're not doing DMS for not DMSing. I guess I'll have to work on that anyways. You feel unchallenged. You don't feel like you're progressing. And it's because you're not growing your skill set right. You're not. Like, people love challenge. They love to be in that flow state. And if it's too easy and it's something that comes really natural to you, you get bored real quick and you feel restless. If it's too hard, it can shut you down to the point where you don't want to try because you just are bashing your head against the wall, against your desk, trying to figure it out. And you're not given that chance to feel that progress, see how you're growing. It can be really frustrating on that end. So, you know, we need to be finding situations and jobs and opportunities that are challenging the skill sets that we have. And we want to develop at the proper rate in the proper way in order for us to then feel growth, to feel like it's worth doing the thing right. And then sometimes when you're not DMSing, you feel like your actions won't help change. You don't have the agency to impact your environment, to impact your relationships, to, you know, actually see the fruits of your labor. So if you do double the work and don't double the results that you want, so you don't get twice as much, twice as many apples from twice as many trees. You don't. You're not getting double your salary or double the rate for doing more work. That leads to burnout. That gets people feeling like they're kind of stuck in a rut. And it also can add to this mindset of, like, what does it matter if what I do doesn't change my situation? Like, why try? And people kind of shut down and hold back. And that has been really detrimental over the last three years. Right. I think a lot of people have been in this waiting mindset of, oh, we need to figure out the pandemic and see what happens. We need to figure out the economy before I make a big career change or make a big move across the country. And we're in, like, I'll wait until X. But that's also limiting how we connect to what we're doing. That meaning that is generated by doing the things that are helpful that, again, advance our goals in life. So with all that said, I wanted to share a little bit about how you can assess meaning and something that you're doing. So if you're like, how can I assess if the job that I have is meaningful, or how can I assess the relationship if it's healthy or not, or it's something that's holding me back. Here's a quick model for you to really think up through. Like, you know, how on this leg of doing meaningful things is it really working for me? Right? So the first thing is autonomy. Like, are you in control of your own choices? When I was worked at Apple as a software engineer, they were really great at this because the first day when you walk in during orientation, there's a big presentation and there's a slide up there in the auditorium where Steve Jobs gave the first iPhone speech. And it says, we hired you because you're smart. And that because you're going to do the best work you've ever done here, right? And I love that messaging. It's really kind of amazing to communicate right off the bat. We trust you, we trust that you're smart. We're going to listen to what you think we should be doing because you, we hired you to do this, you know, and they proved the point during the five and a half years that I was there, where you were in control of your career. But a lot of times management or a client, internal client in my case, or, you know, customers would say, I have this problem with the technology. And everyone be like, how could we solve this, right? It's not one person saying, I have the idea and pushing it down everyone's throat. And I've had that experience in other corporations. But really, like, let's take a look at this problem that. That's. Get a couple of different perspectives. Let's try some stuff, right? Let's, let's do something and try to really see how this could manifest into a solution that everyone loves. And I think that's kind of the secret sauce of Apple. But it all comes down to that autonomy, right? I felt empowered to work on the things that I felt mattered, to solve problems in a way that I thought were fun and challenging. And ultimately, like, if you had a dud, you had a dud and you know, you'd have that conversation and move on. But you get that experience, you get that confidence, you get that check mark that, hey, that didn't work, but I now know a little bit more and I'll be better the next time I try it. So autonomy is such an important feature. And I think if we look at Jobs, if you're looking for a good job, you're looking for a good relationship. It's how much are you in control of your own choices, you know, and if you think about your life right now, on a scale of 1 to 10, how in control are you of your own choices? And. And anytime I do a reading, and you've probably been with me, if you've been with me in the podcast for a bit, you'll understand that this next question is give three words to explain why you rated yourself because you really want to think, like, why did I score a 7, a 10? Like, being the best, or one being, like, I have no control over anything. You know why. You know, those three words explain why, and then what do you do about it? And so the same thing is for this second idea of complexity, right? How are you able to master new skills and improve as you are working through all this? And so, again, it's like being in that flow state. It's being challenged appropriately, it's growing, it's learning. You know, a lot of times in personal development, they call this the learning mindset. But, you know, what are you able to do? How comfortable do you feel to try things right on your job? So another way to look at this, it could be like, are you allowed to make mistakes where you're at? Because all mistakes are not equal. You know, One of the best pieces of advice that I ever had in my tech career was when I worked at Walmart doing software. My very first manager pulled me aside one day after I messed something up, and he's like, hey, like, it's good that you're making mistakes as long as you're not making the same mistake, right? You want to be pushing yourself into a place where you're able to try things and learn and not be playing it so safe that you're not making a difference. Right? And I think that's such an important distinction, especially for you perfectionists out there. If you are someone that, like, I need to get it perfect the first time, you know, I'm cheering you on. I deal with this a lot in my coaching practice. And if you're. You're so focused on perfection, you're also not focused on learning and experimenting and being innovative and a lot of things that. That people look for in the workplace nowadays. So it's super important, you know, in your relationship, are you constantly bowling over the people around you or being bowled over by your spouse or friends, or are you challenging each other to be better human beings? Right. I think one of the things I feel very fortunate about with my wife is, you know, my wife Ashley and I is we're both challenging each other to be better people, to be the best that we can be in a way where, you know, I can tell her some things that I wouldn't maybe tell other people, she could do the same for me. And we have that. That intimacy and trust that it's not meant to hurt. It's meant to help. Help us grow, you know, And I think having that type of challenge in a relationship is also quite important. So, you know, again, how complex. How are you being challenged? How are you pushing and growing in your career and your relationships personally, you know, a very, very important thing. Rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 there. Do the three words and ask, you know, how could you improve that score? I think it'll serve you well. All right. The third thing is to directly connect your effort to rewards, right? So if you can say, like, if I take on this extra project in my business, it's going to increase my revenue by this measurable result, and my effort equals results, right? Because again, like we were talking about what. What holds people back and kind of shrinks their world is this feeling like their actions mean nothing. So how can you maybe make sure that the things you're doing are making a difference in your life, the life of your family and friends, the life of your organization's communities and whatnot, and really think, like, if I need to do X, right, if I need to do this project, if I need to volunteer to do this, what's the impact that it has in the world that is positive, right? And I think so many people are striving, you know, so many people, again, are, you know, sweating and bleeding, doing the work and not, you know, getting that promotion or, you know, there's so many different scenarios here, but what it comes down to is, you know, do you have a belief that you, by your actions can impact the things around you? And then on a scale of 1 to 10, how do you believe that? Do the three words, how can you improve it? You guys know the drill, but I think that's a really awesome quick assessment for how to know if something is going to be meaningful, is going to be fulfilling, is going to help you feel on purpose or not. So we got that. So that said, folks, you know, what are some strategies to do meaningful stuff? And I got five for you again, just because that's how we roll here. So I hope you like them. I know this has really helped my clients and it's helped myself in the years and years I've been in corporate America and running my own business, but especially the last few years, and people have been feeling a little Bit lost. If they've lost jobs, if they lost loved ones, they've lost that feeling of safety and stability. I think these can be really helpful and I've advised many people on this. So what are the five strategies? Right. First one is to set aside time each day to do something meaningful, right? At least an hour. And it could be doing the most important thing you need to do for work. It could be, you know, playing music for an hour. It could be gardening for an hour. It could be doing a walk out in nature for an hour. But whatever it is for you, that you find a sense of joy, that you find a sense of feeling more human, you know, I think it's a. We often neglect this part. It's always work, work, work, fit in time for family, maybe fit in time to do basic life things, hygiene, eat, you know, that kind of stuff, maybe work and then do things that we find light up our heart. So it's such an overlooked thing. And so many people that I've worked with have said, this is such a big change in what, you know, how I feel every day. Just because you spent a little time doing something you absolutely loved. So check that out. Second thing is to, you know, really do more meaningful things is to try a ton of things, right? It's tapping into, figuring out what you need to learn or what you want to learn or what's your thing. Find out what sticks and the things that you'll stick with, right? Because that, to me, you know, people, especially personal development, will say, follow your passion. And for me, a passion is something that you're interested in, that you're willing to stick with for forever, right? Because if one of those two areas are not there, that's when people quit. Or that's when you invest a bunch of money and then have a, like, garage full of kayaks and scuba gear and all these hobbies that you started but, you know, invested in and then didn't really follow through, right? So it's important to have tried all those things, but it's also important to really then focus those investments and stuff on the things you really love and think you'll love doing for quite a while. But more important, the most important thing is to be trying different things, engaging that novel part of your brain that's like, ah, this is cool, this is new. And that usually changes how people feel about themselves, about their lives and what they're doing. And it's super, super helpful. So try tons of things. Number three, do things in service to others, in service to causes and Ideas, Right. And this is kind of another way of saying, like, just love, you know, do the things that. That you love, but are with love in this particular case. So, you know, this is why your relationships, again, like from our last episode, are so important in helping us just feel alive, feel like we're connected. Because, you know, a lot of times parents do tons of things for their kids that you're in service of to make sure that they have a better life or that they're healthy and okay and good human beings out in the world. And it's super important. And I think we need more of that too, especially in a democracy, of remembering that we are all in this together, that we all have a common interest in sustaining what's going on and obeying laws and all that kind of stuff. And I think these are things, ideas that no matter where you are on that political spectrum, that we can all believe in, that, yeah, you know, people should be. Should follow the laws that we have or work to change them peacefully and all that kind of stuff. So without getting too much into that, that idea of what am I doing to help others, to advance things that are important to me, super important. So do the things that give service. And how could you level up your level of service to the people that you love or those around you or those in your community? I think that's a really, really special question that we don't ask ourselves enough. And I think you'd be surprised at what comes up and how you'll feel about it when you go out and do it. So there we go. Fourth thing. Connect to or connect with the things that you're responsible for. So sometimes, you know, we could have a job that's terrible. The boss is toxic, the environment's toxic. All the customers that come in the shop yell at you. But if you're doing it to put food on the table for your family, like, you can justify putting up with all that because it's serving, you know, again, serving. But it's you taking care of responsibility you have to your family, to a spouse or friend or leader or your, you know, responsibility as a citizen, you know, so making time to do the things like voting or getting involved in your local politics, stuff that we used to talk about in, like, civic studies that we don't do anymore, that I think, again, is really needed now. And in this world where a lot of things have changed, like, I think feeling that sense of control in the world can really come from taking responsibility for how you're showing up. Right. Are you pushing yourself right now to be your best, or are you kind of waiting again? Are you holding back, wondering when the next best time to strike is? So there's that number five. Recognize that there's art and beauty all around us, right? And I think this is one of the core tenets from Viktor Frankl's man's search for meaning. Where there is beauty in nature, there's beauty in art, there's beauty in technology and how things work, right? Like, you are probably listening to this either on a, you know, cell phone or a. Some type of laptop or computer where crazy technology is happening in order to get the voice that I'm projecting right now here in my podcast studio in my home, to you, wherever you're listening to it, right? It could be a signal, a digital signal bouncing off satellites in space and then figuring out where you are on the Earth and throwing the signal so that you can hear this, which is bonkers. Like, and if you're streaming, it could be like being the signal being translated into light being shot through fiber optic cables, miles and miles and miles and miles in a very weird kind of route to reach your technology so that you can listen to it. So that's the wonderment out there. And sometimes taking a moment to connect with it or to create your own art, to write a song, to write a poem, to write a book, to create something that is beautiful or beautiful to you or somebody that you care about can be really impactful and can be really meaningful. So that's why we really need to be searching for these meaningful pursuits. It. It's. Or why should we? And I think it's because it sometimes can cover up and help us be really more resilient. When we are doing meaningful things, we tend to complain less. We tend to have that perspective that, like, hey, like, things could be a lot worse. And you can invite that sense of gratitude into your life. And, you know, sometimes it also pushes us to be our best for ourselves, for the people around us, for, you know, the big community that we're all part of here on being on planet Earth. So I really hope that you enjoyed these five areas of doing more stuff, which is to set aside time to do stuff that's meaningful, to try a lot of things and stick with the things that you love and are passionate about, to do things with love, in service to others, to causes and ideas, to connect and remember the responsibility you have as an individual, as a partner, as someone in society, and to recognize the beauty and wonderment in all that's around us. Because if we can connect with that then our actions can be aligned to have meaning to really make a difference and make an impact out in the world. And that's in itself a very beautiful thing. So hope you enjoyed this episode. In our next episode we'll talk about how action is the fruit fruition of inspiration so we'll connect on this idea of inspiration and the Meaningful Revolution and I'm really excited to share that with you. Thank you for your time. We'll see you in the next episode. Thank you for listening to the Meaningful Revolution podcast. I hope you enjoyed this episode and if you could please share this episode with three people that you think might enjoy it and like and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. Leave a comment Please rate us because that helps us get the word out. So until next time listen to the next episode right after this. I know you'll love it and we'll see you then. Take care of.