In this solo monologue, certified high‑performance coach Sean Buttner addresses the pervasive anger and emotional volatility of modern life, from social‑media flare‑ups to everyday irritations like a barista’s mistake. He argues that the root of these outbursts is often a power imbalance or a perceived sense of superiority, and that the most effective response is not retaliation but calm, kind de‑escalation. Buttner outlines practical tactics—pausing, asking quiet questions, disengaging, and refusing to label others—to maintain emotional composure and model healthier behavior. He emphasizes that staying cool requires courage and intentional choice, and that individuals can become “heroes” who shift collective energy toward positivity. The video concludes with a call‑to‑action promoting his free training, “Six Secrets of High Performance and Success,” and encourages viewers to apply these principles for greater personal growth, joy, and community impact.
Chapters
Sa. All right. Good morning, everyone. Welcome to start your day. Great. Start your day with a coach. I am your host, certified high performance coach Sean Butner. And you know, it's Friday and we're talking about things that keep you on your A game, keep you progressing in your life, help you grow, move forward, push through struggles and all of that nature in a personal development and high performance context. Now, today we're talking about the importance of keeping cool, right? Because in a toxic world where one tweet, one post, one piece of news, one somebody not making your coffee right at the coffee shop, people are so quick to hit emotional Armageddon, so quick to. To hit that. Just unleashing on people in a very cruddy way. You know, we need a new hero, and that hero can be you, right? And it's to not instigate that type of behavior and not respond when people are angry or in judgment or cruel or just emotionally lashing out, right? We don't have to respond in kind, but we can respond in kindness. And it's something that I really believe can help shift the energy. Because I'm not sure about you guys, but if you've noticed the energy this past year, it's people feeling really tired, it's people feeling really angry, and people not having a good channel for a lot of their emotion. And so some of the things that we had kind of been singing the last probably 20 years, right, those bad behaviors have been really amplified. And so that's kind of where I'm coming from with this video today. And just thinking about, like, you know, is there a better way? Is there a something else that we can do personally in order to help shift that energy, right? And so in order to shift that energy, it's not just on me, it's also on you. And so this is a call to action, to not respond to jerks, right? When people are being really tough to love, you know, we can change the energy by not taking in that energy. And that's the importance of keeping cool. That's the importance of having strong opinions, having strong emotional reactions to things, but having that split second to then say, what do I really want here in the situation? Or how do I want to role model in this situation? Because when we don't do that, that's when you start screaming that guy's face. That's when you yell at the checkout person for missing a penny on your change or some other very small inconvenience that is disproportionately has disproportional emotionality poured into it, right? Because, I mean, the truth is it's never about the thing that's happening. It's about the person. Right? It's the character of someone who will treat someone poorly because they perceive they have a lot more power over them, like in a retail situation, or they have power over them confronting them on the bus, you know, or out at a park because they're barbecuing. This power differential of I'm going to mess up your life because I can, or because I'm not thinking about the consequences of my actions or because I'm angry or annoyed or I think you're a bad person or all these types of things, you could classify it all under flaming arrows of the Internet. I like that phrase. But in those moments, right, where we have this, you know, lashing out, this angry, negative energy, you know, the most courageous thing you can do is to respond in kindness, to respond with understanding. And it's tough. It's not easy. I'm not saying that this is just a be happy and, you know, don't let people get to you type thing like it's gonna happen. But the best thing for you to do is to role model good behavior. Like, you could take it and then say, not my problem. That's on them and not me. You can ask quiet questions, you know, try to de escalate. And ultimately, if someone is not being reasonable, you don't have to deal with them. You can just say, you know what? Okay, see you later. You know, there's always that option in it too, so. But that takes courage. It takes courage to not get back in their faces. It takes courage not to assume that some abstract big label applies to them. You know, political label, racial label, you know, you, not. You name it, you can think it up. Like, it's really dangerous to paint people in abstract terms because it dehumanizes them. And so we don't want to do that. They might do that to you, but just don't respond. Not reactive, not your, not nothing about you, more about them. So that's the idea and the importance of keeping cool. Guys, I hope you enjoyed this video. Something that I'm still kind of working my way through as a human being, as a coach, as someone that is out in the world and, you know, really gets upset when I see people treat others port like, you know, we're all taught to treat others with respect growing up, and many of us follow it. Some of us think in certain situations that doesn't apply, but ultimately it does. I think but now I feel like I'm getting into the soapbox ranty part of the video. So any case if you are looking to find that calm center more often in your life I want to let you know I have a free video training called the six Secrets of High Performance and Success that helps you know you succeed more and it's the common thread between the highest performing most successful people on the planet. So if you want to know what those six secrets are you can see the link in my bio or below where you're watching this video. As always if you have any questions let me know and be the hero we need right now. Be the person that can de escalate or bring that positive energy because that is what is I think the most courageous thing you can do today. So that said guys go out there live with more joy, more personal growth, more impact in your communities and I will see you next week. Take care.
