#136: Preserving Love's Legacy: How Artifact Captures and Celebrates Our Relationship Stories

That urge to express, I think, is so powerful. And if you think about our lives, our modern lives, really, weddings, funerals, those are the times people get together and they're in a mood to sort of tell stories. If you're at a funeral, it's too late to tell that person how much you love them, how much they meant to you.

Hey.

Thank you for coming. Welcome to the Love Shack.

Hello. Welcome to the Love Shack. It's a little old place where we get to get together, explore fresh perspectives, and eavesdrop on juicy conversations in an attempt to uncover the things that really matter while having a little bit of fun along the way. This is episode number 136, Preserving Love's Legacy. How the company Artifact captures and celebrates our relationship stories and how it is that Tom and I came to discover them, as well as a family member that we gave this gift to you happens to be with us as well. And we're going to unfold this incredible experience for you right here live on the podcast. Because here's the thing. Have you ever noticed how quickly the wonderful moments of our lives flow right on through and the challenges seem to hang around, often for much longer than we would prefer. So much so we can forget that there's any good in our lives at all, as well as the people that we love. Especially when we experience months, sometimes years, of what seems like an endless stream of struggle unless we sit our butts down and we put some focus and thought into remembering the good in ourselves, in our lovers and in our lives. Our Ironically, this is often difficult to do, but however it is the counterpunch to easing our suffering and reconnecting us to those we love once again. Essentially, when we reach for and remember the good moments and stories in our lives, it refuels our emotional gas tanks for the journey ahead. Today, we are so thrilled to have you join us for a powerful conversation with the co founder of Artifact, George. He is on the house with us. And another dear person, probably one of my favorite human beings in the whole wide world, David Woodspart. And he is here as a brother in law family member. But if you are a listener to our podcast, you've probably heard us have a couple of conversations. But here's the thing. I want you to know about George first, and then I'll talk about Woody. George is part of creating a platform where we can share our feelings and experiences with the people that matter to us most. Artifact handles the scheduling of the interviews, the interviews themselves conducted with their journalists, and then the editing of the audio Recording. The end result is a polished podcast with a password protected webpage that's ready to share with whomever you choose to share the link with. And David, well, he's incredible too. He travels the world as a mental health advocate, helping people create connection and hope in their lives and offsetting the devastating effects of suicide. He's traveled to military bases all over the world and he has a powerful message. But today his message is going to be his experience of receiving from the people that love him what it was like to receive our thoughts and perspectives on what Woody means to us, which is an experience that quite frankly, we don't receive very often in our lives. So we bring these men together with our experiences in the hopes that you might see how powerful and impactful doing such a thing of remembering the stories and telling those stories from your perspective as to why it is you care and appreciate the people in your life. So I want to begin with asking George the catalyst behind this idea of artifact. George, tell us about how it is artifact came to be.

Yeah, guys, thanks for having me. I really appreciate it. And what a beautiful introduction. We could use some help with the copywriting, I think sometimes with, hey, what is this thing? So I appreciate that. It started. My background is as a journalist. I was mostly an editor and I, I worked magazines, books. I launched my own very small soccer magazine. And as part of that I had to teach myself how to make podcasts because you can't have a media outlet without a podcast these days. And meanwhile I have a very close friend who lives out in San Francisco. He's a tech guy and he was visiting his in laws live near where I live in St. Petersburg, Florida. And we were having a beer one night about six years and he was very upset. His grandfather had just passed away. His grandpa had this amazing life. His name was Gene and he was a labor organizer in Buffalo. Mid century. He had been called in front of the House UN American Activities Committee to testify during the Red Scare. Just like really interesting past. And Ross had never really asked him about it for a variety of reasons. Oh, I don't know what to ask. There's always next time. I'll get him next time. Everyone's busy. Hey, I'll get this on my phone. What am I going to do with it? The old version is I'm going to have a tape in a shoebox and it's just going to sit there. And he was burning mad that he had never done this. And he was telling me, hey, I'm going to work with a Software engineer I know to write some code that can interview people and store it. And I didn't mean to laugh at him, but I had to laugh. And I said, look, hire a journalist. Get a journalist to do this. That's what we do. And we're going to do a much better job than a machine. That may not be true anymore, but I still think it is. Because really, a lot of it, it's not just the initial question, right? It's the poking and prodding and, like the zeroing in on what was interesting about what you just said and asking you to go deeper there, right? And so we said, hey, you know what? Let's figure this out. Ross's aunt Cindy was about to turn 59 years old. I'd never met Cindy, but I called up her three closest friends. She'd known these women since one, since she was two years old. Another, they were undergrads at Rutgers together. The third, they were young mothers in New Jersey when they met. And I just interviewed these women about their relationship with Cindy. Cindy had no idea we were doing this. I edited those conversations into a about a 30 minute podcast, right? For lack of a better term, and we gave it to her. And Ross's cousin sat her down at the kitchen table the night of her birthday and hit play on this phone and just took a video of her actually listening to this.

And.

And what we saw was a woman on the verge of tears and laughter for about half an hour. Woody, this is sort of the experience. I don't know if you were crying and laughing, but this is sort of. That was the first time we did one of these, you know, that you got to experience. And we just thought, oh, interesting. Strong reaction. I think, to cut the story short, I know I've been talking for a while. The insight that we had was that the interview format is very powerful. Whether it's Oprah or Terry Gross or Howard Stern or Jerry Springer, people love the interview. Most people are not natural storytellers, but nobody's interviewing your mom, your grandpa, your cousin. The people we really want to hear from and the people that it's really important that we capture and then be able to pass down their stories in their own words.

Think about it.

We're all related to people who were alive a thousand years ago, which is an amazing thought. We didn't have a way to find out what life was like in the hovel or the cave, but now we do, and we can pass that on to our own ancestors, which sounds pretty highfalutin, but it's actually what we're trying to make possible for people. Let me stop there. And hopefully that explains how we got to where we are.

Oh, yeah. Well, I'll just say I remember the moment. It was actually Tom who found this. We were all collectively wondering what to do with six for Woody's 60th birthday party. And the family was clamoring like, gosh, what do we get a guy that kind of has everything? And how could we make this special? And then as we. And because of the work that we do, I'll probably not get through this episode without getting a bit emotional myself, because we're talking about somebody in my life that I really love and care about. It was, like, from the gift giving perspective, what is something that you can give to somebody that communicates how much you love them? Like, how much they have impacted your life and the many, many ways and reasons as to why it is. They've become a fundamental part of who you are. Right. And that's a tall order. And I know that from the work that I do and just even from my own personal experience. We long to not only receive those things, but we long to know how to express them. And so I'll never forget the moment where, babe, you come busting out of your office door and saying, oh, my gosh, I've got it. I found this thing on the Internet. It's artifact, and we can record our stories. And he just went on, on and describe the process and everything he knew about it. And at first I'm like, huh? What? What? Oh, okay, I like where you're going here. I understand the acknowledgement and the appreciation factor. And gosh, that's what Woody's about. He's an acknowledgement expert. So, yeah, I think you're onto something that.

That urge to express, I think is so powerful. And if you think about the. Our lives, our modern lives, really, weddings, funerals, those are the times people get together and they're in a mood to sort of tell stories. If you're at a funeral, it's too late to tell that person how much you love them, how much they meant to you. I think that one of the metaphors we used to describe this early on was like, it's a little bit like hearing your own eulogy. Hopefully not morbid.

No, not at all.

But I feel that urge sometimes. I want to text a friend and just say, hey, I'm thinking about you. And I think it taps into something similar.

Absolutely. We have a birthday ritual that we do throughout our family, even from the little to the old where on their birthday we'll have a gathering and then we all go around the table and acknowledge them for what we see as far as their growth or the way that they've touched our life or what's impactful. And it's amazing. Even like the 2 and 3, 3 year olds as they've grown have participated in this and they get that opportunity to express right. About their brothers, their sisters, their mom, their dads, their grandparents. And we found that to be an incredibly profound ritual that we do.

I would just add we've got our youngest grand grandchild grandson. This started when he was literally a baby. And if we're lagging behind because we are not where we used to be when we are acknowledging Woody basically in this that he's going to share with us, but he will say, hey, when's the acknowledgement ceremony going to happen? Here's a child now, he's in the whopping fifth grade, he's asking for it, like, think that is incredible because isn't this what everybody does on their birthday and they sit at the head of the table with a special placemat. Just shows you that none of us ever, I think, don't appreciate being appreciated.

Yeah, yeah, no, it's a little off topic. We have a. I have a 4 year old and a 20 month old and I think that just. My wife specializes in social, emotional learning. She's a teacher. And one thing I'm really grateful for is her emphasis on that as we raise these kids, like just hearing our daughter say things where I'm like, man, that was emotionally very mature. I'm shocked to hear that come out of the mouth of a three year old. And it sounds like you guys are like raising kids, attempting to do something similar, which I just think is so powerful, so important.

Yeah, I agree. So let's talk about maybe the experience of creating this and what it was like on this side of creating this.

Yeah, actually.

And I think I shared this with you, George. I heard about your company on a wonderful the 70 over 70 podcast.

Yes.

Which is a fabulous podcast. And anyway, so I said, wow, David can share, but he's a huge person, has inspired all of us. We can acknowledge people and it isn't even really that hard just by simply remembering their names, some very simple things. But anyway, I said, well, what a perfect thing for us to do. And then I reached out to my two other brothers and they said, absolutely that. Let's do that. And so it was just like the perfect fit at the perfect time. And David's wonderful fiance was putting this all together as a surprise on top of it. And yeah, it was just like the perfect discovery. We say Gus, God, universe, spirit provided this resource that I had no idea about. And then it was just a delightful experience from front to back.

Well, so we were parked under a tree in our car. Tom and I, we were just driving.

Yeah, we were driving home. We were all in different places too, which is really important. All of us from different parts of the country. And you're wonderful. I apologize. I can't remember the wonderful interviewers, the.

Email that looks it up. You spoke with Lee Gaines.

Okay.

Awesome. Yes.

So Lee just started asking us questions. And for us, even the people who were expressing these things as she asked the questions, what came up and the stories that you wanted to share. And of course, time we were all done, the whole group was just kind of teary. We had the same experience you described. And the recipient of gift of laughing and crying and remembering these wonderful moments. So it was. We drove away and we talked about it all the way home, two and a half hours. We talked about the experience and how it impacted us and how cool it was going to be. And. And we were so excited to finally give this gift. And so that's just an. It was an incredible experience on the gift giving.

So to the listeners, some context. So there. David and I are one of. We're two of four brothers. So there was our other two brothers. And then Stacy and I were together in the car. We were driving. So we pulled off because we didn't have too much road noise. We wanted to be in somewhere quiet. And then another brother was one where else. Another brother was somewhere else. And then our wonderful interviewer, she was somewhere else. So the powers of technology, it was all audio only. It was very straightforward, very convenient. And she just. Yeah, she did a wonderful job of. We. We are not at a for words our family, George. So she did a good job at.

Keeping us on task.

And you're right, George, in that we don't ever interview like moms and dads and brothers and siblings and lovers. Right. We just don't even think to do that. And the interview process is so powerful. I was shocked and amazed about what came out of that interview. And she did a fantastic job.

I'm glad to hear you guys say that. That's really meaningful. Thank you.

Yeah. So, David, what was it like? Describe your experience. Here we are at your birthday party.

Well, number one, you were surpr right when you walked in the door.

I mean, George, it was Ridiculous. I was so, so surprised. And this is the second surprise that my beloved has given to me. So I just totally. Yeah. And I love my birthday. I have always loved my birthday. It's January 12th.

Just.

Just so you know, you get praised. Oh, my God.

Yeah. I mean, who wouldn't know?

But some people. It's funny, George. Some people are like, oh, I don't forget my birthday. Like, okay, whatever. I'll take yours as well, if you'd like. And I say, look, I'm early in the month.

Take the whole month.

It's okay if you don't contain your. But there's a few things I need to say, George. One, you're amazing. Tom and I. There's a minister that was a huge influence, and he talked about this thing. He looked at life in a lot of different ways. And this is not about theology. It is, to your point, about this deep desire to express, especially from the youthful standpoint that the minister talked about, that we think we give a child a stuffed animal so that he will feel loved. But the minister said actually his belief was no, because children have the innate need to love something. And I'm like, oh, my gosh, you're right. The other thing, I think that the foundation, and you may know the quote, what I do, I'm all about words, is William James's quote that says, the deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated. And in my work is so that this is what you do. You. And for me, it's not. You think, okay, you got to tell people a good job. No, that's not it. It's not appreciated for what you do. It's appreciated for who you are. So that was my experience. And I think I'm a suicide attempt survivor. I have battled this monster of depression for most all of my life. We lost our father when I was seven. I was raped by a Boy Scout leader when I was 11. And only say those things is be so at a developmental period. I didn't have somebody like your beloved wife to help me unravel some of this. And the reason I bring this up is to talk about how I still struggle with feeling insignificant. Terribly. The antidote to that is you. Because I think for somebody like me, it is so easy to forget who we are. For people that, like, really, you would take all this effort to go and not just throw me a surprise party, but you would actually find this soul who is so passionate to remind people that, yes, indeed, do matter, and you have that, then if you forget, like, on your Bad days. Oh, yeah. I can go ahead and replay it. That's extraordinary. And in fact, I just wrote myself a note. This is my lane. What I would share with you. There's a whole other opportunity, I think that you have to market this to people like me, that it wouldn't just be about the six year or anything else. Because I'm telling you, brother, there are people out there that are so. They're dying to know how people feel. And your product, if I may, which really, that sounds too sterile, your genius and your brilliance and your compassionate creativity for somebody to be able to. In that moment when people say, why didn't you pick up the phone and tell me you were in trouble? Because you can't. Like, that phone weighs a million pounds. You can't even think about it. But I can push a button on a computer and hear this in the background so this thing can save lives. I can promise you it is that powerful. And for me, it's. Yeah, I can't underscore enough of the power of the monster to distort truth and initiate belief. Now, belief is unique. There are people who believe the world is flat. There is a great number of flat earthers. There are people who believe that the world that whales create, weather. There are people who believe that 911 was a scripted event. There's all kinds. That's the power of belief. Believe feelings don't relate to reality. Oftentimes this thing, suicide. My expertise, be it as it may, is all about feelings. And so when you are confronted in the most powerful way with what the absolute truth is that these people in my life said, no, no, no. This is our experience of you. But because of what you have been compassionate, I can't imagine the amount of money and hours, failures, successes, the continuation to be able to get the product to the point where it's so polished, like what you've invested, please know it's not just, hey, happy birthday. What you have, George, is something that can literally have people pause in the moment, feel connected, feel seen, heard and valued, which is the foundation of connection. Thus have hope, hold on. Pain ends in the moment. To get to the end of the day, that can be a game changer. And I think that's what you have. I know what it feels like. I know what it feels like to just. I know these people love me. But then to all this in the package that you have. Tell you what, brother, some good stuff.

I just don't want to feel that is what a power. Thank you for sharing that. Just wow.

And If I may have, there's another thing you said. I don't know if you read the book Tuesdays with Maury by Mitch Albom, famous book. And I'll tell you what, it's an amazing book. I just read another of his new books and then I'm reading the another one and you made a reference to this that might have been kind of funny. But here's the thing. So the first book, Tuesdays with Maury, was a nonfiction book, quintessential meeting with an old master at the end of life. And one of the things that came up was to something that you alluded to was why don't we do celebrations of life when we know somebody is coming towards the end of life? Why don't we do them now? Don't wait. Now you have the perfect vehicle to do that.

That.

And I'm just like, wow. So I wanted to put that out to just. I think if we can have people to get their mind around that. It goes to your point, like at a wedding and a funeral. Oh, gosh, I wish I would have said this in the conversation, like, oh, you know what I forgot to say. Okay, pause. We have the technology. Let's do an edit retake take two and go here.

Please don't.

I mean, yeah, I could go on for days.

And that powerful distinction is yours. You know, I mean, I think that's right from the lion's mouth, so to speak. But what he take us. I would love your ability to capture story and share with us your specific experience when summer your beloved had the artifact on your big screen tv.

Well, first I was confused because there is nothing like it but stiff. And I'm a big one on texting and I'm a debate for a second. Please don't diminish the power, George. When you're thinking to somebody and you say, hey, man, I just want to let you know I'm thinking of you. I can tell you story after story after story of what that does. But first I'm confused. So, I mean, in a really good way, because it's different. It's not that the same old, same old. Sometimes the same old same old is really good. There's nothing wrong with that. But this is just so new. Like I'm like. So it took me a little while, quite frankly, to kind of think, okay, okay. And then, you know, again, it's. For me in my life, it is so easy to this day to forget who I am or who I may possibly be in another person's life. And Then to hear these, the pillars of my life, then recall specific stories like, oh, yeah, I forgot the story that you tell about me. And then it. Just to have that be reminded in such a powerful way, it just. It's so. It's so engrossing that it really takes you. Takes your mind a little. I remember kind of being in there trying to process, like just trying to catch up to. It's just so unique. It's so different. It took me a while to catch up to what was going on. Not that I couldn't hear it, but it was just so over the top.

Great for our listeners. So we had it on that. Because the wonderful part of your platform, George, is it's audio. But then you ask, like, family members to supply photographs and things. And so for the listener out there or for your watch on YouTube. So the pictures that we supply, Artifact, which was part of this wonderful final finished product, if you will, is audio and visual. So on David and Summers, Woody's big tv, we had the audio as well as the pictures continuously scrolling. And then all of us at the party with David were experiencing this. Just like you described, George. You were filming that first time. We were doing it in real time.

I was gonna say we also had a video recently. Just want to make sure that that's. Oh, we think of it almost like we're inching closer and closer to. To a documentary feel. What is a. What is a Ken Burns documentary? It's someone talking while archival images and videos playing. We're trying to get a little closer and closer to that. I will say one thing, Woody, that you said that really resonated with me is there's this word that I love. Stacey, I'm sure you're familiar with the concept of sonder. Have you heard this. This word? This is the concept that everyone else's life is as complex as your own. We think of ourselves as like the protagonist, the main character. But hearing. Hearing about yourself as a character, a supporting character, maybe in someone else's life is maybe a profound experience and something that is, like, actually really helpful to help ground us maybe and understand, like, oh, yeah, that's role in. In this family, in this person's life.

No, I totally agree, because I think I'm just going to, as I say, stay in my lane. This thing that I probably will battle for the rest of my life, which is not always the case with people. People can have episodes. I'm not talking about, like, oh, I'm having a bad day. But there can be stretches in which really My whole work is the impact of trauma. Which by its definition is just. Not just. It's an extremely upsetting situation to be anything. Whole thing can just change the way not only you see yourself, but the way that you see the world. When you're given the opportunity to be reminded to your point of who you are. You sit there and watch that. I'm like, now that was a good day. I mean, it was my birthday, but I can watch that now on a bad day. Because that whole thing, man, you can forget it. So, yeah, okay, this is who I am. Not just this is who I am as David Woods Bartley. But this is what I really. I guess even more to what you said, George, this is what I mean to other people. People. Because it is so easy to forget that you have any meaning. Like you don't matter at all. And what I like to say is people need an experience of matter. I need an experience of matter. Like, oh my God. It's taken me a long time to realize if I weren't here, it would have a devastating impact. And it's not because. It's not because of anything. But I'm worthy. And you think, well, yeah, of course you're worthy. Let me tell you what that is something I battle every single day. You're what you have provided gives this. It's a mirror, but it's not a mirror. I guess it is a mirror in the sense that I am looking at myself, but I'm actually looking at myself simultaneously. My view, but it's being supported by another view. So now you have this thing with the monster. The view is totally distorted. Our brains can't hold competing thoughts. Let's say I was having a terrible day, which I still do at times. Let's say I was feeling suicidal, which at times I still do. I know what to do to get to the end of the day. But let's say in this moment, being connected with a brand new brother, and then my brother and my sister in law on my knees, it is impossible. It is the safety mechanism of my brain to hold a competing thought. Now, at the end of it, I could think about killing myself. But I can. In the moment. What you have created allows people to have the profound experience of connection. Seen, heard, valued. Pause. Can't hold a competing thought. Maybe the pause is long enough where I. Okay, you know what? Let me just get to bed. Let me just get to bed. That may be enough. Then let you know. What?

What?

Let me watch this thing again tomorrow.

You can have it without reaching out to anybody.

Exactly. And see, to Brookie's point, that's the thing. Because people.

And I get it.

And it's just because of people's pain. Why didn't you call on me? Because you know what? I couldn't. That doesn't make any sense. No, it doesn't. The thing doesn't make sense.

Yeah. I just want to bring this back to how simple it can be. Even maybe I'm not struggling or somebody that I love is struggling, but we're just struggling in our relationship. Right. We're stuck in a pattern of manipulation and defensiveness, and we've overdrawn the bank account, the kids are driving us crazy, and I'm overwhelmed and I've got less sleep and. And then there's a. That there's a emotional principle here, that if I don't know what to do with my emotional pain, I'm going to act it out. Those are the two options we have as a human being. And sometimes we forget that the person that I'm co creating life with is somebody in my life that I love and that I care about, because I'm just trying to keep my own wills on. And when we can have that reminder of, oh, wait a minute, wow, they do love me. I can be reminded that I matter. I can be reminded of the role that I play in their lives. It can help you be get through so much, even if you're the person expressing it or you're the person receiving it. Just as we've talked about here in this beautiful gift and the ability to produce it. It works the same if I do it just in my relationship with my special someone. The giver and the receiver both are recipients of something that goes, oh, yeah, I do like you. Oh, yeah, I do want to do life with you. I completely forgot because I've been such a hot mess and I've been so frustrated and I've been taking this all out on you, and gosh, let's just push the reset button by push play and we can sit down on the couch. Maybe we give one to each other so that in those moments we can remind ourselves primarily, I do care. I do want this. You do matter to me.

Mom, too. You always talk about how emotions are like time travel, but you mostly talk about it in. In a bad sense, where if you get back to that painful place, you travel back in time to the place where you were hurt. But by using Georgia platform, you could time travel back to the good parts. You know, you could record the story of when you first met or your first kiss or your wedding day or the day your child was born. The happiest moments of your life in your relationship. And you could have them at your fingertips all the time to do what you guys just said, where you could remember why you are in this relationship and why you care.

Hey, George. In fact, I think speak to that, because I don't. I know. I've read that. That's one of the suggestions that your platform, like you all suggest, right. You can. This can be episodic, so to speak.

Right.

Am I correct in that?

You are.

We have a.

As Woody said, it's. It does feel a little weird sometimes called a product, but we do have different products. But you received. What do we call the portrait, right? It's other people's view of you. They see you and they're describing you to, to the interviewer, right? Telling them why you're meaningful to them. We do the life story, right? The life story. Usually for people I don't know, we do anyone really 50s to. To interview people in their hundreds. Honestly, over time we realized, hey, people need a little bit of guidance here. So we typically do that. The life story package is three. Three interviews, three hour interviews. The first one is childhood. Second one is coming of age. We call it. Whether that's for you joining the military, going to college, getting that first job, whatever it is. Third one we call family life and career, which is just broad enough to really probably cover most people. And then it's very common for people to hear that and say, I bought one for my mom and say, oh, mom, I didn't realize you were in the circus for a year. Let's add an episode about that. So, so people do add. We've done, we've done interviews with people who have just been married, right? Hey, tell us, record your love story now because it's going to be fresh. And your kids one day, if you have kids, are going to get to hear this in a way that you will not be able to express it when you're in your 40s or 50s. You know, I'm 40. I know how much I've forgotten. Now is the time for me to record about my 20s and my 30s because it's. I remember it. I have some perspective now. And I'll say, we also have young kids and we have a product for parents with young kids instead of the baby book or in addition to the baby book. Honestly, ours has sat on the table, the shelf for months and months without being touched. But we can talk about our kids all day. And so it's a chance for us, to, my wife and I, to sit down and sort of reflect and capture our thoughts and feelings about them in the moment, so that when they are. I didn't start thinking about this until I had kids. I didn't think to ask my parents, like, hey, what was I like? And no, by now they don't remember. The memories are very vague. But one day we'll be able to send this to our kids and say, hey, if you want to know what we were thinking about and feeling when we were raising you, because you sort of realize when you have kids, you don't have all the answers. You realize, wait, my parents were just like, flying by the seat of their pants, like, like, I am. That's crazy. But now we can express that in a way that, that hopefully she'll want to understand and see how we see her at this moment, which is so precious and so, like, just uncapturable otherwise.

Well, something I read on your blog post is you've also had the story of the gentleman who ended up merging, I think, with a company. And all of the people that he had worked with and the investors had basically shared their stories and experiences about how they admired him as a leader and what they've done to get him through this very difficult thing. And if I recall, he mentions that it literally changed the way he saw the last four years. He was thinking of it as more of a failed kind of an attempt and merging was better than an IPO or a straight up sell. And I just thought, you know, even in moments like that, we forget that life is relationships, right? We forget that if we're dealing with another human being, then there's a relational component that is taking place there in our human experience. And so literally this could be used for a myriad of different reasons and put in different contexts.

Yeah, no, totally. And I will say life. Life is complex, right? Life is textured. And the tools we have for expressing those things right now that most people use are really for, like, mass consumption. They don't prioritize nuance. They don't prioritize, like, difficult stories. And so I'll give you another example. We also help high school athletics coaches talk about their seasons. And I was recently interviewing the coaches of a swim program in Long Beach, California. They had won 49 strokes. Great. Really big year for them. And we did a season preview, we did a mid season check in, and then we did a season in review and spoiler alert, they did not win the 50th and so I knew that I had been. I'd been, like, refreshing my browser. I was really invested at this point. I don't live anywhere near Long Beach. And I noticed, I saw that they had lost, and I was like, oh, no, these guys aren't going to want to talk to me, right? They're going to be like, ah, thanks. That was fun. What ended up happening was they showed up and it was three coaches, the head coach and two assistants and. And the two captains, seniors. One of the assistant coaches had been a freshman or a sophomore when the streak started in the 1970s. Oh, gosh, these people. And the two coaches had also swum at this school and had been part of the streak. What ended up happening was they turned out to be grateful for an opportunity to celebrate their teammates, to celebrate this streak, and to contextualize the difficulty of a season that, like, if you just saw the box score is one story, but for these people who lived in, it is a completely different story. And it's not a failure. It's a. It's an experience. And we all know this. Like, what is high school athletics all about, really? It's about relationships. It's about learning experiences. And that just became so clear to me in talking to them. It's a way to express the difficulties of life, not just the good things, in a way that really makes sense. You hear someone, you hear. I think about this with our product for young parents all the time. It's one thing to, like, write a sentence about your child. It's a totally different thing for that child to hear the love in your voice. And as you're expressing this thing, like, I could be talking about how frustrating my daughter is in. In one aspect of her life. And like, that same exact. Those same exact words land so differently if she's reading it on the page versus if she's hearing me talk about how much I struggle with her through this thing that she's trying to deal with. So anyway, wanted to latch onto what you just said, and really, it really speaks to me, so I totally agree.

We don't realize that. That our voice and the way it sounds is a touch point of intimacy. Yes.

Smell, right? You smell a type of food that takes you back to your childhood. Hearing your mother's voice is. Is absolutely. There's nothing else like that.

Right.

So, yeah, this is why you're in good hands. AI. I'll never be able to replace the interview process because it's not a human experience that's going back and forth right there. There's that element of humanness that we need to be able to express how it is we feel about those that we love and care about or want to acknowledge and appreciate in our world and all those myriad of containers. So, listener, I hope that you're being. Being inspired by all the many ways that you could use this product, this platform that has the power to literally transform and save lives. It has the power to transport you in that time travel experience. That emotion can take us in, and it absolutely can change your life in a moment and remind us of some very fundamental, important, key principles about what it is to be human and some of the upsides of it, not just the challenges of it.

And I would just add, Add. I'll just speak personally what you know, and George, you referenced something. We think about these things, but then we don't act on them. And so my point here is reach out to Artifact. Reach out to George company and body of work because it's very convenient. They. Their process removes the friction and the things that we don't act on. It's literally as easy as just getting on the phone. That's all that's required. And then you're asked, go ahead.

As the buyer, you just give us, give us the email address of the person you want to talk to.

Yeah, I mean, it.

We do it anyway. We try to make that clear to people, Tom. But like the inertia of life, I know it's tough to surmount sometimes, you know, so.

And, and George, it. It, you guys, it is, it is so simple. It is so simple. And they take care of the scheduling and the interviewing and the editing, and you get this completed product. And so it. Don't miss your opportunity.

Just so you know, I took the liberty of creating a discount code for your listeners. I don't know if that's okay.

Oh, yeah, beautiful. Please share that with us.

Absolutely.

We'll put it in the show notes too. Yeah.

If people use Love Shack 20, they'll get 20% off their order. So I just wanted to make sure that you guys have that. Like, we want people to use this. Everyone at the company uses it ourselves, like, obviously. And so we, we want this to be out there in the world. People, people love.

Thank you, George.

If I may to kind of put it as a kind of a bookend to it. Be on the receiving end. You know what? This. So Marty talked about what Tom and Stace talked about what Brooklyn talked about, and then George talked about in terms of it just, it is as simple. I didn't do it. But now I've heard it enough just to tell you what it's like to being on the rece. Like, it is just. It is a gift that the person will have never received for whatever the occasion is. If you're a hundred years old, if you're a new parent, if for somebody like me, on the celebration of a milestone birthday, but also somebody who's living with an interesting thing that he didn't choose, which makes life really difficult at times. And then this is like truth with a capital T. I know these people, these people are not just saying this to be nice. And I. What I would contend is no one's going to call up and make whatever the investment is, which is going to be ridiculous. The be cheap compared to what you're going to get. No one's going to spend the money to say things just to be nice. So that ain't going to happen. There is nobody that. That is that altruistic to do it because. Because of the inertia of life. So you got to realize that this is authentic, authentic, authentic, authentic. And so on the receiving end of somebody, it is going to make an enormous difference that you cannot even quantify, regardless of what inspired you to do it. Whatever it is doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be in a situation like me, not that's one possibility. But whenever the person on the receiving end, whatever the occasion is, it is going to make an impact. I know this from personal experience within the realm of how people need to be acknowledged. It will make an impact that you cannot even quantify. You can't even get your head around it. You got to trust me. This is my lane. I go around the world doing this. It will make an impact. Please, for the love of all things that are good in the world, please call this wonderful human being and take the time to do it.

It's funny what I'll say. Like, the version I hear about that more often is folks older than you, right? Your parents, generation prob.

Who.

Folks get lonely, especially later in life, right? And we. The version that I hear more often than what you just expressed is a grandmother might say, oh, who me? I didn't have an interesting life. You don't want to hear from me. And like, no, no, somebody is paying us to talk to you. Like, they want to hear from you.

Believe me, that's a really good point.

And it. You don't have to have. You don't have to have been like Amelia Earhart to like justify being on. You know, you just have to Talk about your experience, right? And people feel seen, they feel valued. They feel like just the actual of giving it. Anyway, I just wanted to. That's the version I hear more often than what you express, which very, you know, very, very obviously everyone has their own experience. But.

No, no. And I think. And I think. Because I think not only is the person on the receiving end potentially diminishing who they are, the person on the giving end diminishes. What could they contribute? It could be. And just to give credit where credit is due in terms of this, the foundation of my work is connection. The seen heard in value comes from the great Brene Brown. So the quote is. I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard and valued, when they can give and rece judgment and they derive strength and sustenance from the relationship. That's what you do. It is because you're that grandma who's. No, I just. I was a grandma. I raised my kids. I stayed at home. Yeah, but grandma, your memory of me doing something that I totally forgot that had an impact on you. I need to hear that. I need to know that I matter to you. Doesn't matter what it is. I need to matter. So I totally get what you're saying, brother.

One of my favorites is. Yeah, one of my favorites is that we did a young woman with her grandmother talking about the Italian Christmas cookies they bake every.

Every year.

And so they have this very special recipe. The grandmother was born in Italy. And, you know, this is a tradition that. So I. I tend to think about, like these things, like recipes that are like, so losable.

There's no traditions that are.

So, like, is the recipe what's important or like the experience of like every December make, you know, getting the marzipan and like, you know, that's. Anyway, you guys get what I'm saying.

You mentioned NPR, so I know Dave, I say, and StoryCorps, it's like you've taken StoryCorps and you've taken it, like you've given it like the best steroid of all time and then you've put it to a place of technology to make it accessible. So we don't need to be sitting with Dave. I say we could be in the situations because you look, if you've not listened to StoryCorps, StoryCorps is that sort of thing. But now you've made it accessible to everybody.

Yeah, it's incredible. It's absolutely incredible. So, George, share with us where we point people to. On your side of things. So that they can take advantage of that wonderful discount account that you offered. Thank you so much.

No, absolutely. Our landing page is heyartifact.com so hey artifact.com H E Y and the code for your listeners is love shack20. So love shack20. And yeah, we just really get a thrill out of serving families like yours. We meet people, they're. They're strangers and then they end up spilling their guts to one of our interviewers. And it's very common for people to come in and say I just had the most amazing conversation with this person in Rhode island, island or you know, Wyoming or wherever. And it's just like everyone's life, man. That's what drives us.

So our wonderful stories, right? Oh my gosh, our wonderful stories. And Woody, how about you share with us where people can find you and connect more with you and the work that you do as well.

Probably easiest is, is if you just google me. David Woods Bartley. So there's contact information I'm here to to I love to tell my story. As I say, I take people in my journey from mental illness to mental wellness with the platform. The connection creates hope. Hope is a weapon happen and hope saves lives. So I love to work through a lot with the military, which is great. Our eldest brother served for 42 years. They call him a mustang because he enlisted and went to a two star general. I also work with schools because our children are suffering terribly. And also in the business world just to try to give a different perspective on this thing called suicide. I don't use PowerPoints, I don't use data, I tell stories. So if you google David Woods Bartley and you have an interest, I would love to come and I give presentations and training in any way, shape or form.

It's David woodsbartly.com huh, forgot about that.

So anyway, I think we could do this a lot more often than just once every once in a while with this group of. This is wonderful.

So I'm going to wrap this conversation up with a quote from George. I had shared with him that I was going to quote him on the front side. He has no idea what I'm going to say. But I think this is a wonderful summary to our conversation today. What we've come to realize is that each of us harbors a deep interest in and an affection for the people in our lives. But that our lives contain precious few moments in which it feels natural. Natural to let those people know how they make us feel. That's what we do. And that is just incredible. And we can do it in the small moments and the big moments.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Good copy, brother. Good job, George.

You knocked it out of the park.

Wow.

And hey, everything we've talked about is going to be in the show notes for this podcast as we say goodbye. I would say to you, if you need help and support. Support. If you're struggling right now in your relationships, your mental health, your. Your struggling, don't wait. We are here. We want to help you. We want to cheer you on, we want to support you. And sooner is always better than later. So you can find us at stacybartly.com davidwoodsbartly.com and hey, artifacts.com and don't forget to pick up your discount.

And we're gonna let these two gentlemen go and we're gonna come back for some follow the fun and some can you feel it.

But absolutely. Any final words? Anybody?

Guys, I've just really enjoyed hanging out in the love shack.

Thank you for this. We're so glad I happen to. To adore you three so it never gets old. And George, what a. What an honor. And I hope life continues to keep us connected. And thanks for what you're doing, buddy. It's just really, really, really, really great.

Hey, and you come on over here to Northern California, George. And guess what we're going to do? We're going to have an acknowledgment ceremony around the city table.

Okay. All right.

Doesn't have to be for your birthday. We'll just do it any old time.

Just because you got that friend in San Francisco. So we're only a couple hours east of there.

Thank you so much. Such a pleasure. Well, it's time for a little bit of follow the fun. Today. I'm going to call it Hot Flash. And then I'm going to call it Hot Flash, because here's what I'm going to invite you to to do. When your lover is finished showering and you hear the water stop, emerge with a warm towel fresh from the dryer and wrap it around them as you then give them a very big impassioned kiss right on the lips. And then you just walk out of the room.

I can say that you've never done that to me. I know.

I was hoping you would do it for me.

Who goes first? We say give first. Give fast.

Yeah.

All right, I will. Oh, and then maybe we're going to report back. You know, know we need to hold ourselves accountable. I will. I will do this. And we'll report back in a very near episode. Stacy can just, like we did with George and Woody. We can share the experience of the giver and the receiver.

Yeah, I love that idea. Well, here's the thing. I also want you to see, dear listener, how easy it is to create a little bit of novelty and fun in your life. Like, how many seconds would that take? Less than a minute. You know, the thought, pulling it out of the dryer. You only got to spin it for 30 seconds.

I'm thinking of a friend who. Who often shared that his special someone, his wife, would do that.

And I think, no way.

And he said, oh, it's wonderful. A warm towel. When I.

And don't forget the kiss.

Oh, yes.

Don't forget the kiss.

Okay.

And then you don't have to say anything or do anything else. Just walk out of the room, and you're gonna leave him in a place of, like, wow, what just happened? I think.

And you'll be okay with a warm towel, even though it's very warm outside here in Northern California right now?

Me?

Yes. Yeah. You love warm.

Oh, come on. Come on.

All right.

Hey. Our song for today, for can you.

Feel moment, is unbelievable. The video, I would impassionly ask you, request you to watch it. It is very powerful. Stacy had me watch it before we started our recording.

Yes. Timothy Bloom till the end of time unbelievable. Talks about us creating a relationship that leaves a legacy behind. So it was perfect for our episode today. But it also talks about the power of love that we all crave and long for. So I really encourage you to check it. And for those of you who are maybe new and this is the first time you're listening to us here in the love shack, I want you to know that each and every week, we choose a theme song for each episode. Why? Because we want you to feel your experience of being inside of the love shack, as well as some of the wonderful, logical takeaways that we've shared with you here today. So you can check out this song. Yes. You can search it up on YouTube by just. By going Timothy Bloom till the end of time. You can also go to our website. You can check it out there. We also have a playlist inside of Spotify love shack live playlist. You can catch out this song along with our collection there, and you can just take a wonderful trip down feeling lane, I suppose.

Yeah. I say sometimes challenge yourself to listen to the song first and then hopefully enjoy and appreciate the actual episode that might be especially for this one. Could be a different experience. This was a really fun episode. This is one we've been waiting to record for a while.

Yeah, it's. It's great. So thanks so much for being here with us inside of the Love Shack today. And if by chance you're in a place you you need some help and support, please don't wait. Most couples simply wait too long for their emotional needs and desires to get met to make progress in their relationship. Don't let that be you. It's always better to get help sooner rather than later. And also, if you've liked this conversation inside the Love Shack, we invite you to like, comment and subscribe for more transformative relationship advice. We look forward to seeing you next time right here inside a love shack. Bye bye for now.

All right, it's time to leave the Love Shack. But before we part ways, we want you to know our door is always open and we'll leave the porch light on, ready to welcome you back whenever you need a dose of relationship wisdom. For more resources and tools, Visit us at loveshacklive.com to dive deeper into the topics we've explored and find additional support for your relationship journey. Stay connected by subscribing Subscribing to our Podcast thank you for being part of our Love Shack Live community.