Day 5 - The Missing Key to Manifestation

Hello. Welcome to day 5 of the missing key to manifestation. I have the key, and the missing key is all 4 parts together of compassion, forgiveness, gratitude, and love. So, as I've said before, I think that we have nailed the gratitude thing. Like everything is gratitude, gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. Be grateful for where you are. Be grateful for what you have. Like, and I'm not trying to brush over it. It's all very relevant, but I think there is a gazillion resources out there about gratitude. And the missing key, I think, is that we're forgetting the front end of the co— of the conversation. And that is, yes, I can be grateful, but that doesn't like detract from my emotions that I'm feeling right now, or as we've been talking, back in a certain situation, or back when we were little. Like, they are the emotions that we have not been honoring. And I think putting all 4 together, that's what makes the missing key. It's like one of those antique skeleton keys that you need 4 pieces, you know, when 4 people have each piece and you all have to come together to open The lock. And what does the lock reveal? The lock reveals you. The lock opens to you with all parts integrated. So yesterday we opened the can of worms on the whole body image and how we feel about our bodies and how we have been programmed for so long to link our worth to how we look. So I like to, um, like give a visual. I'm very visual, so I love to give things visual representations. So in the Living from Your Heart Challenge, I like to just, to just, um, describe it as like a filing cabinet. Your brain has this filing cabinet, and every time someone said something to you that links to a I am not enough because my body doesn't look right. Or if I rest, I'm lazy, therefore I'm not enough. If I'm not productive, I'm not worthy. If I'm, um, selfish, I'm not worthy. Like all of those labels, I suppose you would call it, that we link to then being not worthy, not being whole, like not feeling whole in our core. Um, so I call them unaligned belief systems, or, um, unaligned or outdated, outdated belief systems, which means you picked it up when you were wrong. Now when you have a look at it, does— is this true to me? Is this true to this divine, beautiful, amazing being that I am? If I am lazy, does that mean I'm not a divine, beautiful, amazing Human or soul? Well, really, we are a soul in a human body. Like, the human body is giving us this experience of life. And I really do bang on about that in the Living from Your Heart Challenge, because trying to understand why we're here is a big one, which we do cover in that challenge. And I just pause then because I'm like Am I going to go back into that here, or am I going to make you go to the Living from Your Heart? Do you know what? I'm going to give you the Cliff Notes, and it's really simple. I'm going to use the $10 million example, which is if someone offered you $10 million today, but the condition on it was that you didn't get to wake up tomorrow. So you get $10 million and you have a fabulous afternoon, but at the end of The day the money's gone. You can't give it to anyone. You can't short-circuit the deal. You can't invest it for someone. You can't give it to your children. You can't give it to your parents. You can't give it to your family. It's gone, and you don't get to wake up tomorrow. And I think most people would say, oh gosh, no, I don't want $10 million. And I apologize if I've already used this example on this, in this Missing Key Challenge, but it's just such a good example of I don't want $10 million. I want to wake up tomorrow. If the clause is that finite— oh, sorry, excuse me. Um, if the clause is that finite and it means I don't get to wake up tomorrow, no, I choose life. I'm not done yet. Like, I want to see my kids graduate. I want to see my daughter's flag games next week. Like, I don't want $10 million to not wake up tomorrow. The afternoon's just not worth it. So my point being is that we came here into these bodies to experience life as a human. And in the Living from Your Heart Challenge, I use the Nicolas Cage in City of Angels reference. I use that a lot because I think it's such a good representation of being a human. And he— so if you don't know the movie, I recommend going to, going to watch it immediately. And he's an angel and he's fallen in love with Meg Ryan, who is a nurse— not a nurse, she's a doctor. She's a doctor, and somehow she just fascinates him, and he follows her around. He shows himself to her, which I don't think they're supposed to do, but he does anyway. Anyway, then long story short, he meets another angel who has actually crossed over into the human form And the angel tells him, oh yeah, you've got free choice. You don't think that he— like, the humans have free will but we don't have free will? You have free will, but if you cross over and choose to be a human, you will lose all your angel qualities, which is like they're bilingual, they're multilingual, they can speak any language, nothing hurts them, they can travel at the speed of thought. Like, all of those things you lose. And he is so infatuated with Meg Ryan and he's like, nah, I'll give all that up to come down and be a human. And when he ascends to become a human— well, not— he descends to become a human, he like, for the first time in his life, he felt like he crashes down and he's like hurt. Like he's never felt pain, he's never felt— he's never had an injury because in the energetic world everything is energy. There's no like human pain receptors, there's no, um, Like they don't feel like humans do. So that's why he is like experiencing life through this, through this lens. And he doesn't forget who he is. He still knows he was an angel. But so he's, um, like tasting a pear for the first time. He's like, like the sweet and the juicy and the crunchy and the grainy and the cool taste of a pear. He's never tasted a pear. And talk about digressing, but I, um, um, I really wanted to bring that home because we came here to do the same thing. We came here to taste the pear. We came here to feel the sunshine on our shoulders. Like, we came here to like dive into the ocean waves. And that's something the angels always do. They, they, um, meet on the, um, beach every morning and they sing this beautiful music, like this angelic Well, I don't know if they're singing it or it's just— is there, um, which only they can hear. But Nicolas Cage, one of the things he does is he comes and he goes body surfing in the water in front of them all, because that's something that they can't feel. They can't experience body surfing, the thrill of coming down a wave. They can't experience like getting smashed by a wave. They can't experience floating in the water looking up at the sky. Like, all of those experiences is why we came here. And now I can't even remember why I started talking about that. Talk about digression. Okay, anyway, point being, we are here to experience all the things, but over time we've added on all these layers and conditioning and belief systems that have made like we've forgotten that we are that divine soul underneath it all. So I call that the filing cabinet where we've stored them over all the years. Every time someone said something that's made you feel I'm not enough, into the filing cabinet we go. So yesterday we covered body image, and I'll leave it there because we can cover body image probably for a year and we still won't get through it all. So just getting comfy, um, like that. Like, I think the body image wounding is so big, and it's interesting because when I was digging into with scanties, like, the why But why do people feel so bad about their bodies? One big thing that came up for me, I said, I thought, and this is just my theory, is a body is something we can see. Like, we look at it in the mirror, we get dressed every morning, we like brush our teeth, we wash our face, we put makeup on or don't put makeup on, whatever it is, we see our 3D bodies all the time. So if we don't feel worthy, it's very easy to point the finger at the 3D physical representation of what you can see. Like, if I don't feel worthy because I'm not being productive or I'm not lazy, like, I can't point to lazy on the couch. Like, like, I can't point to unproductive. Like, it's— do you know what I mean? It's It's not a physical representation that I can blame. Like, I could— do you see what I mean? Like, I can't like, oh, there's your lazy over there. Oh, there, your lazy's not looking too good today. Because we see our bodies, but I'm not seeing my lazy. Well, I might like, oh, you didn't answer that email, or you haven't called that person you were supposed to call and have been supposed to call for quite a while. This is a true story. Um, the time zones keep getting off, and I seriously, by the time it gets to the time zone, I'm just like, I can't be bothered having that conversation because it's a difficult conversation. Like, I'm just going to push that aside. So that is me being a bit lazy and putting off and, um, being unproductive because I can't be bothered. But I'm not sort of like treating it as badly as we do with our bodies. So I told you we weren't going to talk about bodies, but I wanted to try and differentiate between why our bodies cop so much flak. And it's because we see them all the time. Like, I don't walk in the mirror and go, oh, there's Lazy. Lazy, what are you doing in there? Do you know what I mean? Like, I, I walk in the mirror and I see my body. So that's why we cop so much flak. That's why we're so critical of our bodies, because it's, it's sort of like a, a funnel. Like, is that the right word? A funnel? Like a gateway into all our not enoughness that we can physically blame. So whilst we might feel lazy or greedy, how often do you probably link those together? Oh, you are so lazy. You didn't go to the gym, so now you are fat. See, you've linked it to the physical thing you can see. Oh, you're so greedy, you ate all that ice cream and now you're fat. Like you, you, you blaming it. We don't just go, oh, you are so greedy, you ate all that ice cream. Because eating all the ice cream and being greedy on its own doesn't actually matter. It's, we're linking it to the physical causation of that action. Wow, okay, there we go. I wasn't expecting that to come out, but that's the beauty of recording live. Like, all sorts of amazing things and thought processes come out. But do you see what I mean? Like, greedy, lazy, um, selfish. What do we link selfish to? Oh, you're so selfish. Selfish is just wanting what you want, really. Selfish is being like— but we're all taught, don't be selfish, you've got to share. No, you're like a little kid. No, I don't want to share my toys. No thank you. They haven't had all these layers of conditioning on them yet. It's like, don't be selfish, share your toys. And they're like, I don't want to, I really don't want to. I want— these are my toys, I'm playing with them. And we get conditioned and conditioned and conditioned. You share, you don't be selfish, you be good, don't be selfish. So And we jam them into the file. Oh, you're being so selfish, you didn't let me do XYZ. Into the file, into the file. So that's why I think this process is going back and just offering compassion and forgiveness to all those parts of us. Like, I am so sorry, little toddler me, that somebody made you share your toys when you didn't want to. I am so sorry that made you feel upset and that your needs weren't being heard. Because the toddler's saying, I don't want to share my toys, and the adult's saying, yes you do, off you go, share your toys. And like, I know I'm overdramatizing this because like we do have to live in a society, so there are some— you need to learn some I don't even want to call them rules, but some social behaviors maybe. And I don't know, I could be completely contradicting myself, but my point is 2 things can be true. Like, you can feel upset and angry that they took your toys away from you when you didn't want to give them away, and you can also play nicely with your friends. So It's like, do you see what I mean? Like, it's the, it's the suck it up portion of it that we haven't been honoring. And I think, well, I don't know, I'm Australian and we have such a suck it up culture. Like, get on with it, toughen up, like suck it up, just get it done. So I feel like as a race we have a lot of compassion and forgiveness that is owed to younger versions of ourselves because they were taught from such a young age that you just toughen up and get on with it. Like, like, stop your whinging. Like, grow up. And so we've been taught for so long to shove down these emotions that until recently I didn't even realize 2 things could be true at once. Like, I didn't even realize that Well, really, until I did the Living in Your Heart Challenge, where I learned from my digging that just because I have selfish tendencies, the selfish tendencies aren't wrong. We need selfish tendencies. We need lazy tendencies. We need angry tendencies. We need greedy tendencies. We actually need all of them because all those character traits are actually giving us a gift. We've just been taught the opposite. We've been taught that they're bad and they make you not a good human, and you're, you're not good enough if you're greedy, greedy and selfish and lazy. But what about if Lazy Susie Who needed a rest, who was exhausted. What if by having that rest, it's helping me that I can either focus more that afternoon, or maybe it's helping me to not get sick, or maybe it's protecting me from burnout, or like, do you know what I mean? Like, these traits we've been taught are bad. Have actually been looking out for us. Like, selfish, selfish Susie is maybe just standing up for herself because people-pleasing Susie has been running the show for too long. So selfish Susie's like, hello, over here, over here. We, we kind of do want that. We don't want to give that away to them even though we said we would because we didn't want to rock the boat and And, and keep everything smooth and happy. But we, we actually, we do want that. It's just that People Pleaser Susie has been so loud with her foghorn. It's like, this is how we act, this is how we behave. Like, she's got a whole marching band. And so Little Selfish Susie has been jammed down so far that she doesn't get a word in. And so They're the parts of us that we're trying to reintegrate. Like, I am so sorry that you felt like you had to give away something that you wanted because they were making you feel bad for wanting to keep it, which is essentially being selfish. Like, I am so sorry that they made you share that when really you wanted it for yourself. Like, and this can be like as children, but it can also be as adults as well. Like, you know when you go to a party and you take a really nice bottle of wine and then someone turns up and they've got some piece of crap that who knows where, bargain bin they found it in, and then they hand it over, they drink all of your good wine, and then you're left looking at their piece of crap going, oh, am I supposed to drink this now? Like, that's where little selfish Susie— do you know what I mean though? Like, I, I'm dramatizing that, but it's like, it happens now as well. You're like, I bought that bottle of wine because I really wanted to drink it. Like, I didn't want to drink your wine. If I'd wanted to drink that wine, I would have brought that wine. So I'm like, look, I'm going off with my stories again. And oh my God, it's 19 minutes already. You must be going, can she get to the point? Anyway, the point is we're digging into where do these stories come from and are they true? And if they aren't true, which part of us holds that wounding that made us think they were true? So I am so sorry that you had to share your beautiful bottle of wine with the person that didn't have any respect for your— the wine that you brought, or had complete respect for it and knew exactly what they were doing. I'm sorry that after they drank all your wine, you had no more wine to drink. Like, I am so sorry. Thank you. No, we haven't done— we've done, I forgive you. I forgive you for feeling annoyed about that. Like, I forgive you for feeling annoyed and irritated about that. And I'm, I'm just checking now, am I forgiving me for being annoyed and irritated? I'm so sorry they drank your wine. So sorry. I'm so sorry you had to share when you didn't want to. I suppose if we want to take it back To the toddler reference, essentially it's— I, that's, you know, I was saying let's bring in the same emotions. It's like, I'm so sorry you had to share your wine. I'm so sorry you had to share your toys when you were 2. I'm so sorry you had to share your parents when your other siblings were born. Like, these wounds can come from so many different angles, but they're all around the same thing. It's like, Selfish Susie wants her say. Selfish Susie wants to be like hugged and said, yes, you were right. You did want those things. And you are, and you're lovable because you wanted them. You were trying to protect Susie in that instance because it's what she actually really wanted. She did want her parents all to herself. She did want the toys all to herself. And she did want the wine. Well, she probably didn't want the wine all to herself, but she certainly didn't want it to be gone like that. Do you know what I mean? Um, so sorry, I did digress. So I'm so sorry that you had to share when you didn't want to. Um, I'm working out the— I forgive you. Okay, this is it. I forgive you for thinking that not wanting to share made you a bad person. Boom, that's it. I forgive you for linking not wanting to share, i.e., being selfish, a bit selfish we'll call it, that's dramatic, but for not wanting to share and linking that to it making you feel bad about yourself. Oh, I should be the good person, I should just share the wine like I should just share my toys, etc. Do you see what I mean? Like linking it to forgiving, forgiving the part of you that that situation made them feel bad about themselves. Like, I forgive you for thinking that that made you less than, like, less than worthy. Like you are, like we are validating their emotions. Like validating, I'm so sorry. We're validating it. It's like, yes, your parents were trying to teach you to become an agreeable, social, acceptable person in, in society, but in that it was linked. Like, you internally linked that if I don't share, I'm a bad person. So we are forgiving ourselves for making the action of not sharing, linking that to us being not worthy, i.e., a bad person and not conforming. And yeah, we'll get kicked out of the tribe, caveman time, and then we'll be all alone and die. So I am grateful. The gratitude around— well, I am grateful that you actually do have a big heart and did share. I don't even know if that's right. See, I'm trying to figure out like the, the structure. I am grateful. If I'm forgiving, I am so sorry that you had to share and you didn't want to. And then I forgive you because The fact that you didn't want to share made you feel bad about yourself, made you feel like you were less than, that you were not a good person. The gratitude around this particular example Hmm, because I don't want to trivialize it. Like, and this part's really important because we just linked forgiveness for thinking you're a bad person if you don't share. So it feels unnatural to now link sharing, like being grateful to you or thanking you for— maybe that's it. Thank you for sharing even though you didn't want to. We got there. We got there in the end. Thank you for sharing even though you didn't want to. And I love you. Because you have a beautiful open heart that does share even if they don't want to. Is that right? Thank you for sharing even though you didn't want to. Thank— I'm going to be— I'll be thinking about this tonight. Anyway, I love you because you did share. You shared your toys, you shared your wine, you shared your parents when you had siblings. Like We share all the time. It is a part of being human. And I think probably what I'm trying— like, people share all the time and that there is no emotional trigger. Like, you can share all the time and there's no emotional trigger. But I'm just talking about those little times when you actually just might not want to, but the feeling linked to that, that's like, I really don't want to, but, uh, Then I'm a bad person if I don't, and what does that make me? Maybe the thank you is maybe you stand up and say, actually, sorry, no, that's um that's saved over here for someone else and me. We're sharing that bottle. Um, but thank you. I don't know. Thank you. Maybe we're gonna start. I don't know. I actually don't know. I'm gonna think about that. I love you for sharing when you didn't want to. But see, that's reinforcing doing something because it— to fit in. I don't know. Look, I'll be thinking about this overnight. You have a think about it and let me know in the comments what you think. Okay, we're going to bed with this unresolved, and I've got a very long flag game ahead of me. So they normally go for like an hour and a half, so I will be thinking whilst I'm watching those girls run around on that field. About how to resolve this. Don't worry, I'll probably have 43, 43, um, different approaches tomorrow, which I will surely let you know. So anyway, I turned the lights on today, so because it was getting dusk and I didn't want to get alien face like I had the other day. So this is a bit better lighting, not like so zoomed in. Anyway, I love you lots. I will be back tomorrow with My revelations on the framework around this topic, like the selfishness and not being selfish, and what are we grateful for and what are we loving ourselves for. I've gotta figure that one out. Okay, I love you lots. See you tomorrow with my ponderings. Bye. Bye.