I think I figured out how to surrender!!

Hello, welcome to Susie Unshaked, and this is post our 31-day challenge. If you haven't done the 31-day challenge, it's free. I highly recommend it. Um, okay, so I am going to really— do you know when I think it changed? I know, do you know when I think everything changed? Like, you need to do the 31-day challenge to like Peel back all the layers. Like, we have peeled back so many layers of the onion that you're probably not going to know what we're talking about here. Or you might know what we're talking about here because you're at our frequency already and we've already attracted you. Or you have no idea what we're talking about and you've clicked off already. So in which case, welcome to the people that stayed. If you've stayed to 45 seconds of me talking about absolutely nothing, then you're probably supposed to be here. Anyway, I was having a talk with my dear friend Anna yesterday And she was, um, she, she— we've been talking about this, um, like the concept of like embracing the part of us that feels scared and that feels like that has doubt and that like all those parts of ourselves that we have our entire lives being told like Suck it up, be brave, you can do this. Like all the bravado, all of that. We've been looking at who, what version of you gets trampled on, gets climbed up over the top of in order for the brave version and the, and the trusting version and the we can do it version and the we've got this version. Like, we've been really looking at those The scared version and the doubting version and the terrified version, because I, I like, I really think it's the key. I think it's the key. And do you know what I just like, I had this aha moment. I was driving today. I think in the acceptance of the version of ourself that is scared, That is doubtful, that is like frightened, that is worried that it won't work. Like, in the acceptance of that, I feel like that is the act of surrender. Like, that is like— I think that's the taking the hands off the wheel part. Because we were talking about how to accept in that terrified part of ourselves. And I was joking around with Anna because, um, because like our instinct, like our primal instinct is like we need to be accepted to be a part of the herd. Because if we get separated from the herd, we can't survive by ourselves. Like, we— like, basically, if you're not accepted, you get separated from the herd and you die. So we, we laugh because we simplify everything down to the fact that, well, you'll get separated out, you'll be rejected, by the herd and then you're gonna die. So, which it is, it's actually how we're programmed. We don't feel safe unless we're accepted by the herd. Like, it's, it's, it's how we've been programmed, like, in our, like, primal sense. Like caveman, like caveman can't survive by themselves. Like, they have to be in the tribe. So it's like in our DNA, this, um, yeah, in our DNA as a human That to be accepted equals survival. And so we were laughing, and, um, we were laughing because it was— she was, um, lamenting the fact she hasn't been back swimming since she's been on her big trip. And I— and she— and I said, okay, so what? Like, she said, I'm accepting the terrified version of myself because I haven't been back in the pool. And I knew where she was going with it, but I was like, okay, I'll just have a little bit of fun here and say, okay, so So, um, what is the real fear about not getting into the pool? And it was funny because she was like, that I'll become a— this was her exact words. I'm going to tell you them because I think they're actually so funny, because this is what we think as humans. Like, this is what goes through it. Like, this is— if you speak out the irrational fear, like, you'll see how crazy it is. That's what I'm going to tell you what they are. It was that I'm going to become a complacent fatty and lie in bed drinking cappuccinos instead of getting up and going to the pool. So we— I just like said, like, we had to laugh. Like, you have to laugh. Like, only a human mind could dream up that her— when she's not well, by the way, like, like, she's actually not swimming for a reason because she's not feeling well and she's trying to get better. And when she did go swimming, she lost her voice. And so like, it doesn't make logical sense for her to go swimming, and yet her brain has twisted it in. And then so I laughed along. So complacent fatty that's going to drink cappuccinos in bed instead of going to exercise. And I laughed and I said, so basically you'll, you'll then you'll be undesirable, so you'll be rejected from the herd and then you die. And she just laughed and went, I know, it's ridiculous. And, um, and I said, um, okay, how about if I— and this was actually really interesting because I said to her, I'm gonna give you a little bit of— I'm gonna tell you what the future holds. And I said, that doesn't happen. And what really surprised me was she said, oh my God, I really needed to hear that. And I was like, wow, we're funny as humans, aren't we? And that's when I was like, it's, it's letting go of the control. Like, surrendering means like, I am going to take my hands off the wheel and I am going to let, like, let go. Just realized I'm not in park, so that's That's good. I need to park the car. My hands are off the wheel, so if we're not in park, that could be a disaster. But the acceptance of the scared version and the terrified version, I think, is actually like the acceptance of failure. And that even if you fail— and I'm not sure if I'm saying this right— but the version of us that's got to be brave, that's gotta like suck it up and get on with it, that's gotta like figure it out, like all that fixing and like that's all the control, like that's the trying to control the situation by jumping in front of it and, and fixing and figuring it out and All of those like 3D, like I'm gonna control it so I don't fail it, so I don't fail at it, because failure equals kicked out of the herd and then you die. So in the ability to accept the terrified version, like, like I'll remember that feeling when I did this, like when I was trusting my I was trusting what my heart wanted, and my human was like, it's scary, it's scary, I can't do it, I can't do it. And I remember just going, I love you. Like, yes, it is scary, and I see you scared me. I see you scared me. Like, I acknowledge that you're there. And just breathing into that and just seeing, instead of trying to like Band-Aid over with the, it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay. Like, it's gonna— like that trust, trust, dude, dude, dude, go, go, go, go. And just to just sit back and just breathe, and it's okay to be scared. It's okay to be scared. Anyway, I digress. But I think— I don't really digress. I think it's the key. To taking your hands off the wheel and just surrendering, you have to accept the part of your human that is scared to surrender. I think that's the point. You have to accept in the part of your human which is petrified of taking our hands off the wheel and surrendering. That, that's the key. Anyway, so give me comments on what you think about that. And the next thing I want to talk about is actually the very sad, sad passing of, um, Dawson off Dawson's Creek, James Van Der Beek, um, from cancer. And but They've— he, before he left this world, he managed to record some amazing videos, and I've only seen a couple of them, but one really, like, one was— it was about our identity. And he said, when I was an actor, like, I sort of— that was my identity, you know. There wasn't a great identity. He didn't really align with it that well. And he said, but then I became a husband. He was like, oh my God, I love— like, that identity I could align with more. I could support my wife, I could be there for her. Like, that gave me a bit more of a sense of purpose, a sense of like meaning, life meaning. And then he said, and then becoming a father, he was like, well, that was even better than being a husband because you had these children that I was caretaker to. And like, it gave me a real sense of purpose. And I was like caretaker to the earth and looking after the plants and looking after my patch of dirt sort of thing. And then he said, and then I got cancer and I was away from my family getting treatment, so I couldn't identify with helping my wife. I couldn't identify with being there for my children. I couldn't even identify with keeping the land in, like, because I was too weak to cut, to prune the trees when I needed to prune the trees, and the season went past and I missed the pruning. And so he said cancer stripped all of those identities. Away from him because he was no longer able to perform the roles, the identities required. And I, I don't know when I spoke about this in the challenge, but it's such a strong, like, It's not really an activity, it's more like a— what is it? Process. Process is what I'll call it. A process to just— if you're not a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, like peel off all those layers. If you're not like your job, if like, if you're not your achievements. Like, when you peel away all of the things that we identify with, that we think make us who we are, like, peel them all away. And I remember the very first time I did this, and I did it actually at a women's retreat, and it was a beautiful process. We did it like, um, Inanna. So Inanna is the— I think she's like the goddess of the Above, above ground, like not underground, not the underworld. She's the goddess of not the underworld, the above world. I don't know if it's the heavens or what it is, but she's the goddess of above, the above world. And I think maybe her sister Persephone is, is down in the underworld, and I think she might be going to rescue her sister. Anyway, I digress, like I'm fluffing. The point being that Inanna was going to the underworld to see her sister. I don't know if she was trying to rescue her, if she was visiting her. Anyway, you cannot pass into the underworld with any of your above world, like, titles, possessions, jewels, crowns. Like, she had to strip naked. And even, like, the physicality was stripped naked, but the titles were stripped naked. Stripped, and everything was stripped. So then she was just, in essence, uh, a body going down into the underworld. And I remember we, we did this, and there were— I think there was chanting and there was drums, and we put our ears onto the earth. Like, we put our ears down onto the earth, and it— like, this was a proper process we were being led through. And it was sort of like to talk to the earth, talk to Inanna, like, who are we? Like, who am I if I strip off all of their titles and all of the robes and jewels and labels? And like, who are you when you strip all of those away? And it's really interesting because we went around in a circle afterwards, and a lot of people, they were confused by the— they were confused by the process and the task. Because they were still identifying with the labels. It's really hard to— it's really hard to peel them off. Like mother, sister, friend. Like you might— like you might be, um, like any, any label, anything that you think defines you. When, when you don't have that, who are you? And that's what James Van Der Beek Dawson. He was like, when you're sitting there sick as anything in this can riddled with cancer, like in treatment, you're weak. Your body is like frail. Like the this is the big question. Like you your mortality. You're staring your mortality in the face. So who are you? And this is this is like something I want you all to ask yourselves. Like this is deep. Like as Max, my darling son, would always go like whatever we're talking about. He's like mom. It's not that deep. This is deep. This is deep, like, to the core of your essence. Who are you? And like, I don't know. Oh, I— sorry, the point I was just— why I said— why I said I don't know is it's funny that we're talking about this. Maybe I needed to say it in another way. Maybe there's someone that's listening to this that hasn't done the challenge, because our 31-day challenge really dug into that question. Who are we? Who are we? Maybe this is a video— this is now a pre to the course, because if you do the course, I think we've really dug— like, we have— we dug up— we've dug up all this stuff. We've peeled all those onion layers off to really figure out like who we are, what our purpose is, why we are here. So it's interesting actually. I digress, and I'm really not going to get into this too much because I actually don't have enough of the— I don't know if you call it like the theology to properly explain it, but I've noticed a few big, um, thought leaders— would you call them thought leaders— lately that are butting heads in the, in the Instagram. That's probably in the YouTube, in the YouTube too. In the Instagram, I just watched one. I watched a, um, just a brief clip and I suppose at the moment, like, this is a timeless, like, video because there is no time. We know that. But at the moment, the world is being— it's being shaken up a little bit. It is being like the foundations are like— we're having like a shake-up, I would call it. A big shake-up. Like a— an earthquake, but of the I don't know what you would call it, like an earthquake within the structure of our society. There we go, look at that. The foundations of us as a society, we are having some mega quakes and things are coming up and coming out. And so I think we're going to see a lot more of these thought leaders. I'm not going to get into it too much. But at each other's throats. And what I found was interesting is like this one was like sort of attacking the other, and he refused to— he sort of had him by the jugular and was like stuck on one point, and he refused to take a bigger step backwards. You know, I've been saying we've got to zoom out and see the perspective as a whole. And you can't just like— if you're like got some one thing under the microscope, you can't see the full picture, and that we need to zoom out. It was interesting. So I just think what's happening is going to be very interesting over the next while. Yeah, a foundational, a societal— we're having societal foundational earthquakes. Okay, I'm really blabbing here. It's a beautiful day. Like, I don't know, tell me what you think. Anyway, be here, be happy. I don't know, I don't know what I'm even talking about now. I've gone a bit nuts today. Anyway, just breathe. Oh, I never actually told you the end of the James van der Beek, about what he— when he pulled all his labels off, he realized he was worthy of love from God, and that if he was worthy of God's love, then he was worthy of his own love. And that is what our 31-day challenge obviously uncovers is that, well, we are God's essence. We are the same energy and like creation. Like, we are God's creation. We are God's essence. And if we are that, then it's nearly comical we don't think we're enough. Which is why I was laughing at Anna with her cappuccino in bed and the, and the, um, and that, that she That she wasn't enough if she wasn't out there flogging herself in the pool, that she couldn't be enough just lying in bed. Well, she could have 50 cappuccinos in bed and she's still going to be enough, and still her, her like foreboding prediction is not going to come true. Because do you know what? She might be tired. Have cappuccino in bed 5 mornings in a row and eventually you're not going to be tired. She'd bounce off and do something else. So You do have to listen to your bodies as well. Like, if they're tired— and I'm terrible at this because it was never like— I was a doer. You don't rest. What is this resting business? You don't rest. You just keep going and doing and doing and doing and doing and doing and doing. And Anna's a doer as well, so I get her. I get exactly where she was coming from. Um, anyway, I'm, I'm really babbling now, so I'm just gonna go and leave you and Wishing you a beautiful day, and I love you lots. You are enough exactly as you are right now, and you're worthy of all the love in the world. Okay, I don't know why my thing's done that. It's gone funny. Bye.